How not to become a PL

I go for a fake GFE. Most people can't seem to understand that a real girlfriend is a whole other ball game. I want the "safer" fake GFE and do not want a real girlfriend no matter how fantastic. I need to pay some $$$ even if not a lot to keep the relationship commercial and manageable. The $$$ is my protection.

I did fall in love once with a perfect dancer. She was everything I could dream of. She refused to accept anymore $$$ from me and would only provide services for free. I refused and she refused to back down. She said it hurt her and was degrading to accept $$$ from me because she liked me. I said then let's be enemies! She got pissed and says she will not accept $$$ from me under any circumstances! She says let me pay you so you can understand how I feel. I say I can't take money from you because you're a woman and work for your $$$. She rolls her eyes. She then says are you sure it is not because I'm black? I say I don't think you will be happy being surrounded by a bunch of crazy white people so yes that is a consideration. But, I'm almost certain that if you were white I'd feel the same way. I NEED a paid relationship. You want to meet my family and friends, fine. You want to go to dinner or the beach, fine. I NEED to pay for your time. She says she can't take the $$$ and she doesn't want or need my $$$. That was it. She wouldn't back down. She was so sweet that I didn't really understand how strong she was. I was 100% positive she would see reason. If I knew from the outset that she would not back down, then I would have caved in and accepted her terms. I can only hope that everything turned out the best for her. She deserved a lot more than she was getting.

Jpac, I agree with you. I am probly one of the younger people on this board and it is hard not to fall into atleast one of the above scenarios when you are single. Strip clubs are great for going out with buddies or having a fun night on the town. Once you start looking for companionship or hope to find a girlfriend, it can really turn into a bitter, depressing activity. It is basicly a negative expectation activity if those are your goals -- you will leave dissapointed every time (unless you are the rare exception that manages to date strippers you meet), and more than likely broke.

When I first turned 21 and my older friend turned me on to strip clubs, it got rather addicting and I found myself wanted to go all the time and going by myself when I couldn't find someone that was able to go. I by no means spent a fortune, but for being young with a shitty job I spent a hell of a lot more than I probly should of. I have only had one or two ATF's over the years, but I think I have always managed to keep myself pretty grounded as to not expect anything more than the typical strip club relationship (if you could call it that), where I would only be able to talk to them if I paid them for their time. I am a bit older and hopefully a bit wiser, now I don't even want an ATF! It is a waste of time and just makes you pissed when they move clubs and you never see them again. Hell, I know people that are still talking about strippers they would visit years ago. It is a pointless obsessions, just go for the fun and hope you see new faces every time.

I've always thought that the proper role of a strip club, at least for me, is as a place of entertainment when you're out of town alone. I go to clubs locally probably less than once a year. But there are towns that I visit regularly and when I do I like having someone there at a club who knows and welcomes me, I just enjoy that, so I cultivate regular relationships in clubs. I have no interest in being a regular at a local club but then I have family and other interests to keep me busy. Some people don't have other interests and so they spend their leisure time hanging out in bars. Seems to me it makes little difference whether there are strippers there or not.

Shadowcat: I didn't say I was looking for love in a stripclub truely there has only been 1dancer that I would deem worthy of being a girlfriend. I was just saying if a person is young and never been married he should focus more on finding someone so he can start a family and not visiting SC's on a regular basis. It doesn't matter if your visiting for entertainment or not it is not healthy to go to a stripclub frequently because that is lost time that you could have been doing something to better your life if you are a younger person like me. Most of you guys have lived your life but for a guy in his 20's or 30's he needs to establish his own.

Hi Jpac73,

I'm not so sure it is a negative for a young guy to become a regular in a strip club (if he can afford it or has the right culture). It is a negative for *some* young guys to become regulars just as it is negative for *some* young guys to join the military.

I don't think it is even necessarily bad to look for love in a strip club. But, unless you were raised in the "gutter" then that is almost always a very bad idea. I am like a fish out of water in the 9 to 5 world and I would have been better off staying almost completely illiterate. Now, I wouldn't recommend that for other people. It gets down to what a person values in life. I valued that white trash club that I knew was soon to be finished. Other people would rightly see no value there.

The point I'm trying to make is that one man's poison may be another man's honey. It sounds like strip clubs may be a poison to you. Another saying I like is that the grass always *seems* greener . . .

Hi Jpac73,

I'm not so sure it is a negative for a young guy to become a regular in a strip club (if he can afford it or has the right culture). It is a negative for *some* young guys to become regulars just as it is negative for *some* young guys to join the military.

I don't think it is even necessarily bad to look for love in a strip club. But, unless you were raised in the "gutter" than that is almost always a very bad idea. I am like a fish out of water in the 9 to 5 world and I would have been better off staying almost completely illiterate. Now, I wouldn't recommend that for other people. It gets down to what a person values in life. I valued that white trash club that I knew was soon to be finished. Other people would rightly see no value there.

The point I'm trying to make is that one man's poison may be another man's honey. It sounds like strip clubs may be a poison to you. Another saying I like is that the grass always *seems* greener . . .

Jpac73, I agree with you! Indeed, you make some very good points - strip clubs are for superficial R-rated entertainment somewhat akin to a 3-D in-the-flesh girly magazine experience. By the way, the strippers care about as much for the customers as the naked images care about the buyers of the girly magazines - zilch! Don't take it personally; they just want your money.