If a stripper wants to "get lunch"?

2/27/2005 6:45:00 AM

Asking for a little help here! I don't have a lot of experience with strip clubs -- probably fewer than ten visits in my life. The last week, I dropped in on one a couple of times, for the first time in a long time.

It is a little mom-and-pop type place, with some girls who seem to have been there for a long while. I got a couple of dollar dances and a couple of $20 private dances. I certainly can't afford to be a big spender.

Last week I got a dancer in a private dance who was very, very good -- very sensual, erotic, gave a little grab and squeeze. Best dance I ever had. I went back and saw her again. We chatted a little -- how long she'd been dancing, her two kids, her ex-husband in prison, how she wouldn't want to go to a full-nude place, about her being older than she looks (31). We went in for the private dance, and I got the same contact as the week before, plus some -- more than a grab and squeeze, an invitation to touch a certain previously off-limits spot, plus she pulled up my shirt, sucked my fingers, and licked my ear.

We chatted a little afterward. I told her that was great, that she want home to a lucky guy. She told me she only went home to herself and her kids. And then she gave me a real kiss (mouth, tongue), then nuzzled and sucked on my neck. She said we should have lunch sometime. I chuckled and told her that I'm sure she said that to lots of guys who drop cash there to get them to come back.

So she marched me up to the bar, told me her real name, and gave me what she said was a cell phone number, saying I should call.

Now, I'm no fool: I know I'm a customer. I have no delusions of romance. I don't expect to "save" her from this life or anything ridiculous like that.

What I want to know is what to expect if I were to follow up. What does an invitation to take her to lunch imply? What should I beware of?

10 comments

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FONDL

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20 years ago

Personally I think it's interesting to see a dancer outside the club. They're often very different people than the one you see in the club. And I've yet to have one of them try to turn it into a money making venture but maybe that's because of the kind of dancer that I go for. Anyway if the alternative is eating alone I find it to be fun. Plus I've found that once they've gotten to know you outside the club they treat you very differently inside the club. Go for it.

Dain

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20 years ago

If a stripper wants lunch, I would offer her either lunch at the Y or a hot protein injection.

SuperDude

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20 years ago

Don't fall for it. You are heading for a heartache and an empty wallet.

FONDL

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20 years ago

Because of the nature of their work, I've found that a lot of these gals don't really have many close friends that they can talk to, and that may be all she's looking for. Then again she might be looking for a private customer or even a sugar daddy, there's only one way to find out.

As far as the age business, if she's 31 and doesn't look it, and if she works in a little Mom and Pop type place, chances are that she can continue working for a lot more years if she wants to. Little neighborhood places often have dancers in their 40's.

I've had lunch and dinner with several dancers and that's all it was, lunch or dinner. It's usually a combination of semi-friends, good public relations and just something fun to do. In one case for me it turned into a real friendship, which I don't think is all that unusual, but it takes a long time.

phonehome

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20 years ago

As said go into this with your eyes wide open. It is probably a sales gimmick and money will always be "important" That said she might actually like you so who knows? If it starts to look like it is the latter, keep something else in the back of your mind, as was said before if she is in her 30's then the end of her days dancing is coming up fast. If she got into dancing to support her kids because she had no other marketable skills or at least ones that would make what she makes dancing, then she probably still does not, so what is she going to do then? Maybe just maybe she sees that day coming up fast and is looking for some guy (any guy) to take care of her, or to be a little more blunt be her next meal ticket. Now if it turns out you like her, she is pretty hot looking and maybe a bonus great in bed and likes to be there fairly often and her kids are not total monsters you won't mind being used, You don't say how long she has been dancing but even if has only been a few years a lot of dancers start veiwing men pretty quickly as walking dollars signs, she could see you as one, probably in the typical customer way but you can look like one in other ways too.

There can be any number of things going on here

johnnylingo

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20 years ago

Had a similar situation about 2 months ago - she said maybe when I stop in next time, we could go out for a beer. Unfortunately she works day shift and I haven't been able to find her since (she's still there, just bad luck). She's 29.

But anyway, I came to the same conclusion. Take her word for it and go ahead assuming you're interested in at least a friendship, but be wary that it can be a ruse to get to back to the club and spend more money on her.

Hopefully I'll get a chance to check this out soon and will share what my findings were.

casualguy

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20 years ago

There may be a few dancers still dancing in their 40's, but I didn't ask how old they were. I don't think females like that.

casualguy

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20 years ago

A little side note here. If a dancer is in her 30's she is already almost out of the strip club business. It's just a matter of time before the 20 something competition forces her out of a job. I personally like some of the 30 something dancers but that seems to be the reality. Some clubs may employ older dancers but I don't think that many do.

casualguy

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20 years ago

Sounds simple to me if you like her and she's single and you're single. I'd go out to lunch. Of course with strippers you have to always be wary of attempts to get cash or hear of some story if she's trying to pull one over on you. It might help to let her know you're on a budget and can't afford to go to strip clubs very much but decided to splurge with lunch. That way if she's only after money, she might decide there are easier targets elsewhere.

Yoda

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20 years ago

quiteguy: It could be a sales gimmick to keep you interested or she may actually like you. More likely it's the former than the latter but some of my best friends are dancers or ex-dancers so I'm not going to say it can never happen. Call the number, if she steers you away from lunch conversation and starts asking when you are coming to see her at work again that's a good indication that she is only really interested in cultivating a customer. If she goes to lunch with you but tries to get you to take her shopping or tries to borrow money from you again, a red flag should go up. I'm not as cynical as some when it comes to dancers but I do recognize the fact that dancing is their job and getting and cultivating regulars is a big part of that. A good dancer is a good actress. Just keep your eyes open and see where it goes. Don't be too disappointed if it turns out to be about the money-in that case, just enjoy the dances.

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