Strangest thing you heard a stripper say?

I can't remember all the weird shit they've said to me over the years. On my last trip to my #3 club, just this past Thursday, on a night I would normally be at work except I was off that day, I bought a lapdance from a dancer and apparently, I didn't grab ahold of her tits fast enough, because then she goes "are you gay?" She had a horrible dancing style you couldn't predict from her stage dance, so she made it hard to touch her tits. That was a one and done.

A Reese Witherspoon look-a-like, during a lap dance said "all men are ass holes". She did not get a second dance.

Dice,you do know she's a hooker.

Shark dude -- were you moving stuff wit' your mind?

Dice,you see Shadowcat over there,he dated Marge Schott.

Its not all about the money

Yeah right

A 30-year-old stripper said, "I've only had sex with 3 guys besides you."

Maybe she meant that night?

Here are a couple of comments I have heard over the years from dancers, some are just plain stupid, some are way out there.

The most stupid by far said the following: "That dancer over there," as she points her out to me, "gives us all a bad name. The only reason she is so popular is because she breaks the rules in her dances."

Not only did the dancer give me an excuse not to get a dance from her, she ended up pointing me to a dancer who became a long time favorite of mine.

The strangest one was way out there. While at my table she kept talking about karma and energy and other new age BS. She was hot and cute so I finally asked her for a dance. When we got in the back she jumped on top of me before the dance started and began by giving me an impromptu palm reading with lots of BS, then looks at me in the eyes and says that she is "reading my inner soul to see what kind of dance I would like." Which she did for about a minute before she next song started.

She gave a pretty decent dance, and would have been great if she would have just shut up during the entire dance, but kept going on and on about negative and positive karma, and sexual energy.

^^^New age BS,tell me about it.That wasn't Platinum Plus Columbia was it?Did she start in on Unicorns?

I havent heard nothing weird yet but i hate when im in the strip club and i didnt bring alot of money and strippers keep going up to you to say how are u doin even tho i know that she wants money , i try not to make to make eye contact lol when passing by one and get my beer at the area the strippers are not sittin at

^^^^^I'm assuming you didn't go to UCONN.

I was merely telling a dancer a story about a dust devil I ended up inside of as it formed around me. Then she asked me a weird question as if asking if I caused it. Now that is crazy I thought. I was wondering if she knew what a dust devil was. I wasn't talking about vacuum cleaners. Weird stuff I think of does sometime happen. I think I would go crazy wondering if I was really in a coma creating events in this world because this entire world could be something I dreamed up. If this world is something I dreamed up, I'd like my dream to go lucid and enjoy it. Maybe win a hundred million dollars secretly, get super powers and super intelligence and have abilities to travel anywhere in the universe in a flash.

One blonde told me she was a student at the local junior college. I asked her what she was studying. "Psychiatry," she explained.

Had a girl ask me my name, then ask me where I was from. When I said from here (the city the club I was in), she started telling me I was not a native American, so I was not actually from here and I had immigrated from europe and should tell people I come from europe. WTF?

Tumblingdice, the new age BS happened about 8 years ago in Cleveland Ohio at a place called Cleveland's PM. I don't believe it exists anymore.