tuscl

Strippers say the darndest things

VeryBigDawg
Georgia
Stripper: I want to get a shark.
Me: What? (thinking I misunderstood with the loud music).
Stripper: I want to get a pet shark.
Me: Why don't you get a cat? (thinking the cat would be smart enough to move out when she forget to feed it).

After a couple of high quality dances, we got to discuss in more detail. This girl had done her research. The pet shark would cost $2k and the tank would cost $3k. Not to mention the maintenance and expensive live salt water fish to feed it. I asked if it was legal to own in GA and she assured me it was. WTF?

OK, have heard some weird shit from strippers, but this has to be in the top 10. What have you heard from them to make you scratch your head?

15 comments

  • Dougster
    •
    11 years ago
    Those numbers sound pretty low. Must be a very small shark.
  • tumblingdice
    •
    11 years ago
    Will you support me when I quit?Wait,was that the 5:15?
  • gawker
    •
    11 years ago
    "Would you like a hit oh heroin? I've got clean needles."
    "Can you send me to Hawaii for drug rehab?"
    "Will you drive 100 miles, pick me up and drive 75 miles to drop me off at a hotel so I can meet another customer, then come pick me up after 2 hours & drive me home?"
  • shadowcat
    •
    11 years ago
    Isn't that what Art Linkletter said? Oh wait. No. That was kids. :)
  • tumblingdice
    •
    11 years ago
    They are entitled Gawker.
  • jester214
    •
    11 years ago
    Sounds more reasonable than the one that told me she wanted to buy a boat after having already told me her car got repoed.
  • rh48hr
    •
    11 years ago
    Gawker- if it wasn't a stripper I wouldn't believe that third one. But I could see a stripper asking that nonsense.
  • VeryBigDawg
    •
    11 years ago
    Dougster those prices seemed low to me too, but was amazed that she was quoting them as if she did the research.

    "Will you drive 100 miles, pick me up and drive 75 miles to ..." Did that bullshit once for a stripper but it was only a 30 mile drive. Did I get off cheap? lol.
  • SuperDude
    •
    11 years ago
    "The cell phone you bought for me just got stolen by my ex-boyfriend. Can you buy me another one?"
  • crazyjoe
    •
    11 years ago
    Dam skippy
  • jackslash
    •
    11 years ago
    "I want to have my boobs re-done. Will you pay for it?"
    This from a dancer whose big boobs I enjoyed but who was not giving me extras.
  • SlickSpic
    •
    11 years ago
    Damn, Jack. The nerve of that gal.
  • crazyjoe
    •
    11 years ago
    Dam skippy
  • rockstar666
    •
    11 years ago
    "We can't move in with my grandfather unless we get married first".
  • sharkhunter
    •
    11 years ago
    Dancer. "Let's go to Vegas. I want to go with you."
    me, surprised I heard that, silence
    Then, "Are you paying for the plane tickets?"
    silence
    I found out how to keep her quiet.
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