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How to have fun in a strip club, the new rules.

AbbieNormal

Maryland

We've been getting a lot of advice and criticism for our unenlightened habbits, so I thought it best to summarize what we've learned.

1) You should go looking to date the stripers, if you don't your deluding yourself about what you want. You should want to date strippers.

2) Don't spend money. Strippers don't respect customers who spend money. If you need to spend money make sure it is only on the dancers you don't find attractive and the waitresses.

3) If a stripper tells you she likes you or enjoys your company immediately stop spending money on her and demand she see you OTC for free, or that she retract those obscene lies about "liking" you.

4) Chat up the attractive strippers you don't spend money on, or ignore them according to "variable reinforcement theory". This will make you popular.

5) Talk to and tip the ugly strippers you don't like. They are useful as "pivots" to make the ones you don't tip or talk to like you.

6) Never spend more than 40 minutes in a club.

7) Make sure to ask the strippers for their real names and phone numbers.

8) Ask the strippers you don't spend money on to date you.

9) If you aren't sure if a stripper likes you (i.e. which partition you are in) because you have randomly chatted with her, or ignored her according to "variable reinforcement theory" try to kiss her on the mouth.

10) Never forget that these women you are trying to date are lying deceiving heartless cold mercenary bitches wholy unworthy of you or even the most minimal human decency.

Sounds like a plan to me! Have fun your next visit!