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Step Aside rickdugan! Here is an Even Better System!

Hi, everyone, it's me jester214 (or as Dugly very disrespectfully calls me "the jestie-girl". Fuck that loser.) Anyway, I have the greatest admiration for rickdugan and not just because of how he really puts Dugly in line but also because of the system for paying hookers for sex that he developed. It's a really good system, but what about for guys like me who can't afford a suit, even a white three-piece one on a janitor's salary. A different approach is called for in that case. I propose that others in my sad predicament do what I do. I call it "The Jestie-Girl System". Here's how it goes -


- Wake up early in the morning

- piss in your own corn flakes, so you'll be pissed off the entire day

- get a hardon because you like being pissed off

- don't bother taking the anti-depressants your doctor prescribed you

- go to work at your job as a janitor

- get pissed at the world because you really wanted to be in the foreign service not a lousy janitor

- sniff the solvents you are supposed to use to clean toilets

- get brain damage and write how the Finns could have avoided the Winter War altogether if they had simply acquiesced to Stalin's very reasonable pre-war demands

- make stupid, contradictory arguments on TUSCL and then spazz out when people (if Dugly can even be called a person) point out the internal inconsistencies

- try to bail yourself out by misreading Wikipedia, but get even more tangled up

- now, thoroughly depressed and pissed at the world visit a strip club

- as strippers approach whine to them about how miserable your life is

- also whine to strippers about how sucky the world is in general

- whine to strippers about how there are so many stupid people in the world

- say your signature line - "fuck this! fuck that! Fuckin' fuck everything"

- leave without getting extras because you can't afford them on a janitor's salary

- go home and cry!