tuscl

Fucked up things we hear

Avatar for rickdugan
rickduganVerified and Certifiable Super-Reviewer

Her: [after we had been speaking for some time] You sound like a good Dad.

Me: I try to be, but if I was really that good I wouldn't spend so much time in these fucking places. [I say with a smile].

Her: Well, at least you won't rape them. [She says almost casually].

Me: What?! Of course not, they're my daughters! Why would you say something like that? [I was momentarily angry and perplexed]

Her; 'Cause that's what mine did.

This wasn't even down south, but rather in a club in Philly. The shit we hear.

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Avatar for jackslash
jackslash

Q What did the stripper say after she lost her virginity?
A Get off me, Dad.

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Avatar for goodsouthernboy
goodsouthernboy

Just a question: why the reference to "down south"?

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Avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan

southernboy, only clarifying because I've been telling a lot of stories lately about clubbing in the deep south and some of the issues I'm seeing vs. the northeast. I wanted to make sure that everyone understood that this didn't fall into that category.

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Avatar for Estafador
Estafador

so essentially, he's stereotyping but with good reason. Damn ricky boy, i hope you had the decency to NOT ask for P4P

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Avatar for goodsouthernboy
goodsouthernboy

Lol, nice save...

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Avatar for rediguan
rediguan

Rick - you sounded like a politician on that escape.

I don't banter too much with dancers but I always ask if dancing is all they do and almost every time they are saving money for school. When I ask what they are going to do that is when the answers start to get interesting:

Most common: Hairdresser
Most crazy: economists (Huh!)

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Avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan

Escape or save? LOL, not at all. To be perfectly clear, all of my best prison, child custody, baby daddy drama, and drug stories have come from places like Jacksonville and Pasco County FL, Greenville SC and Fort Worth TX. And I've never seen a higher concentration of ROBs in one area as I've found in Jacksonville (FL), a few stories from which I've recently shared.

I'm just not pinning one daddy rape story on the South because it didn't happen there, but believe me when I say that this is an anomaly given where the good stuff usually comes from. ;)

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Avatar for Alucard
Alucard

Hmm...

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Avatar for toysales
toysales

I hear the same stuff here in the south but when I ask where she is from its almost always New York or Philly.

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Avatar for Estafador
Estafador

toysales, she probably lying her ass off.

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Avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat

This is the "New South". Damn near everybody, including me, is from some where else. :)

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Avatar for tumblingdice
tumblingdice

The most fucked up thing I ever heard was"I love you".

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Avatar for duomaxwell
duomaxwell

Customer: "You can be my little girl... incest is best!"

Me: "...why would you ever say that out loud."

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Avatar for sclvr5005
sclvr5005

Ewww for this whole damn thread.

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Avatar for 3LeggedMan
3LeggedMan

Sclvr +1

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Avatar for gawker
gawker

That's a very old saying that I first heard more than 50 years ago: "Vice is nice, but incest is best."

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Avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan

Esta posted: "Damn ricky boy, i hope you had the decency to NOT ask for P4P"

I did not so much as lay a finger on her. LOL. As both a father and a guy 20 years her senior, her story killed any sexual thoughts I had about her.

Instead I took another girl around her age for OTC that night. ;)

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Avatar for Estafador
Estafador

.......welp, I can't ask for much more than that from rick I suppose.

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Avatar for Alucard
Alucard

"but I always ask if dancing is all they do and almost every time they are saving money for school. When I ask what they are going to do that is when the answers start to get interesting"

I dancer who was an ATF in 2011, who retired in early 2012 to devote 100% of her time to schooling, is pursuing a Business Degree. Plans on running her own business.

Two other dancers said they did hairdressing on the side.

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Avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter

I once heard a dancer involved in a child custody dispute say she was going to show the judge she had a stable work record working two years as a dancer. Then she asked me if I thought that would work. No idea. I had concerns with the unholy attitude of some judges that the judge might think the job of stripper is not stable at all. The judges probably think working in the mafia is a better profession but maybe not. When someone I know pops up in a strip club and then tells me his friend is the son of the mafia boss for the county, that is messed up. If the mafia was active where I used to live, that might explain all the murders. It seemed like there was one high profile murder every month.

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Avatar for Lone_Wolf
Lone_Wolf

Recently:

Her: My husband left me for a friend of mine two weeks after I was diagnosed with breast cancer.

Me: That's messed up

Her: Yea, went thru hell but had the reconstructive surgery and I'm okay now.

Me: That's great.

Her: Do you want some dances

Me: Sure

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Avatar for ilbbaicnl
ilbbaicnl

The best thing about that story is that there's a good chance she was lying.

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Avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat

Me: Hi XXX. How are ya today?

Her: Not so good. I don't feel like being here but I need the money.

Me: what's wrong?

Her: 3 guys came into my apartment the other day held a gun up to my boyfriend head and blew his brains out. Then they held the gun to my head and took my $1100.

Me: Damn. I can understand why you don't want to be here. Maybe you should just go home.

Her: I can't. I need money. Do you want to do a VIP?

Me: Sorry, no.

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Avatar for joewebber
joewebber

wow. i know exactly which dancer SC is talking about

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Avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan

ilbbaicnl posted: "The best thing about that story is that there's a good chance she was lying.

Anything is possible, but I don't think she was. She was silent after she said it, got up a few moments later and just walked away without saying another word. It was an odd moment. She was young, 21 if I remember right. Maybe the pride and joy I have for my kids, and my description of their lives in general (we were talking for a while), made her feel sad about her own childhood, which really was not that long ago. Idk.

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Avatar for GoVikings
GoVikings

@duomaxwell

Damn, that's messed up. I don't get why someone would say something like that. Maybe he was just trying to be funny? Obviously that's not funny and I'd imagine it make for a very awkward moment for you

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