If you had a regular and found out he was seriously ill or hurt, would you care? would you be upset that you lost that stream of revenue (disregarding your other regulars for arguments sake) or would you genuinely worry about his health and/or safety?
Been thinking about an old argument Alucard and I had a while back and wanted to post this question
There is one dancer I know who has said she'd be concerned about me in the sort of scenario the OP has presented. Won't know for sure unless the serious illness or injury happens. IN my particular situation I believe her.
Of course, there are MANY, MANY members here who constantly say NEVER believe anything told to you by a dancer. It basically comes down to your own feelings about a person's truthfulness in expressing concern about you.
Personally I'd believe this particular woman I know more than I'd believe many members here.
Need to put my anti-attack clothes on now! LOL
In gawker's situation, she would have more credibility if she came by the hospital or the house. If she is asking to see you again, that means to me that she wants you to stop by the club. If it is impossible to see each other (wife is at home during the recovery or something) and she really wanted to see you, she could set up a meeting t Denny's or something. Hate to say it, but she would still feel pretty good if you sent a surrogate with your wallet to the club. Come to think of it, if she only put forth small gesture now (a card, a visit, a small token of the "friendship"), she could easily recoup that from you in short order. She is not thinking about customer service past today.
It's possible, maybe not likely, but possible.
Hilarious how some here have absolutely no understanding of the way dancers are (and why).
Well don't just laugh, enlighten us, Dougster.
GoVikings: want me to cast some pearls before the swine, huh?
This is insane. Why would anyone care about this??? If I had some sort of accident, I know my FAMILY and FRIENDS would care, but STRIPPERS???/
What the hell guys... are we really this lonely that people who are only in our lives because they give us boners for money should care about our well being?
I hope you can get some real friends soon fellas.
Dougster- I honestly have no idea what that means, I just want you to elaborate on your first post in this thread.
Unless you were a total asshole (read: Dugly) they would have to be a pretty jaded person to not feel some sympathy, especially coupled with the loss of monetary income.
But that's a knee jerk human reaction. It doesn't require some intimate emotional bond.
I agree with you totally jester214.
Even though it's solely a business interaction between a customer and a dancer, I still feel like people grow found of each other after spending a lot of time with one another. It's just natural.
So even if it's on a little bit, I do think she would be concerned.
It's a pretty well known saying, Vikings. Surely, a quick google of it would produce zillions of hits.
So even if it's only a little bit*
I'm sure that if I were sick or hurt my ATF would care and offer sympathy and visit me. But if I lost all my money I would never hear from her again.
Ok, I'll spell this out a bit for you guys. There are some strippers who genuine psychopath. That is they are simply incapable of feeling human compassion, probably due to genetic. Slightly less extreme are the sociopahtic ones. They still won't feel compassion, but it's not genetic, so there is hope that one day they might. Also although they might generally be immune to the normal empathy people feel, some may still have some. Would that be likely to include pathetic old fucks who pay them for sex (take advantage of them in their minds) and end up in the hospital? Not a hope in hell in my opinion.
They you have other types of strippers with diminished capacity for empathy for various other reasons. Some are narcissitic. This is fairly close to being sociopathic, but not quite as bad. Others have other types of problems which they are so absorbed in that that might feel some sympathy for a few moments, but it's going to pass pretty quickly, and they'll be absorbed by their own problems in no time. And, as I said, above, not forget that most strippers just feeling you are the exploiter by taking advantage of their situation anyway and forcing them into sex for money. Not likely you will get compassion even though "you" may think you deserve it.
I think your best bet of getting sympathy would be if you never paid for sex, or lap dances, but just tipped stages show, weren't in often enough for them to consider a pervert or otherwise subhuman, and even then it would only be with the ones who were relatively healthy psychologically, i.e. very few of them have that capacity to being with!
I'd put the odds at 2% if you don't pay for sex, and about 0.1% if you do.
You'll never get a "true" answer I hope you know. Two reasons
women like to make themselves seem like they're ever so rightous. Only true hood rat chicks would honestly say no and give you their tattered up story why. And even then they'll try to make themselves look good. If my frienship relied on saying if my friend was pretty, yet she was ugly and she wanted me to be truthful, do you expect me to be truthful (given that I do care about our friendship)?
there's not even dancers here to answer your question
King I live with a dancer and yes I've seen her shed a tear at a PL's funeral.
Even=enough
Dougster, your review is the finest psychological comment on strippers that I have ever read. I suspect that you are a professional psychologist or professor.
Dougster's analysis is good, but left out borderline personality disorders. Google that, read the characteristics, and tell me that doesn't fit a high percentage of dancers.
PL
apparently you guys can't read. OP asked for opinions from dancers, not smelly old perverts.
truth is, we dancers do develop feelings for some regulars. do we make good gfs or wives? probably not, but that's different. don't believe all these old coots, they're just sore because no dancer ever fell for THEM.
@gawker: there's a bunch if stuff I swept under "various other problems". Don't want to be accused of handing out dynamite to children.
And borderlines might actually have sympathy for regulars if they were in ideation part of an ideation/devaluation cycle. The second the regular did anything wrong (in their minds ) then look out!
I believe carolynne got it right.
But the question asked was. "would you care?" The loss of $'s alone might make a dancer "care".
And I agree with Estafador about your chances of getting a "true" answers from dancers on this matter.
you guys are too much. everyone here is always saying "there's more fish in the sea!" well, i feel the same way. if i care about a customer, it's not because of his money... i can always find a replacement for that. i start to care if he's fun and treats me with respect and is a good guy. no mystery here, guys, we're women just like the rest.
Carolynne makes a valid point.
I would venture that for the typical stripper and a very regular customer it might extend a little, perhaps only a very little, beyond the loss of a revenue stream. I've certainly seen plenty of other service oriented businesses who like their customers as people, no reason why erotic dancers should be all that different.
If you want to get a better handle on how a dancer “feels about you†– next time you see her at the SC, tell her you don’t have any $$$ and see if her treatment towards you is the same.
Also, how would you truly feel if it was the dancer whom fell ill – would you be overly concerned and/or shed a tear – or would just console yourself with a BJ in the VIP from another dancer :)
Carolynne has a good point. I resolve to stop treating her like a hot chick and give more respect to her analysis. (That is if she in fact really does exist.)
i'd rather be treated like a hot chick!
Post-PL here, man. Even in civilian life women want a man that makes more shine than her man, there is a reason for that. LTW!!!
Dugly's had three sophomore psych classes so I'm sure his opinion was full of definitions he pulled out of whatever text book he's been assigned.
Lol! Actually I read graduate level texts.
And I, of course, don't Carolynne's situation in great detail, but it's very rare for strippers in these parts to have a super abundance of regulars with lots if cash who are readily replacable. If that were the case extra won't be as easy to score these days as they are.
It would be interesting to post this on Stripper Web to see what kind of answers you would get.
Who is brave enough to query on The Pink Site?
Step one - Get on life insurance policy
Some dancers do get attached to customers especially if they've had some interaction away from the clubs. One dancer even started crying when I told her I was moving out of state.
I had another dancer stalk me all night when I visited the club and she called me for no particular reason. In both cases, I believe the dancers wanted me to be their new boyfriend but I wasn't interested. I refused to give the last dancer my phone number when I ran into her at a different club. She told me she found someone else so I didn't know why she wanted my number.
Most dancers might care about you just as much as any other human you hear about getting shot or killed. Maybe more if they liked you. If they wanted a new boyfriend, maybe even more. I believe many dancers care more than I would care visa versa. I forget people if I don't see them very often.
In my experience, people who's only or primary source of income is commissions have less empathy than average. They have more superficial bonds with others in general.
You mean like stock brokers (txtittyfuck) or salesmen (RickyBoyDugan)?
The reason dancer like there regulars is because they give them more money than everyone else. We do have rare cases when this is not true.
Is it possible for a dancers to have feelings for a regular other than monetary? I would say yes because every one is different and we joke about them all being cold hearted gold diggers because many are but many likely are not and have an attachment to a regular that has treated her nice. I think carolynne has the heart of it. I would think that a dancer would not make the transition from paid OTC to girlfriend well because of history on both sides.
Well...It all depends on the bonds they form. When I had my stroke and was in the hospital in NYC. My stripped friends from Orlando came to visit me. ALL 6 ! I hadn't seenthem in years and most I never ever tipped! It was the friendship that was started years before that made them truly concerned about me. I still keep in touch with all of them and attended one wedding. You have to remember guys...strippers ARE woman, and appreciate it if you treat them with kindness and respect. By the way I am glad they came as a group...it was easier to explain them to my wife...LOL
I've been seeing my ATF OTC for almost four years. I know she's had 2 other regulars she's been seeing outside as we'll. her boyfriend just got out of prison a couple of months ago and she told him about the three of us and he acquiesced know king a good source of income when he benefits from it. After several weeks the boyfriend tells her if she want S to see the other 2 that's ok, but he wants her to stop seeing me cause she cares too much about me. I guess that's a compliment. Shortly after that, I had quadruple bypass surgery and 4 weeks into my recovery she's called me several times, wants to know when we can meet,etc. I don't know if its me or my wallet she misses, but I'd like to think its both.