PET PEEVES

37 comments

• Alucard

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  12 years ago

  A per trip fee for the VIP ROOM.
• motorhead

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  12 years ago

  I hate valet parking too - but I almost prefer that to lack of parking / tiny parking lots.
• Papi_Chulo

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  12 years ago

  Latest pet peeve, which has been mentioned b/f on this site, is the super annoying DJ. I am a white guy but I like black dancers so I often go to black dives. DJs at black dives (as well as any other metric of customer service) are the worst. Two of my last visits to two different black dives: 1) The DJ thought “he” was the main attraction and not the dancers. He kept cutting off the song every 10 seconds in order to hear himself talk – it was impossible to get a lap dance – ended up leaving the club. 2) The DJ thought he was really talented and wanted to show off his “DJ skillz” by mixing songs in and out – i.e. he would start playing a song and often times after a minute and half switch to a different song – what a freaking moron.
• londonguy

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  12 years ago

  Mandatory drinks purchases for VIP room visits Drinks prices that border on highway robbery CLubs that charge entrance fees during the daytime when the club is as good as empty
• jackslash

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  12 years ago

  Naked women who block my view of the TV.
• Dougster

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  12 years ago

  The bathroom troll is by far my biggest pet peeve. I'd gladly make a deal with the stripper gods to get rid of all these guys for a year even if it cost me three years of "buy the lady a drink"?
• snowtime

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  12 years ago

  Just go back from a Sat. afternoon visit at my favorite club. Arrived at 2pm which is usually early enough to avoid valet parking. I drive a beat up 1994 car,but still detest the mandtory VIP. I even told the guy I would pay the fee and park it myself. No deal, so I parked across the streety and walked. That is my number one peeve. Second would be extremely loud music. One club I used to visit should offer ear plugs. Third would be admission fee to lap dance room. Just put all the fees into the dance price and I would be much happier.
• SuperDude

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  12 years ago

  $20.00 charge to sit in a booth. Shot girls. VIP fees. Overpriced dancer drinks.
• rickdugan

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  12 years ago

  I have a few: 1. Music that is so damned loud that I cannot even talk with the girls. Ala Clubhouse in Dallas, Riviera in Queens, NY, Platinum Plus in Greenville, SC, and others. 2. Walking out of a club stinking like some $5 per jug perfume. 3. Merchandise or shot promo dances. 4. Pastie/bikini clubs. Pasties really take something away from the whole thing IMHO. 5. Enforced valet parking requirements, which happens in some Dallas clubs that I visit. I want to leave when I want to leave and I hate having to wait while someone fetches my car. 6. Enforced coat checks, which are not uncommon in certain NYC clubs. My issue with it is really the same one I have with enforced valet parking, which is that it holds me up when I simply want to leave. 7. Club-wide tip walks. Milwaukee clubs are notorious for this and I don't even know if half of the girls I tip were ever on stage. I don't mind tipping, but their constant appearance interrupts the flow of whatever else I am trying to do with the dancer sitting next to me. 8. High pressure, high cost "dancer drink" gimmicks. The clubs on the Block in Baltimore are the worst offenders that I have ever seen, though the Glass Slipper in Boston doesn't do such a shabby job of it either. Anyway, those are the ones that come immediately to mind.
• farmerart

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  12 years ago

  I hate the fucking valet parking fees.
• Alucard

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  12 years ago

  With your money Art?
• crecat03

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  12 years ago

  I seem to be in the minority here but I actually kind of like $5 valet parking. especially in really crowded areas where parking can otherwise be difficult to find or overcrowded. I trust the valets to not damage it more than I trust random other people to not bump my car. My top pet peeve is shot girls. Of course my favorite club does not have shot girls and generally in the daytime and early evening, other clubs rarely have those annoying creatures.
• mjx01

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  12 years ago

  I agree with many of the above (valet, lack of parking, excessively loud music, bathroom troll) Smoking is also a peeve of mine.
• GoVikings

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  12 years ago

  Waitresses who ask "do you want another drink" every other 5 minutes.
• rh48hr

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  12 years ago

  Bathroom troll
• inno123

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  12 years ago

  I have a lot of peeves but I would guess the number one is music that is too loud, particularly when there is nobody on stage. It gets the number one spot because it interferes with the real job of the club which is to get a sexy vibe going with a dancer. You can't do that if you both have to be screaming to be heard. Second place, only because I don't encounter it that often because the clubs here have either abandoned it or I have abandoned them, is the buy-the-girl-a-drink hustle.
• gatorfan

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  12 years ago

  Strippers that demand $5 for the tip rail.
• Club_Goer_Seattle

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  12 years ago

  See my four-part series on Annoying Strip Club Practices, beginning with Part 1: “Wanna Buy the Lady a Drink?” [view link] (posted 5/22/2011) @ papi_chulo and others: The subject of bad disc jockeys was very well addressed by the Strip Club Hound. See: [view link] Enter the phrase "annoying disc jockey" in the search bar at the upper left. It should take you to story entitled, "Disc Jockeys" posted on Wednesday, October 27, 2010. @ rickdugan: Great list. I've seldom had to encounter your #7 (club-wide tip walks), but I find it extremely annoying when dancers ask for tips, especially the practice of them walking the floor after every stage appearance asking for tips. A tip should be voluntary. That practice makes it mandatory.
• shadowcat

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  12 years ago

  I would have to say the mandatory valet parking as well. If there is no other safe place to park nearby, then it is a deal buster. Not that I object to the charge. Just that I won't let some loser, drive my car and hold onto my keys. Once inside then it becomes the excessively loud music & obnoxious DJs.
• Dougster

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  12 years ago

  A minor pet peeve is how much change some places will give you in $1's - "yep, $16 change, let's just give that to you all in $1's". Related is dancers pretending they don't have change on hand for you, in hopes you'll just say "don't worry about it" and give it to them as a tip. Or starting to count out your change with their $1's even though they have larger bills. Keep that shit up, and I'll offload the $30 in $1's I accumulate by using it to pay for a dance!
• Dougster

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  12 years ago

  Most any gimmick the Dena Bu comes up with to sell dances gets pet peeve status. Free dance! Oh but it's only thirty seconds long. A free pass! Oh, but that just covers admission, mandatory drinks is another $10. 3 dances for $30! Oh, but song lenght is greatly reduced! Five free passes if you buy time in the VIP room! Oh yeah, still doesn't cover drinks and expires in a week. What 's the problem anyway? A PL like you is sure to visits 5 times in one week anyway, right?
• Dougster

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  12 years ago

  Dena Bu=Deja vu, of course. And you can FOAD auto-correct.
• rickdugan

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  12 years ago

  I really don't understand the issue with bathroom trolls. I don't mind throwing one of these guys a few bucks over the course of the night, particularly when the bathroom is clean and in good working order. I usually club well after I have had dinner and the chance to enjoy the comforts of my own facilities, but I've had a few times where something just could not wait. A couple of those times occurred in Platinum Plus in Greenville during the 6-8 happy hour. Now I have no idea how this guy felt about me dropping deuces no more than 10 or so feet away from him, but boy was I glad for the clean facilities. ;)
• txtittyfan

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  12 years ago

  My complaint about bathroom trolls is that many clubs do not have the room for them and they do a poor job.
• MrChevy

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  12 years ago

  expensive ass drinks...and strippers with B.O.
• deogol

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  12 years ago

  The sad fact about bathroom trolls, is that 1) people have been pick pockets while standing at the urinal. This is to stop that. 2) people have been jerking off in the bathroom. This is to stop that. 3) people been inviting strippers into the bathroom and yes, the stripper came along. This is to stop that. 4) couples come in and want to get romping on each other. This is to stop that. So whats a club to do? Announce there is monitoring in the bathroom. Kinda creepy. Assign the FNG (fucking new guy) to the bathroom with some mints for sale (that could easily be sold at the bar or food location?).
• deogol

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  12 years ago

  I guess I don't have many pet peeves about stuff I have no problem saying "No thank you" to and I expect deep conversation. It's stuff like the music volume that bothers me. I got sick of coming out of clubs with my ears ringing.
• Dain

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  12 years ago

  Quasi-music that's so loud that I can't hear what the girls are saying.
• sharkhunter

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  12 years ago

  My pet peeves would be some of what was already mentioned such as requiring someone else to park your car. As is though, I've been lucky enough to never experience that so far. If I want to park in valet I can do it myself in all places I've visited so far. My number one pet peeve is change always given in two dollar bills. The Greenville Platinum Plus club does this even if I ask for larger bills. I once paid a dancer in two dollar bills. She didn't like it. Same club. I didn't quite get that one since I thought many of the stage dancers probably got two dollar tips but maybe she wasn't dancing on stage that night. My number two pet peeve is super loud music that makes your ears ring and you have to shout very loud right next to someone's ear to be heard. This has been my experience many times when visiting Platinum Plus in Columbia. The Greenville club is almost quiet in comparison in my opinion. I read in a recent review the music volume was lower on a recent visit in Columbia. Maybe they tuned it down a little. Another pet peeve that could be number one is if there is no parking lot security and someone messes with your car. If no problem which is typical, it is not a pet peeve. I suggest reporting any vandalism to the police so they can come out and document it so that others can be warned if they look at crime reports. Plus management at the club might be willing to let police look at security cameras because they will likely ignore you.
• magicrat

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  12 years ago

  Rick, I've actually gotten to know the daytime bathroom troll at Plat Plus in Greenville, as we know someone in common from my hometown. A minor peeve I have now is that he wants to chat me up when I go in there and I'm ready to get back out to fondle..er..look at some tits!
• minnow

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  12 years ago

  Rick wrote a good list in his 916 post, I'll add my personal perspective on some points: #1- Agreed on that for convo aspect. Related to that gripe are lousy DJ's in 2 genres: a) Those who love to hear themselves talk. b) Those who slur/mumble, and can't pace dancer roll call correctly (can't tell which dancer is Candy or Debbie. #3- Promos really kill the mood/ break up the flow of things. I have enough Tshirts to wax my car, and enough caps to outfit a baseball team. #5- Mandatory valet- Mainly dislike for the idea of handing over my car to a total stranger. While you're in club (if you don't make adjustments in advance) could make copy of housekey, or take down personal info from car registration. I make exceptions to this gripe for business trip/vacation visits-I make sure to pocket rental contract prior to handing keys over. #7- Tip walk. Generally doesn't bother me that much- can be a decent chance to gauge potential prospects. I've only really encountered that in some Philly, San Diego, and Fort Lauderdale/Pompano Beach clubs. #8- I assume Rick meant those clubs that push the "buy a bottle for the ladies time" as standard fare. I got over that genre of "clip joint" over a quarter century ago. "Conventional" overpriced dancer drinks don't bug me that much. It seems that the chain clubs- Deja Vu, and Spearmint Rhino have the most annoying habit of having server latch on to you like a leech when taking dancer back to "VIP", or swooping on to you a split second after dancer sits by you to push dancer drinks on you. I'll close by putting up one of the "laws of nature": When you really want a drink, servers will be absent, or engaged in deep conversation a few feet away with patron or staff. When your drink is half full, and you are at an interesting point in conversation with desired dancer (or about to get a stageside Stevie ), server will invariably interrupt you to ask if you want another drink. Happy Clubbing, all............
• rickdugan

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  12 years ago

  "#8- I assume Rick meant those clubs that push the "buy a bottle for the ladies time" as standard fare. I got over that genre of "clip joint" over a quarter century ago." LOL. Not exactly, but the concept is similar. There are some clubs out there where a dancer cannot sit with a customer unless he buys a specially priced dancer drink. The Block in Baltimore is a notorious example. The dancer drinks are $25 a piece and if she does not have a drink in front of her then she gets the hairy eyeball from the bartender, who gets a cut from each drink sale so is motivated to continuously push them. And of course they suck these little drinks down very quickly. The Glass Slipper in Boston is another example. Same general gimmick except each dancer drink is $30. There are a couple of clubs that still do this in Mobile, AL, as well. However, at least one has the option of buying a value sized version that keeps her there for a while, albeit for $50. ;)
• lopaw

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  12 years ago

  My biggest pet peeve is having to listen to retarded DJ's call out "Gentlemen" or "Boys" before each and every lame announcement. I know that a DJ's job must be SOO freaking difficult that they have to read off of a friggin' script or something. To be so stupid as to not even be aware of & acknowledge who is in the audience is beyond ridiculous. I used to let it go, but nowadays I will light up a moronic DJ if he pulls that shit. But in turn I will tip a DJ who occasionally throws out a "Ladies & Gentlemen" or a "Boys & Girls" once in a while.
• Club_Goer_Seattle

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  12 years ago

  I would love to see DaddysGirl and lopaw go clubbing together sometime!
• Papi_Chulo

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  12 years ago

  One pet peeve that just came to mind that does not occur too often is when a dancer wants to start a LD as soon as you say yes even if it is in the middle of a song and they’ll say “I’ll dance for you into the middle of the next song”. I hate this s***. Like I said, it does not happen often and has happened more in some of the dives. Nowadays, I will just get up or tell the dancer never mind and not get ANY LDs from her if she pulls this crap.
• Estafador

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  12 years ago

  Going to NYC clubs, I never have the problem of valet so that's never an issue. My pet peeves Coat check: wtf? Why the hell do I need to pay to unwillingly give you my coat. Doesn't make sense. And what if there was a weather condition (like snow) that forces us to wear a coat, gonna charge us for trying to stay warm outdoors? Cimplimentery admissions: someone said it before, but the the tricky free admissions ticket. You instead have to still pay for drinks (sometimes 2) which doesn't lessen the blow Lack of goodies: when ALL your preferences are being hogged for HOURS if not ALL NIGHT and there's nothing good left. Or if you only are a rock for the simple fact that NOBODY has offered you a lap in the last 45 minutes.
• lopaw

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  12 years ago

  @Club_Goer- I never have any trouble getting dancer attention at clubs, so maybe I could help her with that ;-) But sadly, neither one of us can fix stupid DJ's. They stubbornly hold onto their stupidity, despite major efforts from more evolved people trying to help them. Such is life, I suppose.