At The Crossroads

avatar for 3LeggedMan
3LeggedMan
Chicago, IL
I met the perfect dancer at my favorite club about a month ago. A cute AA spinner with equal parts hot and tease. This girl does not have a ginormous booty or jumbo knockers, everything is just the right size for my liking. After watching her on stage and spending some time at my table, the decision was clear: Skip the customary single-dance audition and get this hottie right to the Champagne Room. Intuition was correct - lots of 2-way contact including DFK, DATY, and a short period of BBBJ. All in all, very definite ATF material. Back at the table, she provided her number. I took it gladly and assured her that I'd call.

A few days later, I called. She said she was in another city about 40 miles away, and would be dancing at a club there. Egad! This was not good news. I asked why and she said something about the girls at the first club were mean to her. I suppose I believe that since there is some hostility there between the extras girls and the non-extras girls. I'm guessing some non-extras dancer observed some of her special services.

A couple of weeks later, I saw her at the new club. Worth the trip. Most of the same skills were employed. Again she mentioned her phone number and suggested we get together OTC to hang out. She'd even be willing to make the 40 mile drive to my city.

So now I'm at a crossroads. I am married, although the last sex was about 10 years ago. I'm of a mind that if I'm not doing FS with the strippers, I'm still faithful. I appreciate my wife's many other fine qualities, but she's totally disinterested in sex and has let herself go to the point that I'm not that interested, either.

Anyhow, I'm thinking more and more that I should do the OTC with the AA beauty, although I don't know if she'll charge me significantly more than for the ITC action. My typical SC budget has been around $200 a month, but in July $500 seemed to slip away. I can't sustain that rate. I also fear that in an OTC environment, FS could possibly happen, and I'd hate myself for that. On the other hand, I'm crazy about the girl. She sets off fireworks that NO other woman has.

I'm wondering if A) the OTC is going to cost me considerably more that the half-hour ITC VIP sessions, and B) would she be expecting (wanting?) FS with me, or is it just anything I want for x amount of minutes. Do any of you OTC veterans have some insight I could use??

21 comments

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avatar for PussyLick
PussyLick
12 years ago
If you haven't had sex with your wife in 10 years, I think you've got bigger problems than weather or not you are "faithful" by your definition. I think you are asking the wrong question...
avatar for Revolution
Revolution
12 years ago
3leg: I'm in the same boat marriage-wise. For me personally the risk of otc might be too great. I know another member who was perfectly happy with his SC addiction but got caught the first time he even thought about OTC. My wife knows about my clubbing so OTC would be breaking our unofficial agreement.

Still, I do wonder what I would do in your shoes. I have pushed the limits at the club so I'm not sure I could trust myself outside.
avatar for Revolution
Revolution
12 years ago
3leg: I'm in the same boat marriage-wise. For me personally the risk of otc might be too great. I know another member who was perfectly happy with his SC addiction but got caught the first time he even thought about OTC. My wife knows about my clubbing so OTC would be breaking our unofficial agreement.

Still, I do wonder what I would do in your shoes. I have pushed the limits at the club so I'm not sure I could trust myself outside.
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
12 years ago
Please tell me that you're at least getting off with this activity. If you're not, quite wasting your money in a club and go home and jack off to thoughts of your honey. It's cheaper, and your wife isn't likely to object.

Even a "short period of BBBJ" is likely to be considered "cheating" by your wife, and by most interpretations of common wedding vows, irrespective of how you delude yourself. Unless, of course, you're in a position similar to mine, where certain activities are allowed.

If you're not going to go for the full meal deal, there's really little point in going for the OTC, at least in MY opinion, unless she really does just want to hang out and not charge you an arm and a leg. If she just wants dinner, or maybe a little cash, say 50-100 dollars, to "hang out", along with some "DFK, DATY, and a short period of BBBJ", it might be worth it. If it were me, I wouldn't bother, but you appear to be smitten with her.

In the past, when I was actually meeting strippers OTC, I would generally pay *less* per hour than at the club, and get more, and more relaxed, less hurried, action besides. The fact that you don't want sex changes things a little bit. It would have to be a *lot* less than the club cost.

If you're worried about cheating on your wife (and the fact that you're not already worried about it is, in all likelihood, self-deception), I would suggest you avoid situations where you might start thinking with the little head, and just go home.
avatar for Alucard
Alucard
12 years ago
3LeggedMan you are being unfaithful. If your marriage isn't what you want, end it.
avatar for jackslash
jackslash
12 years ago
Take $500, meet up with the stripper, and fuck the shit out of her. Be a man!
avatar for jester214
jester214
12 years ago
Alucard offers his typical advice as if the world is all black and white, and that's just stupid and pointless.

Most of the people on this site are willing to break the law for sex but you tell this guy that he can't ever have sex again unless he ends his marriage? Come on. That's even higher-handed bullshit (hypocritical in a way) than you usually lay out.

I recognize that this is a difficult situation, and I think you should proceed only with a lot of consideration and caution. If one partner still wants sex and another doesn't then I don't think it's the end of the world for them to go get it. Especially if they can do it in a discreet and safe manner that doesn't involve real emotional attachment.

Now setting that aside, you're taking a big risk and you have to weigh that risk versus what you're getting out of it.

To answer A and B: I suspect it will be more expensive but all kinds of negotiations and deals can be worked out.
avatar for Alucard
Alucard
12 years ago
I'm entitled to my opinion, if you don't like it jester214, don't read it.
avatar for steve229
steve229
12 years ago

"When you come to a fork in the road, take it."
- Yogi Berra
avatar for steve3003
steve3003
12 years ago
Hmm... something doesn't jive. You haven't had sex with your wife in 10 years. Your account of your dilemma seems to imply you haven't had FS with anyone, including strippers, in that period of time. You don't seem to be a newbie to mongering (ATF, DATY, BBBJ, etc.) but have been dieting on many things but FS ("sexual relations" as slick willie used to call it) during that time. Sounds like a load of bull. And I'm assuming you ain't billy boy.
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
12 years ago
If $200 per month is your SC budget, then heavy duty OTC activity is probably out of the question anyway, which may be best given your misgivings. If I were you, I would keep it ITC.
avatar for jester214
jester214
12 years ago
Practice your own advice Alucard, back to the hypocrisy point.
avatar for jester214
jester214
12 years ago
Practice your own advice Alucard, back to the hypocrisy point.
avatar for Alucard
Alucard
12 years ago
I am here to make sure you have someone to question & possibly challenge your statements when necessary jester214. LMFAO
avatar for Corvus
Corvus
12 years ago
I am no OTC veteran, but from my perspective if you have already DFK, DATY, and BBBJ with this vixen in the club, you have already had sex with her, however brief or abbreviated. But as OhioVoyeur said above, you have to figure out where your line is to cross or not cross. My line is not your line. But if you like her so much, see her OTC and see how it goes. Just don't fall in love with her or become her sugar daddy. Both potentially very expensive.

And not sure where you live, but for me 40 miles is nothing, so I would put less emphasis on that than you have in your OP. And 40 miles from home is a lot better than down the street. Keep some distance between the house and the playground. Besides, the closest SC for me is about 90 miles from home, so I am a travling clubber. Enjoy being close enough to play easily.

And to answer your second question, if you do see her OTC and especially if you pay her for her time, you do what you want to do. Sex or not, if you are paying, you set the bar where you want it. But I would work that out with her before the OTC encounter. Don't waste your time or her time by waiting until you both meet OTC to figure out what you want to go down.
avatar for motorhead
motorhead
12 years ago
Here are the facts as I understand them:

1. Your wife hasn't provided sex in 10 years.
2. She forbids sex with any other woman.

I don't think the question is whether I see this dancer OTC. I think the question is to
I call Horowitz, Levin, & Cohen or Siegel, Steinberg, & McManus


avatar for smokeshopjoe
smokeshopjoe
12 years ago
Honestly make the 40 mile drive and fuck her. 10 years 10 years mother fucking ten years. I WILL NOT ABIDE ONE WEEK OF NO NOOKIE.

The only woman I would do any thing for and keep in my life while not having sex with is my mother.

If you have kids and your marriage fails just tell them you mom hasnt sexed me up in TEN YEARS! They may not understand but they will.

To be perfectly honest there have been at least a couple of times that me sexing up my lady could have been legally considered rape (honestly what isnt go read you laws). But she is ok with that and so am I.

TEN YEARS
avatar for smokeshopjoe
smokeshopjoe
12 years ago
ALSO " She sets off fireworks that NO other woman has."

Not even your wife?

You don't have a wife you have a roommate!
Buy a $20 disposable tracfone have a good time.
Then call a divorce attny.

You wouldnt own a car that you haven't drove once in 10 years or keep a house that you have not stayed in in 10 years.

Wait i forgot to ask does you wife have cancer and is on chemo? Is she in a coma? Did she take a bullet to the vag? Is there some reason she has not fucked you in 10 years.
avatar for thesamurai
thesamurai
12 years ago
3leggedman, do what you feel you need to. What I wouldn't advise you to do is anything Alucard suggests. Why? Because if you've been following this discussion forum for any length of time you will have developed a profile of just what Alucard is. An old lonely man who works at his job just so he can afford to make his trip every two weeks to a strip club where he gets sex the only possible way he can, by paying a stripper to to close her eyes, hold her nose and sit on his cock. The guy is depressed, takes meds so he can function in life, although he doesn't seem to take them consistently considering he sometimes flies into ragekill mode here. Do you want to be like that "man"? His existence is only the next step up from being dead.
avatar for 3LeggedMan
3LeggedMan
12 years ago
Thanks for the many opinions. I wrote this 3 weeks ago and submitted it as an article. Founder saw fit to wait 3 weeks before bouncing it to the Discussion area. So, there are updates. Although this girl gave me her phone# without me asking, it turns out she never answers the phone or returns messages. Primarily because of the fact I can't contact her without driving 80 miles round trip to see her FTF, I'm not going to pursue the OTC. It seems like a whole lot can go wrong.

About my marriage (although I didn't ask for advice on that) my wife is a wonderful person who just really hasn't had any desire for sex since our last child was born. I have accepted that. She'll do the deed if I ask, but that's hardly satisfying.
avatar for 3LeggedMan
3LeggedMan
10 years ago
2 years later, I was looking back at this thread and thought I'd provide an update. I did set up OTC with the ATF. She charged me 200 per visit (my approximate cost for club entertainment) and to this point have avoided FS (not that she hasn't offered). Currently my employment situation has changed so I'm not staying in that geographical location these days, but I'm hoping to get back there again some day. Having had great times with this lovely black spinner on 5-6 occasions so far, I'm hungry for more. Viva la difference!
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