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Dancers just won't leave me alone!

avatar for tatum123
tatum123
I love going to this one club where i can sit peacefully, sip my whiskey, and try to decide which gorgeous dancer to spend my money on. But it never quite works out that way: these girls just keep coming over, sitting on my lap, and begging me to do them the honor of letting them grind on me for hours at a time, free of charge. I try to tell them that all i want is to spend some money on a quality air dance that goes nowhere, but these girls just never give me what I want; they're too busy begging me to give it to them for free, as they just can't seem to help themselves.

Iniquitous, any advice for this tortured soul?

21 comments

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avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
•
13 years ago
I'm not Iniquitous but I would hire body guards.
avatar for jackattack107
jackattack107
•
13 years ago
I hate it when I forget to turn off my swag and wake up the next day covered in bitches.
avatar for vincemichaels
vincemichaels
•
13 years ago
Is that a problem, tatum123??
avatar for Jackmd
Jackmd
•
13 years ago
Stud
avatar for bang69
bang69
•
13 years ago
why is that a problum
avatar for Electronman
Electronman
•
13 years ago
Advice for the tortured soul:

Move to Chicago, Washington, DC or Grand Rapids, MI or any of the other cities that seem to be candidates for the most boring strip club award. That should take care of your "problem."
avatar for iniquitous
iniquitous
•
13 years ago
"i can sit peacefully, sip my whiskey"

There's your problem my good sir, If they are hot why complain?
avatar for londonguy
londonguy
•
13 years ago
I may be wrong Iniquitous but I think tatum is taking the piss.
avatar for iniquitous
iniquitous
•
13 years ago
indeed
avatar for iniquitous
iniquitous
•
13 years ago
seven shades of shit
avatar for hard10
hard10
•
13 years ago
tatum, you're right. I hate when this happens. In my case, the dancers also try to ply me with liquor by buying me drinks all the time.
avatar for Alucard
Alucard
•
13 years ago
"any advice for this tortured soul?"

QUIT lying.
avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
•
13 years ago
Some of you don't recognize sarcasm when you see it.
avatar for JuiceBox69
JuiceBox69
•
13 years ago
Shit what would juic do ? Glad you asked ! Just pull your pantsdown and start creaming those hot apple pies !
avatar for iniquitous
iniquitous
•
13 years ago
what would jesus do?
avatar for tatum123
tatum123
•
13 years ago
Thank you, Shadowcat.
avatar for Pablo Antonio
Pablo Antonio
•
13 years ago
Tatum:

I have the same problem. All these dancers, especially the Latinas, they love me. Once I speak Spanish to them they turn on the Latin charm and passion.

They buy me shots of tequila, or Coronas with salt and lime, for free. We go to the VIP and have sex for hours. Sometimes when I am coming, I start speaking English and my beautiful Latina gets pissed and storms out of the VIP saying "puta madre". They never ask for money.

Whats a poor guy to do?
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
•
13 years ago
I got the solution. I'd tell them if they want to give you a free dance, that they need to take you home and give you a free BJ first to warm you up. Then it's like no free BJ's first, then no free dances. If you want to include fucking too, that's up to you.
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
•
13 years ago
LOL, at Juice's comment.
:)
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
•
13 years ago
Of course if you don't want a free BJ or whatever, that's when you need a wingman. Someone will need to volunteer to get a BJ or fuck her at her apartment or wherever. The only problem is if she is really determined she might go along with it and then you'll still need to get one of those free dances. However your wingman will take care of all the heavy stuff.
avatar for SuperDude
SuperDude
•
13 years ago
Sounds like a wet dream.
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