The Housemom Thread

chandler
Blue Ridge Foothills
Alas, it has come to this. One topic we haven't covered yet, unless it was before my time here. This must be the ultimate in backstage TMI. Although all clubs seem to find them necessary, I really have no idea what they do. Are they, like, washroom attendants for stripper locker rooms? Do you know of any hot ones?

21 comments

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FONDL
18 years ago
"Herding cats" - I like that, it's a very accurate description. Chitown, I have a feeling that if you found and read an academic dissertation on strippers and strip clubs that there'd be very little in it that you agreed with.
chandler
18 years ago
I agree that it's fascinating. That's a large part of why I enjoy this board. However, when I'm talking to a stripper, it takes a back seat to more stimulating subject matter. I pick up plenty of it regardless from strippers bringing up the topic, so I don't often encourage it myself.
chandler
18 years ago
I guess my bias against talking shop is out of fear that it will kill my buzz. Sort of like the caution against knowing too much about how sausage is made. (No pun intended.)
FONDL
18 years ago
Chandler, I guess I'm just the opposite. I do like to talk shop in a strip club, I'm always curious to understand how things work. I think strip clubs and strippers are a fascinating sub-culture and I'm always trying to understand them better. That's why I ask so many questions and pose so many theories here.
Yoda
18 years ago
Chandler: Strippers seldom talk about housemothers. I know what I know from actually talking to housemothers. As I said, I know a couple that are hotties, both started out as waitresses-which is where I got to know them. If I didn't know them before they where house mothers I probably wouldn't know them at all. Most of the time they are too busy tracking down dancers to stop and talk with customers...unless it's a guy who used to tip them well...
chandler
18 years ago
I've done my share of talking with strippers, and the subject of a housemom has hardly ever come up. In fact, it was a few years into my clubbing life before I knew such a creature existed. And longer before I realized they were a regular feature. I guess it depends on how much you talk shop. In my case, not much.
Yoda
18 years ago
This is also very true in my experience as well. A favorite dancer of mine was lamenting when she first started working that she wasn't getting enough shifts. I asked her how much she was tipping the housemother each night and suggested she increase it to twice the amount. After that increase she was told she could work any day or night that she wanted as long as she fulfilled the club's three shift minimum each week.
T-Bone
18 years ago
Yoda is right on.

Just wanted to add that some house moms have hire/fire authority as well. Some can be real authoritarian in their role...
Yoda
18 years ago
Chandler: I like strip clubs and I like to talk to women. What can I say? I may treat clubs and the people in them as more of a social environment rather than strictly a place to go get grinds or stare at naked women (though I do enjoy both of those activities as well). House moms are a vital part of what makes a club work and, in many cases, have quite a bit to do with who we get to see how they behave when we see them. Oddly, two of the hottest looking women I know are two housemothers who have never danced. I find that, in and of itself, to be a fascinating conversation starter when I run into them.

I could probably spout about as much inane strip club trivia as anyone would care to hear (or probably NOT want to hear, lol)

Was it Popeye who once said "I am what I am"?
chitownlawyer
18 years ago
I'm with FONDL on this one. I think that the strip club business is fascinating: how the dancers got into a business that, even when done totally legally, involves breaking numerous social taboos (keeping your hands to yourself and keeping yourself covered up), the "herding cats" management issues involved in running a club; the interface between management and LE; the differing motivations for the customers, who pay for what are frequently intimate, but basically anonymous encounters. If I was willing to put forth the effort, I would review the indices of academic journals in psychology, sociology, etc., because I am sure that someone has done serious research into clubs--and if they haven't, they should.
FONDL
18 years ago
I also used to hang out in a club that was run entirely by women, the only men in the place were the customers. I guess one of the women acted as a housemom. There were two older ladies as I recall, one of them collecting admission, plus a younger barmaid or two. And they kept a very close eye on what was going on - no extras in that place. Fun place though, girls crawled around naked on top of the bar to collect tips and laps were done in the nude on comfy couches.
chandler
18 years ago
Something told me this thread wouldn't be complete until you chipped in, Yoda. Do you hang out in girls' locker rooms, or what?
Yoda
18 years ago
A housemom's role depends on theclub and I have met and gotten to know several VERY HOT housemoms. In some clubs they are resposible for helping schedule the girls, making sure they change costumes and obey whatever rules the club may have about what to wear. Sometimes they are a shoulder to cry on but most dancers form their own friendships after a while so there is less of that than many would think. Most housemoms work solely for mandatory tips from th dancers. In the right club a good housemother can make $500 or more in a night.
FONDL
18 years ago
Obviously I meant to type "ever knew" not "never knew." What's especially amusing about that lady is that she had been my ATF's mother's best friend at one time and helped raise my ATF. And she was very protective of my ATF in the club. I always tipped her well but she still didn't like me because I spent too much time with my ATF. She kept a very close eye on us.
Book Guy
18 years ago
Discipline / attitude problem turns into authoritarian? Gee what a surprise. I recall the Bart Simpson episode in which he gets to be school Narc ...

It's all about self-determination for those people, that's all. Your typical redneck-hoot-n-holler -- becomes -- state-trooper.
chandler
18 years ago
Good analogy, Book Guy. Honestly, I didn't know enough about a housemom's role to appreciate that. The few I had ever seen met the old hag description, so my curiosity was limited.
FONDL
18 years ago
The only one I never knew was an older tough-looking woman who also tended bar in a little N/A club - she basically scheduled the dancers and kept them in line. She was definately someone you didn't want to mess with.
DandyDan
18 years ago
No direct experiences with one, but I remember seeing a really fat lady in the official outfit for a club once, which I thought was odd at the time, so I asked the dancer I was about to get a dance from at the time who she was and she goes "That's the housemother, she keeps our pussies clean." I don't know if I wanted to hear that then.
chandler
18 years ago
Actually, the housemom at a club I frequent is an ex-dancer who can't be much over 30, if she's that. She's come out and danced occasionally. Never a favorite of mine, but a friend of some of my faves, and popular with some guys. Girls who knew her thought it was funny that she was turning to housemom-ing, because she had been kind of a discipline and attitude problem as a dancer.
Book Guy
18 years ago
House mom = never hot. If she were, then she'd be dancing, even as the oldest most experienced woman there.
chitownlawyer
18 years ago
My experience with housemoms is that they basically function as side line coaches to the dancers--gently, or not-so-gently, keeping them out on the floor, off of the cell phone with the boyfriend, and generally producing. As we know, as Brad's. they also collect the VIP fees. At some clubs they keep the girls supplied with feminine hygiene products, cologne, etc. Frankly, I think of them as performing a function analogous to a madam in a brothel--keeping product flowing.

I've never known any hot housemoms. They have all been middle-aged or older--kind of like sorority housemoms.
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