So my girlfriend and I have been going to sc together the past few weeks. She's ready to get a private dance with me. What can I expect? Anyone have experience with this situation?? Has anyone experienced extras in this situation??
Tons of experience with my gal in the couch room and VIP. All i can say is DO IT. My gal loves it and it has led to better things, if you catch my drift. She also got just as turned on watching the damncer get me worked up. If you play it right, nit much can go wrong.
Totally disagree with bobvz. There is a lot of potential for things to go wrong if you just show up and expect it to be great. It takes a lof of communication between the two of you to make sure she feels comfortable back there. I can tell you, from a woman's perspetive, what you think you will feel and are ok with can be very different in person when it is happening. Do yourselves a favor and check out our articles on strip clubs for women. They include many pointers.
The experience greatly depends on the woman but also more on how YOU react and treat her while in the club and certainly in the private dance area. The two of you need to talk before hand about what the limits are and what is ok. If you can't talk about it you have no business doing a private dance.
Our experience has been that any extras are going to be focused on the woman - for obvious reasons.
+1 on paying attention to m00tpoint's comments and articles. My wife and I have been together quite a few times, and they've hit all the salient points.
Agreed, as usual, with mOOtpoint. Encourage your girlfriend to let you know what she thinks will be a good time. Let her do the driving in the vip room and you'll be more likely to have a lot of fun and less likely to have an ugly misunderstanding.
In a couple the woman will usually see most of the action until the WOMAN tells her she wants the attention to focus on the man. The reason is simple. She gets bigger tips if the woman has a good time. Women who enjoy the dance are more likely to agree to purchase additional dances. They are more likely to buy the more private rooms (champage/VIP) because it is much easier (in my experience) to relax when you don't have to worry about the people the next booth over. A couple in which the man enjoys the dance but the woman does not are not buying more dances or going VIP to have more personal interacion, I can promise. A woman enjoying the attention plays into the very popular male lesbian fantasy which also increases tips. But the biggest reason the stripper will usually focus on the female in the couple because it is safer.
A stripper who dances for a couple opens herself up to the risk of a significantly increased risk of "drama" if the woman does not PERCEIVE the dance in a positive way. Strippers hate drama. It puts their activities front and center with the bouncers and management which has the potential to cost them customers. Who wants a private dance with a dancer that management is now watching closely to see if there is any funny stuff going on? It costs them $$ because they are off the floor explaining what happened to management at the least and at the most the cops (the club we go to any drama on the floor gets everyone thrown out or arrested depending on the level of disruption). It potentially costs them the business of any other couples in the club because every other non-dancing female in the place is now wondering "what the hell did she do to cause that?" and is not going to trust her to dance for them in most cases. Not to mention it takes a lot of energy to deal with all that drama.
It takes a VERY special and secure dancer to entertain a couple. She has to be very good at non-verbal communication and reading body language - especially of the female in the couple. Women go to strip clubs with their man for a variety of reasons. In fact, the first time we talked about going to the SC together I backed out because I realized that part of why I wanted to go was a TEST to see if he would get aroused. What a dumb ass reason to go and would have totally blown up in our face if I had kept quiet and gone! So we talked it through and then went a month or so later after I had dealt with my issues. Many women don't or won't admit that is why they want to go. That is just ONE pitfall an entertainer may run into when dancing for couples, it is not the only one.
Oh, and fbuddy, if your primary concern when taking your g/f is about "extras" you should not take her because most certainly she will feel threatened.
Newmark, that is because you have not done it. If your primary focus is to explore something new with the person you are already intimate with it is a different ballgame than what I think most guys who frequent strip clubs seek.
So, I go back to the original question: If the concern is about getting "extras" while she is present, do not take her. It will only cause issues in that relatonship. If your goal is to enrich the relationship, invest the time beforehand.
m00tpoint is right, to a...point. *My* goal is to eventually get my wife to the point where she'll let somebody fingerbang her, or even go down on her. With the exception of a bit of under the skirt rubbing through the panties, nothing like that has happened yet, nor do I really expect it to anymore. And while the initial trip to a club was my idea, subsequent trips have been at her request, not mine. I have *never* gotten anything extra while my wife is with me, and never instigated a dance or drink with anyone without her first suggesting it. I also dont even partake of lapdances until she indicates she's OK with it, and never by myself. She *knows* what I want to happen, but she also knows that the farthest I'm going to take it is to present the opportunity. She also knows what goes on when I'm not there, which is the main reason I don't mind backing off when she is; this visit is for her, I'll have plenty of opportunity to play some other time.
I am willing to be that your wife is struggling with the "how many hands, mouths, cocks, etc touched this before it touches me" syndrome that is giving me pause as well. I have to admit, there is one dancer I would go farther with in a NY minute but it has not been an option yet. She has always been swamped with other customers when we have been in or I have chickened out. Your wife is in good company. LOL
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The experience greatly depends on the woman but also more on how YOU react and treat her while in the club and certainly in the private dance area. The two of you need to talk before hand about what the limits are and what is ok. If you can't talk about it you have no business doing a private dance.
Our experience has been that any extras are going to be focused on the woman - for obvious reasons.
Not obvious to me. Would you care to explain?
Sorry for the delay in responding.
In a couple the woman will usually see most of the action until the WOMAN tells her she wants the attention to focus on the man. The reason is simple. She gets bigger tips if the woman has a good time. Women who enjoy the dance are more likely to agree to purchase additional dances. They are more likely to buy the more private rooms (champage/VIP) because it is much easier (in my experience) to relax when you don't have to worry about the people the next booth over. A couple in which the man enjoys the dance but the woman does not are not buying more dances or going VIP to have more personal interacion, I can promise. A woman enjoying the attention plays into the very popular male lesbian fantasy which also increases tips. But the biggest reason the stripper will usually focus on the female in the couple because it is safer.
A stripper who dances for a couple opens herself up to the risk of a significantly increased risk of "drama" if the woman does not PERCEIVE the dance in a positive way. Strippers hate drama. It puts their activities front and center with the bouncers and management which has the potential to cost them customers. Who wants a private dance with a dancer that management is now watching closely to see if there is any funny stuff going on? It costs them $$ because they are off the floor explaining what happened to management at the least and at the most the cops (the club we go to any drama on the floor gets everyone thrown out or arrested depending on the level of disruption). It potentially costs them the business of any other couples in the club because every other non-dancing female in the place is now wondering "what the hell did she do to cause that?" and is not going to trust her to dance for them in most cases. Not to mention it takes a lot of energy to deal with all that drama.
It takes a VERY special and secure dancer to entertain a couple. She has to be very good at non-verbal communication and reading body language - especially of the female in the couple. Women go to strip clubs with their man for a variety of reasons. In fact, the first time we talked about going to the SC together I backed out because I realized that part of why I wanted to go was a TEST to see if he would get aroused. What a dumb ass reason to go and would have totally blown up in our face if I had kept quiet and gone! So we talked it through and then went a month or so later after I had dealt with my issues. Many women don't or won't admit that is why they want to go. That is just ONE pitfall an entertainer may run into when dancing for couples, it is not the only one.
Does that about sum it up Stiletto?
mrs m00tpoint
So, I go back to the original question: If the concern is about getting "extras" while she is present, do not take her. It will only cause issues in that relatonship. If your goal is to enrich the relationship, invest the time beforehand.
mrs m00tpoint