tuscl

Not Another "Does She Like Me" Thread!

Friday, July 22, 2011 9:17 AM
I've been going to various strip clubs (Honey's, Sugar's, Rick's, Deja Vu in Lake Forest Park) in Western WA state for 10+ years. After taking almost a year off from visiting any club I finally decided to see what I've been missing so I popped into Deja Vu in LFP 2 weeks ago (a Saturday night). After 30 minutes I was not very enthralled with the majority of dancers until one came up who I remembered from a year ago. I bought a few dances in the VIP room and we were mutually admiring each other's attributes. She liked my size, which she was able to accurately measure with her hand! I got 5-6 terrific dances from her and she even "bundled" a bit by giving me a discount. Since she clearly had me where she wanted I decided to ask about a private dance at my house later that week. To my surprise she said yes for $300/1 hour (before work) but nothing more than she would do in the club. We exchanged cell phone numbers and texted each other while still at the club. For some reason, we could not exchange texts at the time (I was having a problem with my phone). We decided to meet at my house 3 days later for the private dance (she was going to do it before work which is only about 10 miles from my house). She had my phone # so she was able to call if there were any changes. I found out what was going on with my phone's texting so that was working but she did not know this and she called to confirm our PD play date. I had been working all day and was exhausted and had not showered so when she called I cancelled the PD (I had been having second thoughts anyway) and told her that I might be in to see her on Friday. When Friday rolled around I had been having 2nd and 3rd thoughts about going in to see her so I texted to say that I couldn't make it on Friday but POSSIBLY on Saturday. I have been trying to cut costs with my cell phone and was looking at my text messaging choice: $5 for 200 TMs/month thru AT&T. As I ONLY get texts from 2 women (both strippers, I'll go into the other girl's story another time - she does not work at Deja Vu) I decided to drop the $5 TM plan and go per msg. This idea was a bust b/c when I send or receive the 25th msg I have spent $5.00!! I got so fed up with texting that I called AT&T and had 'em deactivate my text messaging - - the Deja Vu girl does not know this yet. The last text that I received from her was on Monday (7/18, when my texting was still working) and it reads: Hi. Thought u were going to see me at the club this weekend. How r u? When do i see u next? [I have not responded to her last text] To me, it is fairly obvious that she is primarily interested in me for my $$$, regardless of her feigning interest in my (1) size/appearance, and (2) friendly & respectul personality. I would like to stay friendly with her but she needs to know that I cannot (and WILL NOT) be visiting her at the club every week for dances that stray into the 3-digits. I would like to see her outside of Deja Vu but she says that she lives about 50 miles north of there so a "date" is probably out of the question. Should I see her tonight and explain that I just cannot afford her (services) and leave after just one or NO dance(s)? Will this piss her off? Hurt her feelings? Should I care??

19 comments

  • Rod8432
    •
    13 years ago
    Hesiod - You look to be new here (i.e., no other reviews/discussions), and IMHO, if you're worried about a $5/month TM bill, then dating/meeting OTC a stripper probably isn't for you. With regard to your questions: 1) Should I see her tonight and explain that I just cannot afford her (services) and leave after just one or NO dance(s)? ANSWER: Yes, be up front, see her, and simply say you've had a change of heart, but would enjoy continuing to see her ITC for dances. 2) Will this piss her off? Hurt her feelings? ANSWER: Maybe and maybe. It doesn't matter. You can't control her feelings. There'll be (or should be, if you're working your SC life appropriately) other dancers. 3) Should I care?? ANSWER: No, you're entitle to a change of heart, just as she would be if she decided she didn't want to see you OTC for some reason.
  • Hesiod
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    13 years ago
    Yep, I'm new to posting here but I have been lurking for 6+ months now. Re the $5 texting bill - I'm not so worried about the money but honestly, no one other than these 2 strippers texts me. It bugs me to pay for something that I don't need or use. I know that lots of women, not only strippers, prefer texting to talking but I do not care to pay for their comfort level (that's kinda hard-hearted, eh?). Yeah, there are INDEED other dancers out there - just none that I was interested in. She really had me wrapped around her proverbial finger.
  • harrydave
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    13 years ago
    If you don't have the cash to spend in the club, then you certainly don't have the cash to spend on OTC. But if you enjoy her company, just go into the club and tell her you backed off on the OTC thing, but that you would like a couple of dances from her. Get two, thank her and pay her. Now you are back on an even footing.
  • Alucard
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    13 years ago
    Should you care anything about this dancer? Only you know if you have any feelings about her beyond her being part of a Business transaction. 50 miles is not a long ways to go, unless you have problems with Gas costs.
  • Rod8432
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    13 years ago
    Hesiod - Yes, not preferring to pay for their "comfort level" is a little hard-hearted, and because the outlay is so minimal, penny wise and pound foolish. Having the ability to text message is a bit like springing for the cost of a decent mail box or a computer to receive email. Yes, it represents a small cost, but consider it part of your communications infrastructure investment so you can be a full-on player in society. And whether a stripper or nor, we all appreciate it when others make it easy for us to communicate with them.
  • Hesiod
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    13 years ago
    Rod - Thanks for your comments and insight. Regrettably, I have never felt like nor been a "full-on player in society" - not a player at all really. It is pretty ludicrous to have a smartphone and not be able to get a text msg, I will admit. It just bugs me that 2 strippers are the only people who seem to have a need to use texting as a means of communication.
  • runrdude
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    13 years ago
    If you have a smartphone, use Google Voice for Android or textfree for iphone. The cost is zero and it also adds another layer of insulation between you and the girl.
  • Hesiod
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    13 years ago
    Runrdude - I'm going to try and GV up and running this weekend. I tried it before but it wouldn't let me text anything so a friend is coming over to have a look. There IS an Android app for Textfree (I just found it today).
  • Rod8432
    •
    13 years ago
    Hesiod - You're welcome, and I think my point is that texting represents a very viable way to communicate these days, so making some accommodation to send/receive messages - whether through your wireless carrier or other source (free or not) - is a wise move. There's a chicken and egg things going on, as well; because no one will send you messages until you have it, you must first have it to get messages. In any case, good luck w/your stripper dilemma.
  • gsv
    •
    13 years ago
    I've been in similar situations. Remember that in 99% of cases no matter what the girl says - she doesn't "miss you" and probably doesn't care on a personal level as to whether you're in the club or not (at least not very much). It's all about the money from them, and once they do realize that you aren't going to come in very frequently, they will probably stop texting you as well. I know of a dancer who has the phone numbers of all her regulars along with what appears to be a dedicated phone just for work. She texts all of them frequently saying that she misses them and wants them to come in, etc. To my surprise, this does round up a very consistent amount of customers for her on the days that she works (only like 3 days a week). At this NYC club, she often takes home in excess of $1k in a night. It helps that she is a beautiful girl and will sometimes go the "extra mile" if you know what I mean, but her business plan is quite good to cultivate regulars. And I'm not surprised if other girls are adopting similar methods. Don't get caught up in this for anything more than it is - business.
  • Hesiod
    •
    13 years ago
    GSV - Very wise words indeed. Fwiw, it is fairly apparent to me that she doesn't "miss me" and probably doesn't care on a personal level as to whether you're in the club or not (at least not very much). If she did care, even a little, then she would've called by now. But then I have the dilemma of getting my texting fixed (remember it wasn't working when we tried texting each other in the club 2 weeks ago), replying to her TMs and hinting that I would be in to see her, and then getting fed up with texting and deactivating it. So she probably thinks that I'm just ignoring her texts, which in a way is true as I can't receive ANY texts at this time. I can see where she would be fed up with me by now! I dunno, what's the point of going to see her tonite only to tell her that the OTC dance is probably off and I can only afford a dance or two. The minute I step foot in the door I'm "committed" to spending a minimum of $40 ($20 admission, $20 for 1 dance), for what: to be polite and tell her that I can't afford her?! There were no other dancers that I was interested in when I was last there, and this was at 10 on a Saturday night (admittedly, I am picky)! She seemed like a nice girl but I know that it is primarily about the Benjamins for her.
  • Stiletto25
    •
    13 years ago
    Hesiod, we're in the same neck of the woods. Dancers are primarily interested in your money, yes, even if we may seem impressed by your dick (and maybe we really are). It's just our job and some of us enjoy it. If I'm reading your post correctly, it seems like you're overthinking. When you see her next, there is no need to explain yourself unless it would make you feel better. One dance is better than none. If she asks why you're not spending more, just say "i can't afford any more but ill be back when I have more money". She's a dancer. She gets this all the time, trust me. As for texting and calling, I will dissect this for you. If you give her your number , she figures you gave it to her so she can get In touch with you when she would like to see you. You come in on your schedule, then when she's having a slow night or week, she calls you for back up. You are not required to respond to her calls, she's not your wife. If you want to, then fine, if not, blow her off. It's not like she's going to hold it against you. She knows you have a life outside of her AND she figures you know the game. You could ignore this girl for a year and the next time you come in telling her you want a bunch of dances, she'll smile and give you what you want because you have money. That's what she wanted all along. This isn't as bad as it sounds. It's just the nature of the business. If you enjoy her services then keep buying as you can afford it.
  • TcVegas
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    13 years ago
    Stiletto25, your contributions to this site are insightful and definitely make it more interesting to read.
  • Hesiod
    •
    13 years ago
    Hi Stiletto - I'm in Kenmore. You're correct, I am overthinking this -- the curse of being an OCD Libra, I guess. I am a tiny bit concerned about not responding to her TMs; it just seems rude to me [not to respond] but I guess "no harm, no foul" might apply in this case. I also sort of talked myself into believing that she actually cared for me but now it seems like I was just a bit of string for her to wrap around her magic fingers...
  • SammyGold
    •
    13 years ago
    Way too much drama here. Go or don't go. Use the phone or fuck it. Just go and have a drink already. Get a dance if you want or not. No more OTC for you though - you're your own pain in the ass.
  • Stiletto25
    •
    13 years ago
    @tcvegas- thanks! @hesiod- I know a little of kemmore but my home base is farther south. You feel bad not responding because you're a good guy and in "the real world" it would be rude not to respond. If you are a guy and there is a pretty girl texting you and you enjoy her company, it would be rude. It would put her off to not get a response from you. But luckily, depending on how you want this to go, youre dealing with a dancer/customer relationship. You're not going to hurt her feelings.
  • Club_Goer_Seattle
    •
    13 years ago
    @Stiletto25: Your advice is always so compassionate, that I consider you the "Dear Abby" of TUSCL !!!
  • Alucard
    •
    13 years ago
    We all can benefit from her perspective on our hobby.
  • gatorfan
    •
    13 years ago
    But does she like you? I didn't see an answer
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