Getting stiffed by a customer is one of the hazzards of being a stripper. Damn near every stripper I have ever talked to says "it happens". For a few of them it results in a change of their policy.Pay upfront.
Does any one have a job that never makes them rant?
To answer your question, probably not, but this website has little to do with those jobs, which is why I posted this. Also, it has to do with entitlement and people forgetting that stripping is a job.
lol wow.. well im glad i dont fit the discription of the guy shes talking about. not qwuite in my 30s yet, im already bald (shaved)lol, not white and not chubby..whew imagine my relief lol..
i guess im spoiled in my area because most of the clubs around here lap dances are $10 and a couple places $5
i know ive had confusion on dance prices before (dancers english wasnt good) so i i didnt have enough money to pay for the dance but i was nobel enough to go to the atm and get her the rest (that $7.50 fee hurt though)
lol @ lil wayne being her one eception .. thats kinda sad
going beyond getting stiffed by that one customer, many of her other comments show a bitterness towards men. no doubt some of it is deserved but she really comes off as a complaining bitch. maybe she's not the special goddess that she thinks she is and maybe the root of some of the things she's complaining about can be fixed by changing her attitude or finding another line of work.
I don't exactly see it as a "spectacular" article; but it was pretty good, I guess. Meh ...
I do agree with her, that there's a way to be an appreciative and polite customer. But I disagree with her assumption that the entire strip-club industry is as "clean" as she implies that her experiences have been. She seems to say "don't touch" on every line that she's discussing a lap-dance, thus congratulating herself that she's really a good girl even though she's a stripper because she doesn't let her customers do gropey-gropey. But it's my experience that about 95% of the lap-dances that are going on in the good ol' USA are high-contact -- meaning, the girl straddles you, rubs her tits in your face, maybe lets you suck on her nipples, certainly lets you fondle her breasts and ass. The attitude of, "Don't touch my tits, asshole! This isn't a whore-house!" is a preposterously false facade, since an asshole doesn't have to be in a whore-house to have reasonable expectation of tit-touching.
Similarly, there are a few other red flags that suggest to me that the author isn't REALLY working in what most TUSCL members would call a "typical strip club." For example, she describes the bachelor party as tipping well, having fun, acting polite, and looking kind of cute. Well, that's a bachelor party that I've never seen, and I'll bet most strippers haven't either. Nearly all bachelor parties consist mostly of men who don't usually attend strip clubs, men who mostly are uncomfortable around naked women, men who over-indulge in alcohol and gropey-gropey on the one night in question. The average bachelor party is highly unlikely to be a source of good revenue for a stripper except in terms of (a) sheer volume (every dumb-ass from Dubuque in the entire crew wants to buy his buddy a dance, and his buddies all want to buy him a dance); (b) sheer volume of alcohol consumed (dumb customer is spendy customer).
Additionally, she implies that there's just not going to be sex, not to be had for any amount of money, at a strip club. This is an idiotic comment. If she doesn't fuck for money, then it's because she hasn't seen an economically difficult time in her life or she hasn't yet been stripping long enough to have gotten desperate or to have fallen off her particular "good girl" wagon. Every woman has a price; most women set their prices on the basis of the women around them who form their social and gregarious context; and 100% of all attractive young women are biologically driven to try to climb to the top of that contextual group and to demonstrate their superiority by means of greater control over men which, in a strip club context, will nearly always imply greater income derived from men. Sitting around the back room counting twenties, don't mind me, ho hum, here's another thousand that I just COULDN'T help making this evening Gloria ... soon enough, she's going to stop considering herself holier than the rest of us.
In my opinion, this article depends on an unreasonably sanitized version of the real American sex-related industry experience. Everyone in that industry in the USA is about one step away from skid-row, and none (well, only 1%) have really "chosen" it as a career. Nearly all of them have fallen into it, mostly as a near-desperation near-last resort, and have then continued with it, growing more comfortable with the outrageous behaviors as they become inured to them. To the contrary, the author portrays herself as someone who considers her time at the club to be her regular job -- I bet she even claims that she arrives on time! and does her laundry right after getting off work! and phones the sitter to check on the kids ... It's all a middle-class fantasy, in which the poor little girl with no other decent prospects, but the good luck to still have a fairly skinny body (which is, frankly, a rarity in America) and a fairly hot ass and a pretty-enough face, decides that the princess inside her isn't dead yet, some prince-charming some day will indeed come give her a house in the suburbs, and in the meanwhile, she can afford to buy her own slightly used probably stolen Jeep Dakota Rambler SUV with Starbucks emblem just to prove she's still capable of comparing herself to the "nice" girls from her High School class.
Oh class, yes, that reminds me. The author is spot-on, when she mentions that most work in America is "gendered and classed." First, the hyper-urbane-ism: I really hate the grammatical usage, creating a verb from an adjective -- what next? when I ship a package, can I say it was "browned" for cheap or "oranged and blued" overnight? -- and it stinks of under-educated-but-smart, the sort of person who knows that the noises of post-structuralist critics can easily be mimicked. So, she's over-talking and using bigger-than-necessary words, words that seem to come from some intellectual context like maybe Sociology or Post-Modernist Feminism, in order to sound fancy. But, that can be excused, since she's, after all, a stripper defending herself. I'll forgive it. :)
Second, on the subject of "classed": I think she's totally right. In the USA, we have a class-system of working opportunities. Those of us who have gotten caught in the lower-class portion, know exactly what she's talking about, though she doesn't elaborate too much. But it's pretty clear that girls who are college graduates from major private schools aren't going to be stripping as a career, and that if they do indulge in it, it's because it's a youthful indiscretion, a lark, something to prove to themselves that they're capable of being wild and crazy. Anyone who has even the remotest chance of attending Medical or Law School in her future is highly unlikely to be stripping. If she finds that she needs the money, she can do it for a little bit, but she likely can make roughly the same amount of money for a lot fewer hassles and a lot less risk of legal and physically violent reprisal by taking up a receptionist position. That's girls from "fancy" colleges -- the Bryn Mawr / Tulane / Stanford / Reed category.
But what about most of America? We send our little ladies off to big state schools, or to Your Local Community College. They try to finish a major, or to get a certification in Legal Aesthetician and Medical Assistant Studies Toward Criminology of the Optometrist. They kind of get a degree, kind of get an education, mostly mark some time and add a few classes to their transcript but just don't break in to the ranks of the idler richer girls from Bryn Mawr and Tulane, above. For these less lucky ones, the paychecks don't come in afterwards, the tuition bill is due, the loans are insurmountable and the lenders are predatory, the social system does not really make the whole "independent young woman" fantasy possible. We show them TV sit-coms about "Friends" who live in awesome apartments and have "Sex and the City," people who seem to have little trouble setting themselves up with interesting jobs that involve hanging out at coffee shops all day or writing cool blogs on pretty little I-Mac computers and being delightfully well dressed. So off they go to the nearest big city where the receptionist position simply isn't available to them.
These are the girls who thought they were middle-class but who turn out to be lower-class, as far as they employment prospects go. I sympathize. In fact, I kind of like America's "lower class" (not meaning, people who are low-class in their levels of politeness) especially when those people are go-getters, accomplished, confident, capable, and cagey enough to succeed at the essential competition that is life in the USA, without letting it grind them completely down into nothing more than craven money-hungry manipulators. Sometimes strippers turn out to be just the craven money-hungry manipulators whom we all love to hate, but more often than not, it's the middle-class women who are the worst in that category; and the girls who went to Bryn Mawr or somewhere else fancy are busy getting the viable employed men to marry them.
So what I'm noticing is the "divide" in America. It's often based on class, often the class lines are roughly parallel to race lines, and often the promise of the American dream, i.e. that promise which is reserved mostly for the middle class college educated set, turns out to be a false promise when anyone outside of a rather wealthy minority tries to implement it in their own lives.
Frankly, I think there's likely a great opportunity to "translate" people who have gotten fed up with wage-slavery, into the new America's "knowledge workers." I'm working toward becoming a lawyer. I don't intend to work FOR other people for very long, and business is booming. A stripper can manage a damn website, of course, can't she? Well, hell, I figger when I hire a front-desk receptionist, I won't be hiring anyone who has any long-term plans for being a well-educated carefully trained invested-in-being-a receptionist. No, I want some perky tits. I won't be asking her to do anything but type some shit and be friendly and maybe show some cleavage and make my clients glad they came into the office. I'll be doing all the work, whether or not I have a competent receptionist. Her job will be to look pretty, or to not exist; why try to get someone who can help with the work itesel, when it's basically impossible for that person to get involved in the work because of confidentiality reasons and therefore there's no helping to be done? If the girl also, I find out later, happens to be someone who runs a little side business that involves turning tricks or setting up lunchtime liasions or simply finding apartments for her former co-workers from the sex-related industry, all the better.
Ah, life's a peach, ain't it. Just keep your eye on the class-lines. Right there. Right between her top two buttons of her blouse, where the left class mushes up agains the right class ... :)
LOL. I have to laugh because not long ago we posted a question thread about tipping on this site. Honestly, the majority of the answers we received shocked me. Seems that, at least the ones who responded to our thread, the majority on here tip pretty shitty or else we just are too nice.
For instance, last night we visited our favorite club because it was Porn Star Weekend and we wanted to see Alexis Texas. (exceptionally hot woman, btw, with a great attitude and very nice stage show) Our favorite entertainer was not present so we were having a nice time with our newest "friend." We had just agreed to go back for some private dances because they were 2/$50 instead of the normal $30 each. We got back into the room where the bouncer told our dancer she was not allowed to begin any dances because the star was about to take the stage and the agreement with her was no one would be in the private rooms while she performed. So we went back up front, enjoyed her show and tipped at the stage.
After the show, our dancer was up in the rotation and went to do her time on stage. When she left, we all were under the understanding that when she returned we would resume our original plan of getting the private dances. In the meantime, my husband's pager went off and there was a network problem that needed his immediate attention. He went to the car to call in and let them know he was aware of the issue and would be looking at it in approximately 15 minutes while I waited for the stripper to come back from freshening up after her dance. I explained what happened and then tipped her $40. She spent the majority of her evening with us and we also bought her 3-4 drinks and some cheese sticks. (Yeah, wife was hungry and we believe it is rude to eat in front of someone and not offer.)
That is why dancers tell us we are "their favorite couple", why they come by to talk to us even when we are sitting with another dancer and why they seek us out when there are specials. We also ask, "do you have any rules?" whem we go back for the first time and make sure to tell them any that we also have. (Mainly that we have a code word and if she hears one of us use it she needs to stop what she is doing because of us feels uncomfortable or has a problem)
I laugh at the article because I am sure that those who do not tip strippers well probably don't tip anyone well. I bet most of them don't tip the person who cuts their hair or give monetary gifts at Christmas to the person who does their lawnwork or even a card to their mailcarrier.
Entitlement. Exactly. Strippers seem to think that they're entitled. Just because they're dancing on stage, they're entitled to a tip. Why? Tipping is paying extra for extra performance. NOT paying money because the boss refuses to pay a decent wage. It's not my fault that the boss is an a-hole. And BTW, I'm not there to make a stripper have fun. I'm freakin' tired of dancers who expect customers to do this and that. Sit at the stage. Tip a lot. Pay attention when I'm on stage. Buy me a drink. Be fun, even if you've had a bad day and want to just chill for a bit. I'M PAYING YOU, not the other way around. Treat me well, and if you do a good job I'll empty my pockets. Over the years I've been going to clubs, I've only known a handful of girls who "get it". If you don't like your job, so something else. Otherwise, be the best you can be. Which means don't hate your customers, and talk about them behind their backs, and have a certain set of rules they need to follow for you to be happy. Spectacular article? Not even close. It's a angry stripper who doesn't like her customers and should probably be in another line of business.
Lucky she's an independent contractor stripper. She appears to be offended by almost everything; she'd be a shit employee, and most real contractors must posess a demonstrable skill.
Waste of bandwidth.
The phrase "man bites dog" describes a phenomenon in journalism in which an unusual, infrequent event is more likely to be reported as news than an ordinary, everyday occurrence (such as "Dog bites man"). The news media generally consider an event more newsworthy if there is something unusual about it; a commonplace event is unlikely to be taken as newsworthy. The result is that rare events often appear in headlines while common events rarely do, making the rare events seem more common than they are. The pattern is also described in the proverbs "You never read about a plane that did not crash" and "You don't hear about the laws that a politician did not break."
There are plenty of comments on this site about strippers scamming customers. I guess it can happen to strippers too.
I liked this article. I found the comments under the article by various women even more interesting.
A lot of dancers feel the way the author does, they just don't write about it or tell you about it because its not conducive to good customer relations.
I don't think this was an attack on all customers. For example, I have felt the way the author does on more than one occasion and I love men. I like my customers. I appreciate that they are in the club just like I'm sure they appreciate the fact that I'm dancing.
A dancers experiences aren't all peachy, though, and I think the author touched on some annoyances that dancers encounter with a given few.
1) Hey you over there, holding that one dollar bill in your hand with a death grip and waving it around at me like it's the fucking deed to Trump Towers... what the fuck do you want me to do, grow another pussy?? It's a fuckin' dollar, put it down on the tiprail already.
2) Men that come into the club for a lapdance with NO underwear or boxers and thin-ass, nylon shorts, so we slip and slide on your hard-on (which always feel like a sharpie pen). Ew! I don't even bother dancing with you nasty fucks anymore.
3) You with the thick-ass jeans--this was an impromptu visit, eh?
4) Don't pull my thong up during a dance and ask me if that felt good. It does NOT FEEL GOOD.
5) Hey you loser, counting all your bills to me after the dance, all $20 in ones, and rubbing your fingers between each one to make sure you are giving me just that one dollar. Yes, you.
6) No I will not let you just "slip it in real quick" for 50 more bucks. If you're going to proposition me, at least don't insult my worth.
7) Stop asking me if my tits are real. There are as real as my affection for you.
8) If you cum in your pants, you have to tip me an extra $100 for being a lame-ass who can cum from just a lapdance.
9) Stop asking me out. You're a smelly, fat loser and the only reason I'm smiling and cooing at you is because I want your money. Outside of the club I wouldn't even fart your way.
10) Stop bitching at me about the goddamn two drink minimum. First of all your breath stinks, you have a piece of salami stuck to your goat-tee and you look like Jay Leno. Secondly, I don't give a shit.
11) Don't bitch at me about the $8 non-alchoholic beer either. Hide a bottle of Jack in your coat pocket next time like everyone else does.
12) My horniness is in direct proportion to your income.
13) No, you CAN'T SMOKE. Dumb. Ass.
14) Boys, don't sit in the front row with your homeboys and act all engrossed in some deep conversation (knowing damn well you ain't talking 'bout shit) during a girls performance because you want to look like you're too "cool" to notice the hot, naked girl in front of you.
15) DON'T SIT IN THE FRONT ROW IF YOU ARE NOT GOING TO TIP. Fer chrissakes!!!!!!!!!!!
16) Dumb ass, don't ask me, "so what do you guys do when you're on your period?" Answer: I lap dance only with guys in dark pants.
17) STOP trying to grab my tits!!!!!!!!! That's extra.
18) SHOWER FIRST, you nasty fuck!
19) If you don't tip me, I'm going to call your wife.
20) I had a feeling you weren't going to tip me, so I took extra care to rub my lip gloss on your collar and wear extra glitter lotion before our dance.
21) Hey cheap-asses: please don't come to my work. Just stay home and jack off to reruns of "I love Genie" instead. It will save us a both a lot of unpleasantry.
22) Stop asking me why I do this job and get all analytical on me. For the MONEY you moron, that's why. Duh.
23) No seriously, my real name is Vixen Blue.
24) NO, I will not take a dime sac of weed for payment. I can tell it's oregano anyway you sick mutherfucker!
25) Sorry, I don't do that. Ask the ugly girl with the overbite and the black roots over there by the bar.
26) It is not okay for you to bounce me on your cock like a baby on a knee. Not okay.
27) Stop complaining about how short the song was. It felt like the fucking maxi-single to me.
28) Yes I will fuck you, but only for 10 grand. More if you're ugly. So basically, more.
29) DO NOT come into the club looking for a girlfriend/date. DO. NOT.
30) I don't care if you're cute and/or Brad Pitt's stunt double. I do not give free lapdances. Cute don't pay the rent.
31) Girls--what's with the pole smell? Can we do a little hygiene check? Nothing than worse than twirling around a pole and getting a whiff of stale pussy.
32) Girls--stop lip-syncing to the song you're dancing to on stage. Especially if you don't quite know all the words.
33) Girls--if your toes curl and hang over your platforms a la' Fred Flinstone, you need to go up a size.
34) Girls--drowning yourself in Angel perfume is just as bad if not worse than the BO you're trying to cover.
35) Hey DJ! You suck!
36) Girls--may I suggest complete sobriety before getting tatted up? Tattoos should be meaningful, or at least semi-meaningful, or at least semi semi-meaningful. That fucking smurf on your ass is lame.
37) Girls--some songs should not be stripped to. Please. No Disney soundtracks (you know who you are), Sade, Bjork, or Aaron Carter. PLEASE.
#2- I have a customer that always wears nylon shorts with no underwear. He's really sweet though, plus he comes into the club 3x a week, same time, and only buys from me. Under those circumstances I'll gladly deal with the "peaking weanie" thank you.
#6- all the time.
#13- I have worked in a club with a smelly VIP. Guys would light up cigarettes, take a few drags, and wave it around. I didn't have the heart to freak out. The smell would kill anyone's mood.
#16- Cut your tampon strings and stuff the remainder as far up as possible. Getting the string caught on a zipper isn't cool. I've never seen a customer run for the door so fast.
And last but not least #31. And forget the pole, how about a guys crotch. When I get on my knees( yes I do and no I don't give BJ's), I don't want to smell the bad hygiene of the dancer before me.
The article is a rant that any employee in xx company could write about their job. IME employees that rant about their jobs like that also don't like their jobs. Time to do something else.
Tips are earned. They are discretionary per individual. They are not entitlements.
No doubt some guys (not my fellow Tusclers of course) treat girls very badly and that's inexcusable. Equally as badly are the girls that rip off guy's by giving short dances, bad dances etc or failing to 'deliver' promised or implied 'action'. It is annoying when this happens but it's par for the course and goes with the territory.
I thought the article was right on point. And I don't think it should be over analyzed. Psychologically speaking it's always good to hear what's really in the entertainer's mind. Thanks for sharing it, kumasdaisy!
That article should be titled, "Tales from a Burnt Out Stripper."
That article went way beyond not getting paid. In my experience, once they start ranting about every stupid little thing that guys sometimes do then they are on their way out. She sounds like just another young burnout that can't handle the job.
I'm afraid I'm going to have to agree with rick to a great extent there, Stiletto. I've met a fair few strippers, and that type of elaboration on a theme isn't done by one who's not near the end of her run as a stripper, whether that's because of burn-out, better opportunity, or simply circumstances. Sure, you, and the other dancers here will look at that list, and can probably think of examples of *every* single one of her gripes, but you wouldn't have actually taken the time to *compile* the list unless you're getting so fed up that it's just a matter of "when", rather than "if".
A dancer who is more or less satisfied with her lot is still going to be able to overlook many of them on any given occasion, because there are enough decent experiences to let her put the bad ones out of her mind. It's only when the decline sets in that the bad ones start to overwhelm the decent ones, to the point they prompt the creation of a list like that.
And no, I'm not saying Daisy is burnt out, though she might be close if she's willing to both post the article and label it "spectacular". It's equally likely, however, that it just caught her eye.
I'll still disagree. No amount of explanation or reasoning by me will make my point completely understandable. We just can't completely step in eachother's shoes, customer and dancer. So despite what a male customer says, I'm right. And I think an article like the one above shares the feelings that all dancers, new and old, have had. Whether they should hang it up, or not
I think georgmicrodong nailed it. See, I don't think anyone is arguing that these aren't legitimate gripes...I am sure every dancer will experience most if not all of that. But to and post that list and do so in that way, well, that shows some obvious frustration with the job.
Exactly. Gripes that every dancer has at one time or another. The whole "she needs to hang it up thing", though, is ridiculous. It just is.
Unfortunately, by the time I'm able to post again, this thread will probably be old news as I am heading out of town. I had a fun time with this thread though.
No, I wasn't trying to say the gripes aren't legitimate, only that Rick was probably right about the "burn out" comment. Taking the time to compile that list, with that level of frustration in her "voice", is, if not as *sure* sign, then damned close, that she's burned out. It's also possible that she's *not* burned out, just ready to leave the business, and that this is just a bridge burning exercise, or a way to categorize for herself why she's leaving. I wouldn't have expected to see that much frustration if the latter were the case.
And Rick didn't say she should hang it up, only that she appeared to be on her way out. "Hanging it up" is one option, of course, but there are others.
In my opinion with any new customer she doesn't dance for all the time, she should have explained what the price was before doing any dances. That is just routine customer service any business does before they take orders or do a service for someone. She wanted to bitch because she did a poor job and didn't explain it to a new customer. Of course some customers are going to act stupid on occasion, there are always a few problem customers with any business. Most businesses have policies to not anger customers or the customer is always right or have teams of people to address customer complaints. When it comes to stripping, there is none of that as far as I know in general. In fact it is more common to see rants such as the one posted. It was a well written rant though.
Maybe someone should write a customer rant about stuck up dancers and bitches who happen to work in a strip club. No offense intended to anyone who visits this site.
Someone could piece one together from several rants on here.
Like this, a customer rant about strippers who demand tips
So you think you deserve a tip from me? I was sitting in the back of the club minding my own business where I could barely even see any dancers and never saw you since I only arrived a short while ago. Yet you come over with your friend and bug me to death about getting a dance when I said I wasn't interested. You start intrusively running your fingers over me trying to turn me on and waste another 5 minutes of my time before asking for a dance again after I already said no. After all this you ask for a tip? You wasted my time, did not take no for an answer and now you want a tip on top of that? You don't deserve any tip except to hear that you should just leave a customer alone when he says no the first time unless you want to negotiate a better offer to him. If he says no again, just leave quietly.
I could go on, if the customer decides to give you and the other dancer a dollar tip to leave quietly but you think that is being cheap only getting a dollar per girl (2 dancers), you're really fucked up in the head. Leave quietly if you want any hope of getting money from me that night. Instead you tell me I need that dollar more than you do and give it back to me? WTF did you ask me for a tip in the first place? I gave you something to get rid of you quietly but the bitch in you wanted to complain anyway. After wasting my time and getting me a bit riled up, I decide to move locations since I felt like a target in that corner of the club. Well guess what, you find me again and try all over again a few minutes later. By that time, I believe you are just a stupid bitch and wish you were never working there and if I was a new customer, I might never return to that club again because of you.
I could go on with other customer rants. Rants can be fun.
As with any customer service job, workers are going to be upset about certain customers and customers will be dissatisfied at times with the people providing the customer service. I don't think its fair to discount what the stripper says just as its not fair for the anyone to discount what the SC hobbyist says. Both are entitled to their opinions and only they know what is going on in their head at that time. The problem is when people generalize and make it personal, that's when others get offended. Its better to take it with a grain of salt and move on.
WTF is going on in your head that you think getting a dance from me is worth arguing with me about? I said no, no thanks, not right now, multiple times. Don't you know when to leave? You prefer to argue with me for over 15 minutes? This is a strip club not a debate fight club about why you are entitled to get a dance from your target. Just leave peacefully and ask me later. I probably won't leave right away if I just got there which I did in that case. Instead you get me so riled up, I'll leave the table I was sitting at and go elsewhere. I was relaxed and in a happy mood before you decided to argue with me for 15 minutes. So the club is dead and you feel desperate? It doesn't matter, leave after I say no unless you're trying to negotiate down on price.
To those dancers who want to argue and pull on my arms or drag me to the dance room, what the heck are you thinking? Dragging me somewhere isn't going to make me want to get a dance from you. What do you think this place is? A strip club or a Korean massage parlor where two girls routinely gang up on me and force me into the building?
Note: My experiences may not be typical for everyone.
Stiletto, the average life cycle of a stripper is under 4 years. Do you know how many multiples of that number that some of us have been dealing with strippers? Now I know that you probably view yourself as an onion with many layers and that customers couldn't possibly understand all that is you, but I've been dealing with strippers long before you got into the business and will be doing it long after you burn out.
I (and I am sure many other guys around here) have seen the cycle play out more times than I can count, enough to tell you that thin skinned strippers are invariably short lived ones.
Yes, all or most strippers will gripe about crappy customers, just as all or most customers will gripe about crappy dancers. My point was that there are only a few people on either side of that equation who will bother to take the time and expend the effort to actually take time out of their day, time that could otherwise be spent with family, friends, household chores, errands and various other tasks and activities that comprise the lives of those who are moderately happy with their lot, to compile a freakin' list. And *that* group of people, IME, is made up, in large part, by the burn outs on one side, and the really fucked over on the other.
Nothing about that was intended to suggest that nobody else can identify with her, or that she wasn't really having those problems, or that nobody else has had problems with customers or anything like that.
manhattan, layers my ass. This is classic. When they start losing their minds over the same dumb things that inexpereinced jerkoffs say over and over in the clubs then they are in crash and burn mode. If she had written this in a humurous tone I might have agreed, but this article is filled with anger and disgust over a lot of things that seasoned dancers with the right attitude would consider kinda' goofy and par for the course.
Nope, that plane is going down. She's too tightly wound and takes herself way too seriously.
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Does any one have a job that never makes them rant?
i guess im spoiled in my area because most of the clubs around here lap dances are $10 and a couple places $5
i know ive had confusion on dance prices before (dancers english wasnt good) so i i didnt have enough money to pay for the dance but i was nobel enough to go to the atm and get her the rest (that $7.50 fee hurt though)
lol @ lil wayne being her one eception .. thats kinda sad
I do agree with her, that there's a way to be an appreciative and polite customer. But I disagree with her assumption that the entire strip-club industry is as "clean" as she implies that her experiences have been. She seems to say "don't touch" on every line that she's discussing a lap-dance, thus congratulating herself that she's really a good girl even though she's a stripper because she doesn't let her customers do gropey-gropey. But it's my experience that about 95% of the lap-dances that are going on in the good ol' USA are high-contact -- meaning, the girl straddles you, rubs her tits in your face, maybe lets you suck on her nipples, certainly lets you fondle her breasts and ass. The attitude of, "Don't touch my tits, asshole! This isn't a whore-house!" is a preposterously false facade, since an asshole doesn't have to be in a whore-house to have reasonable expectation of tit-touching.
Similarly, there are a few other red flags that suggest to me that the author isn't REALLY working in what most TUSCL members would call a "typical strip club." For example, she describes the bachelor party as tipping well, having fun, acting polite, and looking kind of cute. Well, that's a bachelor party that I've never seen, and I'll bet most strippers haven't either. Nearly all bachelor parties consist mostly of men who don't usually attend strip clubs, men who mostly are uncomfortable around naked women, men who over-indulge in alcohol and gropey-gropey on the one night in question. The average bachelor party is highly unlikely to be a source of good revenue for a stripper except in terms of (a) sheer volume (every dumb-ass from Dubuque in the entire crew wants to buy his buddy a dance, and his buddies all want to buy him a dance); (b) sheer volume of alcohol consumed (dumb customer is spendy customer).
Additionally, she implies that there's just not going to be sex, not to be had for any amount of money, at a strip club. This is an idiotic comment. If she doesn't fuck for money, then it's because she hasn't seen an economically difficult time in her life or she hasn't yet been stripping long enough to have gotten desperate or to have fallen off her particular "good girl" wagon. Every woman has a price; most women set their prices on the basis of the women around them who form their social and gregarious context; and 100% of all attractive young women are biologically driven to try to climb to the top of that contextual group and to demonstrate their superiority by means of greater control over men which, in a strip club context, will nearly always imply greater income derived from men. Sitting around the back room counting twenties, don't mind me, ho hum, here's another thousand that I just COULDN'T help making this evening Gloria ... soon enough, she's going to stop considering herself holier than the rest of us.
In my opinion, this article depends on an unreasonably sanitized version of the real American sex-related industry experience. Everyone in that industry in the USA is about one step away from skid-row, and none (well, only 1%) have really "chosen" it as a career. Nearly all of them have fallen into it, mostly as a near-desperation near-last resort, and have then continued with it, growing more comfortable with the outrageous behaviors as they become inured to them. To the contrary, the author portrays herself as someone who considers her time at the club to be her regular job -- I bet she even claims that she arrives on time! and does her laundry right after getting off work! and phones the sitter to check on the kids ... It's all a middle-class fantasy, in which the poor little girl with no other decent prospects, but the good luck to still have a fairly skinny body (which is, frankly, a rarity in America) and a fairly hot ass and a pretty-enough face, decides that the princess inside her isn't dead yet, some prince-charming some day will indeed come give her a house in the suburbs, and in the meanwhile, she can afford to buy her own slightly used probably stolen Jeep Dakota Rambler SUV with Starbucks emblem just to prove she's still capable of comparing herself to the "nice" girls from her High School class.
Oh class, yes, that reminds me. The author is spot-on, when she mentions that most work in America is "gendered and classed." First, the hyper-urbane-ism: I really hate the grammatical usage, creating a verb from an adjective -- what next? when I ship a package, can I say it was "browned" for cheap or "oranged and blued" overnight? -- and it stinks of under-educated-but-smart, the sort of person who knows that the noises of post-structuralist critics can easily be mimicked. So, she's over-talking and using bigger-than-necessary words, words that seem to come from some intellectual context like maybe Sociology or Post-Modernist Feminism, in order to sound fancy. But, that can be excused, since she's, after all, a stripper defending herself. I'll forgive it. :)
Second, on the subject of "classed": I think she's totally right. In the USA, we have a class-system of working opportunities. Those of us who have gotten caught in the lower-class portion, know exactly what she's talking about, though she doesn't elaborate too much. But it's pretty clear that girls who are college graduates from major private schools aren't going to be stripping as a career, and that if they do indulge in it, it's because it's a youthful indiscretion, a lark, something to prove to themselves that they're capable of being wild and crazy. Anyone who has even the remotest chance of attending Medical or Law School in her future is highly unlikely to be stripping. If she finds that she needs the money, she can do it for a little bit, but she likely can make roughly the same amount of money for a lot fewer hassles and a lot less risk of legal and physically violent reprisal by taking up a receptionist position. That's girls from "fancy" colleges -- the Bryn Mawr / Tulane / Stanford / Reed category.
But what about most of America? We send our little ladies off to big state schools, or to Your Local Community College. They try to finish a major, or to get a certification in Legal Aesthetician and Medical Assistant Studies Toward Criminology of the Optometrist. They kind of get a degree, kind of get an education, mostly mark some time and add a few classes to their transcript but just don't break in to the ranks of the idler richer girls from Bryn Mawr and Tulane, above. For these less lucky ones, the paychecks don't come in afterwards, the tuition bill is due, the loans are insurmountable and the lenders are predatory, the social system does not really make the whole "independent young woman" fantasy possible. We show them TV sit-coms about "Friends" who live in awesome apartments and have "Sex and the City," people who seem to have little trouble setting themselves up with interesting jobs that involve hanging out at coffee shops all day or writing cool blogs on pretty little I-Mac computers and being delightfully well dressed. So off they go to the nearest big city where the receptionist position simply isn't available to them.
These are the girls who thought they were middle-class but who turn out to be lower-class, as far as they employment prospects go. I sympathize. In fact, I kind of like America's "lower class" (not meaning, people who are low-class in their levels of politeness) especially when those people are go-getters, accomplished, confident, capable, and cagey enough to succeed at the essential competition that is life in the USA, without letting it grind them completely down into nothing more than craven money-hungry manipulators. Sometimes strippers turn out to be just the craven money-hungry manipulators whom we all love to hate, but more often than not, it's the middle-class women who are the worst in that category; and the girls who went to Bryn Mawr or somewhere else fancy are busy getting the viable employed men to marry them.
So what I'm noticing is the "divide" in America. It's often based on class, often the class lines are roughly parallel to race lines, and often the promise of the American dream, i.e. that promise which is reserved mostly for the middle class college educated set, turns out to be a false promise when anyone outside of a rather wealthy minority tries to implement it in their own lives.
Frankly, I think there's likely a great opportunity to "translate" people who have gotten fed up with wage-slavery, into the new America's "knowledge workers." I'm working toward becoming a lawyer. I don't intend to work FOR other people for very long, and business is booming. A stripper can manage a damn website, of course, can't she? Well, hell, I figger when I hire a front-desk receptionist, I won't be hiring anyone who has any long-term plans for being a well-educated carefully trained invested-in-being-a receptionist. No, I want some perky tits. I won't be asking her to do anything but type some shit and be friendly and maybe show some cleavage and make my clients glad they came into the office. I'll be doing all the work, whether or not I have a competent receptionist. Her job will be to look pretty, or to not exist; why try to get someone who can help with the work itesel, when it's basically impossible for that person to get involved in the work because of confidentiality reasons and therefore there's no helping to be done? If the girl also, I find out later, happens to be someone who runs a little side business that involves turning tricks or setting up lunchtime liasions or simply finding apartments for her former co-workers from the sex-related industry, all the better.
Ah, life's a peach, ain't it. Just keep your eye on the class-lines. Right there. Right between her top two buttons of her blouse, where the left class mushes up agains the right class ... :)
For instance, last night we visited our favorite club because it was Porn Star Weekend and we wanted to see Alexis Texas. (exceptionally hot woman, btw, with a great attitude and very nice stage show) Our favorite entertainer was not present so we were having a nice time with our newest "friend." We had just agreed to go back for some private dances because they were 2/$50 instead of the normal $30 each. We got back into the room where the bouncer told our dancer she was not allowed to begin any dances because the star was about to take the stage and the agreement with her was no one would be in the private rooms while she performed. So we went back up front, enjoyed her show and tipped at the stage.
After the show, our dancer was up in the rotation and went to do her time on stage. When she left, we all were under the understanding that when she returned we would resume our original plan of getting the private dances. In the meantime, my husband's pager went off and there was a network problem that needed his immediate attention. He went to the car to call in and let them know he was aware of the issue and would be looking at it in approximately 15 minutes while I waited for the stripper to come back from freshening up after her dance. I explained what happened and then tipped her $40. She spent the majority of her evening with us and we also bought her 3-4 drinks and some cheese sticks. (Yeah, wife was hungry and we believe it is rude to eat in front of someone and not offer.)
That is why dancers tell us we are "their favorite couple", why they come by to talk to us even when we are sitting with another dancer and why they seek us out when there are specials. We also ask, "do you have any rules?" whem we go back for the first time and make sure to tell them any that we also have. (Mainly that we have a code word and if she hears one of us use it she needs to stop what she is doing because of us feels uncomfortable or has a problem)
I laugh at the article because I am sure that those who do not tip strippers well probably don't tip anyone well. I bet most of them don't tip the person who cuts their hair or give monetary gifts at Christmas to the person who does their lawnwork or even a card to their mailcarrier.
Mrs m00tpoint
Waste of bandwidth.
The phrase "man bites dog" describes a phenomenon in journalism in which an unusual, infrequent event is more likely to be reported as news than an ordinary, everyday occurrence (such as "Dog bites man"). The news media generally consider an event more newsworthy if there is something unusual about it; a commonplace event is unlikely to be taken as newsworthy. The result is that rare events often appear in headlines while common events rarely do, making the rare events seem more common than they are. The pattern is also described in the proverbs "You never read about a plane that did not crash" and "You don't hear about the laws that a politician did not break."
There are plenty of comments on this site about strippers scamming customers. I guess it can happen to strippers too.
A lot of dancers feel the way the author does, they just don't write about it or tell you about it because its not conducive to good customer relations.
I don't think this was an attack on all customers. For example, I have felt the way the author does on more than one occasion and I love men. I like my customers. I appreciate that they are in the club just like I'm sure they appreciate the fact that I'm dancing.
A dancers experiences aren't all peachy, though, and I think the author touched on some annoyances that dancers encounter with a given few.
A stripper's RANTS
RANTS:
1) Hey you over there, holding that one dollar bill in your hand with a death grip and waving it around at me like it's the fucking deed to Trump Towers... what the fuck do you want me to do, grow another pussy?? It's a fuckin' dollar, put it down on the tiprail already.
2) Men that come into the club for a lapdance with NO underwear or boxers and thin-ass, nylon shorts, so we slip and slide on your hard-on (which always feel like a sharpie pen). Ew! I don't even bother dancing with you nasty fucks anymore.
3) You with the thick-ass jeans--this was an impromptu visit, eh?
4) Don't pull my thong up during a dance and ask me if that felt good. It does NOT FEEL GOOD.
5) Hey you loser, counting all your bills to me after the dance, all $20 in ones, and rubbing your fingers between each one to make sure you are giving me just that one dollar. Yes, you.
6) No I will not let you just "slip it in real quick" for 50 more bucks. If you're going to proposition me, at least don't insult my worth.
7) Stop asking me if my tits are real. There are as real as my affection for you.
8) If you cum in your pants, you have to tip me an extra $100 for being a lame-ass who can cum from just a lapdance.
9) Stop asking me out. You're a smelly, fat loser and the only reason I'm smiling and cooing at you is because I want your money. Outside of the club I wouldn't even fart your way.
10) Stop bitching at me about the goddamn two drink minimum. First of all your breath stinks, you have a piece of salami stuck to your goat-tee and you look like Jay Leno. Secondly, I don't give a shit.
11) Don't bitch at me about the $8 non-alchoholic beer either. Hide a bottle of Jack in your coat pocket next time like everyone else does.
12) My horniness is in direct proportion to your income.
13) No, you CAN'T SMOKE. Dumb. Ass.
14) Boys, don't sit in the front row with your homeboys and act all engrossed in some deep conversation (knowing damn well you ain't talking 'bout shit) during a girls performance because you want to look like you're too "cool" to notice the hot, naked girl in front of you.
15) DON'T SIT IN THE FRONT ROW IF YOU ARE NOT GOING TO TIP. Fer chrissakes!!!!!!!!!!!
16) Dumb ass, don't ask me, "so what do you guys do when you're on your period?" Answer: I lap dance only with guys in dark pants.
17) STOP trying to grab my tits!!!!!!!!! That's extra.
18) SHOWER FIRST, you nasty fuck!
19) If you don't tip me, I'm going to call your wife.
20) I had a feeling you weren't going to tip me, so I took extra care to rub my lip gloss on your collar and wear extra glitter lotion before our dance.
21) Hey cheap-asses: please don't come to my work. Just stay home and jack off to reruns of "I love Genie" instead. It will save us a both a lot of unpleasantry.
22) Stop asking me why I do this job and get all analytical on me. For the MONEY you moron, that's why. Duh.
23) No seriously, my real name is Vixen Blue.
24) NO, I will not take a dime sac of weed for payment. I can tell it's oregano anyway you sick mutherfucker!
25) Sorry, I don't do that. Ask the ugly girl with the overbite and the black roots over there by the bar.
26) It is not okay for you to bounce me on your cock like a baby on a knee. Not okay.
27) Stop complaining about how short the song was. It felt like the fucking maxi-single to me.
28) Yes I will fuck you, but only for 10 grand. More if you're ugly. So basically, more.
29) DO NOT come into the club looking for a girlfriend/date. DO. NOT.
30) I don't care if you're cute and/or Brad Pitt's stunt double. I do not give free lapdances. Cute don't pay the rent.
31) Girls--what's with the pole smell? Can we do a little hygiene check? Nothing than worse than twirling around a pole and getting a whiff of stale pussy.
32) Girls--stop lip-syncing to the song you're dancing to on stage. Especially if you don't quite know all the words.
33) Girls--if your toes curl and hang over your platforms a la' Fred Flinstone, you need to go up a size.
34) Girls--drowning yourself in Angel perfume is just as bad if not worse than the BO you're trying to cover.
35) Hey DJ! You suck!
36) Girls--may I suggest complete sobriety before getting tatted up? Tattoos should be meaningful, or at least semi-meaningful, or at least semi semi-meaningful. That fucking smurf on your ass is lame.
37) Girls--some songs should not be stripped to. Please. No Disney soundtracks (you know who you are), Sade, Bjork, or Aaron Carter. PLEASE.
Thanks for listening.
Vixen Blue
#1- happens all the time.
#2- I have a customer that always wears nylon shorts with no underwear. He's really sweet though, plus he comes into the club 3x a week, same time, and only buys from me. Under those circumstances I'll gladly deal with the "peaking weanie" thank you.
#6- all the time.
#13- I have worked in a club with a smelly VIP. Guys would light up cigarettes, take a few drags, and wave it around. I didn't have the heart to freak out. The smell would kill anyone's mood.
#16- Cut your tampon strings and stuff the remainder as far up as possible. Getting the string caught on a zipper isn't cool. I've never seen a customer run for the door so fast.
And last but not least #31. And forget the pole, how about a guys crotch. When I get on my knees( yes I do and no I don't give BJ's), I don't want to smell the bad hygiene of the dancer before me.
Tips are earned. They are discretionary per individual. They are not entitlements.
That article went way beyond not getting paid. In my experience, once they start ranting about every stupid little thing that guys sometimes do then they are on their way out. She sounds like just another young burnout that can't handle the job.
A dancer who is more or less satisfied with her lot is still going to be able to overlook many of them on any given occasion, because there are enough decent experiences to let her put the bad ones out of her mind. It's only when the decline sets in that the bad ones start to overwhelm the decent ones, to the point they prompt the creation of a list like that.
And no, I'm not saying Daisy is burnt out, though she might be close if she's willing to both post the article and label it "spectacular". It's equally likely, however, that it just caught her eye.
Unfortunately, by the time I'm able to post again, this thread will probably be old news as I am heading out of town. I had a fun time with this thread though.
Someone could piece one together from several rants on here.
Like this, a customer rant about strippers who demand tips
So you think you deserve a tip from me? I was sitting in the back of the club minding my own business where I could barely even see any dancers and never saw you since I only arrived a short while ago. Yet you come over with your friend and bug me to death about getting a dance when I said I wasn't interested. You start intrusively running your fingers over me trying to turn me on and waste another 5 minutes of my time before asking for a dance again after I already said no. After all this you ask for a tip? You wasted my time, did not take no for an answer and now you want a tip on top of that? You don't deserve any tip except to hear that you should just leave a customer alone when he says no the first time unless you want to negotiate a better offer to him. If he says no again, just leave quietly.
I could go on, if the customer decides to give you and the other dancer a dollar tip to leave quietly but you think that is being cheap only getting a dollar per girl (2 dancers), you're really fucked up in the head. Leave quietly if you want any hope of getting money from me that night. Instead you tell me I need that dollar more than you do and give it back to me? WTF did you ask me for a tip in the first place? I gave you something to get rid of you quietly but the bitch in you wanted to complain anyway. After wasting my time and getting me a bit riled up, I decide to move locations since I felt like a target in that corner of the club. Well guess what, you find me again and try all over again a few minutes later. By that time, I believe you are just a stupid bitch and wish you were never working there and if I was a new customer, I might never return to that club again because of you.
I could go on with other customer rants. Rants can be fun.
Dancers who don't take know for an answer.
WTF is going on in your head that you think getting a dance from me is worth arguing with me about? I said no, no thanks, not right now, multiple times. Don't you know when to leave? You prefer to argue with me for over 15 minutes? This is a strip club not a debate fight club about why you are entitled to get a dance from your target. Just leave peacefully and ask me later. I probably won't leave right away if I just got there which I did in that case. Instead you get me so riled up, I'll leave the table I was sitting at and go elsewhere. I was relaxed and in a happy mood before you decided to argue with me for 15 minutes. So the club is dead and you feel desperate? It doesn't matter, leave after I say no unless you're trying to negotiate down on price.
To those dancers who want to argue and pull on my arms or drag me to the dance room, what the heck are you thinking? Dragging me somewhere isn't going to make me want to get a dance from you. What do you think this place is? A strip club or a Korean massage parlor where two girls routinely gang up on me and force me into the building?
Note: My experiences may not be typical for everyone.
Stiletto, the average life cycle of a stripper is under 4 years. Do you know how many multiples of that number that some of us have been dealing with strippers? Now I know that you probably view yourself as an onion with many layers and that customers couldn't possibly understand all that is you, but I've been dealing with strippers long before you got into the business and will be doing it long after you burn out.
I (and I am sure many other guys around here) have seen the cycle play out more times than I can count, enough to tell you that thin skinned strippers are invariably short lived ones.
Nothing about that was intended to suggest that nobody else can identify with her, or that she wasn't really having those problems, or that nobody else has had problems with customers or anything like that.
Nope, that plane is going down. She's too tightly wound and takes herself way too seriously.