A few years ago, I was in the public library in Lynnwood, WA (n. of Seattle). I happened to notice an attractive young lady, in her mid-twenties, standing in an aisle perusing a book. She was wearing a black pant suit. Then I quickly noticed that she was quite discernibly wearing stripper shoes! No doubt about it. As I went back to my table, I thought for ten minutes, if there was a tactful way to ask her if she was a stripper. I absolutely couldn't come up with the words to ask her. I didn't recognize her from any of the local clubs--Honey's: about five miles away in Everett, or Rick's: app. 10 mi. away in Seattle (both now closed). Has this ever happened to you? How did you deal with it?
Yes, it has, but like you, I've never thought of an uncreepy way to ask "Have I seen you naked somewhere?" In your example, I might have made a "nice shoes" comment, but I suspect that line coming from a creepy old guy like me might engender some...revulsion.
I've asked if they were a dancer and quickly added verbiage about their grace and fluidity, implying that they have had training in dance. But that question might be creepy or stalker-like in a library, less so in a bar. Most of the time they won't come right out and say they are strippers when they are in a civilian setting. But if you recognize their grace, and they've had training, they might admit to it and invite you to come see them at Club X. But they'd be a little wary of a stranger just walking up, so have very low expectations. The other extreme might be that they will say "no" and give you the body language of "buzz off". Chances of a moderately successful verbal interchange is probably 20%, so if you're the gambling type. . .
You probably shouldn't use as your opening gambit the line about her shoes. It's kind of like asking if a woman is pregnant; you better be right or she'll be pissed. And even if they are stripper shoes, she might not admit to it since it is a footwear faux pas to wear them in real life, kind of like wearing bowling shoes anywhere other than a bowling alley. If this was a non-stripper whose only rebelliousness was to wear stripper-looking shoes, you will piss her off with the question. And if she is not a stripper and you ask the question in the form of what you might think is a compliment ("You ought to be a stripper"), she'll still probably get pissed.
Stripper shoes are something of a trend now with civvies. You can't judge by that any more. Why not just approach her as a hot woman you want to me. Suck in your gut, try to hide your grey hair and wedding ring and strut on over and say something witty! LOL
I did work with a young woman once who had the perfect stripper body...but she was definitely not in the business...and she was married. :(
I strongly believe that at the end of the shift the dancers want nothing more that to get OUT of their stripper shoes and into something more comfortable.
"Excuse me, but curiosity trumps my natual reserve so I've got to ask, 'Are those shoes really that comfortable to wear?' I imagine wearing them and experiencing excrutiating pain in my leg and ankle"
The question is "set" in two bits of [hopefully disarming?] self-revelation; I've gone first in revealing something about myself and thereby inviting her to do the same. Making any overt comment about her [revealing?] pantsuit or anything sexual is sure to raise her defenses.
Primo has the right idea -- stripperwear is popular among civilian young women who want to be seen as sexy, attractive, and 'with it' Thong / g-strings, casual outerwear imprinted with sexual innuendo ["grab a bit of life; pink; too hot for U"]. It's part of the decade old stripper culture and doesn't signal they're strippers.
You just want to know whether she's a stripper??!! What a limited goal! If she's that attractive I'd want to see if she signaled interest in me during some neutral small talk. If so, I'd find out if she used the library often and plan on "running into" her again.
During the brief conversation I'd reveal more about me [I usually come here on X & Y days to research my family history in the area} Then I'd introduce myself while shaking her hand and quickly end talking and leave her alone. [I'm somewhat interested but not slobbering over her like a DOM] Doesn't matter whether she tells me her first name or not but most do and reveal a little about themselves if they have any small interest. Goal would be to develop an intimate relationship over time. Much more satisfying to me than being only a "looker" If something develops "great", if not "no big deal." as they'll surely be other attractive YWs coming along.
If you act hesitant rather than confident, don't self-reveal first, and talk in an apologetic voice you doom yourself to being a looser and DOM.
Of course, she could still freeeze you out, especially if she's a 9 or 10, knows it, and has a choice of many younger men to string along. Nothing you or I could do about that. But better to take a chance and get shot down if the prize for success [however small the chance] is so fabulous.
Recently I was behind a very attractive young woman at the Grocery checkout. She gave me a huge smile as she paid for her purchase with a stack of 1 dollar bills. I know she could have been a waitress or bartender, but I much prefer to think she was a dancer.
Either way she had a killer smile.
It's now been over three hours since I posted my experience. I just love reading your responses !!! You guys are full of great advice ! I especially liked looneylary's "bowling shoes analogy," Primo's idea to "make it rain," and Joker44: such a detailed analysis!
As a couple of you surmised, I was probably in the worst of places to have such an encounter, AND get an answer to my question--No wait, in church would have been even worse! My only saving grace, is that while she was pretty, she wasn't my type (like my profile pics). I didn't really need any more dancers on "wanna see list," anyway, at the time. I had plenty of faves.
I met a dancer down on South Beach in Miami a few weeks back. I had no idea she was. I saw her walking into the water as I was doing my daily walk on the beach and figured this was as good of a time to take a swim as any other time. We started to talk, and she just told me without me asking her that she was a dancer. She wasn't wearing stripper shoes. LOL. So I made it a point to go see her that night, and she was even more beautiful without clothes :)
I saw a stunner brunette one night a while back in the grocery store, who I guessed was a cheerleader for the local pro football team. No make-up, a pastel velour warm-up suit on, but still very hot. I desperately wanted to start up a friendly conversation. I had a grocery list with me. I went over and joined her at the cooler containing the soy milk and various other dairy alternatives. I spent a while looking at different cartons and with a befuddled look I turned to her and asked "Is there really a difference between soy milk and rice milk?" I thought maybe she would tell me about soy milk and why she liked it, or how it was good for her complexion, or how she tried rice milk once and didn't like it, or how she didn't drink it but was buying it for her boyfriend, etc. Instead she looked at me and said with that blonde dim-witted exasperation: "Soy milk is made out of soybeans and rice milk is made out of rice." She shook her head, as if to say "ya dumb fuck" and walked away.
Vincemichaels, A fairy tale that came true! I know of a very similar story! A fave of mine, here in Seattle, went to work in Las Vegas a couple of years ago. During the daytime, while poolside at her hotel (with three other dancer friends) she got the attention of a group of guys around her age. In talking with them she acted quickly when she saw a business opportunity by saying something like, "You can come and see us in even less and get lap dances from us tonight. We're working at (then) Seemless after 9 p.m." They had a very productive night at work.
Your pro cheerleader comment reminded me of an incident years ago. I was in a store talking with a co-worker and management from that particular store. We were talking "football" (I use that term sparingly these days when talking about the Dolphins) and like with any guys, the talk turned to the cheerleaders. As a season ticket holder, I always saw them and relatively up close with my 100,000 Power binocs. :) Anyway, I mentioned that the Dolphins seemed to pick somewhat unattractive women so they would not appear sexist. The store manager then commented that his wife IS a Dolphin's cheerleader. I was sort of dumbfounded as he didn't say it as though I had insulted his wife, but rather that he agreed!
Wow, Clubber, her husband helped you pull victory from the jaws of defeat. If it had been me that said it, there would have been a good 30 seconds of awkwardness. LOL Gatorfan wants to know if you still fucked her?
A lot of these girls are paranoid about their secret stripper lives, so I try to respect that even if they look so ridiculously stripperish that there's no way everyone can't know. Let 'em keep their dignity. :-)
Club_Goer, yes, indeed a fairytale that came true. Now that I am out of Florida on the road again, I hope that Clubber gets to meet her too, should she decide to work on the South End of Miami at Stir Crazy.
I was at an industrial trade show in Tampa and one of the exhibitors had hired some of the Miami Dolphin cheerleaders to pass out product brochures. I suddenly developed an intense interest in electrical connectors, lol.
I have seen girls who I suspected were strippers, but I'm not sure I would have anything to gain by striking up a potentially awkward conversation with them. After all, I'm probably not going to get a lapper on one of the waiting benches at the Wal-Mart pharmacy.
I may be a little bit different. If I see a really hot girl, I will almost always assume she is not a stripper. The only club I remember visiting that had a lot of 9's and 10's also had nothing but air dances. I haven't been there in many years.
"I like your shoes. Are you an exotic.dancer?"..sounds perfect to me..unless you're trying for a romantic dinner and a marriage proposal I wouldn't be so worried if she got upset. :)
Yeah, I think that sometimes. Especially on the interstate on my way to strip club when I see a car with 3 or 4 totally hot girls in it....I think to myself, they gotta be strippers heading into town to work.
Once on a crowded Friday night Delta flight from Cincinnati to Tampa, I sat right next to a young woman that had to be heading to Tampa to work for the weekend. She was totally hot - but slutty stripper hot, not model hot. Low cut top, obvious implants, and plenty of tats. But what really set her apart was the diva quality she had. She complained to the flight attendant about everything. Maybe just my fantasy, but I was sure she was a dancer, but I was too timid to ask her.
(which brings up a question for another topic....how DO most strippers dress in public. We like to think they dress in sexy, revealing clothes, but from my limited experience of seeing dancers outside of work, they tend to downplay their looks. Loose, baggy clothing, little or no make up, and wear glasses.)
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You probably shouldn't use as your opening gambit the line about her shoes. It's kind of like asking if a woman is pregnant; you better be right or she'll be pissed. And even if they are stripper shoes, she might not admit to it since it is a footwear faux pas to wear them in real life, kind of like wearing bowling shoes anywhere other than a bowling alley. If this was a non-stripper whose only rebelliousness was to wear stripper-looking shoes, you will piss her off with the question. And if she is not a stripper and you ask the question in the form of what you might think is a compliment ("You ought to be a stripper"), she'll still probably get pissed.
I did work with a young woman once who had the perfect stripper body...but she was definitely not in the business...and she was married. :(
The question is "set" in two bits of [hopefully disarming?] self-revelation; I've gone first in revealing something about myself and thereby inviting her to do the same. Making any overt comment about her [revealing?] pantsuit or anything sexual is sure to raise her defenses.
Primo has the right idea -- stripperwear is popular among civilian young women who want to be seen as sexy, attractive, and 'with it' Thong / g-strings, casual outerwear imprinted with sexual innuendo ["grab a bit of life; pink; too hot for U"]. It's part of the decade old stripper culture and doesn't signal they're strippers.
You just want to know whether she's a stripper??!! What a limited goal! If she's that attractive I'd want to see if she signaled interest in me during some neutral small talk. If so, I'd find out if she used the library often and plan on "running into" her again.
During the brief conversation I'd reveal more about me [I usually come here on X & Y days to research my family history in the area} Then I'd introduce myself while shaking her hand and quickly end talking and leave her alone. [I'm somewhat interested but not slobbering over her like a DOM] Doesn't matter whether she tells me her first name or not but most do and reveal a little about themselves if they have any small interest. Goal would be to develop an intimate relationship over time. Much more satisfying to me than being only a "looker" If something develops "great", if not "no big deal." as they'll surely be other attractive YWs coming along.
If you act hesitant rather than confident, don't self-reveal first, and talk in an apologetic voice you doom yourself to being a looser and DOM.
Of course, she could still freeeze you out, especially if she's a 9 or 10, knows it, and has a choice of many younger men to string along. Nothing you or I could do about that. But better to take a chance and get shot down if the prize for success [however small the chance] is so fabulous.
Either way she had a killer smile.
As a couple of you surmised, I was probably in the worst of places to have such an encounter, AND get an answer to my question--No wait, in church would have been even worse! My only saving grace, is that while she was pretty, she wasn't my type (like my profile pics). I didn't really need any more dancers on "wanna see list," anyway, at the time. I had plenty of faves.
Your pro cheerleader comment reminded me of an incident years ago. I was in a store talking with a co-worker and management from that particular store. We were talking "football" (I use that term sparingly these days when talking about the Dolphins) and like with any guys, the talk turned to the cheerleaders. As a season ticket holder, I always saw them and relatively up close with my 100,000 Power binocs. :) Anyway, I mentioned that the Dolphins seemed to pick somewhat unattractive women so they would not appear sexist. The store manager then commented that his wife IS a Dolphin's cheerleader. I was sort of dumbfounded as he didn't say it as though I had insulted his wife, but rather that he agreed!
Once on a crowded Friday night Delta flight from Cincinnati to Tampa, I sat right next to a young woman that had to be heading to Tampa to work for the weekend. She was totally hot - but slutty stripper hot, not model hot. Low cut top, obvious implants, and plenty of tats. But what really set her apart was the diva quality she had. She complained to the flight attendant about everything. Maybe just my fantasy, but I was sure she was a dancer, but I was too timid to ask her.
(which brings up a question for another topic....how DO most strippers dress in public. We like to think they dress in sexy, revealing clothes, but from my limited experience of seeing dancers outside of work, they tend to downplay their looks. Loose, baggy clothing, little or no make up, and wear glasses.)