The Ultimate Stripper Dilemma

How about grow up? You met her as a stripper and now want her to stop? You don't own or control anyone in this life, son. You seem very insecure and are already "in love". After three months? I doubt you really even know anything about this girl if you want her to stop stripping, how else is she going to provide for 2 children, taking 3 part-time jobs at mcdonalds?

"I know I won't find a girl as beautiful as her" Wow. Grow a spine.

You've known a girl for three months and want her to quit her job?

What do I think? I think you need to grow up.

Hmmm...

Realist hit the nail on the head, if perhaps using a large hammer. To his point though, if you met her in a strip club, but don't feel you can allow her to continue and share that fact openly, then yes, you should end it. Let her live her life as she chooses and go out and find a girl who does have the background/career/social standing you're seeking. To assist, there are all kinds of programs online that help to build confidence so you don't operate with a scarcity mentality, thinking you must make this relationship count because you fear you won't find someone as attractive again. And in any case, at some point down the road if she quits of her own accord, then maybe you can re-open things from a wiser and more confident position.

It may be hard to hear what Realist is saying, but he is right for the most part.

I believe you that the girl is really beautiful. I know what you're talking about - there really are some fine ladies (some that could pass as models, or in one case I know actually become a model) that happen to be at strip clubs for one reason or another.

It sounds like you are really into this girl, it may be rude but I do always have to ask in these situations, is this all mutual? The fact that you're not providing her with any funds makes it seem legit, which is good. You really don't want to make this into a pure monetary relationship either, if what you're after is something real.

Since you're already in love with her, you might consider taking care of the siblings while she is takes off her clothes in front of total strangers, and then jacks them off with her body at the club. She can support all four of you then. Maybe you can get a part-time job at a convenience store while she sleeps...or does OTC with a regular. If you're a big guy, you could probably make a few bucks stealing her customers' jewelry and money when they show up at the apartment to f**k her.

One day you will try to figure out where all the money she says she is earning is going, and you'll have slap her around when you find out she's got a $200/day blow thing and she never cut you in on it.

I'm not going to tell you to grow up...it ain't that easy. Get out there and give it a shot! Don't get in debt, and try not to get killed by a pissed-off customer.

Report back to us when you have time...I've always thought that someday, somebody, somewhere in the world would make relationship like this work.

With all due respect for everyone here and their experiences, I will say that not all strippers are going to be straight up whoring themselves out like that. Many do, but there are specific cases where this just isn't true (especially in markets where they just don't have to). We don't know the situation here, so I guess we can't really say for sure. But assuming the worst (or 'best' heh) is one way to look at it, as mmdv26 described.

ranukam, if you really think it is worth it, don't let people here stop you from doing your thing. Just be careful. Don't get yourself into debt, and don't be too hurt if this does not work out. You may be in contact with her in the future if she does decide to stop, and perhaps you can rekindle things. This girl may be very beautiful - but there are many great looking girls in the world. The fact that you're in love with this particular girl is what's probably putting you under the guise that she is the best (in your perception). Try not to get too obsessed.

Bail out.

Realist is right..100%...if she wants to quit she'll make the decision on her own. You two have only been together three months. If you love her, you gotta wait it out and focus on building your confidence. If you don't want to tell people what she does, that's your problem, not hers... If she's responsible for her siblings, that's a big responsibility. Her main concern is them, not your fear about her job..If you're bringing her down with your insecurities, its not fair. You're probably a great guy and I'm sure you care about her very much. You have to get over it!

Ranakam - Your setting yourself up to be a controlled cuckhold like the husband of a married stripper I have been doing about 3 years. I am approaching 200 sessions with her and POP is averaging $135. She describes her husband (third) as her soulmate and the love of her life on her FB page which I get to monitor daily. I did her the day before their wedding and as soon as she came back from the honeymoon. While she is a great fuck and super friend, I accept her for what she is (a prostitute).

You need to wake up and smell the coffee guy that your never going to own one of these gals - they do pretty much well what they damn well please. They do not believe in monogamy and the man who has more money than you is going to get to lease her for sex enjoyment as his mistress. She may stop stripping bc you mite be able to pay her bills but she wont stop the whoring with guys like me who are experienced strip club players. These girls get a lot of phone numbers during their stripping days. It is not uncommon for x strippers to go out with their x stripper gf for lunch at the mall and compare notes on guys they are doing for money. Mine does this I know with another one of her friends a married x stripper.

I agree with gsv that there is a SMALL number of cases where the situation could work out. It's hard to tell without knowing more about you situation. But let's be clear. The odds are stacked way against you. Personally, I couldn't handle the baggage of being a replacement daddy. The safest thing to do would be to bail out. Since you already seem to be having second thoughts... move on. Definitely get out when she starts taking your money.

You really need to find out more about this one. How much of what she told you was BS? How long has she been dancing? They get hooked on the $ because they just can't make the bucks this quickly any other way (except OTC sex). Many of them like sex, are good at it and realize the power it can give them to get money.

It's a long shot. Find out what she would like to be doing if she doesn't strip. Hey, enjoy the sex and have alot of it. Make sure you enjoy it.

Yeah, Realist is right (perhaps that's why he chose the handle). You are being very hypocritical. You say you go to strip to fuck a stripper but you don't usually get dances, well unless you look like a Greek god rarely having dances musn't go down well with the strippers? You say you want her to stop stripping, so it's ok for you to fuck other girls that maybe in the same situation but other guys can't fuck 'your' girl?

Bail out ASAP, before your wallet is empty, your heart broken and your self respect gone. You just finished college and fell for the first hot and "available" babe you met. Her siblings will need more money as they get older. Will you supply the extra income or will she do extras to get it? You are already embarrassed about her line of work. If she knows that you feel that way, there is already a barrier between you. Is this love or lust?

Maybe you should try sticking to fucking her she has you thinking way too much

Review the club so others can check her out.

If I were just out of school, I would fuck a stripper and try to be enough of a reg to get low POP. My gameplay would be to not get married until 28-30 and accumulate money. A stripper would not qualify for me as MS Right but as a go to girl to fuck on the side.

Ranukam - I wonder if your getting any from this gal and what your avg POP is. Read my articles about Dealing with Dancer Drama and Definition of a SC Player. Her problems are not yours and paying her bills is not your concern - just take it as SS for its entertainment value and negotiating a good POP. Assuming she wants money, negotiate it on a per session basis. Do not give her handouts or loans. She is not your GF, she is a whore, something you lease like a TimeShare. And you share her with others (you may not be aware) older guys like me who pay her money for sex. You will never own her.

Thanks for all the great feedback guys. I don't even know where to start. I didn't literally mean I won't find a girl as beautiful as her, of course there are more beautiful girls out there. With her beauty, I was combining her beauty inside and her beauty outside. I think I will end the relationship, there's just too many obstacles to get over.

londonguy- I don't know what you're talking about. What I said is I don't go to strip clubs trying to fuck or date a stripper. Get your facts straight before you comment on something.

Player11- With all due respect, if I want pussy, I don't have to pay girls to get it.

Ranukam - A little different take here...

If you've been with her for three months, and she hasn't been hitting you up for cash yet, that's a good sign she's not just using you. If she comes from an f-ed up family background and she's taking care of her younger sibs (who I assume you've met), she's not a typical dancer.

If you're serious about the relationship, proceed with caution, but don't judge her as many of the posts have judged her here...there's many lives at stake here, including some younger sibs. Don't come to tuscl.net for relationship advice.

At a minimum, stay friends with her...in the business she's in, she needs a true friend, especially someone near her own age. Take heed to the caution on the board...but don't lose a great relationship, friendship or more, based on the advice from the PhDs on this thread ;-)

Good luck.

I've met some very hot girls in strip clubs. At one club I considered going out with one girl but thought she was just pulling my chain so I didn't push it. After a couple of months without me even attempting to get more details about her personal life, I figure she thought I wasn't as interested or something. Then one night when she was blabbing on about a lot of things in her personal life, she told me she was engaged to someone else. She was pulling my chain when I first met her. Yet strangely I still feel very attracted to her. Every once in a rare while I spot a superhot 10. It's been a long time since I've seen a dancer look that good.