She sits, you know you don't want, do you tell her ASAP?

35 comments

• CTQWERTY

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  13 years ago

  Might be wise to tell them you just arrived and want to watch one rotation of the gals on stage before doing anything else. Then you haven't rejected them outright and aren't stringing them along either.
• looneylarry

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  13 years ago

  Depends on my mood. If I'm having a bad night, I let the awkwardness fester awhile. I even ask her about other dancers (which kind of pisses them off). If the hints don't work, and I am quite sure that I am leaving anyway, I jump up and chug my drink and bid her adieu and march out. Usually leaves them dumbstruck. But most of the time, if I sense that it will be painful to sit and talk, I'll tell them "Thanks, but I'm not interested".
• SuperDude

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  13 years ago

  Ill mannered dancers who can't take a polite hint, deserve to be told, firmly, to move on. If they can linger for a tip or a drink, they will. So, if they can't get the hint, I tell them I came in to relax and not to be pushed into things I don't want to do. "Would a conversation with the manager help you understand me?" If the other dancers hear about it, too bad. A tip will bring the one you want to your table. You're in charge, not the dancers.
• GoVikings

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  13 years ago

  I'm sure it'll happen eventually, but I haven't really ran into any bitchy dancers that complain or get an attitude when I turn them down for a dance. They just move on and ask another guy. In fact, the last time I was at a club, a girl came over and chatted with me for 30 minutes or so. It was around 6PM, so there weren't many dancers there and I'm sure she was just bored since the club was slow at the time. She wasn't bad looking at all, I just didn't think she was lap dance worthy. Despite that, she was friendly and talked to me even after I had turned her down for a dance. Long story short, she went and got another dancer (that I was really interested in) that had told me she would be back to sit and talk with me in 5 minutes after she took a cig break. We (me and the dancer I wasn't interested in) sat there for a little while, and she hadn't came back after 10 minutes, so the dancer that I had been sitting there talking to for a while, asked me "Did I want her to go find the other one and bring her back?" And I said sure. Before you know it, the one that I was interested in was back and chatting with me. See, you guys, they can be helpful even when you aren't interested in them. :)
• samsung1

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  13 years ago

  good question...I am sometimes on the fence about it and let them sit and give their sales pitch. If they bring up their "rules" about no pussy or tit touching then I know to tell them to go away but if they play their cards right then I just might go for a dance. It happened to me this past Monday. She sat down and I said "sure is dead in here tonight" and instead of complaining like a typical stripper would do she joked about it saying I shouldn't be coming here for the men and it is more private this way.
• samsung1

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  13 years ago

  ^^^^^^The reason why I was on the fence with this gal is because I had dances with her before and she did some pleasurable stick shifting but refused to give me a HJ. It was over a year ago. As of recent I found out she does not even stick shift anymore so now if she were to sit with me I would not even consider doing a dance with her again. I would just give her customer shit if she came over sitting with me (bitching about gas prices and such until she got the hint to go away)
• kingcripple

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  13 years ago

  not always. sometimes ill let them sit and chat. then i tell them im good when they ask for a dance and want them to go away
• troop

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  13 years ago

  unless you have a prior history together, a dancer should ask if she can join you before just sitting down. i had a fat one that i wasn't interested come and sit down without asking once. she was killing any chance that i could have with the dancers that interested me so after a couple minutes i went up to the stage and started tipping another dancer and then went back to my seat and ignored the fat one. she got the message after a minute or two and disapeared.
• troop

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  13 years ago

  actually i just remembered that one time the ugliest dancer i ever saw came up to me, sat down and started talking to me in a small club where i was the only customer. i tried not to be mean but when she started to grind on my lap i guided her away and went up to tip a dancer on stage and stood there until her set ended. then i asked the one on stage to come back to my seat with me and the ugly one slithered off. the stage dancer became my atf for the next 2 or 3 months and the ugly one left the club after working a few days and not making any money.
• RickWood

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  13 years ago

  I've also told the dancer that I know she's at the club to make some money, but I'm not really interested in a lap dance and I don't want to keep her from meeting someone else that may be buying dances. I've had that work and she leaves for another dancer to sit down almost immediately that I hit it off with and we go to the VIP. I have also had that backfire when its slow...she won't leave because I was nice about refusing her offer. That brings a trip to the restroom and I come back to sit at another table across the room. That works everytime.
• SuperDude

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  13 years ago

  RickWood and I seem to employ the same defense. If that polite hint doesn't work AND if I don't feel like relocating, I will become more direct, but prefer not to. Relocation is not always an option, but if available, will solve the problem.
• gk

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  13 years ago

  If i know that I won't be getting any dancers from her, I try to make that clear up front. Saves me some wasted time and her too. And like RickWood says, it clears the space quicker for someone else. looneylarry--LOL, that's a little crazy, bit I have to admit I've felt that way sometimes. But I try to be polite and maintaim some mutual respect. That's just the best way to operate, for me.
• basketball

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  13 years ago

  Sometimes it's nice to have a blocker next to you to keep you from the dollar parade. Sometimes a unwanted sidekick keeps the girl of your dreams from making your dreams a reality. I usually don't like to burn my bridges with a girl who I may want a dance from in the future. It's kind of like fishing. You need to know when to tug on the line a little harder, when to really reel her in, and when to let her go.
• Clubber

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  13 years ago

  I tend to just basically ignore them. If they ask a question, I give a simple, curt reply. Doesn't often take them long to get the hint, or ask for a dance and I tell them no, and they move along. I think some worry by getting rid of a dancer, they will pass that along to the others and no one will stop by. I don't find it detracts from others stopping by.
• georgmicrodong

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  13 years ago

  I try to let them know as soon as *I* know. That might range from as soon as I see she's coming my way from across the room, or after her sales pitch fails. There's usually no long periods of time involved around here; almost all the clubs have predatory "buy the lady a drink" hustles, where the girls aren't *allowed* to stick around after a customer says "no" once or twice.
• asianluva2009

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  13 years ago

  I always introduce myself, if necessary ask them to repeat their name(sometimes it's loud) and nicely say "I am waiting for someone." Typically that will work and should not burn any bridges.
• IrishLad

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  13 years ago

  Tell them. They should ask to join you, but after a few minutes something along the lines of "So...I'm just going to relax and enjoy my beer for a while" usually does the trick. Shes a fool to get bent if you don't buy a dance under any circumstances and to be honest 90% of the time its just manipulation.
• PHound

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  13 years ago

  1) If the club is dead and I'm not interested in getting a dance, I tell them OK to sit but if you need to make money it's OK to move on. 2) If she's just OK and I'm not waiting for a specific dancer then I tell them to sit; if the conversation is pretty good then I'll usually buy a drink even if I'm not going to get a dance. 3) Sometime I end up meeting a dancer that has a great personality and I've found out that a great personality along with a good attitude can mean a good time, not necessarily high mileage. 4) If I don't know her and she starts out by asking for a drink then I usually say no thanks. At some clubs they get paid to hustle you for a drink, if I think that's happening I say, no thanks or if they are hot I say maybe later. 5) If I'm waiting for a specific dancer I'll say I'm waiting for "XXXX" and you are welcome to sit for a while. If they are friendly with girl "XXXX" quite often she will help get her for me.
• lvlap123

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  13 years ago

  In my experience dealing with situations like this is more of an art than a science. It is a tough situation when you have the unwanted presence or they even push you to buy you a drink or start asking "Why not?". Most of the dancers are nice but some do get hardened by too many rejections and having few drinks does not help the attitude either. It is tough to be polite and express yourself without appearing to be rude.
• Prim0

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  13 years ago

  I'm with Rickwood. A trip to the smoking patio or bathroom usually helps to shake them off.
• BaddJack

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  13 years ago

  I usually just lift a cheek, close one eye and fart loudly. She gets the idea.
• tttclub

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  13 years ago

  I was always using "I'm waiting for someone" but recently I've gotten bored with that so I switched up to what RickWood says, "I know you're here to make money, and I don't want to waste your time" kinda thing. It is stunning how many come back with the "well I'll hang out for awhile anyways." I thought that line would be perfect, yet I am amazed how often it backfires. Now I'm stuck with a girl I don't want, and it's blocking the spot for someone better to come along. I've become somewhat of a regular at a club recently, and I am happy that the girls that I've blown off seem to stay away. I would hate to have to try 3 or 4 different blow off lines to the same dumb whore that can't remember the last time. Or maybe I'll just use BaddJack's suggestion, that should work right?
• Clubber

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  13 years ago

  I damn near got booted out of my first SC this afternoon because of this! I visit this club infrequently because most, if not all, of the dancers are black and I am not a fan of black dancers. I know the bartender well and have for years. Anyway, I was STANDING at the bar talking with the bartender when a black dancer sits in a chair beside me. I did the ignore thing above. All was well till the bartender had to serve others. The dancers starts in and did ask if she could sit with me. I said I am not sitting. She asked my name and a couple other SS questions. I then told her sorry, but I am not interested in any dancers here. There starts her attitude, and she says with her attitude, "What's wrong with black dancers?" I answered, "That right there, your attitude!" She was a bit shocked I think, and said nothing, so I continues since she stayed. I told her each of us is entitled to like and dislike whoever we want, and it was none of her business who or why I didn't like certain dancers, black or not. Then she starts into me. I turned away as the bouncer headed towards us. Luckily for him, my bartender also stared back and called him off. She knows my feelings and understand she is the only reason I even enter that club any more. Oh well, it could have been fun!
• joker44

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  13 years ago

  Clubber, had similar experience several years ago in local club. Slow nite, so lots of dance and drink hustle from most dancers. Black dancer approaches me and w/o any verbal foreplay asks about a dance. I say "No thanks." Immediately, hit back w/ "U don't like black girls." Definitive conclusion not even framed as a question. My reply, It's not the color of your skin but the tone of UR attitude and lack of sensuality. Clubber UR right, we are entitled to our persoanl preferences but sometimes voicing them in a heated atmosphere leads to problems. Like it's not really smart to stand in the middle of Tripoli and say Gaddafi is a fruitcake and mass murderer unless your intention is to become a martyr. So with this dancer -- she's anxious to score some $$$ and maybe angry that things are slow in this economy. Already pissed off she easily jumps to the "black dancers" explanation becuase it takes the focus off her as an individual and gives her a perfect vehicle to unload her pent-up anger [in her mind, on a racist bastard!]. When someone's that emotionally jacked up it doesn't really matter whether they guess your attitude correctly or not. You didn't shove your personal preferences in her face but she reached for the most damning [for you] and, yet, face-saving [for her] motive for your rejection.
• gatorfan

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  13 years ago

  The fuck me or fuck off line would work.
• Ironcat

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  13 years ago

  I'm with the "I'm waiting for someone" approach. I use it as soon as the undesirable dancer approaches. Usually it works right away and the dancer moves on. On occasion, a dancer will say "well who are you waiting for... I'll go get her" to which I reply "That's OK she knows I'm here". That usually keeps them from bothering me the rest of the night. I also don't believe rejecting a dancer causes other dancers to shun a customer - after all they are interested in making money.
• jackoff

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  13 years ago

  Nothing worse than the ugliest, fattest dancer in the club plopping down right beside you without even asking. Then within 2 seconds comes the hard sell waitress asking you to buy her a drink before chubby even says hello. Sometimes I think it's a set up. After 25 + years of strip clubbing it still depends on my mood. I've actually told a few girls that I'm in a bad mood and I need a few drinks by myself before I'm ready for company, to just telling them their not my type and I don't want to waste her time or especially mine!
• rickdugan

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  13 years ago

  I usually tell them quickly. More often than not, I'll use something like "Honestly sweetie, I'm really just looking to chill out right now and I'm not looking for company just yet." This works almost every time.
• uscue13

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  13 years ago

  Like clubber said, I usually ignore them with short answers and typically i just look at the stage. After a while, sometimes some of them still stay, even up to the point that the waitress stops by and looks at both of us as if to suggest getting her a drink. I usually pull a fast "I'm good", but other than that I have a hard time telling them no interest. If I'm lucky I'll already be waiting on someone and tell them so, but I can't be straight mean and tell them no interest. If they ask for a dance, I give the not right now answer which typically works, but they have to ask for it first. Some girls happily sit there for 30 minutes first
• curiousgeorgefun

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  13 years ago

  Happened twice after a minute or so I, "confessed that she wasn't my type" both dancers seemed to appreciate that I didn't waste their time. (One was fluffy and the other black) they asked what was my type and I told them white spinners ( of course I had to explain it to one who seemed to enjoy my description) both girls were able to read between the lines. I tipped them a five for their time and company. Both went and found the perfect girl for me and must have endorsed me because it was if I were a regular and the private dances seemed to skip the "feeling out"song. Has also backfired..... never had one make a sceen but once itwas as if I had the plague. When I returned a brave girl sat down and I told her I almost didn't come back beczuse the girls th
• cammy

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  13 years ago

  Are you for real?? No girl ever really wants to sit with any guy that comes in.. we only sit with guys because we have to and we only want your cash. Line after line.. just a whole bunch of fat, ugly old guys that cant get anything anywhere eles. hahaha Broke ass men shouldnt even come to visit. If it wasnt for us girls there woulnt be a club and there would be no more dumb ass lines to get a girl to leave..
• shadowcat

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  13 years ago

  cammy, fuck you very much. Now get your lame ass over to stripperweb, where it belongs.
• georgmicrodong

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  13 years ago

  Speak for yourself, cammy.
• rickdugan

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  13 years ago

  lol cammy - that's okay. You see, here's the thing dumpling: in a few years from now, when your ass is broke and busted out of this business, we will just be fucking and sucking the next crop of young strippers. The average life cycle for a dancer is something like three years while many of us have been doing this through multiple crops of you very replaceable strippers. I may be twice your age, but I'll still be fucking girls from the clubs half my age when you are nothing but a distant memory. Get the point sweet pea? ;)
• georgmicrodong

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  13 years ago

  Egad! It won't be too many more years when the ones I want are gonna be only a *third* my age! I hope I'm as able as shadowcat when I get there. That's not a slam, BTW.