I got a lap dance from a dwarf stripper

A few months ago my favorite club advertised the appearance of a dwarf feature dancer. The dancer in the ad was "Tiny Tina", who was a dwarf but looked fairly proportional. When I arrived, the dancer was someone named "Lil Cassie" or something like that. She was extremely tiny, like 2'9" or something. And she looked prepubescent.

I stayed for the show. This woman was so tiny she couldn't wear heels. She wore flip flops, and her mobility wasn't the greatest onstage. I sat at the stage to tip, and next thing I know her suitcase pimp has pulled my chair back and Cassie jumped(well, sort of) onto my lap, straddled me(surprised me with her athleticism, actually), and gave me a lapdance. It. Was. WEIRD! She had no secondary sexual characteristics. Her hands and feet looked like those of a baby. As a matter of fact, it was like GETTING A LAP DANCE FROM A BABY.

That's the only time I didn't get aroused from a dance. I'm thankful, because if I'd really enjoyed it I'd be chasing dwarf chicks.