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theDirkDiggler

Illinois

Hopefully, the pandemic, at least in the US dies down sooner rather than later, but as long as it is in the world and the US doesn't completely physically shut down its borders, it will always be a risk. But let's optimistically assume that the virus does die down in the next month or two to the point that the country as whole does "reopen." Maybe to something like how life is right now in South Korea, China (like it or not, all eyes will be watching them) and soon Australia. Strangely, Australia is the only other country with high infection numbers (that's why i'm not including Taiwan, Hong Kong and Singapore as they never really got hit badly and had to shut down although they are socially distancing) that has contained the virus, with over 6,000 confirmed cases. Wow, does anyone remember when 6,000 cases was ALOT?

But i am digressing. How would life look like here? Everyone still staying 6 feet apart when possible and everyone wearing a mask? No gatherings larger than 50 people? Will movie theaters ever reopen? If they do, will they only operate around 10% capacity and without any HVAC to prevent circulation of aerosolized droplets? Will restaurants accept dine in customers? Specifically, how would this apply to strip clubs?

Now strippers are at the very least risk in terms of Covid-19 complications, besides young children (who are strangely overprotected in this crisis; when everyone talks about protecting their family they always talk about their kids who may already have had it and given it to countless other people). They're "generally" young, healthy women at a "healthy" weight. The worst effects of this disease tend to strike the old, unhealthy and male. And blacks, which tend to be underrepresented at most strip clubs in terms of strippers. So as long as strippers don't interact with vulnerable populations outside of work (and many are estranged somewhat from their older family members, particularly their parents) they might not feel any "direct" liability toward the spread of the disease besides to their customers which they might not give a rat's ass about besides the money they spend. And if they give it to their kids, well, kids have the very best prognosis. They may even run with some of the talking heads and say they are "saving the economy" and increasing herd immunity. So this part of the equation seems to manageable.

However, the customers, especially the ones that spend the most money on strippers, tend to be older men with all the usual risks that are involved. If they don't feel safe doing an activity that is very likely to spread the virus, how will strip clubs ever get back to anything resembling what they once were? There may be a whole bunch of customers that just don't give a rat's ass either about getting it or giving it to a stripper and whomever she interacts with. Many of them may end up being misguided. If further outbreaks do end up getting discovered at strip clubs, expect that industry to quickly get shut down again. Never mind all the potential lawsuits. So i don't think it can be a matter of personal risk acceptance.

That is even if all strippers and PLs signed a waiver saying that they could not sue if they became infected with Covid-19 during or after their time in a strip club, that probably wouldn't be enough. A second wave of infections caused by people that didn't care about other people getting sick or worse would likely be considered a national security threat as well as a national economic threat. So there will be a very high bar to pass before strip clubs can reopen and stay open.

What would it take? The answer is probably testing. Testing of all strippers like they do porn stars for STIs. Testing of all other staff too. Only a negative test (say every week or at least whatever frequency porn stars do) to the antigen (virus free) and/or a positive test to the antibodies (virus cleared, which in this case would no longer require frequent testing) would allow a stripper to work. No exceptions. And maybe waivers will still have to be signed. So that clears things on that end and pretty well actually.

But what about customers? That is much more tricky. Now if testing methods are improved and simplified to the point that testing can be done and very accurate results can be returned in minutes, like less than 10 minutes, they may have to set up testing stations outside of strip clubs or just inside strip club entrances. Now only first time PLs post reopening would have to get tested. When results are known, cleared customers are given a card. Customers that don't pass and are refused aren't charged for the test, while the ones that pass have this cost credited toward their cover charges for a time period. This allows entrance for a certain time period until they have to be retested again unless they have the antibodies which gives a different card (VIP or something; probably not going to be called VIP) or status if an actual physical card isn't used.

Now just because a regular card is given, doesn't mean that PLs can just enter a strip club. They will still have to be screened. They will be asked if they went to any other strip clubs (that are also legally required to use this system), how often and when. This doesn't automatically disqualify them, but changes their risk assessment (displayed by wristband) or require wearing a mask which many will probably do anyway especially if it becomes legally required. They will be asked about symptoms and if they were near anyone with symptoms or a confirmed positive diagnosis. They may even be asked about their other recent public activities and of course their temperature will be taken and their hands sanitized. Then they are cleared.

Speaking of masks. Depending on the laws, maybe all PLs will have to wear a mask even in the strip clubs which may even provide them. Maybe no food and drink will be allowed as well. So no waitresses and bartenders and no usual bar to gather around. Just extra risk activities. As well as strict head counts and spacing out of tables, seats and groups. Maybe there will be much more strict enforcement of contact during dances. Absolutely no using the mouth and no private rooms. Sanitized hands and surfaces before and after all dances. Maybe masks still stay on during dances.

Now i would hope that the above paragraph doesn't apply with my local strip clubs. But somehow i doubt it considering the governor of Illinois and how seriously he seems to take this. Because if that happens, i probably will sit out the strip clubs and maybe just go to eye candy clubs once in a while. One silver lining might be the increase of nude clubs and nude stages as less clubs serve alcohol and food. So i might just end up spending less money ITC and have to work on my OTC game. But in this scenario, i can see clubs charging much higher rents and taking a significant amount of stage tips, which dancers will likely not be allowed to physically touch until they leave. A lot of clubs might install cash counting machines inside to expedite this.

Of course, this is all speculation and the endgame is still far far away, but this might still be able to work. And hopefully anything can change whether it's breakthroughs in treatment or testing that can make a new normal more "normal".

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