The Many Kinds Of Strip Club Wingmen

I’m with Dave Chappelle on this one: I prefer to hit clubs alone these days. I’m a dayshifter as are most of us here and I’m not a huge ITC extras guy like many of us here but that can still happen. To me it’s more awkward to pile in with a crowd of men and get wood than it is to go solo. I can protect and handle myself. No disrespect to Dave’s wife but yeah man she’s off on this one.

Mostly through it’s not the getting it in around with a bunch of other dudes that gets me off wanting to hang with other mongers ITC. I mean if I’m in the club and getting it in, I’m around other dudes. It’s just that, like strippers, PLs tend to be bad company for me. I hang out with 3 friends in clubs these days and one of my bosses inexplicably. I know these guys and we know how to do our thing in the club without messing up the others good time. Because if you come in with a guy everyone in the club will associate you with the guy and what he does will affect you.

But based on seeing what PLs post online and seeing how some dudes act ITC I don’t want to expand that circle. I can see we often don’t have the same temperament for dealing with staff and dancers and aren’t going to the club with the same motives. Not going to clubs for the same reasons that I do doesn’t make a person evil, duh. But those differences can cramp my style. And of course some of these people are evil.

I think knowing what kind of PL you are is like knowing your love language (LOLJK but no seriously). It makes it’s easier for you to set expectations, financial/emotional boundaries, pick the clubs that work for you, and maximize the value you get for your dollars. It also lets you know who you need to hang out with, keep a distance from or stay away from completely or basically who’d make a good wingman. I’ve observed a few types, some OK, some tragic, and a few great. Some of this is based on bad experiences I’ve had hanging with guys ITC. What kind of wingman are you?

Normal Wingmen (PLs That Don’t Annoy Me)

Mr. Newbie - We all had to learn the ways. From the guy who’s never been to the club, to the vet from another city learning a new cities club scene, to a long time club goer adjusting to ways run now as opposed to 30 year ago, even going from a day shifter to a night shifter and vice versa we’ve all been there. How can I be annoyed by taking that guy around?

Well the thing if it is, I’d rather be enjoying my time than hand holding someone else through the learning process. Plus some guys will NEVER learn anyway. Yes that selfish but I go to the strip club in part because I’m selfish.

Mr. Perv - This guy has done zero wrong, shit I’m this guy. But this is where the awkwardly-hanging-with-aroused-compatriots thing comes in. In some clubs, maybe more upscale and less extras heavy, hanging ITC with a hardcore monger feels like weird teen boy kissing and telling, and possibly lying. In more extras clubs it can border on an orgy.

Ms. Wifey - For women that go with their husbands they tend to be policing his every breath or uh participating very passionately. Why would I want to be the 3rd or 4th wheel on that? That whole concept gets me talking like a prude and again who likes a prude in the strip club?

Mr. Traprapper - Basically these are make it rain guys, especially awkward for me now as a dayshifter. I go to clubs for almost the exact opposite reason these guys do now: they want to be seen and show they are the man. They also seem less interested in ITC physical contact. That’s everything I’m not these days. And I know there should be a space between trap and rapper but many trap rappers can’t read anyway.

Clipped Wingmen (PLs That Annoy Me or Annoy Everyone or Should Be Beaten)

Mr. Brokie - I have an especially embarrassing story around this topic but damn it if you can’t afford it why did you want to go out? If you’re trying to save, save. What do you mean “this club makes you spend a lot?” It’s a strip club! Come with your cash out or hit up Spankbang. This also goes for people who don’t tip ANYONE on staff, I look like an ass by association.

Mr. Dirtbag - Wash your ass. Clean your clothes. Brush your fucking teeth. Dancers aren’t so desperate they’ll blow a hobo. I should not have to tell a grown man this but we’ve probably all seen it.

Mr. Pushover - These are they guys who flinch everytime a dancer bucks, are easily cowed and end up paying 1000 dollars for nothing. They also tend to leave angry and resentful over their own lack of spine. If I come in the club with guys like that, strippers will think I'm also there to work for them.

Mr. Needy - I separate this from Mr. Pushover because there is at least an exchange here. I’m also not taking about basic small talk that some dancers take as an attempt flirting or pimping or whatever. That could be GSP, socially inept and possibly scarred dancers projecting into normal men stuff that isn’t there.

I’m talking about the guy who needs the dancers to act like they care about him. I don’t, I just need a lap dance. I just let those guys wrap themselves around a tree. There’s no point in telling them theirs is no “relationship” to get caught up in, you’re not getting to know her and she humors you for money. If that’s the fantasy you need fine. We just don’t need to hang out. I hate watching people headed for disaster.

Ms. Too Cool - I’m talking about the kind of chicks that show up with their male coworkers or husband and announce how cool they are with all this like that one skit from Family Guy. They also tend not to tip anyone or get dances. It’s hard to have fun around someone pretending to have fun. Some of these chicks also think they have no boundaries to stay within when dealing with dancers because they are women or do stuff that takes attention away for the strippers.

Mr. Hypocrite - I don’t think PLs are better than the strippers, we are all in the club. I do not understand that holier than whore attitude. There are some guys that bang out girls and still see them as people even if the girls don’t like them. There are others who see these same women as essentially things, basically a race, an age, a hair color, a bust size and a performance. Those dudes turn my stomach, are glorified incels and are people I do not want to be bothered with them.

Mr. Cheater - For guys who come in hiding something, some of them have to operate within certain limits, sneak around and act paranoid. I want to be free and have fun. I don’t have to hide lipstick on my zipper or perfume on my shirt. I can’t help you keep your secrets, why would I go to the club to do that?

Mr. Bitches - Basically the PL that thinks he's a player, really one of the only actual PLs in the club. I had a friend that I used to club with who said dancers always laughed at his jokes. Dude of course. It’s a strip club! Acting like she likes you, at least in the case of working guys who need to think they’re players, is what puts bucks in that Birkin. He got fake laughs. I got extras. I don’t want dancers to think all they have to do for me is make me feel charming because of the company I keep.

Mr. Argue - I don’t go back and forth with strippers about dance count, tipping or extras. I also don’t go back and forth about a dancers boundaries if she wants to air dance I’ll find another dancer. I don’t allow dancers to brow beat me into a dance or a tip either. I say no, say no again, and walk away and if I have to get a bouncer or leave the club I will.

But some guys get baited into BS so easy. I know a dude who had a stripper throw her fake stripper business that doesn’t hire anyone in his face and call him broke after he denied her a dance and he wasn’t smart enough to let it go. Why? Why? Dealing with a blow up like that, or someone who could blow up like that it just kills the vibe.

Mr. Hang - These are the guys that like to drink, play pool/darts/cards, smoke, or watch the game instead of get dances and VIP. I don't like to hang in clubs of any kind and I don’t care about the damn vibes. I get my run in with the hotties and leave. I’m not racking your balls for you.

Ms. Feminazi - These are either the girls that show up to hate on the dancers, hate on the PLs or yell at the guys to pay the dancers. I think it would surprise some people how much many dancers actually hate the 3rd kind of pushy female customer here. Imagine showing up when a chick who does any of these things.

Mr. Rapey - No means no. Some dudes think they can treat dancers like sex dolls. Those dudes should be rag dolled. I don’t test dancer’s boundaries for any reason. If she says no to extras once the answer is always no. In real life a chick that turns down sex early might not want to look like a hoe. With dancers that dynamic is different. I’m unnerved by guys who wait for a dancer to be struggling and then try to push them past what they want from there and don’t want to deal with them.

Solid Wingmen (PLs I Can Definitely Vibe With)

Mr. Chadrone - I club with a Marine who’s 6’3, 210 pounds. Strip clubbing with dudes that looks wise can get laid by accident is bizarro world. From what I gather strippers tend to think these dudes don’t need them, won't/cant spend on them, will try to date them, won't be impressed by there looks (looks are subjective but let’s be real most sex workers are plain. We remember the hot ones. Most sex workers get by on availability). Because of that if you’re with one of these guys and your basic you get more approaches. Clubbing with one of those guys is like the ugly girl hanging with chicks that make her look hot in comparison. It’s a great set up.

Mr. Richie - One of my bosses is a Mr. Richie, guys who spend so much per trip they could have a bacchanal at any club on the planet. Being around them gets you section flooded with staff and dancers just by being next to the guy. I’ve also noticed the tend ti stay off of the annoying pitfalls I listed earlier because they are better to and about people and have too much too loose to try any nonsense. Plus they can pay to get whatever they want, most dancers have a price.

Ms. H.U.T.H. - Thats Hung Up The Heels, former dancers who know the struggle and tend not to screw people over or waste dancers time. In my experience even ex dancers that aren’t good company generally tend to be good company ITC as a customer with good insight, no jealousy and no drama.

Mr. Pro - There are always guys who really know what to do and what you can do in the club and really know how to maximize a good time. Or at least who do things the way I like them to be done. Finding people with the same club flow as you is hard. I’d rather skip the drama instead of looking for diamonds in the rough. Picking strippers is kinda like that too.

And alot of guys see themselves as a pro when they aren’t. It’s like dancers who claim they get stacks to dress men down and call them out when we all know they’re doing everything but that. Truth is some of the guys we see in the club getting robbed, thinking they are winning a game that’s only in their head, and generally looking silly have to think they’re killing it. And why get into that? I’m fine flying solo.