Is it cheating to have sex with a Stripper if your married
gilk
The simple answer of "yes it is wrong" comes from generations of brain washing and teaching where people live in a world of monogamy. We are suppose to find one person in this world and commit ourself whole to that one person (whether that person is beneficial or detrimental to your own mental health.) The automatic response of saying something like this is wrong comes from everyone in the world assuming it is wrong based on ethics that we did not create ourselves. You can say "well if it feels wrong than it must be wrong" and you would have a valid point. However, why is it little kids are so mischievous? Why do kids torture and humiliate other without regard to "feelings"? It could be that they do not know any better and that has been the eternal response. Or it could be that kids are running on the primal instincts of human nature and that they haven't been brain washed into "knowing better". All the views, ethics, rules, and perceptions we have are brought about by society, government, and others who feel they have the higher authority to determine the way we live our lives. So to sum up your quick, preconceived answer of "Yes", who is really answering the question? Do you personally feel its wrong or have you been programed to think that way?
Now that you can open your mind, is it truly wrong to have sex with a stripper? You are not making love to this women, you will hopefully never this women again (Not in my particular case where she ended up being my girlfriend's best friend's best friend. Imagine how awkward that was to see her at my GF's best friend's birthday.) On top of it all, you were satisfying a need that perhaps you couldn't get from your partner or a curiosity that you may be done with. Chances are that this was a decision you made after a long business day, stressful day at work, or pure sporadic thought as you drove past a place called Blue Moon adult club. This should be seen as that occasional night you just go out to get wasted with the boys after a long time of not seeing them. Something of an enjoyable sin that once completed you can continue to live your daily life. Relieving yourself here can get it all out and relax your thought so when you do get home to your wife or GF or whatever you have at home, your not at their throat threatening to end up as another crazy couple where one killed the other on the daily news. It should not be a broken thing to want to "smash" a hot, half naked or fully naked girl dancing allover you. It shouldn't be obscure to watch Tammy suck and fondle whatever you want her to. It would only be unnecessary if you don't use protection. Whatever happens at these places, should just stay at these places, BOTTOM LINE.
It is not wrong to explore others in a facility that you pay to do so. It is a mutual agreement between two parties. But do not ever be the guy who brings this stuff home. (unless you have someone that is also into that then send me a message anytime ;)) People shouldn't be spending $7,000 in a single sitting if you only make $800 every other week. That is just irresponsible. I know we all want to be the ballar at the club and you can not resist when you get all this attention from girls you may have thought were always out of you league. But you need to remember this is a game, a constant bid so to speak. They offer a price and you offer a bid to that price. The negotiations depends on how desperate the girl wants the money and how good looking you are as well. Again, always use protection.
The absolute bottom line is you should never walk away from a club feeling disappointed with what happened in there. Be smart, be safe, and enjoy yourself. At the end of the day these places are set up so that you can enjoy your time and that is why you came. So I believe it is not cheating to have sex with a stripper, it is simply practice or an opportunity to really enjoy yourself or even a chance to reevaluate your relationship at home.
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...or we can just admit that it is and learn to live with it. ;)
Unless she has given you the go-ahead to fuck other women, then it is cheating. This is coming from a guy who routinely does so with strippers all over the country. Man up and be honest with yourself. And if you are too emotionally delicate to wrap your arms around the fact that you are a cheating dog, then maybe you should stop fucking strippers.
Thanks for sharing. :)
Whether that is moral or immoral is between you, your wife, and whatever higher power or moral authority you believe in. I certainly hope that this board is neither to you.
That’s what commitment is supposed to be – don’t do the crime if you can’t do the time.
Would you be ok w/ your mate banging other guys whenever she was in the mood to do so?
In life – we often have to choose b/w doing what we want to do and doing what we have-to/should do – can’t have the cake and eat it too; i.e. marriage/commitment and banging all you want on the side.
So is it wrong – yeah – IMO – but let he who is w/o sin cast the first stone – but the fucked up part about it is that when one cheats on a person; one is directly screwing-up/affecting another person – it’s not as other things that primarily only affect the person performing the inappropriate act.
Hey gilk, is it still not cheating if you bring home herpes and infect your wife?
It's like a big ginormous elephant in the room and we're supposed to say we don't see it?
I spent some time thinking about how I would approach this and thought about this one like...
Cheating.
Under moral codes defined by a society, cheating is a type of conduct that is considered bad, in the sense the result could be harmful.
But let us qualify cheating leading to a harmful result.
Does having sex to dancer lead to harm. Who gets harmed?
Again, phrasing the question, what if nobody gets harmed? Is the act of cheating considered bad?
Society typically has a line that is a set rule. Most people agree to follow that line. There are people that do not follow it and this is a perfect example. Doe that make you a rule breaker? Maybe. I would bet most of American society male and female would agree it's cheating. The prude wives would be to the extreme right adding more rules that constitute "cheating" where as a typical member on this board may learn more to the left making amendments to situations that are considered cheating by most others.
Again, this is going to get circular because no one is citing about the common law.
And if there is a common law for cheating, how does it translate to a population under jurisdiction of law.
So, say what you wanna say and claim like it is enforceable, like there is an external that is going to convict the cheater.
Going back to the argument, the basis of cheating must be defined not at the level where two parties shake hands and agree, but a rule of conduct that is surrounded by a law that is enforceable.
I ask the dancer for sex and she said yes. Or, the dancer asked me for sex and I said yes.
We only know for a fact that we going to have sex, this knowledge is just between the two of us.
Later on, the sex act was committed and the exchange was made after the fact.
No one knew about the act except me and the dancer.
Did it harm anyone?
No one was harmed.
I went to the parlor to have my hair cut by this awesome looking lady.
She touched my head and massaged it so good it like we were in the moment.
I paid her the amount plus some tip.
When I was about to leave she gave a nice eye-fucking look.
I winked back at her and she smiled back.
Did I cheat?
No one was harmed.
The explanation is like this:
(1) There is only the contract.
(2) Only two parties enter an agreement.
(3) Two parties agree because there is a common law stating such-and-such.
(4) You only cause harm when the act committed was designed to harm.
(5) As long as the intent is not cause harm, then it is still good.
And yes, I know what a lucky man I am.
a couple caveats....
-play extremely safe- getting an STD would suck, giving one to your wife because you were too dumb to wrap your willy with Trixie the stripper....that's awful.
-if you don't have the stomach for it (the fact you posted this here tells me you probably don't) don't do it.
-as mentioned by others....do not share your number with the pay for play girl. If you cant bang a girl and not call her/want to call her later, don't do it.
Try that in divorce court and see how it works out
It might make your wife less likely to settle with you though and that could get expensive. That is why you need to keep it very private. Why would you tell her about something that does not effect your feelings for her or the way you feel about the marriage? You (and your wife) are entitled to some privacy in your relationship.
If the spouse agrees, not.
If the spouse participate, not.
I miss my dancer days: I used to bring fellow dancers from time to time for threesomes with me and the husband.
I have never cheated on my wife.
An implicit part of the sexual exclusivity covenant in marriage is an agreement that each spouse will meet the others sexual needs. Indeed, it makes no sense to agree that you will only be with one person sexually for the rest of your life, unless it is also understood that this person agrees to reasonably meet their spouses sexual needs. If one spouse breaks this covenant, ie refuses to meet their spouses reasonable sexual needs repeatedly over many years, then I don't consider it cheating if the rejected spouse turns to others to meet the need that their spouse repeatedly refuses to satisfy.
Of course, my wife and most women would disagree, and apply a strict no sex outside of marriage no matter what the circumstances rule. However, many of these same women consider pornography, lap dances, or even going to a strip club, to be cheating as well. When I got married, I didn't agree to give up sex. I only agreed to get my sex from my wife. How can I keep that commitment when she refuses sex?
When I got married, I never expected that I would ever reach the point where I would seek out sex from other women. Of course, I also never expected that my wife would loose interest in sex and repeatedly refuse even the most basic sexual requests. I don't consider fucking strippers to be cheating under these circumstances.
If you disagree and want to call what I do cheating even under these circumstances, that's fine. I understand that is the answer that our feminist culture demands. But I plan to keep having a sex life, and for now that means that I need to keep having sex with strippers no matter what label is attached such action.
What a moron. If you make a commitment, then stick to it. Otherwise you have no ethics and no honor.
If you want to be able to sleep with whoever you want, then don't make a fucking commitment, idiot! There are plenty of guys these days who are open about the fact that they won't be monogamous. And they still find girls who will sleep with them, sometimes even marry them! It's a personal choice, as long as it's founded on honesty.
So if you are in a committed relationship and you're not getting the sex you want, then break up with her! Be a fucking man and live life honestly and openly, not like a rat in the sewer. All you have to do is say "Babe, this isn't working for me. I need more in my sex life, and what we've got going here isn't enough, and I don't think it ever will be. I'm going to start seeing other women." Maybe she'll accept an open relationship, but that's totally up to her. If she needs monogamy, then tell her to find it with some other guy.
Have some fucking integrity.
However, cheating does not bother me.
For a web site and forum that is full of strip club goers and a few strippers, we sure have a bunch of puritans on our hands.
So many of you are so FOS. I mean that with no disrespect, I certainly am. "Ive never cheated.' "id never cheat." "XYZ is cheating." "I made a vow."
Lol. Cmon people. You go to strip clubs so much, you joined a web site to review them and talk about them.
Its OK to be honest.