My Top Three Awesome Stripper Types

19 comments

• mjx01

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  13 years ago

  The best is when you hit the trifecta of all three qualities listed... as was my xATF.
• JuiceBox69

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  13 years ago

  Damn !
• mjx01

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  13 years ago

  well said juice :)
• EarlTee

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  13 years ago

  > A stripper that would be a "10" in literally every > man's eyes There is no such person.
• jackslash

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  13 years ago

  sucker4ladies: "First, let me say that I do not engage in OTC activities with strippers, or indulge in "extras" in the club. (I do not desire to contract an STD or father a child by someone who tells me their name is "Cherry"." NEWSFLASH! There is a fantastic new invention called a condom which protects against unwanted pregnancy and STDs.
• canny

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  13 years ago

  Yep, they're about 85% effective too. Trust me on this one, condoms leak.
• bang69

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  13 years ago

  if a person doen't want to engage in itc/otc with a stripper thats there choice. Respct the person for that. Canny you are correct on the condom issue
• gsv

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  13 years ago

  Beyond the fact that condoms leak, they don't help much (sometimes not at all basically) for HSV-2 (genital herpes) or HPV (genital warts).
• Stiletto25

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  13 years ago

  @Earltee- Isn't that the truth.
• CTQWERTY

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  13 years ago

  Strippers Are Awesome!
• Horatius

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  13 years ago

  I met a girl that was the absolute description of point 2 just the other night. When she came on stage I thought "meh", average looking, other assets not remarkable, but holy sexychick batman! She knew exactly what to do, how to make a gentleman feel like he was the only one there. She exuded sexiness and made herself go from being "meh" to all-world dancer. In my experiences the point 2 dancer is the extremely rarest of rare.
• Book Guy

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  13 years ago

  There are definitely "types" or groups of strippers, categories into which my mind cubby-holes the dancers I look at or meet. I think I know what the original poster means by his categories. But I think a little bit differently. To me, there are really two different methods to categorize the girls, and for me to be interested, she has to meet my standards when I categorize her by both methods. 1. Criterion number one. Physical. Is she "hot enough." The answer must be "yes" or "probably yes." There are an awful lot of women out there who get the "no" response automatically. Most of them seem to be dancing. :P 2. Criterion number two. Interpersonal / character / intelligence / conversation / etc.. Again, she must fulfill the "yes" in this criterion as well, but (as the original poster mentioned) there are different "types" who can be either "yes" or "no." (And by the way, criterion two -- character -- can NEVER trump a failure in criterion one -- physically hot enough.) First type can be the "honest", as mentioned originally. Second type can be the "skilled", as mentioned originally again. But those two types can be one-and-the-same, to me. I put them into my category of: The dancer who will manipulate you physically in the way that you want, and in the way that you have a "right" to expect. Of course, this is all judgment call, and is partly (entirely?) based on what is reasonable IN A GIVEN CLUB and AT A GIVEN PRICE and IN A GIVEN CITY and WITH A PARTICULAR DANCER etc. etc.. So you can't really "demand" exactly the physical contact and activity you "rightly" expect. But when a dancer is good at customer service, generally she's honest about what you'll get and she's also able to give it to you. She doesn't mislead, and she doesn't fail to deliver, precisely because she's an able-bodied decent businesswoman. So, for me, the original "honest" and the original "skilled" fall into my own "able." There are other types which I'ven oticed, take 'em for what they're worth. Not saying this is all the types, nor that all dancers fit these types exactly. These are just some general observations. New other types of dancers include: The ingenue. This is the new kid on the block, a little wide-eyed and a little intimidated. You can probably get her to really go over the top if you help her get intoxicated, preferably in a club where she's roughly comfortable and where you have been a regular or at least a trusted customer for some time, so the other dancers can "shepherd" her over to you if they know she needs to be "broken in." I've had this enjoyable experience a few times, memorably at Visions in New Orleans, at Ybor Strip in Tampa, and at Fantasia in Richmond Hill (near Toronto). You won't get the most "skilled" lap-dance from the girl, since she is probably going to know very few tricks of the trade. But you will get more "interpersonal" connection, since she's relying (though she probably doesn't know it) on the customer to put her at her ease. The substance abuser. This girl is drunk / stoned / tweaking / whatever well beyond anything interesting. I can't tell you much more about her, I don't spend time with her. The over-the-hill. Physically inadequate (see my criterion number one, above) and in denial. Or simply desperate for money. The rocker / biker / goth / tattoo-canvas / tougher-than-you. These girls have something to prove, generally are angry with men (and probably with women, too), and will chitty-chat in a sweet way but then suddenly turn an unpredictable about-face and "catch you out" in a conversation. They'll pick one misrepresentative sentence or comment, decide to be pissed off and offended by it, and get huffy and aggressive about everything you say in the hopes of making you feel weak and abused. Your best solution is to call them on it. [Example: Me -- hey, you're hot. Her -- howdy cutie wanna dance? Me -- in a minute, I'm just finishing up my drink her. So, do you work here often? Her -- (about-face!) You call this "work" do you? What makes you think I don't enjoy it? Why do you call it "work" and not "play"? Disapproval? Envy? Me -- uh, well, do you DANCE here often? Her -- (still aggressive) You didn't fuckin' see me DANCE did you? You weren't even paying attention! ][Potential solution: Me -- You like nit-picking words, hunh? I bet your last boyfriend donkey-punched you for that kind of shit. That's what I do when my girlfriend mouthes off like that. ] I don't enjoy these types of interactions but I am sometimes called on them -- maybe not to the extreme that my (admittedly poorly written, over-the-top) example suggests. It's a "necessary" type of bluster in some strp clubs, especially the more "neighborhood" type places. In New Orleans, a customer can get this A LOT at Visions, but NEVER at a French Quarter middle-class-white club. The ditz. Probably does not have excellent hearing, so comes across in the noise club environment as a lot stupider than she really is. Maybe it's just an act, this ditz thing. Maybe it's for real. Doesn't matter, it's cute. :) Problem is, usually it doesn't translate to cute or even capable lap-dancing. I usually find, that if the girl comes across as a bimbo, ditz, dumb-blonde, frivolous flighty little "girlish" thing, then she isn't going to pay proper attention during that $20-per-rock-song job that she does in the VIP booth. And given that $20-per-rock-song is $300-per-hour, she ought to earn her keep a bit more responsibly. It would be nice to believe that the ditz would be just as charmingly girlish and sweet in the back, but she never is, not in my experience. The slut / gimme. Once in a while a gal just wants her hands all over a guy. It has to be the right kind of guy for the gal, and there's not really any way to bring that sort of thing about except to just wait for it to happen, but it's great when it does. I got lucky with this, about two months ago. A gal who does dance off-and-on, but can't be said to "be a stripper" in the standard meaning of the term, was working. I'd interacted with her before, she and I were cool with each other and got along. She got a little tipsy, had some rules about minimum number of dances she had to perform to meet club requirements, and so just demanded that we go to the private booths. No charge. We made out, she grinded, we covered about ten songs, I bought her some drinks (for which the price was considerably lower, by about a power of ten and then some, relative to what the dances would have cost). Excellent experience. I would have said that I wish I could replicate it more regularly, except it's also kind of all up-in-your-face. If you wanted to hang with your bachelor buddies that night, but the dancer wanted to make out with you, then you would have had to foresake one or the other.
• steve229

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  13 years ago

  @ Book Guy. I was with you until your very last sentence. Hang with your buddies vs. making out with a dancer - how is that even a choice?
• Book Guy

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  13 years ago

  @steve ... You'se picks whichevers you picks. But my point would still be valid, that if you DO get yourself a "gimme" dancer, there will be the disadvantage of missing out on whatever else is going on. Related point: For me, by the way, hanging with a big rowdy crowd of supposed-buddies who are being sloppy-drunk all over themselves is seldom enjoyable. I'm usually intimidated and silenced by the crowded rowdy nature of the evening, and they're often upbraiding me for failing in their expectation that I "let loose" (by which, usually, they mean, "act even stupider than me, so that I don't feel quite as guilty as I do right now for the fact that I'm acting really stupid"). Ever noticed how drunken wastrels insist on sharing their inebriation? Misery loves company ... :P So I guess I have the misfortune that my friends or acquaintances tend to be unenjoyable to me during strip-clubbing. Not that they don't have other advantages, just sayin' ...
• Clubber

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  12 years ago

  Makes me wonder how one would ever get with a #2. If, "Age, fitness level, breast size, hair color, ethnicity, etc" don't matter, then why would one even go to a club? Cheaper to walk a mall and look. And if in a club, why would you even hook up with a dancer that has no traits that interest you? Does she walk up and her "vibe" sells her to you? Just makes no sense, IMHO.
• Reddbehrens

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  12 years ago

  My favorite is the "Sexy MILF".
• pigheadjock

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  12 years ago

  Whomever participates in illegal "extras" at any club deserves to contract an STD. Strippers are fun, but I'm not sticking my dick in any of them.
• glenlivet

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  12 years ago

  pighead. true that. But I could put my cock between those tits and spew all over that neck.
• pleaserlove

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  12 years ago

  I am the rare form... 6 ft tall... long tan legs, dark hair and eyes... bronze skin... I will show you if you don't believe me;) maybe that is why I take home the most money every night I work... I am 26.. not wonder woman on the pole, but I have a few tricks up my sleeve.. I give a private dance so rich, you will ask for more than just one:)