Strip Club Changes...and maybe changes in me too

19 comments

• StormShadow760

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  14 years ago

  Great post, luckyone! I'm in my early 30's, but a lot of the things you've mentioned in here really hit home...I had a post a few weeks ago where I talked about a dancer/friend who I've gone on many friendly "dates" with, only to have her tell me that she was pregnant with some other guy's baby. For a moment, I'd actually thought our "relationship" was going to that next level only to be struck down by the news. It depressed me because I couldn't see it coming, but at least I learned a personal lesson from it. I could never be more than a friend with a girl who does this for a living...and I would be wise to keep any interaction I have with them strictly a fantasy and nothing more.
• spandexman

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  14 years ago

  Great post. I remember going to the clubs since the 70s and thought I would get Lucky with a pretty girl in my 20s, but soon realized they were there to hustle us, and the few kind women had baggage or bad drug habits. I have now grown older, and a little wiser. Take in a club and enjoy the show, and take it for sexual entertainment.
• feelmore

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  14 years ago

  Many of your comments and observations ring true with me, too, Luckyone. I've visited strip clubs all over the USA for over 35 years. In my younger days, when the dancers were about my age, I held out some hope (fantasy) that I might strike up a relationship with one of them for some OTC action. What could be better than to have a hot stripper girlfriend for some extra-curricular activities? I soon learned, however, that getting involved with a stripper is a mistake. You just can't have a genuine relationship with a girl who works in the sexual fantasy industry. With rare exceptions, they see you as a customer and source of income; nothing more. It's that simple. Now that I'm older, the dancers are much younger than me. I no longer hold out any expectation that they will view me as a BF candidate. The most I can expect is perhaps Sugar Daddy status. But, you know, that's OK with me. I go to strip clubs to get away from the real world for a while and enjoy a sexual fantasy with a young gal who has a smokin' hot body. I'm too old to have a GFE with a 20 or 30 something girl in the real world. Those days are behind me now. But, for a few bucks, I can relive some of the days gone by. I often hit the strip clubs in the late afternoon. Looking around the club I notice that many of the men are older, middle aged men just like me. The young, good looking studs get all the action they want for free (or at least they think it's free. Remember guys, nobody rides for free.) The older guys may have lost their youthful good looks, but they've got something the younger guys often lack...$$$CASH. So now, I accept that I have to pay to get a hot 20 yo to give me a lap dance instead of getting some for "free" at the end of a date. Strip clubs are a fast, efficient way to get a little action and still be home by 9 pm. Long gone are the days of chasing tail until the bars close and then getting up bright and early the next morning to go to work. I'll leave that territory to you young guys. Maybe the dancers haven't changed that much, Luckyone. Maybe it's we who have changed....and perhaps our age and experience make us more realistic about the whole SCE. At least that's the way I see it. I could be wrong....
• lvlap123

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  14 years ago

  Very nice post and some of it rings true for me as well. Maybe those of who frequent strip clubs do it either as a an escape or with some kind of a dream/fantasy. On couple of occasions I thought I "clicked" but only to realize otherwise in due time. Now I am middle aged and more skeptical than hopeful and don't take chances. Everything changes including our attitude and probably dancers too especially if they have been dancing for a while (no offense).
• hayleydog

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  14 years ago

  I can't believe how blind you guys are. Those strippers don't see you as friends, all they see are dollar signs. That "lunch date" was just a free meal to her. You are just someone she knows she can hit up for money if she finds herself in a pinch. If you have to turn to a stripper for friendship you have to be ONE PATHETIC LOSER !!!!!
• LeeH

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  14 years ago

  hayleydog, Dougster. Dougster, hayleydog. You guys enjoy my iggy list.
• ArchiePitcar

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  14 years ago

  This is an interesting discussion. I'm starting to have "friend" issues with some of the dancers in my favorite club. They are the older ones, close to my age (one of them even a couple years older). They're the ones who will come up and want to talk, and we'll have a drink or whatever. But I find that I'm not really attracted to them to the point of even wanting a lap dance. Then there's the younger generation of dancers there, some of whom are very hot and almost all of whom seem to have serious issues. So I've come up with a strategy where I'll pay one of the older ones for a LD, but instead of having her dance, I'll point out one of the young hotties and ask her to bring said hottie over. It seems to usually work pretty well. Grown-up conversation at the bar, a social drink, a little window shopping, choose what you want, have it delivered, head back to the VIP and leave happy. A bit pervy, I know, but I think everyone gets something they want out of it.
• skibum609

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  14 years ago

  Is there a possibility that the clubs and the dancers themselves haven't changed at all, but as you have aged and gained more life experience your perception of them has changed? After 35 years of strip clubbing the only changes I have seen has been the level of contact in clubs, especially here in Massachusetts. Thirty years ago if you brushed a dancers leg puttinga dollar in her garter you'd get your arm broken. Now they're doing full nude full contact laps with the possibility of extras in the exact same club. My last club experience was Monday. 10 dancers on the shift, 9 below age 23.
• stag0069

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  14 years ago

  Yes, strip clubs and girls have changed due to the poor economy. It's not just you. Let go of the fantasy game and build real Game instead with real women. Take a look at the pickup artists online for training.
• Player11

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  14 years ago

  With all the opportunities these gals have from the multitudes of customers coming in a club its a fools errand to try to develop any kind of normal relationship. It will drain your wallet. Many are biased against men they meet at SC's as being what they call PL's. This became evident reading some of the posts on SW by some of them. They sell a fantasy, even the one I have been seeing otc for 2 yr. While it can be great private session photo shoots / sex, at the end of the day, if your cash has run out, they have no use for you. What they do be it stripping / hooking or both is a business. Your merely a customer. There are married onew who play their husband they are the good, faithful wife while they are out hooking with customers they picked up at the SC.
• georgmicrodong

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  14 years ago

  I haven't noticed much in the way of change in the clubs themselves. For as long as I've been going, it's always been possible to get more than what's advertised out front, if you were willing to put forth the effort. What *has* changed is the effort required. Less now than it was 30+ years ago, but all the same items are pretty much still on the menu. The prices have just gone down, and you don't have to tip the maitre de quite as much to get in the door.
• rickdugan

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  14 years ago

  Now I will readily admit that I also sometimes miss aspects of those days, which I caught the tail end of while I started up in this hobby. But there are a lot of things about those days that I don't miss. I don't miss the hustle aspect of those days, where in some areas there was so much money chasing the girls that if you weren't spending very large sums of money on a girl then you were nothing more than a club spectator. I also don't miss the blatant scams run by some of the clubs back then, when it could be pulled off with much more ease than today. Also, back then not only were the girls skilled in the art of seduction, but a % of those girls were also masters in the art of the long con. I saw more then one guy spend himself into bankruptcy chasing the elusive affections of a masterful stripper, where her feelings for him would increase in proportion to his ITC and OTC spending. Cars, jewelry, expensive trips, guys flying in from out of town just to spend time with them, I witnessed a lot more of these things than I would have imagined. I don't miss seeing this either. The clubs have changed and, with money more scarce, the balance of power has certainly shifted more in favor of the men. I'm just not convinced that all of the changes are so bad.
• farmerart

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  14 years ago

  I am an old guy who is new to the hobby. My first SC visit was in April, 2010 (apart from business related visits in the 70s and 80s) so I have no comparisons to make. I really like things the way they are now. I am working my way through my first infatuation with a dancer. It has been great fun but I can see that my run with her is soon done. Like the boy in the candy store I am getting tired of licorice jawbreakers and will soon move on to pineapple lifesavers. But I surely want to sample every flavour in the store!
• neon730

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  14 years ago

  I will just add this little bit of info. My wife is a former dancer, we met through mutual friends and it was several weeks before I knew where she worked. When I first saw her dance, I kept my distance and watched her ply her trade, the difference between Vianca and "Cinnamon" was so striking that I still find it hard to believe. Everything in, or out of the club with a customer, is a business transaction. Dancers are working to pay the bills and support the kids, if it is away from the club, she does not have to give a cut the owner. The biggest difference between the girls from 20 years ago to now, is the lack of training and professionalism, and the fact that meth costs a lot less than cocaine. Please follow my advice and as another said earlier, work on your confidence and meet someone anywhere but a club.
• luckyone

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  14 years ago

  Well, this posting certainly got a lot of responses. I guess I kind of expected that. I think there might have been some confusion and, as I re-read what I wrote, I can see why. When I was talking about friends who wanted to be more than friends, I wasn't actually talking about dancer friends. These are just "regular" girls. That being said, the dancer "friends" I have are almost exclusively women I haven't spent a dime on or at least ones I haven't spent a dime on in quite some time. If they are still dancing somewhere I frequent, I might buy them a drink or tip them on stage but they all know I'm not going to buy any dances from them. Truthfully, only a couple of them could reasonably be considered more than acquaintances. That being said, I'll stand by my assertion that the women in clubs used to be hotter and the fantasy was better than the reality of "hooking up" with someone inside or outside the club.
• ilbbaicnl

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  14 years ago

  You must have some kind of "social" skills, because I've spent $100+ on many dancers, and could count on one hand the number who wanted to see me OTC, even in a non-sexual way. <br> Maybe you should try just working it into the conversation with dancers early on some of the things you've said here. The airheads may not get the message, but many dancers are very adept at seeming to be exactly what you want. But say it more like "10 or 15 years ago there were more dancers who where incredibly hot-looking like you are...".
• ilbbaicnl

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  14 years ago

  Testing &lt br &gt tag:<br><br>XXX If there's a blank line before the 3 Xes it worked. (Leave out space before after "br" in tag.)
• Rufus3Firefly

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  14 years ago

  I have more to say on this subject than I really have time to write about it. I don't think the overall average experience at clubs has changed except to have loosened up a bit. I think the experience varies a bit from club to club, geographically and, most of all, whether you become a regular. Even then, if a club is extremely busy, the dancers aren't necessarily able to spend a lot of time with someone unless it's for additional paid dances. But, as I said, it may depend on the club and especially the dancer. About 6 months ago a hot dancer gave me free dances and offered to meet me outside the club in various contexts. I'm not stupid, I know she was making a long term investment. An investment that was only a little bit of her time in the club but with much more money to be made outside the club. I got a couple of free ones but insisted on paying for most of them. Another time a dancer jumped on my lap and said "why haven't you called me ?" Me: "uh, I don't have your number." She: "Do you want it ?" During subsequent club visits she would discuss anal sex during the lap dance and a meeting at the bar turned into a discussion of personal sexual preferences plus her phone number.
• macaffluent

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  14 years ago

  Like a few others, I have visited the clubs for 30+ years, so I have seen it all. However, my experiences are quite different. In my area thirty years ago, there was no such thing as a lap dance, instead the customer bought the dancer a drink, received a happy ending, then gave a her a $20 tip. The girls were young, very young. I had OTC relationships with several and it was quite routine. The price ranged from $50 to $100 and they were mostly teenagers, my preference. I dated one from age 16 to 28, but that was unusual. In those days owners looked the other way and bouncers always seemed absent when the action was going on. All of that is in sharp contrast to what I see going on in the current environment. Admittedly, I am much older now and the "ymmv" factor may come into play, but then and now it is all about money and I don't think the age thing matters that much. I never got into the fantasy aspect that so many talk about. It is good to see the exchange of ideas and experiences. That is what the forum is all about.