Comments by David9999 (page 6)

correction: "I wasn't abused." (period)

njsfan - I wasn't "abused"? There are no victims here. The lady had a bad day and was feeling old, and I tried to help her forget it. Look, $5000 for me is probably like what 50 dollars or maybe 500 dollars for you. So when you drop your 50 bucks or 500 bucks or whatever, YOU'RE the chump too. Its entertainment and we pay money, its not a big deal.

First of all I'm usually about 80% gentlemen and 20% horndog and the horndog thing is nearly always between me and the dancers with maybe some spillover as one might interact with a dancers friends etc, and I'm never had any club employees get angry at me like that. Second, any dancer hanging around me (because I make sure its the case) is earning lots of money, so I like to help out people in the club who don't typically make the big dollars, including bartenders, timekeepers, waitresses, bouncers, and even DJs, who by the way in 1 or 2 clubs I've paid quite large amounts to a number of times. That particular bartender's reaction was a complete surprise and seem to come out of nowhere and no doubt she must have heard what that particular very popular young dancer had earned off me (approx 3500 with the club taking about 1500) in a fairly short time and (to much smaller extent) probably few thousand or so off some other (mostly)10 to 20 non-VIP random clients over a month or slightly more, and this bartender was feeling old (as absurd as that sounds at 28) and she just started unloading on me for basically no reason, Hey I was a convenient target and 20 dollars defused it. You do what works in life. I could care less whether this bartender was or was not turned on by me, but to the tell you the truth, as most people understand passion of any type can be a good sign - if a man is looking for a woman to actually be turned on. Indifference would have more troubling in that situation, and I can tell you this bartender was definitely not indifferent toward me.

I guess it was resolved what last week? or last month? The "nice guy" issue has never been resolved. You're reading too much bullshi.t from so-called "relationships experts" on Yahoo or AOL or somewhere else. Note as additional proof the fact that the Yahoo author herself was claiming to be offering some NEW insight. Why would it be new if the issue were already resolved? Confidence as an added factor will not overcome the LACK of (what I refer to as) "negative" Alpha traits such as deception, nonmonogamy, a generalized disrespect toward females, controlling behavior, or in some cases a predisposition toward violence - all by the way critical for long term genetic survival success in evolutionary terms

correction: "my most important ($$$ wise) ATF type dancer...

"High end players are getting the shit cracked out of them" Bonuses next year will be either non-existence or drastically reduced -that's the word. What most people don't realize is typically (on average) 40% of any bonus goes directly to pay fed and state taxes. Its true the squeeze will begin to hit these dancers from both ends. Over the past year, I would definitely be in the top 1% in terms of spending (my most important ($$$ wise) actually purchased a house for a relative in another country) but this upcoming year I will cut way back, and even though as a percent of net income and net worth its not that big a deal for me, I've figure I've taken a hit of at least 200k to 300k in terms of the dollar vs the euro based upon money market cash I hold, and I also got hit real bad on the alt min tax for 2007 with total fed taxes paid well over 6 figures, and with Obama almost sure to get in, that means probably another 10k to 30k in taxes next year because he's going to "tax the rich", plus people like me pay 100% of college tuition, no grants or other subsidies others get. Bill Gates is rich and there's alot of us very low end so-called "rich" with huge taxes paid every year, and I cannot hide behind untaxed deferred capital gains the way Gates and Buffet do. I gotta pay every year at 40% on the dollar beyond a certain point I ran a calculation the other day, and what I paid just in tips over the past year came out to just over 5 figures, which I think is way more than most strip clug patrons spend on regular charges in clubs each year Fortunately I carry almost no debt, but when patrons like me get real worried, dancers might want to start looking for real jobs.

I don't recall the James Bond part. However, if you add the horndog vibe thing (anyone can do this) and (for those able) throw the money around a bit, you will find some very interesting things happening with dancers, or with other classes of women if that's your thing. As for BookGuy - sometimes you need to look at what you've got, not what you don't have. You're an american (a huge advantage in the world today) and you are obviously bright and inqusitive, and I presume you have your health. As for your "poverty weight", 3 or 4 miles a day of walking and running mos days of the week and some free weights will do wonders, plus if you have depression it going to cut it down probably 50% at least.

The "nice guy" issue has discussed for decades and its a real issue for many males, and to claim that its all really just about a lack of confidence - well that is absurd. If the issue were really that simple, it would be 100% resolved today, and few would even have the need to discuss it.

"It's cash. How could they prove anything" Basically the IRS examines the lifestyle and works backwards. They look at where you live, what kind of car you drive, whether you take fancy vacations, credit card bills, furniture you have, and 99 other factors. IRS agents are not idiots, and if a dancer who has not filed or is suspected of significantly underreporting income gets audited, the IRS can make them show the sources of nearly everything they bought or rented or even gave away in last 1 to 5 years of longer. They have formulas they've developed over the years that are used to prove fraud in criminal cases -and the courts in general have backed up these methodologies. ,

"Nice guys" with or w/o confidence - are generally (IMHO) perceived in a bio-chemical sense by females as evolutionary dead-ends, all of this operating at the genetic subconscious level. Fondl, a few decades back I pretty much (by accident) tested out whether a confident (and monogamous, sincere, non-controlling) "nice guy" could really sustain the interest of hot women. Yes, you'll get plenty of dates, but holding onto them is another matter. Yes, at some point (as even I found out) an "I don't give a flying fuc.k" attitude helps, but that's getting close to a nonmongomous attitude anyways. I would argue that the (confident too) nonmonogamous rogue is contantly sending out the signal at the genetic perception level of offering the exciting promise of genetic immortality. Once again this is all perception and has nothing do with reality, but what matters to genes it what they "believe" not what IS, and there is little doubt that all this female "chemistry" is tied into early primordial periods(99.999% of man's existence on earth) when in fact Alpha seed spreaders were able IN FACT to offer genetic survival advantages for the famales. It would be great if social scientists could run a series of (all things otherwise equal) tests of confident nice guys matched against the confident rogues with various attractive women - the nice guys would w/o any doubt would get slaughtered in terms of pushing the "chemistry" up. The problem with such a test of course is that it could never merely depend upon what women SAID they liked (nearly all women claim and and actually believe they like "nice guys") - instead it would have to depend upon what they reponded to in a substantive way, thus there are some very serious ethical issues about tricking women into falling "in love" and most likely having sex with a man who is actually part of an experiment.

True, and the real problem is its an article that's really about why women are turned off by wimpy nice men and yet pretends to be about the (often discussed) mainstream issue of the "why women are turned off by nice guy" - yet claims to have some special new insight - when if offers none.

Independent contractor status has held up nearly everywhere this has been litigated, but its just a matter of time before some club or group of club - loses such a case. A true independent contractor (e.g a plumber) would be able to work on Club A on Monday afternoon and Club B across the street on Tuesday afternoon - yet most clubs blacklist girls that try this. The (often 3 day) mandatory must-show days that most clubs use to always make sure there is a core group of dancers at any given time on the floor - also presents problems for independent contractor status. Also the common (in most clubs) mandatory stage calls during the shift is another problem, because its adds another layer of control on the dancer - and further suggests an employee/employer relationships. Today, for dancers that make the bigger money, lets say in the range of 50k to 100k or more per year, the current system with the lax tax enforcment is no doubt much better, because for example JUST the self-employment tax alone (off the top with no deduction before you hit regular fed or state tsxes) is 15.3% of over 15,000 dollars for a 100k earner -who would then typical pay another 10 to 20k in fed and state taxes. Why the IRS doesn't crack down on dancer's Im not sure.

Yup the story was too long, and I should add (and maybe this is from hanging out in strip clubs too much) but quite frequently I do get into what could only be described as manhandling (usually physically turning them around so their back is toward me with my hands around their waist and having 2 way conversations by me talking into their ear) with certain dancers and now and then waitresses - however only when I'm dropping fairly large amounts in fees or tips, and with waitresses only ones I know really well. The other case previously cited (forcible grabbing her hand and exerting pressure)that was done because I was a bit ticked off at that moment and a bit more force was applied than I probably should have used - so that's why I cited it in detail, however strip clubs really are an alternate reality in terms of the way one can manhandle dancers in a harmless w/o getting into too much trouble. To be honest most of these girls don't seem to even mind being manhandled in the club environment -Ok its sounds egotiscal but its exactly what I've sensed every single time I've done it. I think most are sick of our wussified culture males have been forced to worship and bow down to.

The problem is that different people use different definitions of "nice guy." If "nice guys" as a class truely just consisted of boring pushover marshmellows who ass-kiss and fawn over women (as the Yahoo article infers) - then by not doing those thing the problem is basically solved. However males who are that wussy cannot really change anyways, however in any case males that dysfunctional are irrelevant to the main issue and just confuse the ultimate issue. Sincerity, monogamy, respect toward women, and non-controlling behavior are in fact the key factors that make a woman call a guy a "nice guy" So by being nonmonogamous or putting out the vibe - one will pretty much have undone being a nice guy and probably counteracted 1 or 2 of the other (non-Alpha) traits

By the way, the POSITIVE Alpha attraction points are hardly controversial: for example looks, strength, height, intelligence, wealth and so forth, however aside from perceived nonmonogamy when dealing with (lets call them) the NEGATIVE Alpha attraction points sich as deception, egotistical behavior, disrespect toward females, controlling bahavior, or a propensity toward violence or physical force - most of these are highly impractical to use. Aside from the profound logic of seed spreading being a key Alpha factor in evolution, if only by default the vibe of nonmonogamy appears to be a superior strategy given the difficulty of working those other Alpha negative attraction points. Personally I don't have the stomach to lie to women or blatantly disrespect them, and since I focus on longer term relationships such lies eventually would get confusing as to what has been said and what hasn't, and as I've said before once you got the right horndog vibe thing going, they will accuse you of lying about other women and probably think you a bit disrespectful of women anyways, but that flows naturally from the horndog vibe. In regards to these NEGATIVE ALPHA traits I actually ended up (a bit unintentionally) ratcheting up a bit of the controlling behavior mixed in a small amount of physical force - with a certain dancer. However with dancers you of course take the risk of getting tossed out by bouncers if the dancer complains. I had just finished a week of multi-day (expensive in this club) VIPs with this hot young dancer completely new to the business and it was discussed and understood by both of us, that in that month I would concentrate on her. After arriving at the club early in afternoon on the first day of the 2nd week I premptively arranged for a VIP session with her by actually prepaying several hundred dollars (her portion) for 2 VIP sessions while she was still on the stage, and explaining to her what I had in mind. When she exited 10 minutes later she mentioned about possibly passing-thru another guy for 3 or 4 dancers, and (as I always do before such longer sessions start) I suggested dancers grab the money while they can before I tie them up for a few hours. So I waited for her for probably 20 minutes as the guy (not surprisingly given her hotness level) went a few extra dances. Apparently she didn't understand via the stage discussion that the pre-payment was 100% for her and therefore I was locking in multi-sessions VIPs and would pay (per my usual habit) the house portion directly myself once it was setup by the waitress/timer. So when she finished the dances with this guy, I got the impression (wrongly as I found out later) that he might be still looking for hang time after his dance because he had bought 4 or 5 dancers or whatever. All of this resulted in me (mistakenly as it turned out) getting the impression she was thinking down-the-road she was going to give the guy hang time. (When I spend large sums of money I actually do control the dancer, but that's not an Alpha thing per se, its just what I do and I make sure dollars keep flowing to them) So my response was to grab her hand very forcefully and hold it and tell her exactly what was going to occur, (something I would never normally do) because basically I didn't want this prick hanging around when I was taking her into 2 VIPs and maybe other VIPs beyond that plus I (not him) would be doing the in-between hang time thing. I must have held her hand forcefully for about 2 minutes and pretty much physically controlled her, and I even called the waitress/setup timer over to review the plan that was agreed to (on stage) and make sure everyone understood the plan now - as the waitress/timer as was customary needed to setup the VIP room first. Now those particular VIP sessions turned out even better than normal, as I was (somewhat by accident) handling her in a very forceful way. I could have easily been tossed out, but she didn't seem interested in complaining about any of it. Point it this was Alpha behavior and she responded, but its really not practical to use in many situations.

Chandler states: "men need to go after what they want like it's as necessary as eating and sleeping. Forget about what women want. You'll never find the answer, and speculating about it won't get you laid - it just gives you an excuse not to." Yahoo using a major lead-in earlier today addressed a similar issue with a supposed solution to the often talked about "nice guy" mystery with an article by an alleged female "relationship expert" -such article ending up as total bullshit - why shouldn't BookGuy be able to post similar questions in here? Maybe he's sick of the bullshit in the major media.

Many stripper do not seem to know what the term "IQ" even means, and I know this because with a number of different strippers (and these are the higher quality ones) I complimented them on their excellent EQ (people skills) and explained it was the social equivalent of IQ and multiple times these strippers had never heard the term IQ or simply didn't understand what it meant.

BookGuy brings up the very good issues, and in fact that kind of inquisitive mind can be very attractive to certain women - because its relatively rare these days in most males. In the case of american women, it does seem like he's pushed the edge as far as he can. The law school thing will help, but it doesn't seem like the kind ofwomen he's attracted to - are in turn attracted to him. The type of mental imaging I suggest for him is to imagine himself in China as a 5 ft 2 inch uneducated middle aged factory worker - and ask himself - who has the better chance with young hot asian women?

I always make the presumption that an ultra beautiful woman is a sociopath, which may or or may not actually be true, but I would guess statistically such a woman has a higher than normal probablity of being sociopathic relative to an average women. Sometimes their extraordinary beauty makes them believe they have a license to manipulate men in very cynical and arguably sociopathic ways.

Lets assume this Apha seed spreading cocept and related theories are just crap, any one know of any downside to putting out the "gentlemen horndog" vibe? There really isn't any except for one very minor exception. The one situation I know of is if you happen to run into a hypochondriac type female, if she gets anything (e.g a sore throat), and as I told her "no I don't have a sore throat and no I don't wake up in the middle of the night with a dry cough, or any cough for that matter" (100% true) - she might start making all sorts of medical accusations. This girl who is very very hot and very young but not blessed with much in the IQ department, and she was even showing me an incredibly tiny wart on her index finger as if I caused it, which she probably got from her pushing her IPOD too many times. Other than this one issue, there's really no downside to adding a bit of the horndog vibe thing.

The article in effect spins the "nice guy" definition to prove the point. The article is nonsense because it makes the standard presumption that the nice guy issue can be defined simply as an issue of nonconfident, wussy, marshmellow, pushover, doormat type males who ass-kiss women. This is a standard approach and has been used for many years by those trying to explain the issue. Yes, its true such marshmellow/wusses are also "nice guys" but they are a small subset of nice guys. Nice guys under any fair objective analysis are simply sincere, non-controlling, honest, monogamous, and non-controlling males. Yes, they generally respect women but they usually don't instantly worship the ground a women walks on because the women pays attention to them.

"I am not so sure it's non-monogamy which is as attractive to women as simply them knowing other women find you attractive. It's called preselection and is old news. Any proof that it's the non-monogamy and not just preselection that is attractive?" Once again; the horndog vibe was not there last summer, and it was there the last 6 months and this correlated with nearly the exact time she first began dropping all the explicit sexual hints (soon followed by actions). In fact I've asked her why the big change and she claims its because she is now "less shy" and she was "shy" last summer.

"I think you've so convinced yourself that EP and your own extensions are correct, that you see the world not really as it is but through a filter that tries to validate EP and your own dogma." WHERE'S YOUR EXPLANATION THEN FOR THE THE NICE GUY ISSUE THEN? YOU GOT A BETTER PREMISE? Scientists are not going to study this, so stop waiting for the studies. Everything I say is in good faith and my advice to Book Guy is a sincere attempt to help him, yup of coures I'm biased at this point, but no one knows who the hell I am per se -so its not about bragging, we're all annoymous in here, I am reporting things as I view them. You'll note I didn't post for a number of months, because I was dealing with multiple women responding in similar fashion with the same basic outcome and I waited to I had something worthwhile to contribute, but in this case with Female B I've got a Timeframe X and a Timeframe Y comparison and I'm reporting it exactly as it occured. With this particular woman, I've gone from "nice guy" to something else (provable by her actions not just words) and the major variable was the perceived (apart from the married issue) monogamy issue, because I have never and still don't treat her like shit. With other women, its been "gentlemen horndog" from Day 1 so I don't have a comparison per se, but both the intensity of their responses and the quality of the individual women -tells me something else is at work and I believe this tinge of non-monogamy is the critical factor. Try to retain the interest of 9 and 10 level women w/o putting out a horndog vibe thing -and see what happens. You do make a good point on another issue (something that occured to me but I left out) on the normal rule as once tagged a nice guy its usually very hard to undo, if not impossible, however note when i first met her she did tag me a nice guy, but a married nice guy, which arguably is not really a pure nice guy as the term would be defined Note even the other (usual bullshit) article from the relationship "expert" on Yahoo that I just posted in the other thread - concedes that the nice guy issue is real. Seed spreading is an entirely logical explanation because its the essence of Alpha behavior in evolutionary terms. Yes, I may have a biased outlook but the theory holds together in all kinds of configurations, and once again (no one will answer) why are women being excepted from normal primordial influences whereas its widely acknowledged that males are impacted? Everyone talks about nice guys vs bad guys but no one defines what they are, except the irrelevant side issue (e.g the yahoo article) about nice guys as wussy marshmellow ass-kisser pushover doormat types who worship women. Are we really supposed to be surprised that women are turned off by guys like that? OF COURSE THEY ARE TURNED OFF, however that is not what the nice guy debate is about and any rational person knows this. Aside from the absurd wuss/marshmellow side issue, nice guys IMHO can generally be defined as sincere, non-deceptive, respectful to women, monogamous, non-controlling males vs jerks - who per women's own descriptions would be disrespectful, self-absorbed, insincere, deceptive, controlling cheaters sometimes with the propensity to be violent. So if one doesn't buy that there is a real nice guy vs jerk/bad guy issue, all of this is irrelevant, however if they do - then they have to develop their own explanations better than what I've put forth. Keep in mind so far no one has resolved this issue, and non-monogamy as a critical offers a cohesive explanation to answer the ultimate question presented

Note in the specific case of "Female B" I tried (to the extent any married guy can) the standard nice guy approach with her a year ago for several months last summer, and after a few months away from her (about 6 months ago) I was already into the gentlemen horndog concept with other women, and her response to me (at that time and since) became like the difference between night and day - its almost as if she's a different woman.

The social scientists would accurately put this issue under the (fairly well studied) heading of hedonic adaption - which is the concept that humans will eventually (no matter how much they are given or posses in material terms) will basically adapt and grow bored with nearly everything. Most people presume beautiful women have it made, however they do have problems, usually just at a higher level. Yes, they get boyfriends fast, but the kind of men they attract (the THEY are attracted to) often tend to be the exact kind that will bore quickly with women. There are ways (through forms of mental imaging etc) to counteract the effects of hedonic adapation, and the the more intelligent beautiful women will can learn to use these methods, however in the case of strippers since they (on average) tend to on the lower end of the intelligence scale - its far less likely they can actually benefit from any of this.