Have you ever had this happen to you???

26 comments

• SuperDude

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  15 years ago

  They guy she promised to "get back to" is pissed at you for taking up the time he wanted with your FAV. That's the way it works. Some dancers will talk to regulars and keep the business rather than risk one dance with a stranger--leaving the regular to be plucked by another dancer.
• giveitayank

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  15 years ago

  SuperDude, If you read it again you'll see it was the other way around. I had never seen her before and asked her for dances. She came off the stage and went over to chat with her "reg" customer. Thirty minutes later I left with a set of blue balls.
• DandyDan

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  15 years ago

  giveitayank- As for part 1, that happened to me once with this one girl who was on her way to being a favorite. I'm told she was a real headcase (probably some sort of drug addiction, now that I think of it), which is too bad, because she could DANCE like no one's business. It's a good thing, perhaps, that she has moved to a different club. As for part 2, I remember that happening with one of my old ATF's. She'd do 2 for 1's just for me. There was also the time when she had already got dressed to leave, and then she saw me come in and then she got dressed to dance and then did a few dances for me. I don't recall a girl ever doing that for me ever, other than that one time.
• ozymandias

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  15 years ago

  It happens all the time. But then, I've been known to be slow about returning calls or emails, and I just classify that in the same category, so it's not especially bothersome. I'll just go have a waitress go and fetch her for me, or select another dancer. O.
• zorro

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  15 years ago

  Sure, have had this happen several times. Pisses me off for about 30 seconds, then I find another girl. I never take it personally, but maybe I'm in denial. Zorro
• how

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  15 years ago

  As ozymandias/Rameses/Veidt (which is it?) noted, this kind of thing happens all the time. Two factors: 1. Many dancers lie as easily as breathing. Try not to take it personally. 2. Most dancers have absolutely no concept of time. (But they can sure count songs!)
• wallanon

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  15 years ago

  Could be the other guy just got there first. Or not.
• Clubber

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  15 years ago

  Something no one else mentioned. Maybe she just said that instead of, "No way! I think I'd rather have sharp sticks poked in my eyes then dance for the likes of you!"
• MisterGuy

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  15 years ago

  "Could be the other guy just got there first. Or not." Exactly, while none of this has ever happened to me, she was likely just opting to just a sit with a regular customer of hers or another guy that had asked for some time with her earlier. This is, of course, assuming that she didn't think that you were a complete troll...you're not a troll are you yank? ;)
• arbeeguy

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  15 years ago

  Well I have a slight variation for this thread. Amber is a very cute and personable dancer at I club I occasionally visit. One night I bought a dance from her and really liked it. (But maybe SHE did not like ME - Maybe I said something stupid, or forgot to tip her - I dunno - she gave no indication at the time. ) But, the next time she saw me (at least two weeks later), we were both all smiles - she asked me if I would buy her a drink - I said sure, and ordered the drink. As soon as it arrived, she picked it up, walked over to a table, and sat down with some other guy. Not a word spoken to me. At least she has an excellent memory, because in subsequent visits to this club I have seen her at least three times and she never makes eye contact. AND I HAVE NO CLUE WHY SHE ASKED ME TO BUY HER A DRINK AND THEN WALKED AWAY WITH IT, NOT A WORD SPOKEN.
• giveitayank

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  15 years ago

  I think what I failed to point out was this--> Dancer number one could have just said, "I can't come over right away after my stage show. I promised another customer some chit chat time." I would have been just fine with that. It's been mentioned time and time again on this board that most dancers don't have very good ethics, specifically in the area of truthfulness. So, I realize that. But, it's just always perplexed me because if they were simply honest with patrons, fellow dancers, management etc. it would be to thier benefit. The reason I say that is because it would NOT have turned me off to buying dances from her on future visits. Yank
• giveitayank

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  15 years ago

  If I remember it correctly, she said she'd come over to me AFTER SHE GOT OFF STAGE. And, "AFTER SHE GOT OFF STAGE." could have meant three hours later, or days later or a week and so on... So, I guess that's, technically, NOT lying. Yank
• lopaw

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  15 years ago

  Yes, this does happen ALOT. You should never take it personally. It's like spotting an item you want in a store, but someone else gets to it and buys it before you. You can either leave the store, shop for a different item, or go chase down the guy who grabbed your item and beat the shit outta him (this last choice is probably not the best idea). It helps to view dancers (or at least their services) as commodities, like an item in a store. If your first choice is "out of stock", just make another selection.
• mmdv26

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  15 years ago

  Happens all the time. Don't worry about it. Could be Stripper Advanced Attention Deficit Disorder (SAADD). Few years back, I asked a fairly new girl for dance after stage. Ten minutes later she came out looked right at me, so I thought she was on her way over. But she turned and sat down with another guy across the room, they shook hands like she was introducing herself so my guess is she didn't know him. Well, I'm a little steamed about it, and suddenly here is sometimes favorite Beth sitting down next to me. Beth asks how I've been, and I start into this crap about the new girl. Beth says 'yeah, I know.' New girl had asked Beth in the dressing room if the guy at the end of the stage with the red shirt on was a good tipper because she was going to do some dances with him. Beth looked out and saw it was me, and told the newby:'all he wants to do is pull it out and rub it on your leg while he licks your neck.' Then Beth says to me: 'I just wanted you to myself tonight!' We went to lap dance area, she pulled it out and rubbed it on a lot of things. I licked her neck and we were both happy. Forgot all about the new dancer.
• casualguy

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  15 years ago

  If it makes you feel better, I've agreed to get dances from dancers before but they said they would be right back. On a few occasions I saw them coming back like after only 1 or two minutes but I was already walking away with another dancer to get dances from someone else. I don't usually do that. I almost always give the dancer at least a few minutes especially if she asked me to wait or she is dancing on stage. Dancers tend to go where their big money spenders are. Regulars may not spend much per dance but over time they become big money spenders. I remember a situation a long time ago where a dancer ignored me. However I learned to ignore such a dancer right back or act like we never talked in the first place. I'll get dancers from other dancers if I feel a need or if she comes back around and I'm still interested I may still get a dance. However if I want to leave and she didn't ask me to stay, she'll just miss out.
• casualguy

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  15 years ago

  meant to say I'll get dances from other dancers if I feel a need for such.
• DickJohnson

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  15 years ago

  Don't ever think you will get a standard business transaction from a dancer. They operate in a different universe. Some get a real kick out of manipulating guys and some are just downright flaky. Some are just plain ignorant or think they're special. Some know how to treat customers right. I do remember once i asked a dancer for a lapper and she actually told me, sure, after she is done with her regular. She even gave me a time frame, which i thought was real cool.
• 3LeggedMan

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  15 years ago

  Just 2 weeks ago I told my current fave while she was on stage that I wanted a Champagne Room dance. She did inform me that another guy had asked her first so I'd have to wait. The waiting was a pain but when she did come to me she made it right with a handful of free admission cards. I was thinking of other ways for her to make it up to me, but at least she didn't forget me altogether.
• how

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  15 years ago

  There's a new bit of lingo (not that new...) among women: "Right now." When they use it in the context of "I'll [do something] right now," it actually translates "...whenever I feel like it." Best just consider strippers' statements as nonsensical rantings. Put no credence in their statements.
• PinkyLynn

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  15 years ago

  I have to agree with Yank. I've been in situations when a customer asks me to come sit with them or have a drink with them after I promise to spend time with somebody else. Of course I want to make money. I do weigh my options before I decide who I go spend time with first. No matter what, I do inform the customer waiting for my time what is going on. "I'm sorry I promise to sit with you after I was done on stage, but the gentleman at the end of the bar a bought me a drink. I'll spend some time with him. I'll try to make my way here to you." Usually I do make it back to the customer who I left waiting. What really pisses me off is when a dancer will make a customer wait for dances. I also waitress at the club I dance at. It's part of my job to tell the dancers when and with who they have dances with. There are a few girls who find it more important to smoke a cigarette, sit down, talk to a regular, than to do a dance which was already paid for. Next thing I know, the bar staff has a very unhappy customer because of this and end up giving his money back or he switches to another girl. Our club is small and the stage rotation during a busy night only allows the dancer to sit for 3-6 songs. I understand the need for a break, but some dancers don't seem to understand that if they don't do their private dances they lose that money. Anyway, from a dancer's point of view and being in the situation myself, I agree with Yank.
• Golfer3166

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  15 years ago

  Happens a lot. Mostly in the clubs that have a good number of 'regulars' in it. The 3 clubs in Lawrence, KS are great examples of this. You see a dancer on stage and tip her and say you want a dance, she smiles and says she will be right over and then heads straight to her regulars. I realize that these guys come in a lot but I watched on one ocassion where the dancer whom I had asked sat at the same table with the same guy until her turn on the stage an hour later. I would think that they would like to get some of the out of town money as well. I would rather the dancer say I can't I'm entertaining one of my regulars so you can move on to someone else.
• MisterGuy

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  15 years ago

  "AND I HAVE NO CLUE WHY SHE ASKED ME TO BUY HER A DRINK AND THEN WALKED AWAY WITH IT, NOT A WORD SPOKEN" She was dissing you...big time...who knows why...that is a cold trick though...
• CowboyesFan

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  15 years ago

  They operate in a different universe. Some get a real kick out of manipulating guys and some are just downright flaky. I think you are correct about this. I have had it happen to me before and I have always thought it was some sort of way of trying to manipulating me or just some sort of head game.
• gridget

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  15 years ago

  I have to say as a dancer that yes some girls are manipulative for sure. I also know that there are some of us who do not lie to customers or treat customers bad rather you spend 2oo dollars or rather you buy a 2 for 1. I try to treat all of my customers with respect because I understand that not everyone who comes into a club can afford to spend alot of money. I think that the girls who lie as in your case ruin themselves, what they don't realize is people remember them and they don't talk to them again usually. i am sorry that you had a bad experience but keep looking and you will find the one who will treat you like you are someone and not just a dollar sign.
• melzor

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  15 years ago

  I think that kind of thing does happen alot. Was at a club on the north end of Phoenix, killing time and waiting for a buddy to get off work. Girl does the stroll by, asks if I want a dance. She wasn't really my type, so I say I'm not quite ready for one yet. She sat down at the table in front of me, so as not to keep other girls from approaching, but did chat with me. Her turn on the pole comes up, she is getting a lot of tips from a couple of guys at the stage. She comes off the stage and walks over to me, still naked, and tells me that those guys really wanted some dances, but she doesn't want to do any for them. She asks if I would please get one from her so she doesn't have to give them any. I give in and get a couple $10 dances, then she comes back to my table and ignores the guys. I probably should have asked her more about it, but I didn't think much of it at the time.
• Anna

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  15 years ago

  Sorry to post so late on this... 1) She says that to everyone almost instinctively and never follows through... 2) She was going to come back but saw someone she knew for a fact would spend (a regular, guaranteed money) In either case, que sera sera...we can't go getting offended each time you tell us you "aren't the dance type of guy, just got here, is broke, or waiting for someone"...lol.