Dude, I got kicked out of my favorite stripclub tonight...

avatar for someyoungguysomeyoungguy
someyoungguysomeyoungguy
Minnesota
Forgive me if none of this makes sense. I'm in the shock part of the process. I think I'll be staying up in bed pissed off over the whole thing and be crying by the time I wake up.

I shouldn't be giving details, but if the feelings remain as hard as they seemed when I got "escorted" out, it doesn't matter if I burn my bridges. So bottom line: I got kicked out of the King of Diamonds tonight, for a combination of misheard words and attitude.

It was the last hour of the night, and my ATF, who said she was going to get back to me as soon as she takes care of this customer, disappeared for about 45 minutes. I'm getting a little restless. This cunt of a waitress said, "What'll you have?" even though I wasn't done with my first glass of beer. But this blonde comes around again, takes my glass (even though I wasn't done with it) and says again, "What'll you have?"

At this point, I kind of went off, I admit. Have you ever been at a stripclub where the waitresses really pester you for drinks, and you say no and no and no until you finally go off and say, "Fine, fine, I'll have a Pepsi!" I said exactly that. Except instead of saying "fine," I said "fuck." This bitch goes, the bouncer comes and says let's go. Swearing at the waitress, he said. I left without resisting. I could've said I swore but I didn't swear at her, but it's no use.

I'm getting angrier and angrier just thinking about it, and I know if I kept my mouth shut I could've avoided it. This waitress obviously either was having a bad night or wanted to pick a fight with someone. (Shit, a lot of the strippers were copping attitude, too; I don't remember seeing so many girls leave my tip at the rail.) Too bad Fatboy was doing his job and "standing up" for his co-worker, even if she misheard or lied.

What I'm particularly worried about is my ATF. I have no way to contact her and to tell her what exactly happened and that this was all a big misunderstanding. What if she came out of the VIP right after I left? What would the bouncer say? Even worse, what would that idiot waitress say? Would she get angry at them for the money she lost? Or ... would she believe them?

And now I have to worry about ever coming back. I never even got to see her tonight because she was tied up, I guess. Should I even try to go back? Should I give it some time? Will I be allowed back? And what happens if I run into that waitress and that bouncer, both of whom I want to spit in their faces?

I'm panicky, guys, but I need some guidance as to what the fuck I can do. Also, has anyone here been kicked out of their favorite SC? What did you do? Please help.

25 comments

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avatar for jablake
jablake
16 years ago
I don't see any harm in trying to go back unless you made a super scene and if that is the case give it a few weeks.
avatar for DandyDan
DandyDan
16 years ago
Jablake's right, go back in a few weeks and its probably forgotten. Who knows, they could have an all new crew there.

As for myself, I wasn't kicked out, but I was in a group where one of the other guys was kicked out, so I guess I was kicked out by proxy. He (the one kicked out) could get highly annoying when drunk. Naturally, he got fired from his job (my present employer) for showing up drunk.
avatar for jablake
jablake
16 years ago
Over at The Trap a couple of years ago one of the customers got drunk and really made a huge scene. The two security guys had to finally take him out yelling and screaming.

The manager's reaction was pretty much oh well, I hope he isn't having real problems at work or home. I said to the manager after that scene you're worried about his job or home life? He said, well people do go off the deep end or need to let off steam.

I did have a problem over at RolLexx with an obnoxious DJ and bartender and was threatened with removal from the club. I definitely didn't want any trouble---I'm old and sickly---so I let things calm down. On my return everyone was in a good mood----no problems at all. I always try and remember to "turn the other cheek" (actually more like try and keep a low profile) because the person could be having a bad day or whatever. It isn't about right or wrong in the least . . . it is about not making a bad situation worse.

I doubt in a few weeks anyone will remember too much or care too much.
avatar for SuperDude
SuperDude
16 years ago
Let it cool down and go back. If you wanted to be sure that they will love you, send the waitress flowers and a note of apology. Yes, it's over the top, wussy, and not necessary because they really don't care about you once they escorted you out. But think about how you will be treated by that waitress, the manager and the dancers if you send flowers. They will fawn all over you.
avatar for BobbyI
BobbyI
16 years ago
Agree with the others. It will blow over.

Always get the numbers of strippers you would like to fuck early on just in case of things like this. Most will give out their numbers the first time you meet them.
avatar for Jpac73
Jpac73
16 years ago
When she picked up your glass of beer and asked "what will you have?" You should have said "I was having that beer until you picked it up." I would have gotten up and found a member of management then and told he or she the story. If they acted like they wanted to take her side then I would have just left, and told them they don't know how to treat customers. Aggressive saling tactics will not make for repeat customers.
avatar for flguytampa21
flguytampa21
16 years ago
Personally, if I am having a night like that, I would leave and go to another club, But I don't your area. I would also try going again early on your ATF;s shift or an off night, when she won't be as busy.
avatar for Clubber
Clubber
16 years ago
someyoungguysomeyoungguy,

I don't know your situation with the club and staff BEFORE the incident, but a similar thing happened to me. I never returned. Then one day, out of the blue, my favorite bartender there called me and said she had heard what happened, but not until the offending "management" had moved on. She asked that I return, and I did. She even gave me "credit" for the money that they had ripped off me.
avatar for Book Guy
Book Guy
16 years ago
So, you "went off" on a waitress in the last hour of the night, while drinking alcohol? Clubs routinely dispense with potential-problem situations like that, by just asking someone to leave. I've been asked to leave a club which I had established, really firmly, I attended "regularly," about five times in the last fifteen years or so.

I was asked to leave Fantasia in Richmond Hill at least once due to over-grabby behavior with one girl or another. (Idiotic: the club was effectively a brothel, so the idea of fondling a girl's tits in a lap-dance would be BELOW the norm for levels of contact.) Also at least once due to being too drunk to stand up. I was asked to leave the Brass Rail in Toronto for approaching a dancer for a private dance, with, "Why don't we spend some time together?" Evidently she took that as a solicitation for outside-the-club activity, but I had only meant to solicit a regular lapper. I was asked to leave Private Eyes in Toronto for failing to tip the bartender above and beyond the $10 I paid for an $8.50 rum-and-coke. I was asked to leave Flashdancer in NYC for refusing to have a massage from the roving back-rub girl because I had thought she was offering them for free, but then said "no, thanks" when she surprised me with the price before starting and so I changed my mind. I was asked to leave Babe's in Jackson, MS, at least twice, one or more times for the waitress thinking I was cursing her out when I was thanking her (she had a hate-on for anyone who wasn't old and fat). I was asked to leave Visions in New Orleans when a dancer kicked my drink off the bar into my lap. I was asked to leave Mons Venus in Tampa when I was getting serial lappers by just sitting on the couch and reaching out to ask whoever the next girl who walked by was, would she dance for me. I was asked to leave 2001 Odyssey in Tampa for spending too long in the private rooms with one dancer, even though I had paid for all the time. I was asked to leave Ybor Strip in Tampa for being so drunk I couldn't remember where my wallet was. I was asked to leave Michael's in Houston for getting a blowjob -- and yes, I had paid a reasonable price for it! I was asked to leave ... golly, the list goes on!

Am I a problem customer? Probably. But I always behave respectfully (as best I can), and simply say, "Oh, I'm sorry. I'll leave. I'm sorry for the trouble." I keep saying that sort of thing, and walking slowly with the bouncer, and not resisting, and not making a fuss. Then a week later I call and double-check what it is that I need to do to re-gain entry. "Can I come back some time? A month from now?" I always offer to wait a month, and I always explain that I felt there had been nothing that *I* had done which was wrong. I don't TELL my side of the story, I just say that there IS my side of the story.

Nearly every club has been quite polite and positive about letting me come back. The high-volume places have said that I'd have to talk to a manager, and I've always tried to do that, but whenever I returned, whether it be to Mons or Pink Pony or Ybor or 2001 or Treasures or or Platinum Plus or Visions, the managers have been different people and I haven't been able to even find anyone who remembered the incident. And anyway, I was standing there with a fist-full of dollars, a sober demeanor, a nice suit-jacket, and a lusty desperate look in my eye, so they knew a good customer when they saw one, and they let me back in.

The two clubs that have told me not to come back, have been hole-in-the-wall dumps. And I've been able to re-attend anyway. For one, at Babe's in Jackson continually got the story wrong, and eventually fired that problematic waitress, and when word got out that she was gone, their customer base quadrupled overnight. For the other, at a dive-bar in the French Quarter, ownership kept changing and the girls were all just some kind of mafia whores anyway, so I didn't really care about getting in to that one joint ever again.

See, it's all part of the game. You go, you get booted, you find somewhere else, later you go back. As long as you haven't gotten the shit kicked out of you, it's a fun evening.
avatar for Officer
Officer
16 years ago
wow, bookguy, you've been kicked out of clubs a lot---I've never been kicked out!
avatar for Shanell
Shanell
16 years ago
I think you should try to go back in a few months.
avatar for imnumnutz
imnumnutz
16 years ago
if it's the first time you've been kicked out, and you're telling us EVERYTHING that happened TRUTHFULLY, I'd feel safe in going back in a couple of weeks, particularly if you've been a good customer in the past.
avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
16 years ago
I have never been kicked out of a strip club but my son has. He was in Ca on business and got kicked out of Mr. J's in Santa Ana. During his taxi ride to his hotel, he called me on his cell phone, to tell me what a rude bunch of ass holes the were and suggested that I go on TUSCL and write a very bad review. I explained that I would not come on her and write a review for a club that I has never been in.

Two days later, when he was back in Atlanta, He called and admitted that he was the problem. "Drunk and obnoxious" He even fell asleep at his hotel bar and got kicked out of there too. One favorite dancer told me last week that you really have to be bad to get kicked out of a strip club. I rarely see it.
avatar for snowtime
snowtime
16 years ago
I have never been kicked out of a club, but I suspect you can return without any questions asked. I doubt it is anything any of them will remember or care about. If it really bothers you contact the manager and let him hear your side. I'm sure they want your business and will welcome you back. They are not going to permanently bar a customer for swearing at a waitress or dancer. In a place that serves alcohol this is probably a daily occurrance.
avatar for someyoungguysomeyoungguy
You guys think it'll blow over? OK. I'll give it, say, half a year.

To be honest, I'm still angry. So much so that a part of me is willing to pick a fight if I saw either that waitress or that bouncer at the KoD the next time I go. I boil over in anger with the thought that they'd try to throw me out of the club a second time. In fact, why should I ever go to the KoD ever again? Those two pathetic fucks tossed me out for no good goddamn reason. Not only did they deprive me of my ATF, but they've permanently altered my relationship with the club. What use is it to come back now?

Or am I just protesting too much?

Regardless, from the bottom of my heart, thank you guys so much for your advice. There is no one in my life I can share my hobby with, so I turn to you guys at TUSCl for help, and help you have. I don't know what'd I do without you guys.
avatar for trickystick
trickystick
16 years ago
Definitely go back. Apologize if you have to, but make light of it if you do. It doesn't sound like a big deal.

On the other hand, if you got that bent out of shape over the waitress just doing her job, maybe you shouldn't go back for a while - might be good to have a little break.
avatar for arbeeguy
arbeeguy
16 years ago
Someone said that when one door closes another one opens. I would say another door is there WAITING TO BE opened. So check out another club, or two or three. But do go back to King of Diamonds in two weeks (or sooner) and just see what happens. My guess is that all will be forgiven.

Like you, I got kicked out of a club. And not for dropping the F bomb. I had been pressuring a young cutie to let me play with her pussy in the private dance area. As soon as I got booted, I realized they had the damn place miked. (mic-ed?) Anyway, I was escorted out quickly with the warning "Don't even think about ever coming back." I did not have an ATF waiting for me inside so it was not as painful as for you. But, considering how mild your "offense" was, I can't believe the grudge would last more than two weeks. For that matter, if you went back at your next regular time, with a polite apology ready in case you need it, all might be forgiven at once. In my own case, I think I waited about a month, and the bouncer didn't even work there any more. If I were you I would amuse myself in other ways for two weeks, then walk in to King of Diamonds with head held high, absolutely no attitude, and a friendly smile. KEEP US POSTED ON THIS ONE.
avatar for minnow
minnow
16 years ago
syg(2)- T_B's advice is "spot on". Additionally, I have some other thoughts on how to avoid a recurrence of "kick out"

1) Be proactive: The picture I'm getting from narrative is that you are "stuck" on your ATF (very easy to do), and when ATF became occupied for great lengths, you apparently moped around nursing your beer ( nothing wrong with nursing a drink). A lone wolf in the mope mode practically screams "patsy". (not saying that you are 1, but)... However wrongfully, bullies like to pick on patsies. When a waitress bugs me for drink, I say, "I don't want another drink now, but could you please bring me back 9 ones", while proferring a 10. That tells her that you're not a cheapskate, and that you'll at least be fairly active tipping dancers on stage. I also get the impression that interaction with subject waitress could result in more bad blood. You could flag down another waitress for initial drink & refill. Or if you don't want refill, just flag down other waitress for a Pepsi or cup of coffee.(gotta have that caffeine).

2) Avoid fixations- if not for ejection avoidance, then for your own enjoyment of club visits. In short- keep an open mind, and be willing to go with flow at times. Having ATF involved with other customer within 1 hr of closing is not best recipe for good time with ATF.(were YOUR sessions with ATF only 10 minutes???). Aren't there other potential hotties around? OK, new dancer may not be as good as ATF, but still be good enough for a good time. Sometimes, new dancer can surpass ATF. There was 1 LA area club where I had a customarily good PD with a popular & well reviewed dancer. Afterwards, I met another prospect that I thought I'd try for the hell of it. Well, new dancer raised the good nuances of prior dancer to an entirely new level. (Alas, never saw her again on subsequent visits). An ATF that keeps me waiting is on temporary suspension of ATF status.

3) Consider a Plan B- Like, arriving earlier at less crowded time, or a less crowded night. Or even going to other club- though that's a somewhat tall order, seeing that "KOD" is most highly rated club in area.
Good luck, "luk" how it goes.
avatar for Golfer3166
Golfer3166
16 years ago
This can happen pretty often. I have never been kicked out myself but I have been asked to leave with a group. In my case one of my friends was soliciting a dancer at another table behind us. The bouncer came up to us, after the dancer who had been talked to told him and said you guys have to leave. We had no idea what he was talking about, the guilty party had gone to the bathroom. The bouncer explained it and we told him that it wasn't us and that the dancer in question had actually offered OTC to both of us and was refused. I told him that I thought it was just a misunderstanding and he let us stay but it wasn't much fun after that.
avatar for someyoungguysomeyoungguy
Alright, I'll let it go and give the club some time. This is the first time I've gotten kicked out for something completely unjustified. I just don't want to be disrespected, you know?
avatar for Clubber
Clubber
16 years ago
some you............,

Worst case, you go back with a chip on your shoulder and you end up spending your evening in the county lock up, YOU lose! Best bet, let it go and have fun there or another club!
avatar for desotophil
desotophil
16 years ago
Go back, give the waitress an extra tip and a nice smile if she's your server. Tell her no hard feelings and if you were out of line, apologize. Apologies don't cost a thing, even if you shouldn't have to. The club wants your money and not the bullshit, so if you blow it off and enjoy yourself, you'll be welcome with no penalty time outs, hahaha. Last hour incidents happen in every bar and usually have no lasting affect. But remember, it's not the end of the world, just a bad end to one day.
avatar for someyoungguysomeyoungguy
I'm not making any guarantees. But I'll be DAMNED if I'm going to apologize or even smile if either of those two assholes is there when I go back. Just sayin'.
avatar for samsung1
samsung1
16 years ago
I was never kicked out of a strip club before but I was threaten by the waitress if I did not buy a drink then I would have to leave. I told her I would buy one later, but she just stood there and said "I am going to wait here until you are ready to buy one". She was very bitchy and annoying the rest of the night.

It was at Danny's Gold Fox in Columbus, OH, and it is now "closed for remolding", which is the euphemism for "out of business" for the strip clubs here in Columbus, OH.

I was there on a Saturday night and there were only a few customers. It was a very boring environment and I was not interested in staying very long. It does not surprise me at all that this place is out of business.
avatar for DandyDan
DandyDan
16 years ago
samsung1-
Most of the (bikini) bars around my area (Omaha) are like that, and I imagine they are like that elsewhere. Even at one of my favorite places which serve alcohol, they will ask you to buy something if your drink is empty, in which case its often 7Up. Its not like they care what you're drinking, it is the fact you are drinking something.
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