Okay, we all enjoy the strip club scene, and for the most part keep it a secret from family and loved ones. How would you feel or react if you found out that your wife or SO or even daughter was secretly, and secretly is the key, a stripper?
The job doesn't necessarily have to be bad, and there are some girls who can do it without a big negative impact. The longer it goes on the more likely it will start to show harmful affects, however.
The girls I see who it doesn't seem to harm are the ones who have other things going on in their lives so that stripping is not a major component of their lives. They are also the ones who don't lie or try to rip off people and who treat others (including customers) well. Also not doing extras seems to be very important to preserving self-esteem, although there are some extremely rare ones who can handle that (much, much more unlikely than most junkies would like to think though).
You are right the "secret" part is the key. If she felt she had to keep it secret I think it would be more likely that she was in the vast, vast majority who suffer harmful of effects (mostly due to guilt) because of the job.
To twist your question a bit though, if she did not feel the need to keep it secret, she would be much more likely to be one of the ones who could handle it.
In any case it would boil down to can she handle it without bad consequences for herself. Most cannot. But there are exceptions. I would trust my own judgment to know which she was.
(Have to qualify this by saying I'm not married and have no children (that I know of), so that's how I think I would feel.)
Intellectually good response.How about emotionally. Knowing what goes on in the LD room, even with "good girls", no reaction about other guys handling her? No curiosity about what is 'really' going on?
clubman2: Yes, of course there would be those doubts, unless it was super clear that she fit the profile of a girl who won't. (And as exacting a profile as I think I can make, I am sure there would always be exceptions, then I would have doubts)...
However, I think people always miss the point about why the job is really so bad. I don't think it's the grinding or even extras, but just the way they come to see the world due to the culture. The girls lose work ethics and ambition. They come to rationalize that stealing, lying, and manipulation are ok (and it is funny being on these boards where we see customer play right along with them). The extent to which that was happening to her would me barometer about how much trouble she was in. (Needless to say drug usage, especially heroin, would be a big red flag as well.)
Still, you are right, emotionally it might be harder to handle "possible whorishness" than "ethical degradation". But, hopefully, the rational mind wins out at the end of the day.
I suppose I would be totally shocked. My son and especially my daughter know about my strip clubbing. They do not totally like what I do but accept it. My son and I once closed the Memphis Platinum Plus 3 nights in a row. My daughter is so loving. She worries about me almost too much. She continues to support my addiction by supplying me with Liz Clairborne Perfumes for the girls and constantly reminds me to be careful(condoms). Some of us can have the best of both worlds.
"However, I think people always miss the point about why the job is really so bad."
I don't think people in general give a flying fuck about ethics so there isn't a missed point about why the job is negative. If she became a judge or lawyer, then would anyone care about ethics as long as she was obeying or above the law? Of course, to some if it is legal it is ethical.
If I discovered my wife was secretly moonlighting as a stripper it would be the happiest day of my life.
My daughter? Way too heavy, way too judgmental. (Well my wife is also too judgmental, IMHO. That is why I would be so thrilled if I discovered she was a secret stripper. We could redefine our relationship.)
Well if my daughter chose to do it Id insure she had the best support at home. Its a hard job but with the word whore being thrown in your face at times it can get to you. But why would I alienate my daughter and our relationship based on a decision she made.
Okay, we all recognize the general public doesn't have a high view of stripper and present there own mores and ethics. With the exception being the way you feel about how their reaction to that knowledge would impact you and the SO, how would you personnaly feel. I know I would go bullshit. I would have a problem with other men having that kind of access to my lady. But that's just me. To put some clarity around this, I have had serious relationships with strippers to the point that I was very close to marrying one, but she would have quite the bussiness as that became reality. This question of course is not applicable to those who are dancing with consent.
WG - I have no doubt that you would provide support and understanding to your daughter if that was her choice but would you want or wish for her to take that path? My guess is no.
Would I want total strangers calling her a whore?? No of course not.
I dont blame the job I blame the narrowminded accusers. That insult gets thrown at you even off the job.
If she said its what she wanted I wouldnt have any problem at all. Id warn her that their are assholes everywhere they just seem to congregate at the clubs. What I wish for her is happiness that is all
Shadowcat is too funny! This is from one of his posts earlier in this thread. Don’t know how this one slipped by.
“I suppose I would be totally shocked.†– Preferably with a taser or a cattle prod.
“My son and especially my daughter know about my strip clubbing.†– The family that plays together?
“They do not totally like what I do but accept it.†– Sometimes anal is a pain in the ass.
“My son and I once closed the Memphis Platinum Plus 3 nights in a row.†– He must be a regular chip off the old pathetic looser block.
“My daughter is so loving.†– A true GFE or so I’ve heard.
“She worries about me almost too much.†-- Fears for your sanity does she?
“She continues to support my addiction by supplying me with Liz Clairborne Perfumes for the girls and constantly reminds me to be careful(condoms).†– Maybe she just doesn’t want to be saddled with one of those SC goober babies.
“Some of us can have the best of both worlds.†– Yeah I’ll buy you a t-shirt that says “Incest Is Best!†on it.
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The girls I see who it doesn't seem to harm are the ones who have other things going on in their lives so that stripping is not a major component of their lives. They are also the ones who don't lie or try to rip off people and who treat others (including customers) well. Also not doing extras seems to be very important to preserving self-esteem, although there are some extremely rare ones who can handle that (much, much more unlikely than most junkies would like to think though).
You are right the "secret" part is the key. If she felt she had to keep it secret I think it would be more likely that she was in the vast, vast majority who suffer harmful of effects (mostly due to guilt) because of the job.
To twist your question a bit though, if she did not feel the need to keep it secret, she would be much more likely to be one of the ones who could handle it.
In any case it would boil down to can she handle it without bad consequences for herself. Most cannot. But there are exceptions. I would trust my own judgment to know which she was.
(Have to qualify this by saying I'm not married and have no children (that I know of), so that's how I think I would feel.)
However, I think people always miss the point about why the job is really so bad. I don't think it's the grinding or even extras, but just the way they come to see the world due to the culture. The girls lose work ethics and ambition. They come to rationalize that stealing, lying, and manipulation are ok (and it is funny being on these boards where we see customer play right along with them). The extent to which that was happening to her would me barometer about how much trouble she was in. (Needless to say drug usage, especially heroin, would be a big red flag as well.)
Still, you are right, emotionally it might be harder to handle "possible whorishness" than "ethical degradation". But, hopefully, the rational mind wins out at the end of the day.
I don't think people in general give a flying fuck about ethics so there isn't a missed point about why the job is negative. If she became a judge or lawyer, then would anyone care about ethics as long as she was obeying or above the law? Of course, to some if it is legal it is ethical.
My daughter? Way too heavy, way too judgmental. (Well my wife is also too judgmental, IMHO. That is why I would be so thrilled if I discovered she was a secret stripper. We could redefine our relationship.)
NO SUCH THING as way too heavy in the black clubs that I visit. Depending on the customers at any given time the more weight, the more money.
WG - I have no doubt that you would provide support and understanding to your daughter if that was her choice but would you want or wish for her to take that path? My guess is no.
I dont blame the job I blame the narrowminded accusers. That insult gets thrown at you even off the job.
If she said its what she wanted I wouldnt have any problem at all. Id warn her that their are assholes everywhere they just seem to congregate at the clubs. What I wish for her is happiness that is all
“I suppose I would be totally shocked.†– Preferably with a taser or a cattle prod.
“My son and especially my daughter know about my strip clubbing.†– The family that plays together?
“They do not totally like what I do but accept it.†– Sometimes anal is a pain in the ass.
“My son and I once closed the Memphis Platinum Plus 3 nights in a row.†– He must be a regular chip off the old pathetic looser block.
“My daughter is so loving.†– A true GFE or so I’ve heard.
“She worries about me almost too much.†-- Fears for your sanity does she?
“She continues to support my addiction by supplying me with Liz Clairborne Perfumes for the girls and constantly reminds me to be careful(condoms).†– Maybe she just doesn’t want to be saddled with one of those SC goober babies.
“Some of us can have the best of both worlds.†– Yeah I’ll buy you a t-shirt that says “Incest Is Best!†on it.