Lunch at Trump’s

I have a wealthy friend who is a big MAGA and member of the Mar a Lago club who invited me and my wife to a holiday lunch at Trump’s place. Regardless of your political affiliation or feelings for the Commander In Chief elect, I have to say it’s cool as fuck to go to lunch at the Florida White House. I would have liked to have written this as a review, but unfortunately there is no TUSCL listing for this club.

Mar a Lago is on the island of Palm Beach, about 60 miles north of Miami. It is just north of the traffic circle at the intersection of A1A and Southern Blvd. The main buildings are visible from A1A, and one can see into the west lawns of the property and the intracoastal waterfront when approaching from the Southern Blvd bridge. Upon arrival the first thing that strikes you is lack of visible security. There was a Palm Beach County Sheriff’s Deputy in his car at the entry driveway, but I believe he was there primarily to keep traffic and sightseers moving along on A1A. However, like a Vegas casino, you know that heavy security is there, even if you don’t see it.

We drove right in through the A1A entry driveway, on the north side of the property and I provided my drivers license to the security guard at the gate. He checked to see that we were on the guest list (not unlike getting into a typical gated community). There was no pat down, or weapons check, and they never asked for my wife’s ID. We left the car in the gate area, where it was taken by a valet (and likely thoroughly searched - or maybe not?) We walked in through an entry foyer into a club room where we met my friend and his wife. We ordered drinks, but were seated outside in the restaurant courtyard area before the drinks could arrive. It was a cool, sunny, beautiful South Florida December afternoon, and the weather couldn’t have been nicer.

The attractive and attentive waitstaff all appeared to be young European women and men, likely working under H1B. I ordered the crab cakes, and my wife ordered a large salad. The food was exceptional. The menu was somewhat limited, but this is a private club and not a full service restaurant. Prices were not listed in the menu which is not uncommon for a private club, as I am pretty sure we were there to help satisfy my friend’s annual food & beverage minimum before the end of the year.

My friend walked around and said hello to a few of the other diners. There were a couple of people whose names I recognized as being local movers and shakers, but no celebrity sightings. We were told that Donald was on the property while we were there, and that he likes to get out and greet people, but we never caught a
glimpse of 45-47.

After lunch and a couple of cocktails, we walked around the property, and we looked into the lavish main ballroom that was being set up for a wedding later that night. I was sure to use the unattended bathroom, with gold fixtures, where I swiped a few gold-embossed paper hand towels with the Trump Mar a Lago emblem. Again, it felt odd that we were able to walk around pretty much anywhere we wanted, and take pictures and selfies without encountering any visible security.

We walked through the tunnel that goes beneath A1A, over to the beach club and pool that is, well, on the beach. Unfortunately, there were no bikini-clad sunbathers, in fact I don’t recall seeing anyone in swimwear. But despite being a bright, sunny afternoon, it was in the low 70’s which is a little too cool for most locals.

We walked back through the tunnel to the main facility, where we found ourselves in an old-Florida style oak paneled club room. Literally, Trump’s man cave, adorned with a larger than life-sized portrait of himself. The kind of place where you order an old fashioned, or some other good whiskey or bourbon drink, then walk outside and squint from the sunlight. We got caught up on the college football games that were playing on the TV, and then called it a day.

In all it was a really enjoyable afternoon at Mar a Lago. I highly recommend it for anyone fortunate enough to be invited, or wealthy enough to pony up the $200K + buy-in and the $20K annual dues (plus F&B minimums and yes, golf is extra). The facility is older, and would be considered lavish for its age, but not overly opulent. It’s just a great place to hang out, regardless of your political leanings. If this sounds like a brag, it is. I’ll admit to that since despite the fact that I don’t consider myself to be a MAGA, I still think its cool as fuck to have had lunch at Trump’s place.

PS There are hotel suites on the property if you really want to impress your OTC girls.