Help me figure out this interaction.
I’m not new to clubs but new to VIP rooms and OTC. So there’s this girl I connected with pretty well. Did OTC and then last week got a VIP room with her. (Which wasn’t without drama either) She seemed great. So this week I go in to meet her. I’m not able to do rooms every week. I just can’t afford it that often. So she comes out of a vip room with another customer and sits down with me. She offers to have a friend of hers join us in VIP. I tell her, well I can’t do a room this week but I’d love to buy some dances and drinks.
Suddenly she gets upset, throws her phone in her purse and says “We’re not doing that any more” and storms off. I don’t take things like this personally but there’s no reason to act like that. Had she said something like “ I appreciate that, but I have another regular who wanted to spend more time with me in the VIP room” then I’d be perfectly fine with that.
My guess is once she knew I’m willing to do vip or otc she expects it every time we see each other. Had she not stormed off I still would’ve dropped a couple hundred bucks on her and she would’ve had plenty of time to go see her other client in VIP.
Suddenly she gets upset, throws her phone in her purse and says “We’re not doing that any more” and storms off. I don’t take things like this personally but there’s no reason to act like that. Had she said something like “ I appreciate that, but I have another regular who wanted to spend more time with me in the VIP room” then I’d be perfectly fine with that.
My guess is once she knew I’m willing to do vip or otc she expects it every time we see each other. Had she not stormed off I still would’ve dropped a couple hundred bucks on her and she would’ve had plenty of time to go see her other client in VIP.
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And yeah in some cases dancers assume you have a certain amount of spending money and that you need to spend it all on them. I thought she just finished a VIP with a customer, did she ever mention that she’s doing VIP with a customer again?
She had them thinking if they didn’t drop significant money on her every time they came into the club she would no longer talk to them. She was extremely charming so she was effective in her game.
Most of her targets were weak men with mediocre jobs who had never been married. She also could have done extras in this club with these guys but never would because A. she didn’t have to and they’d still do VIPs with her and B. she thought she would lose her negotiating power once she did extras with these PL customers.
I know she was doing OTC with some customers so her game would only work on naive, weak men.
most girls in this industry are not going to say anything as tactful as that.
on your next club visit just see how it plays out if she's there. my move would be to spot her. then walk towards that area without looking at her. just walk in a sorta spaced out kinda way until you find a spot where she sees you. just don't look at her and just look towards the stage or tv. then wait and see if she approaches you,
if she heads toward you do not bring up that bad encounter. if she brings it up just find a way to divert and ask want to start all over? if she doesn't head your way then just move on to another girl.
In my experience, most of the time the girl will come right back over the next time she see's me, sometimes later that same visit and almost always its as if nothing happened. It's up to you if you want to deal with the drama and instability. I didn't see the interaction, so I don't know how bad it was. But I'm generally leery of girls who make a scene or anger quickly over small things and am quick to cut them off. That's partially because I'm mostly seeing girls ITC to eventually to get them OTC, and I do OTC at my home. So, I cut bait at the first sign of instability. Your situation may be different.
Wasnt she already done with the VIP since she was offering to do a VIP with you?
Wasnt she already done with the VIP since she was offering to do a VIP with you?
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Well, apparently she was in VIP with someone else. I knew she was meeting another customer but had no idea for how long or if they were doing VIP. I forget exactly what she said, but as soon as I told her, I wasn’t doing VIP she walked back in the direction of the VIP rooms.
This seems to be the best interpretation. I’ll be back at the club soon. Other than that I’m not texting her or acknowledging anything unless she wants to come to me and ask.
Keep in mind the last time I did vip with her it was after I did vip with two other girls on a day she told me she wasn’t going to be there. Somehow she took offense to it.
Money is the most common motivation for strippers. But, to one degree or another, many strippers are also motivated by power tripping, and/or getting revenge on you for bad acts of others.
When somebody shits on you or gives you the brush off, and you don't already know why, you probably never will. You can ask them why, but it's a long shot you'll get an honest answer. Try not to dwell on it.
Her game is meant to condition you into giving her more so you dont want her acting like this.
Why did you give her more for last weeks vip. Also isnt a lot of this extra vip money going to the club anyway. Some clubs even keep half of the dancers vip/dance earnings. Its a waste of money seeing an otc dancer in the club, when you could use it to see a different dancer itc whom you haven’t seen OTC yet. If you only want to see one dancer, even if other hot dancers are available, thats an issue in itself, and the question becomes why you only want to see the one dancer
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Time for the next girl.
You dodged a bullet with her, as each time you would do a session with her, she would get more and more possessive and entitled.
I've also experienced the "but you gave me $x last time, so I expect at least that much this time" mindset. It sucks the fun out the hobby, so I generally avoid such girls from that point, unless there is some value to me of continuing to associate with her (and in the absence of drama).
I'm pretty new to VIP and OTC and I probably got suckered by thinking with the wrong head. I paid for the room already with a previous girl and had two hours with her. I still had the room all night so I invited the girl in question up into the room. I paid her the agreed upon fee, that went to her. She then asked for a bit more to make up for a room she supposedly turned down with another customer. I agreed, probably because of the game she played with me earlier that evening with another girl, and like I said, looking back on it, I got suckered.
She got jealous that I was in a room with someone else anyway. I chalked it up to a misunderstanding. But this latest episode that I'm posting about really bothered me.
Jealousy is a mental disorder and the best way to fix it is continue doing things that make her jealous. Keep going to the same club, stop seeing her entirely and see other girls instead.
Also @funontheside i disagree regarding PL and stripper not owing each other anything. Both owe each other common courtesy; what that entails will differ depending on each scenario. It can include things like being discreet, not starting drama, not being jealous or possessive.
Your best bet would have just been to say you wanted to but couldn't afford it and either let her shrug and walk away or be the one to suggest regular dances.
If a girl gets jealous, or worse, dictates that you can't dance with other girls, send her away permanently.
OTC always complicates things ITC. When you told her that you were broke, you not only shattered her assumption that she was going to be paid that day, but also informed her that she had done OTC with a guy who couldn't afford to be a reliable regular.
My best guest is that she was disgusted with both herself and with you. I'm also sure that she was wondering the same thing that I am: Why the fuck would you show back up to the club if you couldn't afford to fully participate? How did you not know that converting from reliable regular to club furniture would not occur without some static?
Idk. Maybe I've been doing this for so long that I suffer from some form of Stockholm syndrome, lmao. But IME it's never going to go well when you breach the OTC barrier with a girl and then show up to her club the next time with empty pockets.
Time for the next girl.”
All about the money is kinda the point. It may shatter your illusion of “she likes me” or even “she prefers me over other customers” but if your head can wrap around a simple quod pro quo transaction that’s kinda the goal. Give me someone reliable for service and cost.
There was a previous issue when I did a room with her where she flipped out over text when she saw me doing a room with someone else on a day she claimed she wasn’t going to be at the club. I even went so far as to do another room with her later that night. She then acted like nothing ever happened. But really, she had no business getting upset then either. There’s no exclusivity and as far as I knew she wasn’t even going to be there.
When we did OTC. She initially told me she “could work with” what I offered her, then a few days later got angry when I reminded her what we agreed on claiming it should be more. I gave her the chance to back out but she eventually accepted.
So this isn’t really the first time this sort of behavior has happened. I get what you’re saying, and maybe i didnt understand that agreeing to meet her at the club on that night automatically meant getting VIP (I never mentioned it).
Im also more than happy to save my money and stay home if there is going to be this constant increasing expectation of more money and I can’t just enjoy an evening out without the drama. If a dancer wants to act like that then maybe they don’t need my money that bad anyway.