Ruh Ro, Shaggy…..
Here’s an interesting DM exchange I’m having.A guy writes me and asks about a particular dancer used to see at 2-3 clubs, a CF of mine for a couple years (whenever I could find her). She was LM at first, but eventually she started giving it up ITC right towards the end. Here’s the key exchanges (names redacted).
HIM: Whats her menu and rates
Yeah she wears jewel in forehead ?
Clit piercing ?
You seen her post pandemic?
ME: No, I haven’t seen her anywhere for a couple years, since ____ closed. I never got her #, always guessed she was married. Took me 4-5 VIPs before I got FS, and only at ____ close to end. At _____, it was hand jobs for the first couple, then a BJ once. I always reminded her we’d talked at length before; she remembered & knew I was a good customer. Think I had to pay $200 or 220 tip for FS, higher than I usually pay but I was into her look & style. If you DO find her, let me know. And feel free to steal my “you remember me, I’m ____” line LOL.
HIM: Lol ok
Yeah I’m actually her husband
Just realizing how shitty she is
Thanks though
Could u help me set her up?
Wasted 15 years of my life
You’re not lying to me right?
I want to make sure she’s not doing this shit anymore
It’s infuriating
If I give u my number could we get in touch, I want her to lie to my face
ME: Huh. My ex wife turned out to be a slut who lied to me for 18 years. But ultimately it turned out better for me.
Good luck, man. But I ain’t getting involved in your situation. I’ve seen several married strippers, and never even tried to get my head around how that kind of arrangement works. Probably lucky I never got shot at, and ain’t gonna start now LOL.
He wrote back and said it seems she’s not still doing it, doesn’t work in clubs anymore, and he wants to try to get her to work through it with him. I encouraged that (trust but verify, each be accountable, see a therapist for your own mental health not just the relationship’s), but noted it will be tough to go through.
In my own case the relationship didn’t work out, but I learned not to punish myself or hold myself unduly accountable for shit i contributed to but didn’t make happen (I was faithful throughout the marriage, but spent more time working than giving her the level of attention she needed). That has let me move on and enjoy life.
I know, there’s a whole “once a cheater…” mindset, and it does apply, a lot. But I’ve met people who make mistakes and learn from them and don’t do it again.
I saw a different married dancer for a few years; she limited services to HJs and had a “full disclosure arrangement” with her husband. She was happy, and he was ok with it tho he occasionally asked to randomly read my texts to her to make sure it was on the up and up (apparently in her 20’s she cheated once & confessed & made their deal). Eventually I even texted with him a few times, & we cleared the air that I had no illusions about her and whenever he wanted me to stop contacting her I would. He eventually did a few years later, so did I, and I presume (& hope) they’re still married. Unlike so many strippers, they talked & worked it out & made it through.
Sorry for the novella, but I find this sort of stuff fascinating.
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But bottom line, I disagree with your sanctimonious scolding and will ignore you & your effort to impose “proper” conduct (in your personal opinion) on matters you simply don’t get to decide. Live your life as you like, I’ll do the same.
43.5. No cause of action arises for:
(a) Alienation of affection.
(b) Criminal conversation.
(c) Seduction of a person over the age of legal consent.
….
There’s like 4 states that still allow it, but it’s an intentional “state of mind” tort, with a causative requirement for breaking up an otherwise “happy” marriage. Better pick the right jury LOL.
I’d be more concerned about being the next “2 AM-er” haha.
It has been the norm with my favs, that they're not totally honest with their SOs about how far they go with PLs. Also the norm that the SOs do their own greasy shit, feel entitled for her earnings from the club, feel entitled to sex on demand, entitled to be abusive, controlling generally.
Suppose you decided you weren't going to work from a company if it wasn't honest with its customers? Or you weren't going to buy from dishonest companies? Might as well head for the woods, and start trying to catch squirrels for dinner. You can't realistically set good moral standards for those you do business with. And it's more a business thing with your favs than personal. More soft-hearted than smart, but I do get somewhat personal with them. With the goal that I don´t want to seem like I think I'm better than them. But not to the point where I'm vouching for their behavior. I don't always even vouch for my own behavior.
It's also why we should be cautious about what we share via PM. Via PM there's maybe a handful of guys where we exchange lots of details. Those are guys who I've interacted with a lot here and have a history.
If it's a guy who has a good history here but I've never dealt with him, then he might get a fair amount of details, but I don't use names. If it's a guy who is brand new here, then I might recommend a particular club, but he has to find his own way after he walks through the door.
I want my favorite dancers to keep dancing. Jamming them up with boyfriends, husbands, or stalkers isn't a great way to keep them on the stage.
Best case scenario in a situation like this where a husband reaches out and you confirm what she did with you for money he confronts her and they get past it. More likely it is the final straw that ends up ending a relationship. Worst case scenario you see her on the 11 o'clock news in a story about her being killed in a domestic violence situation.
No matter which of those ways that it goes I don't want to be involved with it. It's a free country so any PL is free to say whatever they want to whomever they want, just be aware there could be consequences for a dancer that you had a good time with just because you couldn't keep your mouth shut. Also, karma's a bitch so don't get upset if a dancer tells anybody else about what you do in the club.
To the larger point: LMAO! He Married a stripper and then is doing detective work to see if she is handling customer wood. JHFC, some people can be wack. Rule 1 for marrying a stripper: her job is handling customer wood. The more and to greater depth she handles them, the better the income. That’s called heavily incentivized. Rule 2: be comfortable with rule 1 or don’t marry a stripper.
Protecting “your girls” from the consequences of their own actions is bad for even your own kids once they turn maybe 11; when you’re doing so for adult strippers, the fault is not in the stars but in yourself IMO.
Here is my advice RiskApe. Fortify yourself with some vitamin Jack and dream up ways to fuck with the husband. ROAR!!!
By this point I’d clued in from talking to that married stripper I mention in the OP, and it seemed very similar. But she wasn’t telling me about it (as the other had on like my 3rd visit), so I wouldn’t directly ask as I think that would be taken as rude. Plus maybe she’d turn LOL.
She always wore these elaborate lingerie sets, usually with Indian jewelry (bindi, nose chain, bracelets). Thick, dense, black braided (usually) hair. Really well put together, an actual LA exotic 8 or 9 (IMO) in sort of a crappy club. And not a space case in convo.
I’d take a relationship with a girl like that, IF she wasn’t lying to me about handling other dudes’ dicks. But I’m like a super-average looking white dude, and I never talk about or display my actual financial condition to strippers (it would only raise the price), so I’m sure I wasn’t her type — at least until she got to know me a little better and knew I was relatively harmless (apart from discussing her acts on the Internet, I guess).
My vote would be for him to inform the husband that the stripper told him how her husband was a total pencil dick loser that couldn’t satisfy her. Strippers tell me that shit all of the time but then again I’m a frickin’ lion so the female hairless apes just love me. ROAR!!!
Why would you suspect catfishing? The simplest explanation for something is usually the correct one. It strikes me that unless there is some reason this person might know that they could make some money off of you that they were probably who they said they are - a dude with a wife workin’ the club and crossin’ some lines.
Even without you saying anything about the girl in reviews a husband can see where folks reviewed clubs and just PM all the reviewers (assuming he was obsessed enough). If you actually described the wife in a review then he didn’t even need to be particularly obsessed. Just a pissed off dude going through reviews looking for dudes that might have fucked his wife.
I have to say that one of the most entertaining dugan threads was the one where he claimed to be texting with a disgruntled boyfriend immediately after he dugan-fucked the disgruntled dude’s girlfriend.
Can’t remember details but I do remember it was epic. In fact, I think dugan did share some details. Yes, it was a bit unethical because it might have resulted in the disgruntled dude taking his frustrations out on the girl. And it was also a little dangerous because it was possible that the dude might know where his girlfriend was fucking customers and show up pointin’ a 9mm at the dugan. Hell, it was probably a work of fiction. But it was still epic.
We need more of that shit on here. RiskA, you’re a good dude for feeling sympathy for the husband and not creating a situation that might spiral out of control. But you really missed out on some potential for wackiness!