tuscl

Ruh Ro, Shaggy…..

Tuesday, August 15, 2023 9:09 PM
Here’s an interesting DM exchange I’m having. A guy writes me and asks about a particular dancer used to see at 2-3 clubs, a CF of mine for a couple years (whenever I could find her). She was LM at first, but eventually she started giving it up ITC right towards the end. Here’s the key exchanges (names redacted). HIM: Whats her menu and rates Yeah she wears jewel in forehead ? Clit piercing ? You seen her post pandemic? ME: No, I haven’t seen her anywhere for a couple years, since ____ closed. I never got her #, always guessed she was married. Took me 4-5 VIPs before I got FS, and only at ____ close to end. At _____, it was hand jobs for the first couple, then a BJ once. I always reminded her we’d talked at length before; she remembered & knew I was a good customer. Think I had to pay $200 or 220 tip for FS, higher than I usually pay but I was into her look & style. If you DO find her, let me know. And feel free to steal my “you remember me, I’m ____” line LOL. HIM: Lol ok Yeah I’m actually her husband Just realizing how shitty she is Thanks though Could u help me set her up? Wasted 15 years of my life You’re not lying to me right? I want to make sure she’s not doing this shit anymore It’s infuriating If I give u my number could we get in touch, I want her to lie to my face ME: Huh. My ex wife turned out to be a slut who lied to me for 18 years. But ultimately it turned out better for me. Good luck, man. But I ain’t getting involved in your situation. I’ve seen several married strippers, and never even tried to get my head around how that kind of arrangement works. Probably lucky I never got shot at, and ain’t gonna start now LOL. He wrote back and said it seems she’s not still doing it, doesn’t work in clubs anymore, and he wants to try to get her to work through it with him. I encouraged that (trust but verify, each be accountable, see a therapist for your own mental health not just the relationship’s), but noted it will be tough to go through. In my own case the relationship didn’t work out, but I learned not to punish myself or hold myself unduly accountable for shit i contributed to but didn’t make happen (I was faithful throughout the marriage, but spent more time working than giving her the level of attention she needed). That has let me move on and enjoy life. I know, there’s a whole “once a cheater…” mindset, and it does apply, a lot. But I’ve met people who make mistakes and learn from them and don’t do it again. I saw a different married dancer for a few years; she limited services to HJs and had a “full disclosure arrangement” with her husband. She was happy, and he was ok with it tho he occasionally asked to randomly read my texts to her to make sure it was on the up and up (apparently in her 20’s she cheated once & confessed & made their deal). Eventually I even texted with him a few times, & we cleared the air that I had no illusions about her and whenever he wanted me to stop contacting her I would. He eventually did a few years later, so did I, and I presume (& hope) they’re still married. Unlike so many strippers, they talked & worked it out & made it through. Sorry for the novella, but I find this sort of stuff fascinating.

30 comments

  • twentyfive
    •
    10 months ago
    That is why I never comment either in private or on the board about anything I know about any dancer, or any woman actually, you see how easily a stupid comment could go south in ways that might be terrible, not to mention you are now open to a possibly be named as a correspondent in a divorce, I could even see how it could cost you a bundle if you were to get civilly sued.
  • RiskA
    •
    10 months ago
    Hahaha, I think that’s only a concern in states where people still dress like the Quaker Oats dude. There’s no liability for that in CA. Besides, she didn’t mention she was married. She chose to work in a club and take money for sex. Why are her decisions MY responsibility? Sort of Taliban-esque of you, frankly. But bottom line, I disagree with your sanctimonious scolding and will ignore you & your effort to impose “proper” conduct (in your personal opinion) on matters you simply don’t get to decide. Live your life as you like, I’ll do the same.
  • twentyfive
    •
    10 months ago
    ^ I’m not scolding you do as you please, as far as your contention that there’s no liability for the in California, I’d ask a lawyer for a list of civil lawsuits where alienation of affection is named a cause of action, but in real life the best protection against civil lawsuits is just be a broke loser, if you don’t own much, and you have a negative net worth. im sure the lawyers that feast on dopes that talk too much, will leave you alone
  • RiskA
    •
    10 months ago
    CA Civ Code § 43.5 (2022): 43.5. No cause of action arises for: (a) Alienation of affection. (b) Criminal conversation. (c) Seduction of a person over the age of legal consent. …. There’s like 4 states that still allow it, but it’s an intentional “state of mind” tort, with a causative requirement for breaking up an otherwise “happy” marriage. Better pick the right jury LOL. I’d be more concerned about being the next “2 AM-er” haha.
  • Muddy
    •
    10 months ago
    Yeah I've gotten something like that before. I wasn't intimate with the dancer I just said I saw her and got a pm asking about here and got a whole schpeel like you RiskA. Can't remember where it was or who though now, you have to delete your pms if you get too many of them.
  • mark94
    •
    10 months ago
    So, he’s married to a stripper and is shocked about what she does to make money ? He comes across as a whiny, clueless, Dick less loser.
  • ilbbaicnl
    •
    10 months ago
    LTRs seem like the longest of long shots to me. Always more lying, mind games, power struggles,, hard compromises than it's worth. It has been the norm with my favs, that they're not totally honest with their SOs about how far they go with PLs. Also the norm that the SOs do their own greasy shit, feel entitled for her earnings from the club, feel entitled to sex on demand, entitled to be abusive, controlling generally. Suppose you decided you weren't going to work from a company if it wasn't honest with its customers? Or you weren't going to buy from dishonest companies? Might as well head for the woods, and start trying to catch squirrels for dinner. You can't realistically set good moral standards for those you do business with. And it's more a business thing with your favs than personal. More soft-hearted than smart, but I do get somewhat personal with them. With the goal that I don´t want to seem like I think I'm better than them. But not to the point where I'm vouching for their behavior. I don't always even vouch for my own behavior.
  • Call.Me.Ishmael
    •
    10 months ago
    This is why no one should connect dancers by name to extras in discussions or reviews. It's also why we should be cautious about what we share via PM. Via PM there's maybe a handful of guys where we exchange lots of details. Those are guys who I've interacted with a lot here and have a history. If it's a guy who has a good history here but I've never dealt with him, then he might get a fair amount of details, but I don't use names. If it's a guy who is brand new here, then I might recommend a particular club, but he has to find his own way after he walks through the door. I want my favorite dancers to keep dancing. Jamming them up with boyfriends, husbands, or stalkers isn't a great way to keep them on the stage.
  • Dolfan
    •
    10 months ago
    He ought to be encouraged that she at least made you put in a little effort and charged above market rates. Coulda been much worse for him, your response coulda been "yeah, she wasn't that cute, but she used to me raw dog her for $50 in the parking lot"
  • drewcareypnw
    •
    10 months ago
    "Good luck, man. But I ain’t getting involved in your situation." ....OP is smart. Well played!
  • mark94
    •
    10 months ago
    There are lots of women who marry beta males but are available to any alpha male who shows interest. Supposedly, that behavior is as old as time and is a big factor in evolution and improving the gene pool.
  • whodey
    •
    10 months ago
    Things like this are why I don't mention names in connection to extras even in PMs. I'm not worried about LEOs going after a club or dancers. I am worried about significant others, former significant others or stalkerish wanna be significant others using the info against her. Best case scenario in a situation like this where a husband reaches out and you confirm what she did with you for money he confronts her and they get past it. More likely it is the final straw that ends up ending a relationship. Worst case scenario you see her on the 11 o'clock news in a story about her being killed in a domestic violence situation. No matter which of those ways that it goes I don't want to be involved with it. It's a free country so any PL is free to say whatever they want to whomever they want, just be aware there could be consequences for a dancer that you had a good time with just because you couldn't keep your mouth shut. Also, karma's a bitch so don't get upset if a dancer tells anybody else about what you do in the club.
  • Brahma2k
    •
    10 months ago
    I think everything you did was good with maybe an exception of checking the number of posts and reviews from this guy. I’m guessing he has almost none? To the larger point: LMAO! He Married a stripper and then is doing detective work to see if she is handling customer wood. JHFC, some people can be wack. Rule 1 for marrying a stripper: her job is handling customer wood. The more and to greater depth she handles them, the better the income. That’s called heavily incentivized. Rule 2: be comfortable with rule 1 or don’t marry a stripper.
  • RiskA
    •
    10 months ago
    Haha, I think a married girl’s decision to have sex for money in a public place and not work it out with her husband first is the actual root of the problem here, not a foreseeable discussion of said sex among mongers on a public forum dedicated to exactly that. If you can’t stand the heat, maybe choose not to have sex in the kitchen? Protecting “your girls” from the consequences of their own actions is bad for even your own kids once they turn maybe 11; when you’re doing so for adult strippers, the fault is not in the stars but in yourself IMO.
  • twentyfive
    •
    10 months ago
    ^ I’m not looking for an argument, nor am I looking to be a scold but dude, it’s not protecting our girls from their own actions, it’s your actions that matter, you can choose to keep silent about her behavior, or talk about it with no regard for consequences, the choice is yours, I think you’re made your decision, you need to live with it, good luck to you buddy.
  • rickthelion
    •
    10 months ago
    Imma start out by saying thank you to RiskApe. This is exactly the kind of thread that TUSCL needs more of. That said, this rick is disappointed that RiskApe didn’t take a lil’ risk and try to make things worse. Here is my advice RiskApe. Fortify yourself with some vitamin Jack and dream up ways to fuck with the husband. ROAR!!!
  • ilbbaicnl
    •
    10 months ago
    I've had some married favs who I would bet never did anything with a PL's dick outside his pants. $50 but not $1000.
  • Specialj
    •
    10 months ago
    I wanted to comment on the original post. You said that she never told you she was married, but you for some reason believed she was. No judgments here....I'm just curious what led you to think she probably was married? Perhaps it was her reluctance to give you extras?
  • RiskA
    •
    10 months ago
    @SpecialJ: she was too old & good looking for a typical stripper, she summarily dismissed OTC and FS for a year or so (in a club where it was basically part of the job description), and she NEVER talked about her personal life. She only worked sporadically, so she likely had another source of income for life’s needs. By this point I’d clued in from talking to that married stripper I mention in the OP, and it seemed very similar. But she wasn’t telling me about it (as the other had on like my 3rd visit), so I wouldn’t directly ask as I think that would be taken as rude. Plus maybe she’d turn LOL. She always wore these elaborate lingerie sets, usually with Indian jewelry (bindi, nose chain, bracelets). Thick, dense, black braided (usually) hair. Really well put together, an actual LA exotic 8 or 9 (IMO) in sort of a crappy club. And not a space case in convo. I’d take a relationship with a girl like that, IF she wasn’t lying to me about handling other dudes’ dicks. But I’m like a super-average looking white dude, and I never talk about or display my actual financial condition to strippers (it would only raise the price), so I’m sure I wasn’t her type — at least until she got to know me a little better and knew I was relatively harmless (apart from discussing her acts on the Internet, I guess).
  • RiskA
    •
    10 months ago
    But now that I’ve heard this story (if it’s true), I probably would have stopped asking, or at least asked if her husband was knowledgeable. My own wife lied to me for years, and that’s the thing I just can’t forgive even 25 years later (we had no kids and she still contacts me on some narcissistic belief I “forgave” her; but not about that). I feel for this guy, actually.
  • Specialj
    •
    10 months ago
    Yeah I suppose it's always easier to empathize when it's something you've experienced yourself. Such a crazy story...if definitely will make me think twice the next time someone here asks me for that type of information regarding a particular dancer. Thank you for sharing
  • PinkSugarDoll
    •
    10 months ago
    It sounds kind of like….the guy was a catfish…how would he even find you?? It’s too far fetched.
  • Granchorizo69
    •
    10 months ago
    People can judge but could never relate unless they were in the man’s shoes. One never knows what life brings and if falling for a dancer is part of your journey and you guys actually end up together, then it’s just like any other relationship. There has to be boundaries n trust. I think the girl should have been upfront to her husband so that he could make the decision whether he stays or leaves, she wouldn’t like it if he was going to clubs and paying girls for sex. Strippers are very competitive. Communication and transparency is important.
  • ilbbaicnl
    •
    10 months ago
    The worst case is when the SO is calling her a whore, but also complaining she's not bringing enough money home from the club.
  • rickthelion
    •
    10 months ago
    We need more posts like this on TUSCL. But I still say that RiskApe should have fucked with the husband. My vote would be for him to inform the husband that the stripper told him how her husband was a total pencil dick loser that couldn’t satisfy her. Strippers tell me that shit all of the time but then again I’m a frickin’ lion so the female hairless apes just love me. ROAR!!!
  • RiskA
    •
    10 months ago
    @PSD: Yeah I wondered about that (catfishing). But I went back and looked at my two reviews that mentioned her, and that’s where he got the lead. Several PMs I didn’t attach where he mentioned details, some not in my reviews. So possible, but in any case an interesting situation good for a discussion. In any event, I’m laying low now LOL.
  • rickthelion
    •
    10 months ago
    ^ Why would you suspect catfishing? The simplest explanation for something is usually the correct one. It strikes me that unless there is some reason this person might know that they could make some money off of you that they were probably who they said they are - a dude with a wife workin’ the club and crossin’ some lines. Even without you saying anything about the girl in reviews a husband can see where folks reviewed clubs and just PM all the reviewers (assuming he was obsessed enough). If you actually described the wife in a review then he didn’t even need to be particularly obsessed. Just a pissed off dude going through reviews looking for dudes that might have fucked his wife.
  • rickthelion
    •
    10 months ago
    I probably shouldn’t have broken character for that, but I’m genuinely curious. Frankly, unless I thought things might escalate into the husband hurting his wife (or ex) or into a f2f confrontation, I would have fucked with the husband. Okay, I probably wouldn’t do that because there is a chance the husband could get all enraged and take it out on the wife/ex and I wouldn’t want that shit on my conscience. But still, a lion can dream… I have to say that one of the most entertaining dugan threads was the one where he claimed to be texting with a disgruntled boyfriend immediately after he dugan-fucked the disgruntled dude’s girlfriend. Can’t remember details but I do remember it was epic. In fact, I think dugan did share some details. Yes, it was a bit unethical because it might have resulted in the disgruntled dude taking his frustrations out on the girl. And it was also a little dangerous because it was possible that the dude might know where his girlfriend was fucking customers and show up pointin’ a 9mm at the dugan. Hell, it was probably a work of fiction. But it was still epic. We need more of that shit on here. RiskA, you’re a good dude for feeling sympathy for the husband and not creating a situation that might spiral out of control. But you really missed out on some potential for wackiness!
  • Granchorizo69
    •
    10 months ago
    Aggression now that is scary. Girls gotta beware of dudes that get like that. But who knows this dude might just want to know to see what he might decide to do in his life. Stay, leave, go to club and fuck a bunch of other girls lmao
  • Jascoi
    •
    6 months ago
    and I'm glad I'm divorced. marriage is a trap usually of some sort or another.
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