Is the club bartender closer to being a civvie or a stripper?
Jimmybigtits
Western PA
So I'm frequenting this club a couple times per week and she asks me out. I jokingly asks if she wants money and she laughs and says "No let's have dinner. I want to get to know you.". I've been chatting with her for a month. She's never stripped but worked there for a couple years. Always been a bartender. Hard working with kids.
It feels civvie. I like her actually.
I've definitely been to clubs where the bartender is just a variation of stripper in terms of hustle and SS. But in these rural dive bars sometimes the bartender is just a normal bartender... I think...
Any way I'm going out with her but I wanted to ask the group. When you got it off with a bartender in a strip club are you wary of SS and the OTC hustle or does your mind default to thinking of her in a civvie sort of way?
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The question stands. I tend to think of most bartenders in fancy clubs as extensions of strippers with all the hustle that comes with it. But in smaller dive bars it gets hazy. I'm curious how others see it.
SJG
In My Dreams
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-55rKa7f…
However, they have heard every line in the book, and are likely very aware of CS (customer shit).
So, you must have impressed her as a good guy who she wants to hang out with. I’m sure she’s got several tests that you’ve already passed - as she’s interested.
Enjoy a nice date with her. She already likes you. This is a civilian girl who can handle herself around filthy perverts.
SJG
In My Dreams
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-55rKa7f…
Honestly you're in a better position to figure it out than we are, so I agree with 25 that it's kinda' pointless for those of us on this Board to blindly speculate. If you're not sure what you're dealing with, just accept her invitation and figure it out from there.
Everyone’s situation is unique.
What I think is that you should decide first what are your intentions, dinner and dessert, One night stand, Pump several times and dump
Just remember that her kids are probably her first priority.
You might jus be interested in P4P OTC.
Just ask her what would she be convenient for her and her kids.
God look and remember Pics and Vids or it didn’t happen.
:D
So I'm treating it civvie - like a d just letting it go where it goes. That's always the most fun when you just let life happen. If I go into "customer mode" you can get impatient and offer incentives for sex lol. I'm just letting life come to me these days
SJG
I would suggest that you always engage with them in a completely civvie manner, even though in some venues you should be handing them money.
SJG
A venue like the lawyers office when I signed the divorce papers years ago?
SJG
In My Dreams
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-55rKa7f…
Newshour
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jc7KRHO-…
There is a stereotype that single mothers are aggressive, forward, and want someone with money. A lot of single mothers banged guys who didnt stay with them, and then are looking for a nicer guy with money. When a girl asks you out it doesnt necessarily mean she likes you, it could also be she wants to use you for something like sex, your fame, status, wealth, commitment etc. the more you have any of those things the higher the chances someone could be looking to use you. This might be one of the reasons why some of these celebrities are paying to fuck escorts when they could get free sex from all kinds of civvie girls.
If guys want to partake with their wives, we have Swingers Clubs.
SJG
And TaxiDriver posted about one who always refused VIP. But once she had had a fight with her BF, she was on her back in the VIP Room ramming her tongue into his mouth as they finished up.
I would not target ones who are married.
SJG
In My Dreams
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-55rKa7f…
https://www.zzounds.com/item--GIBLPS600?…
So, I will take it off line and see where it goes
SJG isnt them being strippers meaning theure cheating too if clients getting lapdances is cheating.
Also there seem to be many many strippers with boyfriends who either know about their otc activities, or who they do it secretly from. Even if they have kids. In fact supposedly the dancers with kids are more likely to do OTC, more likely to cheat on their partner cause they’re in more need of the money
Putting that aside, I'm glad it went alright. As far as your broader topic, there isn't really much to say except: It depends entirely on the girl and the club. Practices and attitudes vary widely.
It's hard to get out of strip club mode with civvies. I'm sure I will fuck it up when we have sex. I will probably give her a hard 90 seconds, throw $200 on the bed, walk to the car and think I somehow got a good deal lol.
BTE, you pick the kinds of women you want to be with.
SJG
"Jane" by Jefferson Starship METAL COVER Feat. Type O Negative + Lucifer + The Hellacopters and More
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NDi29X2J…
SJG
Bartenders in clubs, and she's no exception, get hit on and offered money for sex just like dancers. Not rushing it is a useful strategy in the civvie context even if that's all you want. But she's cool and I might want to explore a bit more with her.
Like I said, I'm sure I will fuck it up and offer money for a blow job from one of the dancers who I didn't know was her cousin lol
SJG
Hell Is For Children by Pat Benatar
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MxYsi5Y-…
I think to engage with women, you have to listen to the little devil who is standing on your left shoulder and speaking into your left ear.
"You are king of the world and all women are here for your sexual pleasure."
You have to think that way to be able to move on them, instead of waiting for them to initiate. I mean really, she is there all dolled up for you and you are not moving on her?
In My Organization the women will be instructed, trained, and initiated to be sex slaves. They will know that it is their job to make you understand,
"You are king of the world and all women are here for your sexual pleasure."
SJG
We went out last night and decided to get a room for a few hours and it was good, solid civvie sex with no money involved.
We went out for drinks after and she said she needed a man in her life and she's like to keep seeing me. Then she said among the reasons she needs a man is it's hard to make it alone as an older single mom financially. We talked around that a bit. But nothing specific. But she made it clear she's not looking to be a prostitute unlike half the other girls in the club. It was all I could do not to ask for their names lol.
But just in case she was serious, I said let's keep talking and see how it goes.
She's not danced really in her life and hasn't bartended in strip clubs regularly.
So it's grey. But I'm leaning toward answering my question as dancer not civvie.
This woman isn’t a stripper or a slut - she’s a civilian and I respect her thinking.
It’s likely good to think about whether you are cool with continuing to see her, as you now know her intentions.
SJG