How do you handle email inquires from people that you do not know?

23 comments

• Book Guy

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  17 years ago

  In a related matter, I have an anonymous email address stalker. Heh, strange no? I am Book Guy, the REAL book guy. My associated email addresses are bookguy at mail dot com and book underscore guy at yahoo dot com. None other. But some dude a long time ago took umbrage at me for some reason, and signed himself up for book guy at hotmail dot com, book guy at gmail dot com, etc. etc., and uses those email addresses intermittently to spread ill will in my name. Sometimes he just gets bored with it. But Shadowcat, if you get a message that LOOKS like it's from me (book guy) but it's not from Yahoo or Mail Dot Com, then IT AIN'T ME.
  
  :(
  
  Plus, I just got hit in the head. No telling what I'm liable to do!
  
• shadowcat

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  17 years ago

  Oops. I just got another email from him. I didn't mean to offend him but he took it that way. He took my comment about "Dear Abbey" way too seriously. I wish him luck.
• Yoda

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  17 years ago

  I get emails from guys all the time asking about Providence clubs and dancers. I have no problem recommending clubs and talking about contact levels but I almost never mention specific dancers. The only exception would be if it's a handle I recognize. I also get the occasional email from dancers who read but don't post on TUSCL asking what I know or think of a club that they might be thinking of trying out.
• ClevelandTom

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  17 years ago

  I have sent emails to TUSCL members asking these types of questions.
  
  I understand your concern so I wasn't surprised when one member didn't really answer my question but another did.
• casualguy

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  17 years ago

  I typically would not tell others what a dancers real name is. They trusted you enough to tell you and you are betraying that trust if you go around blabbing it to every one you just met. I understand your point of view quite clearly. Even if I was ticked off at a dancer I wouldn't do that. She would have had to do something really bad to get me angry enough to seek revenge like that. Typically if a dancer gets me angry enough, I'll throw away her phone number and forget about her perhaps even avoid her for a while. I remember one dancer got mysteriously ticked off at me (I never even knew why) and she quit working that club for 2 or 3 months. Then she came back.
  
  I also don't see the point in knowing a dancers name before you met her. If you don't ask her in person, she'll think you're creepy for already knowing her name and she'll give it to you anyway if you develop a relationship with her first. Some dancers avoid people who seem to know them. I've heard that before while in the clubs.
• ThisOldManPlayed1

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  17 years ago

  I had received an email from a fellow TUSCL member last week, asking me for names of dancers I had encountered at several clubs. I didn't personally know this person, but after checking his status on this website, I felt at ease about the email. Unfortunately, I really didn't recall dancers' name at the couple of clubs that were in question, because they didn't stand out amoungst my favorites. And in addition, I had a friend run an FBI check on the member, and found out he wasn't a cop.
• Book Guy

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  17 years ago

  ... FBI check? ... eek ...
  
• chandler

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  17 years ago

  I tell them I don't know anything, which is usually the truth. If they're too creepy I put them in junk mail. But Shadowcat, aren't you always encouraging people to email you? Maybe I'm reading you wrong, but now it sounds like you're turning around and complaining when they take up your offer.
• shadowcat

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  17 years ago

  chandler: I like to get email and I don't mind giving them my personal advice. I just don't want to give out personal information about my favorite dancers to guys I don't really know.
• Book Guy

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  17 years ago

  I've gotten some emails from people who just outright demanded to know stuff. "So, does Melissa at Club Bubble do blowjobs?" I think they forget that email is a DIFFERENT level of intimacy and anonymity, from web boards. On some boards, it's actually easy to confuse the "reply by email" function with the "post a reply to the board" function.
  
• ClevelandTom

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  17 years ago

  I am the person that asked Bones for some guidance and I am indeed not a cop. I do appreciate the help. One question? Do I have any skeletons in my closet?
  
• chandler

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  17 years ago

  Shadowcat: OK, I see. It's just that those are the kinds of emails I would expect to get from people looking for more info than you share on the site. I understand that you don't want to give that out, but I wouldn't fault them for trying.
• chandler

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  17 years ago

  Book Guy: I think some people don't quite get the concept of a discussion board. They seem to believe their computer is one-way information-dispensing box, and all our nicknames represent tiny all-knowing creatures inside it who exist to provide answers for them only
• AbbieNormal

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  17 years ago

  Chandler, do you mean that we DON'T collectively know everything? Man, I'm going to have to look at Wikipedia a little more skeptically.
  
  Back to the point, I pretty much agree with Shadowcat's threshold. If I were to get e-mail (and I have) from a poster on the board I'd probably answer it. If it were a lurker who never posts I wouldn't feel obligated. Of course I rarely have the kind of intimate knowledge Shadowcat and a few others do, so most of my replies would be harmless.
• FONDL

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  17 years ago

  I've gotten emails from people asking about specific clubs that I've mentioned but never about any specific dancers. I usually answer as honestly as I can but never discuss any illegal activities, which I frankly know very little about. Shadowcat, the reason you get so many questions about individual dancers and extras is becasue you're always talking about specific dancers and extras.
• chandler

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  17 years ago

  FONDL: That's a better version of what I've been trying to say to Shadowcat, along with the factor of him always posting about exchanging email with other TUSCLers.
• ThisOldManPlayed1

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  17 years ago

  We all have skeletons in our closet, I agree. My apologies ClevelandTom for doubting you. Anytime you want to make a meet in Cleveland, send me another email & we'll have a beer or two together.
  
  I don't think that exchanging emails is that dangerous between TUSCLERs, as long as it two-way communication, where both can get advice.
  
  CAUTION: As a former COP... if a detective ever emails you about a criminal incident, there is no requirement on his behalf to advise you of your rights. Speaking from a friend of mine. Any attorneys out there want to challange this?
• DougS

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  17 years ago

  I receive very few emails regarding clubs, dancers, etc., from people that I don't know. That's mostly because I have my email address hidden - though a few months back it was still visible.
  
  I'm also one of "those" that will email someone that I don't know, asking for details, and I know some of you reading this post have received such emails from me. Sometimes I will read a review (usually about one of my fav SCs), and I will want further details. Or, if a dancer is being discussed without her name being mentioned and I suspect it could be one of my favs, I may email to find out.
  
  I've gotten to "know" several fellow TUSCLers via email discussions, and am very glad for it. To those that I feel that I "know", I will usually be forthcoming in my responses, if I trust them. However, I usually will be tight-lipped when it comes to my favs, especially my ATF, unless I am pretty confidant that the info will not harm her, or possibly come between her and I.
  
  
• FONDL

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  17 years ago

  Bones, years ago after writing an explicit reveiw of a club visit, I received an anonymous email from someone wanting to know if I'd participate in a phone discussion of the club. I never responded. But I did contact the person who wrote the previous review of the club and he received the same email. I figured cop or news reporter. I've never been that explicit in a review again. Nor will I.
• shadowcat

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  17 years ago

  If Bones ever flashes his badge at you. Look at it real close. I think that he may have got it at "Toys R Us".
• Book Guy

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  17 years ago

  I once pinned a Toys-R-Us type of cheap fake badge very deeply inside a jacket, where it would make a bulge and be barely visible if someone suspicious really sought to find it, but otherwise would disappear. Then I attended a strip club. Every girl just got blase about it immediately -- their attitude was, "Whatever, I fuck cops all the time. Want a lapper? Blowjob? Same price. By the way, you should leave your badge at work next time. Oh! It's not a REAL badge."
  
• ClevelandTom

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  17 years ago

  Hey Bones. . .
  I sure wasn't offended by your post because I tend to be a pretty laid back guy. Shoot me an email next time you are in the area and I'll see if I'm free to buy you that beer.
  
• ThisOldManPlayed1

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  17 years ago

  Just shot an email to you Tom. Hope we can meet up.