Strip Club "dos" and "don'ts"

Do: Take the money you are willing to spend in cash.
Don't: Use the club ATM or any kind of plastic.

Good idea, both for newbie advice and humor.

Do: Bathe and wear clean clothes.
Don't: Drench yourself in cheap body spray like they do on TV ads.

Do: Try to catch a dancer's name when the DJ announces her.
Don't: Pay attention to everything the DJ says.

Do: Politely say no thanks when you don't want a dance.
Don't: Try to explain why you don't want a dance.

Do: Think with the big head more than with the little one
Don't: forget the best dances often don't come from the best looking dancers.

Do: Try the dayshift if you can. Less crowded and better chance to get to know a dancer
Don't: Fall prey to the $2 bill scam being run by some clubs

Do: Always remember that you and she are there for two entirely different reasons - you're there to have a god time but she's there to work, it's her job, and she deserves to be compensated for her time just like you are when you're at work.
Don't: Never forget that she's not there looking to meet guys, she's there looking to meet money.

Do: plan your finances in advance, and bring only as much money as you are willing to spend.
Don't: visit the ATM.

Do: Try talking to her like she's a regular girl you met at a bar (except you really know you'll see some T&A!)
Don't: Be intimidated.

Do: Feel free to gawk and stare at the strippers on and offstage.
Don't: Gawk and stare while they're giving a lap dance nearby.

Do: Approach a girl you want a dance from, if that's what it takes.
Don't: Approach her while she's with another customer.

Do: Enjoy yourself within the limits set by the dancer.
Don't: Engage in inappropriate touching unless she clearly gives permission.

Do: tip the door girl if she is young, good looking, friendy and sexy. Door girls have done me some favors.
Don't: ever tip a "Bird Dog" or any other male employee. You are there for the women. Not them.

Do: Go for the pussy if she plays with your dick or rubs your nose in it or if she pulls that thong aside and puts it within an inch of your mouth.
Don't: Assume that all dancers at the same club give the same mileage.

Do: Accept $1 bills. All you have to is ask for your change the way you want it.
Don't: Accept $2 bills if you don't want them. Don't accept silver dollars, if you dont want them.

Do: Accept extras, if she brings it up and you want and can afford it.
Don't: Ask for extras.

Do: Accept GFE OTC's, if she offers and you want it and the price is right.
Don't: Assume that because she says she will meet you OTC, that she will actually show up.

Do: except reasonally priced dances.
Don't: Accept any dance without first asking the price and maybe what her rules are.

Lasty
Do: find a strip club that you like that has good looking, high mileage dancers that charge resonable prices. Get to know the dancers. Repeat appearences by you will get you higher mileage with each visit.
Don't: run around from club to club hoping for the big score. You have to work at it.

Igiveup says: "Do: Accept extras, if she brings it up and you want and can afford it.
Don't: Ask for extras."

I disagree. My rules would be:

Do: hint clearly about your desire for extras.
Don't: solicit for prostitution in a manner that could either get her in trouble, or brand yourself as a vice cop.

Oh, and the all important:

Don't: tip, or otherwise give income, to women who are simply too unattractive to be stripping for a living; DON'T BE AN ENABLER OF THE BLUTO-ETTES!!

Do: Get dances from a stripper with an open mind.
Don't: French kiss a stripper with open cold sores.

Do: Show them your love for their stage dancing.
Don't: Show them your erection.

I can tell, these are going to help a lot of people.

BG: I agree with you. Hint all you want. But if you ask a dancer for a dance or extras your are putting yourself in a position of being too willing and thus unable to bargin for the best value. With my favorites, I don't have to negotiate. They know me, They know what I like and want and they know what I expect to pay for it. No hassels. But with dancers new to me, I let them make the first move. Then I have the power to compromise or reject.

Do: Chat with a dancer before you commit to getting a dance (which includes negotiating a price up front)to see if she is your type.
Don't: accept a dance from a dancer that approaches you from behind in the seating area unless you know her.

Do:Always take care of your bartender. She/he can be a lot of help in getting to know the right dancers.

Don't:mis-spell good in a strip club site, IE:"...you're there to have a god time but she's there to work,...". Thanks, FONDL!

Do: Enjoy the moment and the entertainment.
Don't: Fall prey to dancer con jobs telling you how much more you can get for x more dollars because she really likes you.

Do: Check your wallet and keys immediately after getting up after a lapdance.
Don't: Trust dancers you just met to tell you the truth.

Do: Enjoy your time with a dancer
Don't: Expect it to turn into anything

Do: Dress in slacks.
Don't: Dress in jeans if you're going to get friction dances. Keep keys, pens, etc. to a minimum.

Do: Bring a predetermined amount of cash for VIP's
Don't: Charge for the "house bucks" -- the surcharges and tips can be insane.

Do: Know the club rules and your favorite dancer rules.
Don't: Do anything I wouldn't do and if you do, don't get caught.

Do: Bring ear plugs to especially loud clubs.
Don't: Forget to put them in especially if your ears hurt.

Do: Say you're waiting for the club special dance price.
Don't: Agree to a lap dance without asking how much it costs.

Do: Count the songs while getting a lap dance.
Don't: Assume the dancer will stop if you say nothing. She'll charge you for extra songs at full price.

Do: Bring lots of one dollar bills if a club refuses to give them out in change.
Don't: Forget to bring only the cash you're willing to spend.

Do: some research before you travel. That's one of the benefits of this site and it can keep you from being tossed/roughed up for touching in a 6 foot rule city. Conversely it can keep you from beating your head against a wall if you don't find out they offer friction/extras until after you've left the club.
Don't: ever, Ever, EVER get in a taxi and ask the cabbie to take you to the best strip club in town.

Clubber, sorry about that - it's bad typing skills, not spelling. I've noticed that since I got my new computer I'm doing much more of that. I'm probably not always hitting the keys hard enough and so sometimes a letter doesn't register. Hopefully I'll improve with practice. But to return to the subject:

Do insist on good value for your money, just like you would anywhere else - if you think you're being cheated, leave.

Don't hang out in clubs that are grossly overpriced. Find one that isn't. You don't have to spend a lot to have fun.

Actually, Clubber, I have had a god time in strip clubs. At least it felt like a religious experience.

FONDL,

LOL...

I think most all of us can agree with the point of having a religious experience!

As for typing, you are correct. In my years of computer work, I can't tell you how many users complained after a new keyboard was installed. Some even blamed the k/b for typos!

DO: Go for VIP if regular dance is good, per dance cost often less when you buy multiple dances.// DON'T: Ever spring for multiple dance or VIP package without trying single regular dance first.// DON'T: Believe that "things will get better in the VIP". Check's in the mail, and I have a bridge to sell you.

Don't: hide in the shadows if you see someone you might know. He's as guilty as you are, if he's in there too!

Do: Avoid high end "Gentlemen's Clubs" at all costs.

Don't: ignore the small, neighborhook strip clubs. some of my best times have been spent in these "holes in the wall"

Do: Avoid places like Orlando, Raleigh, Chattanooga, Richmond, Augusta GA. They all suck

Don't: Think places like Atlanta or Charlotte are good just because they have lots of clubs. They are ok places to see nude girls and drink a beer. No more, no less. More like a nude Hooters than a real strip club.

Do: remember Strip clubs are supposed to be fun

Don't: forget the girls who may be a little older, a little heavier, a little plainer. Based on my experience, many of those girls give the best dances.

Do: Get plenty of sleep before taking any late night strip club visits.
Don't: Leave too late and risk falling asleep while driving.
Driving while asleep is very dangerous.

Don't: drink and drive.
Don't: drink Jaegermeister and drive.
Don't: drink Jaegermeister.

Great DO's and DON'TS guys! Keep up the good work.

Do: When posting a review of a club, give an overall rating.
Don't: Rate a club strictly on mileage and dancer's looks. We all have particular tastes.

Do: When posting a review of a club, provide missing club details such as hours, ethnicity, food, etc.
Don't: Post a review of a club with only YOU in mind.

Do: Post reviews ending with whether you recommend a stop off for others. Remember, your posted reviews can help other decides to visit or not.

Do: Engage a girl in meaningful conversation, after small talk with her shows chemistry between the two of you.
Don't: Get engaged/date a dancer and expect her to stop dancing, even if she's a college student or has a day job--the money she earns dancing is usually very, very good.

Have to disagree with Book Guy. Jaegermeister is good stuff.

Do: drink Jaegermeister with one of your favorite dancers.
Don't: drink Jaegermeister with her if she can out-drink you.
Don't: drink Jaegermeister alone.

Do: Tip the DJ if he plays extra songs at the end of the night for you to get more time with your Favorite girl.

Do: Tip the dancers on stage.
Don't: Tip the "bad girls" on stage unless you are willing to get yer bare ass whipped with your own belt in public and the waistband of your undershorts ripped off and pulled over your head...

do: Spend money on the girls you like..they'll stay in the business.
don't: but overpriced drinks for the girls..they'll dance for you whether you by them a watered down drink first or not.
do: bitch to the club owners about short songs
don't: do anything the dj suggests

Do: tip the DJ if he's good. It's only a buck, and he never gets any attention, and the management will probably notice that a regular (and high-spending) patron bothered to notice him. Heck, mention it to the management. There are enough bad DJs out there!

Do: tip your waitress a couple bucks during private time to get a little extra time for your buck.
Don't: Be afraid to tell a girl you're not interested in "no thank you."