Four Near Death Experiences
reverendhornibastard
Depraved Deacon of Degeneracy
I know of four instances where I was nearly killed or at least where I could have been badly injured.
I wonder how many other close calls I’ve experienced without ever realizing it.
1. Bombing at the J.W. Marriott - August 5, 2003: I had just concluded a meeting at the Patra Jasa office building near the JW Marriott in Jakarta’s Mega Kuningan office district. It was lunch time and I was hungry. The JW Marriott had a terrific lunch buffet so I instructed my driver to take me there. But at the last minute, just when my driver had to turn left to go to the JW Marriott or turn right to go back to my office, I changed my mind. I was too busy to waste time on a leisurely lunch at the JW Marriott. As we were approaching my office I received a phone call. My office was conducting a head count of employees and wanted to verify that I had not been at the Marriott when the bomb went off. ( https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/2003_Mar… )
2. Silk Air Flight 185 - December 19, 1997: I narrowly missed flying on Silk Air 185. I was booked on an Singapore Airlines flight from Jakarta to Singapore but was aware that Silk Air #185 departed Jakarta about one hour earlier. Since Silk Air was a subsidiary of Singapore Airlines I knew that if the Silk Air flight wasn’t full I would be allowed to board the Silk Air flight despite being booked on Singapore Airlines. Once at the airport I rushed to the Silk Air ticket counter. The Silk Air flight was still at the gate but the flight had already been “closed.” I had to wait for the flight on which I had been booked. Upon arrival in Singapore it seemed to me that an astounding number of people at Changing Airport were suffering from bad colds. It wasn’t until I boarded a taxi and the driver commented on the Silk Air #185 disaster that I realized all the people with puffy red eyes at the airport did not have colds and that I was lucky to not have caught that Silk Air flight. ( https://en.m.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?t… ) I had been seeing a married Indonesian woman at the time. When she heard about the crash of Silk Air flight 185 she incorrectly assumed I was on that flight and became hysterical in front of her husband. She ended up getting a divorce.
3. Bomb on The Strand in London July 6, 1990: I took a taxi early one morning from my apartment at the Barbican Centre to Victoria Station where I would hop on the Gatwick Express. The taxi drove along the Strand. It wasn’t until my flight arrived in Houston that I heard that a small bomb had exploded in London along the Strand only a few minutes after I had passed in the taxi. ( https://api.parliament.uk/historic-hansa… ) I doubt if I would have been killed in this bombing, but it would have probably at least scared the pee out of me.
4. The Lockerbie Bombing - Pan American Flight #103 - December 21, 1988: I flew from London Heathrow to New York JFK that day. Obviously, I was not on Pan American flight #103. Friends who knew I was flying from London to JFK that day kept Mrs. Hornibastard #2 away from the news reports on TV until they determined that I was not flying on Pan American. ( https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pan_Am_F… )
I wonder how many other close calls I’ve experienced without ever realizing it.
1. Bombing at the J.W. Marriott - August 5, 2003: I had just concluded a meeting at the Patra Jasa office building near the JW Marriott in Jakarta’s Mega Kuningan office district. It was lunch time and I was hungry. The JW Marriott had a terrific lunch buffet so I instructed my driver to take me there. But at the last minute, just when my driver had to turn left to go to the JW Marriott or turn right to go back to my office, I changed my mind. I was too busy to waste time on a leisurely lunch at the JW Marriott. As we were approaching my office I received a phone call. My office was conducting a head count of employees and wanted to verify that I had not been at the Marriott when the bomb went off. ( https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/2003_Mar… )
2. Silk Air Flight 185 - December 19, 1997: I narrowly missed flying on Silk Air 185. I was booked on an Singapore Airlines flight from Jakarta to Singapore but was aware that Silk Air #185 departed Jakarta about one hour earlier. Since Silk Air was a subsidiary of Singapore Airlines I knew that if the Silk Air flight wasn’t full I would be allowed to board the Silk Air flight despite being booked on Singapore Airlines. Once at the airport I rushed to the Silk Air ticket counter. The Silk Air flight was still at the gate but the flight had already been “closed.” I had to wait for the flight on which I had been booked. Upon arrival in Singapore it seemed to me that an astounding number of people at Changing Airport were suffering from bad colds. It wasn’t until I boarded a taxi and the driver commented on the Silk Air #185 disaster that I realized all the people with puffy red eyes at the airport did not have colds and that I was lucky to not have caught that Silk Air flight. ( https://en.m.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?t… ) I had been seeing a married Indonesian woman at the time. When she heard about the crash of Silk Air flight 185 she incorrectly assumed I was on that flight and became hysterical in front of her husband. She ended up getting a divorce.
3. Bomb on The Strand in London July 6, 1990: I took a taxi early one morning from my apartment at the Barbican Centre to Victoria Station where I would hop on the Gatwick Express. The taxi drove along the Strand. It wasn’t until my flight arrived in Houston that I heard that a small bomb had exploded in London along the Strand only a few minutes after I had passed in the taxi. ( https://api.parliament.uk/historic-hansa… ) I doubt if I would have been killed in this bombing, but it would have probably at least scared the pee out of me.
4. The Lockerbie Bombing - Pan American Flight #103 - December 21, 1988: I flew from London Heathrow to New York JFK that day. Obviously, I was not on Pan American flight #103. Friends who knew I was flying from London to JFK that day kept Mrs. Hornibastard #2 away from the news reports on TV until they determined that I was not flying on Pan American. ( https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pan_Am_F… )
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9 comments
The closest I ever came to a near death experience Was November 1982 flying from NY to Florida on the same day another flight also headed to Florida, crashed into the 14th street bridge in DC, I arrived in Florida In those days pre cell phones to frantic gathering of relatives at FLL it seemed half of my family thought I was on that ill fated flight.
The good Lord obviously wanted you to enjoy a few more years of degradation in strip clubs before he banishes your soul to an eternity of fiery torment.
Not as cool as the reverends or skibums but i have a few:
hit by a speeding suv while on my bike as a kid, landed on my head on the street after flying over the car. One of the few times i wore a helmet as a kid, even after that lol. Would have had serious brain injury, at the least, without one.
Found out the hard way i had a severe insect allergy when i was a toddler. Almost suffocated due to throat closing.
Inches away from being run over by a taxi when in a fight that spilled into a busy street from the sidewalk.
Jumped by a couple dudes after some bullshit involving a friend at a bar. Left unconscious in the middle of the street after being hit in the temple with a beer bottle(s?) and a bunch of punches to the face. My only time knocked out. I came to being dragged out of traffic by friends from the neighborhood.
Was working on a scaffold that got hit by a car but luckily didnt collapse fully. Scary as fuck though.
Was speeding (prob going 70 mph) on a country road, hit a bunch of snow, lost control and went into a ditch that then launched me into a field where i barrelrolled a couple times. All the glass blew out when the roof and frame dented from hitting the ground. Eventually landed on the tires in the middle of a field with a small scratch on my arm and the beatles still playing on the radio, dirt and broken glass everywhere in the cab. Absolutely surreal. Had my seatbelt on or i would have been totaled along with the truck, thanks mom!
Nearly taxed to death on a daily basis by nj governor Phil Murphy. Everydays an adventure for the assman!
The police cruiser which was parked in the gas station right there saw the VW roll end over end several times. Being pre-seat belt days, my date’s face went through the windshield and then snapped back in through the jagged glass. I was told that it took over 200 stitches on her face alone. I wAs unconscious with a concussion and broken ribs from the steering wheel.
Her twin sister told me that their father prohibited her from seeing me again.
That could have been it but I lived to regret it.
Average 120 lbs. on my 17th bail, i lost my footing and fell under the truck. The driver failed to see me because he was drunk. Ran over me with all 8 wheels; 4 axels. Swished my ass like Wile E Coyote into the ground. I lived.
Second time was 2 years later when I was riding on the bed of the flatbed truck hauling hay on backroads HWY at 60 miles an hour with nothing but 4 foot trenches filled with dirt and rock for shoulders. The truck slipped of the HWY and tossed me into the ditch at 60 mph. I slid for about 75 yards before coming to a stop. I brokevthe fall like I was trained to do in Martial Arts and wound up surviving.
My third was when I was crossing the street in Kansas City when a truck turned the corner and came directly at me at about 40 mph. The only thing I could do was jump straight up into the air, pull my
Feet up into my chest and aim my ass directly into the oncoming hood of that vehicle. It actually worked because I hit the hood, then rolled up the windshield and off the drivers side hood to finally hit the ground. I then stood up and gave the driver a dirty look. She flipped me off. What a CUNT!
I’ve had a few others, but those stick
Out in my head for some reason.