Military Humor

avatar for doctorevil
doctorevil
Evil Lair
A crusty old Sergeant Major found himself at a gala event hosted by a local liberal arts college. There was no shortage of extremely young, idealistic ladies in attendance, one of whom approached the Sergeant Major for conversation. She said “Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you seem to be a very serious man. Is something bothering you?”

“Negative, ma’am” the Sergeant Major aid, “Just serious by nature.” The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and said, “It looks like you have seen a lot of action.” The Sergeant Major’s short reply was, “Yes, ma’am, a lot of action.” The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said, “You know, you should lighten up a little. Relax and enjoy yourself.” The Sergeant Major just stared at her in his serious manner.

Finally, the young lady said, “You know, I hope you don’t take this the wrong way, but when is the last time you had sex?” The Sergeant Major looked at her and replied “1955.” She said, “Well, there you are. You really need to chill out and quit taking every thing so seriously! I mean, no sex since 1955! She took his hand and led him to a private rom where she proceeded to “relax” him several times.

Afterwards, and panting for breath, she leaned against his bare chest and said, “Wow, you sure didn’t forget much since 1955!” The Sergeant Major, glancing at his watch, said in his matter-of-fact voice, “I hope not, it’s only 2130 now.

25 comments

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avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
6 years ago
Good one. :)
avatar for Jascoi
Jascoi
6 years ago
lol.
(i took it as the year too.)
avatar for Nidan111
Nidan111
6 years ago
Lol. Now THAT is funny!!!
avatar for flagooner
flagooner
6 years ago
LOL
avatar for jackslash
jackslash
6 years ago
LOL
avatar for gammanu95
gammanu95
6 years ago
Good one .
avatar for future POTUS and Senator in training
I dont get it
avatar for doctorevil
doctorevil
6 years ago
Nicole: Because fhe military operates 24 hours a day, it uses a 24 hour clock for time so that there is no possibility of confusion as to whether a stated time is a.m. or p.m. So 1955 is 7:55 p.m. and 2130 is 9:30 p.m. if you still don’t understand, find a crusty old sergeant major at your schools ROTC department and he can explain this joke to you.
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
6 years ago
As soon as he said 1955, I knew where this was going. Good one though. I like it.
avatar for Clubber
Clubber
6 years ago
Saw it coming, but still a good one!
avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
6 years ago
How many of you have seen this movie from 1955?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XXv7ziTP…
avatar for jackslash
jackslash
6 years ago
Great cast:
Henry Fonda
James Cagney
William Powell
Jack Lemmon
Betsy Palmer
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
6 years ago
LOL
avatar for Jascoi
Jascoi
6 years ago
seen it a few months ago. good flick!
avatar for flagooner
flagooner
6 years ago
It's a classic. I didn't realize it was that old.
avatar for Clubber
Clubber
6 years ago
sc,

Never saw it and never had a desire to do so. I've never been much of a movie person unless a particular actor or actress catches my eye. Then I will look for their work.
avatar for nicespice
nicespice
6 years ago
Smash that like button
avatar for flagooner
flagooner
6 years ago
@Clubber. I'm guessing the actors you refer to are Ron Jeremy and John Holmes.
avatar for orionsmith
orionsmith
6 years ago
The university I went to used military time to schedule all the class times. I was wondering if that was standard at other schools as well. Guess not.

Reminds me of a joke about some frightened old ladies that were scared to drive or even ride on some of South Carolina interstates. I26 wasn't bad but after they got off of I95, they said they were a nervous wreck. They thought the interstate number indicated how fast you had to drive.
avatar for pistola
pistola
6 years ago
Great Joke the fact the Nichooooool didn’t get it has me roflmao
avatar for flagooner
flagooner
6 years ago
LOL. I have her on ignore so I didn't see her comment.
avatar for DeclineToState
DeclineToState
6 years ago
@shadowcat, check out all the LOLs @doctorevil got - you gotta step it up pal, come on you can do it
avatar for DeclineToState
DeclineToState
6 years ago
^oops, I meant jackslash
avatar for flagooner
flagooner
6 years ago
Jack is still the master. He has just raised the bar for his submissions, and hitting on one is a bit easier than hitting on one a day.
avatar for flagooner
flagooner
6 years ago
And Jack's are mainly riddles.
They often elicit groans. ;-)
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