Having Too Many Favorites a Bad Thing?
trapdoor
California
IDK if this is really an issue, but at my favorite club, I'm starting to develop rapport with three dancers (all of which I have their numbers and message about my next visit). Granted, I've gotten to know each at different times, but they all can be working at the same time as one is a day girl, the other a mid-day, and the third comes and goes whenever (but mostly during the day).
My long-time favorite, who I've known for years, understands, but I'm worried that I may create an uncomfortable situation if the other two don't play nice. Now, all three have been true professionals and I've never heard one speak ill of any other dancer, but am I creating a potential issue? Not sure you can ever have TOO much of a good thing, but I don't want to appear as though I'm ignoring a favorite cause I'm spending significant time with one of the others.
My long-time favorite, who I've known for years, understands, but I'm worried that I may create an uncomfortable situation if the other two don't play nice. Now, all three have been true professionals and I've never heard one speak ill of any other dancer, but am I creating a potential issue? Not sure you can ever have TOO much of a good thing, but I don't want to appear as though I'm ignoring a favorite cause I'm spending significant time with one of the others.
20 comments
Competition is the American way !
3 is probably workable
Okay, now all joking aside...
First and foremost, it's not your job to coddle their emotional well-being. You are there to be entertained and should spend your time with whomever you wish. They are not your friends and each probably cares more about a pimple on her ass than she does about your emotional health.
Whether there is drama depends partly on you and partly on them. You can minimize some of the drama by making it clear on each visit who you are there to see. Just have a sack. What you can't control is what they do behind the scenes. I've had potential favorites suddenly drop out of contention for no apparent reason, only to learn weeks or even months later that they were intimidated or outright threatened by another dancer. So yes, juggling multiple favorites can cause issues, especially if one of them is more of an alpha than the others. Conversely, in other places it was no problem at all.
So just do what you do and let the chips fall where they may.
If it's really an issue for you, then talk to one or all of them about it. Let them know that you like variety. That's why you're at a strip club and not on Match.com.
If you treat it like high school drama, then it will become high school drama.
Probably not going to work but it is an interesting possibility.
Good luck and let us know how it turns out.
I *did* have a problem once. Girl A told girl B that I belonged to A and that B shouldn’t bother anymore. Fortunately, someone else told me about it, and I told girl A that if she ever did anything like that again, she’d never see another dime of my money.
If they don’t understand that it’s my choice who I want to see that night, then they can choose not to take my money.
So, when I have more than one girl I'm seeing: I text one to make an appointment. If she responds back and confirms, then we have an appointment and she's the girl I'll be with (this is the way I like to SC, one girl per visit). If, when I walk in, I see another fave of mine, smile, big friendly hello, "I'm here to see Kinzie today, Porsche, but thanks for saying hi, come by our table if I can buy you a drink! Looking forward to catching you next time!" and that's that.
If you want to maximize drama, the best way to do that is to behave like a little bitch. Be too scared to tell the girls what's up. Sneak around hoping that Kinzie never catches you with Porsche or vice versa. When you get to the club, be unclear as to which you're hanging out with today, because you're scared of hurting Kinzie's feelings, so each girl thinks she has a claim on you. Letting the two girls work things out amongst themselves, especially considering the amount of ego and bragging rights at stake, gives the best chance of drama among the girls and you. Being confident, firm, friendly, and direct in telling them what's what with you (and your wallet) today, will yield you the best chance of a drama-free trip (or at least, lower chance of you seeing it).
If you're a "hang out with multiple girls per trip" guy, then just change that to "Hi Kinzie, I'm hanging out with Porsche for a bit, then would love to come find you".
One recent example for me is a girl who I hit it off good with and even took OTC, but then who avoided me like the plague over the next few visits. Apparently another favorite, who I also took OTC from time to time, and her cousin cornered this girl in the DR and made some nasty threats. I didn't even learn about this until weeks later.
In another example, in a club where the dancers self policed supposed customer stealing, other girls wouldn't come near me even when my favorite dancer was out. It was so bad that when I cajoled another girl to give me a LD, she did a shit job and then went to the other one and apologized for giving me the dance.
I have several other examples, but you get the point. You cannot completely control how these girls behave with each other. So by all means enjoy yourself as you want and manage it with all the firmness you can muster, but also understand that there could indeed be unintended consequences to having multiple favorites.
Odds are you'll like more than one girl at any club as a customer, just call both over at the same time. Its actually fun. Lots of looks from other customers...
There was a recent SW thread that I found off-putting with its advocating violence on other dancers. https://www.stripperweb.com/forum/showth…
My guess is that the probability of a situation like this depends on the customer turnover, or lack thereof.
But I agree that it’s on you, and you may have to reach out if some favorites “shirk away.” Probably good for negotiating OTC if that’s what you’re into.
But drama can always happen in a strip club and there are two kinds. The drama you created or contributed to and the drama you can’t do a damn thing about. I think Subraman gave good summary advice, as did others. I would just add that it would be good if you prepare yourself for losing one, two or all three of these girls. That’s going to happen sooner or later anyway.
Something I learned long ago in business is to be willing to walk away from a deal that goes bad. So my advice is to enjoy all three while it lasts. Don’t apologize for having three you like. Be straight forward with what you want and have good manners. But walk away from all three or the club if it becomes more trouble than it’s worth.
As in any sales type job, competition can often be fierce and cutthroat - a dancer being nice, polite, and understanding, may often lose out on business especially to the more cutthroat dancers - i.e. you can only control you but you doing your part as the cu$ty can often go a long way towards things running more appropriately or setting the proper tone.
Dancer manipulation of PLs is part of the SC bizarro-world - i.e. as regular, or just being a previous custy, means a dancer that knows you will often come up to you as soon as she sees you and act as if you are manna-from-heaven to where the avg PL then feels bad about sending her off or not spending any $$$ on her "b/c she's so happy to see you" - so it def takes having some sorta of gameplan as Subraman mentioned in order to navigate SC bizarro-world.
As Subra mentioned, being straightforward is the best way to go - as soon as a PL shows one bit of weakness/apprehension/lack-of-balls, it's like blood-in-the-water for the sharks.
No way a PL can please every dancer (unless he's just wealthy to where $$$ is no object, o/w it's not really feasible) - and with dancers, often times the more you give the more they will expect - i.e. trying to be "Mr Nice" or "Mr Can't Say No" will usually be an unsustainable downward spiral.
A PL should constantly remind himself, even if he has to repeat it to himself in the club, "the strip club visit is about me" - sounds selfish but it's not - it's really the only practical way o/w you end up spending all your $$$ trying to please the dancers vs enjoying your visit as you'd like.
But - it's not a bad-idea to be somewhat political - i.e. just sending her off on her way may bruise her ego in addition to being pissed about losing out on your $$$ - so buying her a drink and/or giving her a little tip as you let her know the deal does something to smooth the situation.