It's the season of being contacted by your past

avatar for Warrenboy75
Warrenboy75
Anywhere in the USA on any given day
It doesn't matter if the women are dancers, SB's, escorts, or civilians. If the relationship was transactional or if there was something there in terms of friendship or even more. If it was short term or long term, or if it was someone from last year or years ago.

I commented on this last year but I seem to be off and running with the ghost of past encounters/relationships this year as Thanksgiving approaches.

I'm always curious why. Obviously if something ended it did so with a reason and speaking only for myself if I ended seeing someone for whatever the reason the bottom line is I no longer thought the good outweighed the bad.

In the last 24 hours ( and we haven't hit the Christmas season yet) I 've had an ex "favorite" me on Seeking Arrangement. I have two e-mails from two different ex's checking in to see how I am doing, and a text from another woman wanting to let me know if I am ever back in her area to call her so we can get together for a drink or two.

This isn't a humble or not so humble brag. I'm honestly mystified on why this happens. In all four cases there were good reasons why the get togethers stopped. The cynic in me of course thinks it is all about the money.

Still I'd like to get a real female perspective as well as the men ( trolls can keep under the bridge if possible)

Lets face it if I wasn't good enough to hold her attention at one time what's with the attention now?

16 comments

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avatar for RandomMember
RandomMember
6 years ago
I've had that happen in September, last two years. Especially 2017. It has more to do with school expenses than anything remotely romantic.

I do have a few past SBs who are out of state and hear from them now and then.

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twentyfive
6 years ago
Lack of money is a major motivator especially at this time of the year.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
6 years ago
In my limited experience it often has to do with them wanting holiday $$$ so they can buy expensive gifts vs what they can afford
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
6 years ago
Black Friday seems to get women horny
avatar for skibum609
skibum609
6 years ago
It could also be that they are recalling only the good things in the past, as all humans tend to do at the holidays, and are reaching out to see if they made a mistake.
avatar for ei8ht_Ball
ei8ht_Ball
6 years ago
A lot of the girls I attract at strip clubs have mental health issues. When it's done it's done, and I never hear from them again. The one I'm seeing now has it together in all areas, including the mental health department. She says that when we're done with our thing she'll still want to be friends and keep in touch. I can't tell if she means it or if it's just a line to make me feel important to her while I'm helping her out, but it doesn't matter. I'm older and more mature and I understand that when she moves on in life she might occasionally look back fondly on the time we spent together, but it's unlikely that she'll want to keep in contact with a customer from the club as she pursues a normal life.

Warrenboy75 - what's the age difference with these girls? The ones I go after are roughly 20 years younger, so I really don't expect much contact after it's over. If they were closer in age it might be different. Or perhaps you just have something going on about you that I've never had.
avatar for Player11
Player11
6 years ago
They are in need of money. Perhaps client base slacked off. Clients may run out of money or move on to another target.

For a past one to be contacting u money or loss of big ticket client key. Or a relationship may have ended but their being in a relationship has not been a factor in them wanting meet up. Usually I would be rotating 2 on roster.

Another reason is if they back from out of town. Katy came back from Ariz after a couple of years. Pop was offered 120 covered and 200 bb. She had She was a 5 star fuk and I was excited reconnect w her. She was working as college counselor but like most of them still played.

Whether escort, stripper, or SD site gal they are sex workers play for pay. Makes no difference.
avatar for Player11
Player11
6 years ago
All of these gals I gave done around half my age - or much younger - present sb 30 y younger. They like fucking and money - money trumps all.

I believe in French method - my age divided by 2 plus seven yr - optimal girl that or younger.
avatar for Player11
Player11
6 years ago
One stripper I did over a year her best friend got involved (after threesome) in wanting meetup then her best friends room mate.

So one stripper otc whore yielded 2 bonus girls.
avatar for Warrenboy75
Warrenboy75
6 years ago
ei8ht_Ball--the difference is anywhere between 28-34 years with the ones I am referencing.

With the SA girls I tend to look at things the same way you do. You have fun and when you don't or when someone's life changes you move on. I've been on SA for nearly seven years now. One of the things you notice is how often women move these days. They disappear from the area you met them in ( and if you are like me and travel a fair amount) you suddenly see them in another part of the country.

Some are in school and finish --nurses, teachers mostly- and their life changes, along with their need for money. It's a good ending and an understandable one.

This is probably just me overthinking things which I do at times but my first impulse when I see these text or e-mails out of the blue is something went off plan with their lives or that dating people their own age doesn't measure up to what and how they recall the past.
avatar for nicespice
nicespice
6 years ago
I wanted to allude to the fact that November-december is supposed to be the time for “cuffing season”—when the holidays makes people lonelier and people seek others out.

...But apparently that’s a concept that circulated around with no hard science backing it up.

avatar for ei8ht_Ball
ei8ht_Ball
6 years ago
"the difference is anywhere between 28-34"

Good for you Warrenboy75. Even if they are contacting you purely for financial reasons, you should view this as a sign of success in life. My experience has been that the guys who get re-contacted the most are polite, respectful, have other redeeming qualities, and don't jerk the girl around when it's time to pay. They might remember the creepy guys for the rest of their lives, but they don't ever contact them again. There's an art to "dating" girls that much younger in the p4p world, and it sounds to me like you're doing it right.

"my first impulse when I see these text or e-mails out of the blue is something went off plan with their lives or that dating people their own age doesn't measure up to what and how they recall the past."

This is probably true. But how many guys do these girls swap contact information with? They remembered you and they contacted you? Yes, they need money, but a lot of these girls are in a position to be selective with regard to how they go about it. If you want to see any of them again, then I suggest you enjoy it for what it is.
avatar for Cristobal
Cristobal
6 years ago
The optimist in me wants to believe the holiday season leads to reflection, sometimes regretting decisions and wanting to make amends.

However, the cynic in me believes it's only about the money.
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larryfisherman
6 years ago
They got a lot of people they have to give Christmas presents to.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
6 years ago
"... My experience has been that the guys who get re-contacted the most are polite, respectful, have other redeeming qualities, and don't jerk the girl around when it's time to pay ..."

Often times it's b/c the dancer finds a particular PL more manipulatable/easier-mark, than the "jerk"
avatar for JamesSD
JamesSD
6 years ago
Money. It's pretty well established dancer money legitimately sucks during the holidays.
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