How to avoid your loyalty from being taken for granted...
PaulDrake
Off again on again PL
So as I am a guy who tends to stick to one dancer at a time and come to the club once a week. With my CF it seems that my reliability and loyalty is starting to be taken for granted. She is definitely not at all worried about losing me as a customer and is acting as such.
Obviously not all dancers do this, some are fiercely defensive of their regulars. But it does seem like there have been a lot of similar gripes on here from other PLs.
First off for my current situation I need to not be a little bitch and just make it clear what I want from my CF. And with future favs probably make it clear that I value and expect priority whenever possible.
I have also considered tipping extra for it, bad idea?
Thoughts?
Obviously not all dancers do this, some are fiercely defensive of their regulars. But it does seem like there have been a lot of similar gripes on here from other PLs.
First off for my current situation I need to not be a little bitch and just make it clear what I want from my CF. And with future favs probably make it clear that I value and expect priority whenever possible.
I have also considered tipping extra for it, bad idea?
Thoughts?
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25 comments
Kicking up your spending level some could help, but she may have sensed a plateau that she can't break out of and figured out that you're not going to be spending at whale levels on her. An extra $20 or so here or there is probably not going to help if that's the case.
When it gets stale like this w/ a CF or club, often switching to a different club for a while can reset it. When you visit again in a month or two, you can potentially get the best of both the new guy glow and trusted old regular thing going on resulting in more approaches by a variety of dancers / better treatment by the ones who remember you from before.
Unless you're already unfairly underpaying her, tipping extra is a really bad idea. If anything, with my ATFs, I tend to get better service for less $ than other customers pay... the fact that I see her regularly and consistently, treat her well, etc., is an advantage to her in and of itself. That said, I've heard some prices mentioned by guys where they're paying her $100 for hours and wondering why she's getting progressively less satisfied. I pay fairly, I don't overpay, and expect significantly better treatment than a random customer who pays the same amount.
I think you'd be better off getting a side bitch or paying a neighborhood ho. Being a regular is one of the worst things you can be to a stripper.
And I'm with Subraman on this. You don't need to over tip and over time you can actually tip a bare minimum of "fair" and she won't mind because you are steady income for her.
I have had brief "talks" with my ATF DS and her backup CF both in order to establish that they should consider me a priority as soon as I arrive. And to come over and tell me exactly when we can spend time together so I know where we stand. And also I make it clear that at most I will wait 30 min and any longer I will leave or see another stripper for that visit. I don't demand too many rules or expectations because that makes the relationship too robotic. Also I do remind them that the reason I'm their regular is because they put priority on me and give me a little more time and attention than other customers. That's their reward for good behavior. And if they don't like it I will move on. I have a ton of other Portland clubs that I can visit and be a regular to another stripper. Lather, rinse, repeat.
I used to have a regular who would only pay between 100-140 each time showing, but he would come in at the quietest times to monopolize my attention. If there was someone better paying at that time I would go elsewhere but he took it nicely when that happened.
Hmmmm I get the sense someone here is grinning ear to ear... (hint: his name rhymes with subratan) :P
Now I think some guys are too worried about having the upper hand, me, as long as I'm having a good time and paying what I think is fair, I don't worry about it. YMMV
But yeah, unless you’re being overly demanding or something, her behavior seems to be pretty odd at this time. Summers everywhere are the “slow season”
LOL I resemble that remark. On the other hand, I would not put up with this: "If there was someone better paying at that time I would go elsewhere but he took it nicely when that happened." On the OTHER other hand, I pay more than $140
That's basically what i do -- pick an ATF who gives me awesome service, make appointments with her to see her during her slowest time so I can monopolize her. Only way to fly!
Let's just call him Subra M, wait too obvious, how about S. Man. :P
I've seen dancers comment about some regulars being too-needy/clingy/demanding to where he's not worth the effort - i.e. it *does* take two to tango in that it's not always necessarily the dancer's fault.
Sometimes it seems some dancers may recent that they feel they are going the extra-mile to consistently please a regular and they may feel it is the PL that takes her for granted for not being more generou$ considering the extra-effort she puts in - i.e. if she feels she's leaving $$$ on the table by trying to keep just an "ok spending" regular, she may start resenting this over time and may feel she's getting short-changed taking into account what she puts in.
As others have mentioned, one has to sorta work w/ her - e.g. pick a slower time where her other income is not being as affected; making an appt, etc - and as in any "relationship", communication is important and you and her may need to try and work out something that will work for the both of you.
Some dancers *do* get lazy and start taking the regular for granted; often times spending time w/ other dancers will "get her back in shape"; and sometimes she's just ready to move-on.
I have mixed feelings about going to other clubs and the like. If it's done to help YOU get your head straight, or give her some time to figure out if she values you as a regular, go for it (I've definitely known strippers who hop-to when they see you with another girl). If you're dreaming up schemes to "make her jealous", that's a bad sign that you're way over-invested. If you're looking to branch out to other girls and scared/intimidated to do so in front of her, you're way over-invested. I know these things because I've done them all :)
I would never be a regular to a stripper that kept price creeping on me.
hang a little bit with her and then enjoy other ladies on your visit. variety is the spice of life.
The moment that happens, it's time to give her the ol' "heave ho." ;)
Seriously, you can't rehabilitate them once this starts, at least not for long. I don't run into this too often anymore as I vary clubs and nights more than I used to, but in my early days on this site I remember telling stories about girls who took advantage of perceived ownership - so much so that other girls were afraid to even approach me.
Good luck!
I'd avoid the club if there is another one nearby for a bit and see if that gets you a text or communication of some sort......not for long and not if there isn't some other place nearby of equal quality......and if not I'd go back and simply pay attention to any other dancers that might interest you. ( which is what I did when it happened to me some time back)