Where can I find girls like her on the East Coast?

South Main Street, Worcester, Mass. Pull up to the curb and waive her over.

You mean the *entire* East Coast?

This is why many (correctly) assume that you're a troll.

You can find her at the Trolls and Titties Club, in Troll Lake, NJ.

I’d get there soon - before someone mistakes her for one of SJG’s robotic humanoids!

Any massage parlor that has lady boys. May wanna contact Mamisan.

Okay by east coast let's say north of virginia

Oh! If you narrow it down like that, I'd say try Trollsville

Hang it up, man.