Does a dancer have to know some personal info to be a favorite?

9 comments

• FONDL

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  18 years ago

  I think it's easy to read too much, either positive or negative, into personal questions. Let's face it, a lot of these girls have limited social skills and aren't very good conversationalists, especially when there's a vast age difference. They also don't know a whole lot about the outside world so there isn't much they can talk about intelligently other than the latest movie, TV show or rock band, none of which interest me. So they rely on the easy way out, which is to ask a bunch of personal questions. Maybe they really want to know, but I think usually they're just trying to make conversation in the only way they know how. Personally I'd rather they do that then just sit there like a bump on a log. The other thing I like about a girl asking me personal questions is that I interpret it as tacit approval for me to do the same. That will help me get to know her better, and will often lead to finding some common interests, which then gives us something we will both enjoy discussing. Otherwise we may quickly become bored with each other.
• DougS

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  18 years ago

  Chandler: I think you made an important distinction which had escaped me until now. The favorite girl versus an ATF. I agree, I can have a fav girl that is "all business", just great dances that I enjoy and a decent rapport and not feel like I need to exchange personal information, etc. On the other hand, for her to become an ATF, there has to be more on the personal level. The time spent with her needs to be a GFE. In my warped mind, once a girl starts taking an interest in me by appearing to want to get to know me, more than my wallet, it FEELS like there is a more intimate connection. When she starts divulging personal information to me such as real name (first and last), family names and goings on, where she lives... meeting me outside of the club, etc., she crosses a line and our "relationship" moves to a different level. I'm sure the dancers are well aware of the fact that by doing and saying certain things, it's easy for them to make us think that we mean more to them than just a handy ATM. But if you can weed through the SBS (stripper bullsh$t), you hopefully can get an idea of how genuine your "relationship" is. Of course, therein lies the rub (no pun intended). Does she or doesn't she harbor any feelings for you, or is it all just an act. Common sense and experience tells you that it's all just an act; an act that you must enjoy at face value, without reading more into it than what there actually is. (now, if I can just take my own advice... [wink])
• Mickkeyc

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  18 years ago

  Does the color of my bedsheets count as personal info (LOL)
• chandler

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  18 years ago

  This could be an interesting thread if we opened it up a bit. Does the sharing of personal info make a difference because it shows the dancer is interested in you, or because sharing stuff like that deepens your feelings for each other? Or is it simply an inevitable result of having talked enough over time that the subject is bound to have arisen? For me, only the last tends to be the case. Random facts come out eventually, although most of what we share is opinions and feelings, not data, which, BTW, I find to be the most effective in establishing the rapport that improves mileage. The way Jpac poses the question, it's almost as though she's showing an indifference to you as anything but cash machine. Does a stripper who never bothers to ask about your job or marital status deserve to be considered a favorite? Actually, one of my turnoffs is getting the interview treatment right from the start: What do you do where do you live are you married any kids. It usually strikes me as a contrived way to get acquainted when I'd prefer that she flirt with some imagination. But I'm sure some guys like that, and it works to develop an attachment. Then, would the answer be different for a favorite than it is for an ATF? I think so. A favorite can be most any girl I've enjoyed getting dances from and would enjoy again if the opportunity came up. I have a lot of faves I've known and chatted with for months or years without getting into personal stuff. An ATF, at the minumum, is a girl I would go out of my way for. I think the assumption is that you spend a lot of time together beyond what it takes to get dances, and you've developed a rapport. For me, that doesn't necessarily mean sharing personal info, but it's more likely to have been mentioned in the process.
• casualguy

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  18 years ago

  I like it when a dancer says she isn't counting that short crappy song the DJ just did and then says the next song starting is the second of the two for one she is doing for me. In other words if the DJ cuts the song short, she doesn't go along with the DJ. Some of the weird DJ songs I can't make heads or tails of when a song is starting and stopping. If I keep hearing that crap and it causes problems with counting dances, I just won't bother getting a dance.
• casualguy

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  18 years ago

  A dancer doesn't need to know any personal information to be a favorite and visa versa at least for me. If she treats me like I'm her hot boyfriend while I'm in a strip club and treats me good, that is all she needs to do. The second a dancer starts taking advantage of you or taking you for granted though, such as skimming on dances or claiming she danced more than she did, she won't be a favorite anymore. Favorites come and go like dust in the wind.
• DailyGrind

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  18 years ago

  I literally and pointedly ignore anything that comes (sigh)out of a hotties mouth that does not maintain or advance the fantasy. Qualifications for a favorite is pure personal preference. My favorite is only perfect while onstage. But I blow her off if she approaches me with anything but seduction. She knows this- and could have every dollar I bring to the club- but, in turn, goes out of her way to derail my fantasy (by being overtly 'friendly'). We both enjoy the game. In addition, many dancers simply harvest 'regulars' (often using the misnomer 'friends') to avoid as much bullshit introductory chat with strangers as possible. To answer the topic question: No. DG
• FONDL

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  18 years ago

  I don't especially think it's a requirement for you to know personal stuff about each other, but I've found that if you sit and talk to each other a lot it's very likely to happen.
• chandler

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  18 years ago

  Not at all. I like strip clubs as an escape from all that. I don't encourage talk about personal stuff, so a fave will usually follow suit. If we do go there, it might be because our sexual flirtation has run out of steam, which would make her less of a fave. Sometimes, I've realized at a shockingly late juncture that she doesn't even know my name. She may have a name for my penis, but I'm still "you".