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Avatar for flagooner
flagoonerEverything written by this member is a fact.

About an hour ago I submitted a review for a club I visited while in Sactown. With all the talk about how contribution scores are calculated I want to make sure I maximize my points.

Please let me know if you have any suggestions for how to spruce it up. If any of your suggestions have merit, I will edit it andsend a PM to founder and ask him to repost.

Club: Pure Gold

City: Rancho Cordova, CA

Review:
I’ve been out in California on a business trip this week and decided to hit a club before my flight out yesterday. Whenever I travel to a new city I try to research it and the most important part is the reviews on TUSCL. There are three clubs in this part of the city, and based on the ratings this one fell right in the middle. Not too pretentious, but also didn’t sound like I had to fear a 2AMer in the early evening either.

I got there early evening. This club is different than what I’m used to. It is really more of a sex toy/lingerie shop with a small dance club attached. Kinda weird, but since I was there I thought I’d give it a go. The club portion is really small, only about 10 dancers on shift, but they seemed to rotate in and out of the dressing room so only about 4 or 5 on the floor at any one time. There were about that many customers too so the ratio was good.

I grabbed a beer and sat at the bar watching the stage as I figured that would give me a decent chance to see what kind of talent there was and who might give the best service. I was a bit disappointed. The first 2 strippers I would generously rate as 4s. On my scale that equates to slightly below the average looking girl you would see walking down the street.

The 3rd girl wasn’t much better, probably a 5, but I got the impression that she might be the best the club had to offer because as soon as she appeared one of the customers (an obvious regular) almost sprinted to pervert row. She was alright, but the interaction between the two is what really entertained me. He reminded me of a cross between Sheldon and Howard from the show The Big Bang Theory, really socially awkward but seemed to think of himself as some kind of a Don Juan. He was practically drooling at the stage and she looked bored. He wasn’t making it rain, but he must have tipped about $20 over the course of two songs so she wouldn’t leave him.

I walked up and gave her a dollar out of pity. For that dollar she reached down and gave my package a nice prolonged rub and then turned around and practically ground her bald piss flaps on my nose. When she peeled herself off me, I glanced over at the loser sitting at the stage and he had this pouting puppy dog look on his face. I almost felt bad for him.

When this girl was done with her set the guy waited at the bottom of the steps and let her to the table he was sitting at before moving to the stage. As she passed by me she silently mouthed, “Help me please.”

After a couple minutes I decided to have a little fun and play a real dick move. I walked over to their table and excused myself. I said something to this effect, “Excuse me, I see that you two are together and obviously have chemistry, but today is my last day in town and I have to be at the airport in about an hour. I was really hoping to spend a few minutes with this beautiful lady if you don’t mind.” He protested but she assured him it would be okay and would come back to him when I left.

We went back to the bar where we each had a shot of Patron. She introduced herself to me as Paradise. The only people I could think of that would consider her paradise would be convicts in solitary confinement and the guy I poached her from. Anyway, she reached down and slid her hand up my leg and started fondling/stroking me inside my shorts. I get hard when the wind blows so within a couple of minutes she put on her sales pitch to put her efforts to good use.

She led me back to one of the booths and started unbuttoning my shorts before I even had a chance to sit down. Before the second song ended I was shooting a blast against the roof of her mouth. She took it like a champ, actually showed me the puddle on her tongue before gargling with it and taking a big swallow. I paid up and we spent another couple minutes just relaxing before going back out to the club.

When we exited the booth, the dork was staring straight at us with this Droopy the Dog expression. She thanked me for the momentary reprieve and then trudged back over to the guy. She gave him a lingering DFK and then sat down beside him. He just smirked at me with an oddly triumphant smile. I just laughed all the way to my rental car and headed off to the airport.

Comments

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Avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive

So was that a bareback gum job with a toothless trollop ;)))

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Avatar for Bj99
Bj99

Oh, that was nice of you to save the girl, but that poor other guy. Sounds supper pathetic. Did you catch him crying on your way out? Maybe he’s so used to the taste of other men’s jiz that he didn’t notice, or he was so happy for the kiss that he didn’t even mind.

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Avatar for TFP
TFP

Damn, you've outdone yourself with his one Flagooner! Lol dude might have to go the Dougster route and just bounce from the site.

Are you gonna score the club all 10s like he does?

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Avatar for Cashman1234
Cashman1234

Flagooner - in the essence of full disclosure - you should mention that you accidentally backed into an old corolla with vanity plates that read “MDB2203” as you pulled out of the parking lot...

Lol! Great story. I hate to be rude to other men in the club, but I’m not sure you stole a dancer from a male customer...

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Avatar for realDougster
realDougster

Good review effort flagooner, a little light in some spots, you could have been more verbose. Intro was okay, but needed more details on Club Layout and Dancers. Conclusion was good, however.

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Avatar for flagooner
flagooner

^ I'm not Papi. I don't go into that level of detail.
And it was a Saturn, not a Corolla.

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Cashman1234

My mistake! I didn’t realize Saturns came in that shade of pink...

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Avatar for Daddillac
Daddillac

Lol, I was just thinking of taking a trip out to California to see this girl paradise that mdb is in love with.... now that I know she swallows and probably snowballed him a little I'll be sure to make the trip

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Avatar for Cashman1234
Cashman1234

It’s odd - as I am heading out to Sacramento too! I’m going to see Good Day Sacramento being taped - and I’m hoping that I can slip a few $$$ to Paradise so she will come as my date! It will be worth the extra $100 so she leaves some of my load on her cheek!

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Avatar for shailynn
shailynn

Are you in California auditioning for another role in the next Muppets movie?

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ppwh

The joke's on you. That guy got a front-room makeout session!

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Avatar for Bj99
Bj99
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Avatar for max_starr
max_starr

oh that was a great story you had me on edge and even cringing at the climax....I don't think I could bring myself to do this yet.

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Avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive

TL;DR ;))))))

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Avatar for flagooner
flagooner

^ Are you referring to the tattoo on my dick?

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Avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive

;)

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Avatar for Huntsman
Huntsman

Good review. But are you sure the parking lot incident involved a Saturn, not a huffy bike?

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Avatar for flagooner
flagooner

Damn, the "editorial staff" apparently didn't think the review was worthy of posting.

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Avatar for Supremeruler
Supremeruler

Theres an editorial staff? Why does so much garbage get posted?

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