Feeling a little pathetic

avatar for theDirkDiggler
theDirkDiggler
Illinois
Have you ever gotten a text from a favorite begging you to visit her on a slow day? And then sheepishly go and spend a crap load on her really making her day/night? I just did. At the time, it felt great. The girl was extremely appreciative and it showed during her dances, but the next day i feel that i probably didn't use my best judgement. Remember that i practically always plan my visits. This was definitely unplanned as my last visit wasn't that long ago. I definitely can't sustain this rate of spending...

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avatar for mark94
mark94
7 years ago
You got good service and banked some good will. Next time, just spend a little less freely. It’s all good ( unless her texts become a weekly occurrence ).
avatar for theDirkDiggler
theDirkDiggler
7 years ago
^ That's what i'm a bit worried about (weekly texts) as the holiday season is a slow time for most strippers.
avatar for jackslash
jackslash
7 years ago
It's more pathetic when your CF calls you and asks for money for some emergency and you just give it to her without receiving anything in return. But you feel it's OK because she loves you, right?
avatar for shailynn
shailynn
7 years ago
I remember this one girl I was wild about worked in a town I didn’t get to very often. I was in town for 3 days and the first day I got in really late and told her I was tired and wasn’t sure I’d make it in to see her that night.

I did go in, and sitting in a corner (I didn’t have a usual spot in the club) she picks me out in a heartbeat from walking out of the dressing room. I said “how did you know where I was?” (It was a huge club) and she said “I knew you weren’t going to pass up seeing me.” Yeah total PL moment.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
7 years ago
Seems you had a good time so that's good - I "assume" your concern is not being strong-enough to not go every time she texts you to go see her - it's a PL paradox for many of us (whether to SC when we want-to/feel-like-it or when we should, it's a call many of us have to make
avatar for Doces300
Doces300
7 years ago
I have done that same thing before, was on my way to a football game when she texted asking me to come to the club and of course I ran my butt to see her. I felt pathetic afterwards because yes on a dead night I spent 2 hrs in VIP with her plus tipped her. Hmmm wonder why she thinks she can get 1k OTC from me. I am a true PL.
avatar for Lurker_X
Lurker_X
7 years ago
I encourage them to text me with deals and "opportunity pricing". It happens all the time on booking websites for hotels and flights. Why not for strippers?
avatar for theDirkDiggler
theDirkDiggler
7 years ago
@Papi
It's not just not seeing her. That's the easier part. Once i'm alone with her in the club, the money just falls out of my pockets. She is just so intoxicating to me. No amount of clubbing experience has developed an immunity in me to her. Especially if she is going to up her dances. It's hard to believe that she can still improve when she already does everything i like the way i like it. Even as i was overspending, it was torture for me to end the dances. It doesn't help that she is super sweet to me.
avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
7 years ago
I guess that I am too old to play their game. I was in lust with a cute spinner and I mean true spinner at my favorite club. We had done several very good VIPs and I had asked her about OTC at my house. She said that she was up for it but every time I tried to make a date, I failed.

Then one evening I get a text from her along with a sexy photo and she wants to come over tonight. I wasn't prepared for that and really didn't want her coming over at 9PM. I'm a day guy. So I told her "Not tonight but lets get together during the day time soon".

Next time I went to the club I found out that she had moved to Texas the day after she had called me. At least she didn't get any traveling money outta me. :)
avatar for Huntsman
Huntsman
7 years ago
When the cock gets hard, the brain goes soft, and vice versa.

avatar for theDirkDiggler
theDirkDiggler
7 years ago
@Lurker_X
I suppose with the holiday and post holiday season, where a plethora of girls are trying to squeeze blood from a stone, i might have a chance for deals, but the girl is popular and tends to do well. She just ran into the perfect storm of too many girls (and hot ones that also give good dances too) working and literally a handful of customers in the club. NO ONE at the club was doing very well, except her AFTER i showed up. She needed money (surprise) and drove over an hour and was freaking out that she of all dancers might actually have a really bad night (under $100 for her).

I also don't want to offend her by going the discount route. There is nothing "discounty" or stingy about her dances with me (and i don't that want to start either) and i feel it only appropriate to be generous in kind to her.
avatar for joc13
joc13
7 years ago
I'm expecting 2 or 3 of those as the end of the month/beginning of the month comes up.

Even had one that I had a falling out with suddenly want to make up out of the blue, but I don't really go to her club much, so it didn't really matter.

But, my CF from this time last year had the same effect over me. So, I understand what you're going through.

@Doces The frequency of visits ITC and amount spent were also probably why that CF thought she could raise our OTC rate by 66% at the last minute. Wish I knew then what I know now.
avatar for theDirkDiggler
theDirkDiggler
7 years ago
@shadowcat
That sounds more like a missed opportunity than something to be pleased about. I mean you did save money, but saving money (although a hard habit/mindset to quit but a very good habit) seems less important to me the older i get. Besides general quality of living, the only reason i save now is to enjoy life when i can enjoy it.
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
7 years ago
-->"Have you ever gotten a text from a favorite begging you to visit her on a slow day? "

Yes, all the time

-->"And then sheepishly go and spend a crap load on her really making her day/night?"

SHEEPISHLY go? Never. I tell my CFs specifically to text me on slow days, exactly because of what you experienced, "appreciative and it showed". On a slow day, I'll be able to hang out with her for hours and hours, she'll show her appreciation ... and it's nothing but an advantage to me that she knows that if she's having a crap day and making no money, I can often come through for her.

One caveat: some girls DON'T appreciate that you're their slow-day guy... in which case, fuck them. Many girls appreciate it, my budget is too limited to spend time with a girl who doesn't.

So, in summary: I specifically instruct her to let me know when it's slow so I can try to come in, and with the right stripper, I am more than paid back in bang-for-my-buck great service and "Free" (except for price of drinks) hanging out time & front room groping.

Don't be sheepish; own it, muthafucka
avatar for theDirkDiggler
theDirkDiggler
7 years ago
^ Actually, i think she wants me only to go on slow days as she can consistently bank on weekends. The thing is the value per time is greater on weekends as they cut the songs noticeably shorter on weekdays (at least 25% or just over 3 minutes instead of 4 minutes or more). Also i have a better "relationship" with the bouncer that works weekends, so he doesn't come around as often or almost not at all except maybe every 20-30 minutes, and when we do a large number of dances, he'll also undercount about 10% or more again maximizing value. They also do promotional features almost every hour burn time to promote, but don't count as dances when they promote them which buys me a couple free dances worth every hour with my favorite. The actual promotion also further discounts a couple dances. This isn't available during slow shifts. So the amount of fun time i spend in less than two hours during the week would have last me over three hours on a weekend.

I wish i could do the SJG/Subraman and i guess SirLapdancealot front room action for "free", but whatever front room stuff we do pales greatly to what we do in the LD area.
avatar for ppwh
ppwh
7 years ago
My preference is for her to let me know when it's a slow night rather than to have her split her attention or compete on money with other customers. It sounds like she's trying her hardest to treat you well, but you're too much of a pussy to allow her to.

If you're sick of getting screwed on dance times during the week, tell her so. Maybe she can put in a word with the DJ to run longer songs when you go for dances with her. I have had arrangements like that.
avatar for theDirkDiggler
theDirkDiggler
7 years ago
^ i don't think the DJ is going to run songs longer on weekdays. The stages are completely empty and the girls are mostly just mailing in their performances just begging to get off the stage. Also the girls have to go on stage unless they're doing dances, which they're less likely to be doing on weekdays so they can get on stage quicker. On the weekends, the stages aren't that much better, but some people go to the stage. Also the DJ (a different DJ) talks a lot more between songs on weekends instead of just going to the next song on weekdays. And sometimes the DJ will loop the last minute of the song as they try to find another girl on stage, since many of them are busy getting dances buying extra time. This is a high end club and i've never heard of a customer controlling the song length there.

Even on weekends, she definitely gives me first priority when she sees me and will stay with me unless i tell her she can work the rest of the club if she wants. And she doesn't rush off when i tell her that, but almost reluctantly leaves asking if i'm sure, so her service skills are excellent. She also never asks for dances unless i bring it up. My preference has been and always will be seeing her on weekends. Now if it weren't for those danged texts. I know this is a somewhat unique situation in my case, but it is what it is.
avatar for Cashman1234
Cashman1234
7 years ago
In my view - you had a great night - and I’d say enjoy the memory of your great night. You have the control to not let the spending get out of hand. A splurge every once in awhile is fun.

It’s like you treated yourself to an early Christmas present -
avatar for ppwh
ppwh
7 years ago
My approach would be to communicate my objections - ie., shorter songs are a non-starter with me, so I'll see her on the weekend.

If the club decides to kill its weekday income by making dances effectively more expensive during off nights, that's their own business. At one of the clubs I go to it's the opposite situation where during the off days the two-fers are $20 less than on weekends.

If she can work it out on her end that the songs will be the same length, that would be enough to interest me. It sounds like you're only really interested in weekends regardless, though. Maybe you could suggest something not in the club for the days you don't want to go to the club or she can satisfy herself that you're going to see her at all.

If you think it's worth it to compensate her for putting forth a comparatively better effort than the other dancers, then give her a tip. That's how I do it.
avatar for theDirkDiggler
theDirkDiggler
7 years ago
@Cashman
Yeah, it was like early Christmas. And yes, good memories, unforgettable and addictive really, although i'm more of the enjoy the present/moment kind of guy than a reminiscing /reliving the past guy. And i doubt this is the last before Christmas. Sigh...

@ppwh
I do agree in principle with everything you said. The club is notoriously slow most weekdays, and is heavily reliant on regulars for any girl to make money those days and is one of the few times the VIP/CR is probably better value (for the customer of course). In hindsight, i probably should have gone that route. Unfortunately, she doesn't do OTC, not for lack of trying...


Now enough about me and my story. How about the rest of you? Do you go visit your favorite stripper at her whim?
avatar for ppwh
ppwh
7 years ago
> Do you go visit your favorite stripper at her whim?

Generally, yes, because it offers me a better experience. The rationale is that if she is motivated enough to contact me that day, she will be motivated enough to make the visit worthwhile. I respond to ask if she will sit with me if I go in to set the expectation that I'm not interested in being one of 5 guys who show up and wait around after she sent out a mass text.

As I said, it's generally a win/win/win for me, getting at least the experience I would have hoped for on a random night, often at a lower price from the club, and the money I spend adds to her income rather than causing her pick between customers.
avatar for Bj99
Bj99
7 years ago
I tend to take the risk when I have the opportunity to do a favor for someone I have a good relationship/friendship/work relationship w. You get to see if they are decent appreciative ppl. If they are, it deepens trust and reciprocity. If they aren’t, you stop wasting your time on them. You can always have a circle of decent ppl.
avatar for larryfisherman
larryfisherman
7 years ago
No shame in your game, if you had fun and didn’t go broke, then that’s all that matters.
avatar for theDirkDiggler
theDirkDiggler
7 years ago
^ If it continues at this rate, i will certainly go broke...
avatar for Cashman1234
Cashman1234
7 years ago
If I get a text - I’ll consider the time of the month - as the first few days some dancers are shitting thinking about making the rent - and some will be very appreciative. Similarly - as we get closer to Christmas - dancers will be looking for extra $$$ so they can buy a new gaming console for their out of work boyfriend. They’ll tell you it’s for their kid - but we know who’s laying on the sofa the most in their apartment!!!
avatar for cubbieguy
cubbieguy
7 years ago
Any thought to just asking her to see you OTC? Especially if she had a slow day this might be a good opportunity. It sounds like when you go to the club you give her all your attention and you want all of her attention. Seems like a win win to me.
avatar for theDirkDiggler
theDirkDiggler
7 years ago
^ Already been covered. She did finally give me her number and several months, so the door might be slightly open, but for now it is unlikely. It is just not her personality right now.

Again, maybe i should ask a different way. Any of you guys wrapped around a stripper's finger?
avatar for theDirkDiggler
theDirkDiggler
7 years ago
^ After several months not and...
And i do realize that it was probably so she could have a get out of jail free card in her pocket just for nights like the one in the OP...
avatar for theDirkDiggler
theDirkDiggler
7 years ago
@BJ99
That is a good point. She did seem and continued to be genuinely appreciative. Probably more than i can recall any other stripper being with me. If that earned me more points with her, great. Hopefully, it might become something more real, at least in the strip club world. She already can virtually do no wrong from my point of view so again, i'm probably in worse shape than before...
avatar for skibum609
skibum609
7 years ago
I have had the same ATF for 12 years and our lifetime total of texts is 0. If my dick gets hard and tells me to go I do. Saw my ATF Friday and I am her "I don't feel like working right now guy". If it is busy and she is working we don't even say hello. If it is slow we will hang out and shoot the breeze for an hour or more; smoke some weed; hang out and then most of the time, but not all do a room. I know a lot of her regulars and am amazed at what they spend, but not as amazed as I am by the fact that I am still in the rotation despite being one of her shittiest $$ customers.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
7 years ago
"... Any of you guys wrapped around a stripper's finger? ..."

KInda a loaded-question - best if it was a thread onto it's own
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
7 years ago
DD posted: "I suppose with the holiday and post holiday season, where a plethora of girls are trying to squeeze blood from a stone, i might have a chance for deals, but the girl is popular and tends to do well. She just ran into the perfect storm of too many girls (and hot ones that also give good dances too) working and literally a handful of customers in the club."
***************************************************************************************

That's when you offer her an OTC earning opportunity.

The hottest and most charismatic girls are often the hardest to get OTC because they tend to do well ITC, but almost every single good club earner that I ever took OTC was snagged on a night just like that one. So many of these girls burn through their money so fast that it doesn't matter what they made two nights earlier, but rather only what they have in their pockets when they walk in and what they need to pay for the next day.

But instead you went in and made her fat and happy ITC. To each his own I suppose and it's your money to spend how you please, but that smacks of a wasted opportunity to me.
avatar for JohnTitor
JohnTitor
7 years ago
Seems a bit late for you. This one has her fangs sunk deep in you and your wallet. But a minor silver lining is that you'll have spank bank after she's bored with you & moved on.
avatar for TippingDollars
TippingDollars
7 years ago
This is why you should only text this bitch and tell her not to text you back unless its a reply to your text.
avatar for san_jose_guy
san_jose_guy
7 years ago
Dirk, if you like the girl, don't go to her club, try to set up OTC with her. Home OTC best because then if she stands you up you are not out any real time or money. Maybe she could even be persuaded to leave the club early.

Seeing a girl repeatedly in her strip club is what makes one a PL.

SJG

And here now, a Lifeboat Forum, in case there are ever any temporary TUSCL outages. Go ahead and register now. At least keep the URL some place safe.

But warning, if there are troll posts, I can't be spending time dealing with that, so that member will be subjected to moderation if not a complete post prohibition. It is mostly for if there are any problems with TUSCL, to keep the community together. But people do have to limit their talk to the rules of the host, much different than the rules of TUSCL.

http://testosteronelifeboat.freeforums.n…

Art of the Pimp, by Dennis Hof
https://www.amazon.com/Art-Pimp-Search-D…

I don't think much of Hof, and you know his title is a play on DJT's book.

Nevertheless, I would probably enjoy reading this, just to try and understand him and where he is coming from. One thing Hof has said is that he "only dates prostitutes". That I have definitely come to understand.

Led Zeppelin, full concert, I believe Earl's Court. Awesome.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NfwZfGAK…
part 2
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ba-LngVj…

Do you like the blues influenced Led Zeppelin with its strong bass, or do you go with the progressive rock which though seemingly blues derived has lost the strong bass? I go with the former. No reason to give up the strong bottom end.
avatar for theDirkDiggler
theDirkDiggler
7 years ago
I guess thanks for all your unsolicited advice and answers to unasked questions (some of you anyway); i'm sure yall are well intended. I do already have an idea of how to proceed from here, even if it might be predictable, not to sound like i'm complaining or anything...

Oh yeah, there are 3(!) new articles posted, including one from yours truly. All 3 articles seem to discuss being in too deep with one stripper, lol.
avatar for Cashman1234
Cashman1234
7 years ago
To answer your question about being wrapped around a dancers finger - no, I’m not in that situation. I’ve had several faves over the years - but only one that I did really stupid things for. Since I’m currently without a fave/atf/ds I’m not spending that much money on a regular basis.

It can be fun to be very into a hot stripper. It’s fine that you’ve not played it as cool as you could have. In a way I envy you in a way - as I might be too jaded to get so enamoured with a dancer. Enjoy it as much as you can - without draining too much from your wallet.
avatar for Bj99
Bj99
7 years ago
I kinda hate articles.
avatar for theDirkDiggler
theDirkDiggler
7 years ago
^ Hey, it gives me VIP access to reviews without having to spend time and money to review a mediocre new or old club. I guess i could do another comprehensive review of one of my frequently visited clubs, but unless the club has made significant changes (two of them have, although one was an owner change so it's not even the same club anymore), or my last review of the club is more than a few pages down in the club reviews (not), i'll usually pass.
avatar for Cowboy12
Cowboy12
7 years ago
I first started to make regular club visits 12 years ago.
When my favorite at the time would call and say that she "really wanted to see me", I would fall for it almost every time.
Then one time she called me and asked for a $600 loan to help pay her rent.
I never talked to her again.
It was a wake up call for me that while this is a fun time for me, it is only all about the money for them.
Right now only my CF has my number, and she just let's me know her schedule, no begging for me to show up. I don't plan on giving up my number to another dancer, although a few new girls have given me their number.
avatar for rh48hr
rh48hr
7 years ago
I have never received a text for that. My fave and my old ATF was strictly a contact them to see if they were working type deal.

I'm actually quite happy about that.
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
7 years ago
DD posted: "I guess thanks for all your unsolicited advice and answers to unasked questions (some of you anyway); i'm sure yall are well intended. I do already have an idea of how to proceed from here, even if it might be predictable, not to sound like i'm complaining or anything."

Of course you received unsolicited comment - that's what happens when you post on an open forum, so stop the fucking whining already. Maybe if you found you other ball sack you wouldn't be in this ridiculous predicament right now.

And of course she deems "different and "special" because that's what the best hustlers do. The truth of the matter is that her life is likely as fucked up as anyone else's, but she is smart enough to know that presenting herself a certain way plays to certain types of guys. It is all part of the game young buck. She is in the back room cleaning her pussy with baby wipes and putting on deodorant like all the rest, yet she knows that certain guys gravitate to a particular type of story.

Time to grow up dude and realize where you are. We've all been there and maybe you need your moments to figure it all out, but trust me when I say it is just a higher end hustle. She doesn't love you and she sure as fuck won't be having your kids, so you are wasting your time and emotional energy on a stripper you dumb fuck.

Glad I could help. ;)
avatar for theDirkDiggler
theDirkDiggler
7 years ago
^ I'm just amused by all the people that supposedly know more about this specific situation and dancer than i do. I think i'm self-aware enough to know where i stand with my ATF and have no delusions of grandeur. I like what i have right now with her as i'm more than willing to pay for it. Being able to afford it is a different story...

Thanks for the cheese!
avatar for Call.Me.Ishmael
Call.Me.Ishmael
7 years ago
"I guess thanks for all your unsolicited advice and answers to unasked questions"

Except that it was solicited. You posted a topic in a discussion forum. Discussion happened.

On the PL spectrum, this isn't bad at all. But if you start consistently spending money you don't have, then that's a whole other thing.
avatar for theDirkDiggler
theDirkDiggler
7 years ago
^ The last thing i want to do is argue on the internet, but my OP first offered a couple questions than my personal answer to the question like i do with most of my discussions with an off comment about probably spending more than i should. That's all. The first few comments were typical and expected. Then i engaged in some banter with another TUSCLer or two about more details about my specific situation and that is when suggestions and later outright assumptions were made. I tried clarifying some of them and then tried to steer the discussion multiple times to the OP with no avail. Oh well, such is life on TUSCL...
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