Old school
AbbieNormal
Maryland
So I can't sleep. Long week to catch up, but I did have an interesting visit to a club after I went into work Saturday. An ATF was dancing, haven't seen her for about a year or so, we talked and remenisced (SP?) about old times. Even though she is only 25 and has only danced for 5 years we agreed the buisness has changed. I think, and she agreed that talent is no longer a requirement. Girls used to know how to dance and move, this is music independant, even with the rap shit they can't stay in time now. Apparently it doesn't matter. Having a conversation with this ATF suddenly highlited what pale immitations all the other girls were. They can't dance, they can't talk, they can't connect. I had the best 3 hours in a club i've had in probably 2 years because I re-connected with a good dancer. It just highlited to me how impoverished the biz is lately. Can't say I blame FONDL for not going for a year. After today I wonder what the hell I was bothering for, for the most part.
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26 comments
My own personal problem is that I so enjoyed spending time with ATF (still do but she quit dancing 8 years ago) that every club visit since then has been disappointing. Combine that with how expensive the hobby has become and it just isn't worth it to me anymore. I'm sure I'll drop by a club again one of these days when it's convenient to do so, but I won't spend very much and I'll probably be disappointed. It's true - you can't go home again, it isn't there anymore.
Maybe DC has the right idea, the clubs there are still what they used to be like elsewhere before LDs took over. Sit, drink, watch and talk, but don't touch. (I once saw a customer get throuwn out of a DC club because he brushed the leg of a dancer on stage with the end of a dollar bill that he was waiting to give her.)
Clubber, in a lot of beauty parlors, gyms etc. that offer massage as a sideline, the massage therapist is an independent who rents the space and runs her own business. A lot of these girls will also make house calls if you don't mind paying a small additional travel fee. My ATF rents a small room in a beauty parlor and also does house calls. You can also find therapists in the Yellow Pages or on the Internet. My Yellow Pages has two categories for massage - therapeutic and relaxation, the latter are all escort services.
Just don't ever ask a licensed massage therapist if she does anything extra - the vast majority don't (they can lose their license) and will be highly offended. If they want to offer something extra, which is very unlikely, they'll let you know without you asking.
Thanks. I was speaking of legitimate massage, but I didn't know there were those that had their own studios or come to your home. I'm not saying a nude, "happy" one wouldn't be enjoyed, but the other sounds very nice as well.
I also do not find clubs as much fun as I used to. I don't feel the mileage is any less ('cept for clubs like in SB, where the ordinances have clamped down on the fun). I don't feel the girls are any less attractive, or less talented. Actually, I don't feel anything has really changed.
What I think has taken place is a mental change. It's kind of like doing drugs. You start with the light stuff and pretty soon that just doesn't give you the thrill any more, so then you find something a little stronger and that's great for a while, until that no longer does the trick, so you search out the next drug of choice...
When I first started clubbing, it was exciting just to walk in the door of a club and see hot girls. Pretty soon, that got old, and I got braver and started rail tipping. At some point, that no longer tickled my fancy, so I began getting dances.... then extras... At some point, even that didn't seem enough, so I sampled escorts, which quickly left me wanting more. The next progression was OTCing.
So, I don't think the clubs are going downhill, so much as we are setting our expectations higher. This being driven by the ever growing need for newer and hotter experiences just please us.
FYI, the term "massage" is used in two different contexts: (1) legitimate massage, which is bodywork performed by licensed massage therapists who go to school and then get jobs at beauty parlors, health spas, gyms, chiropractors' offices, or work independently; and (2) erotic massage, sometimes called "bodyrub," done by girls who have no formal training and often perform in the nude and give happy endings. These are pretty distinct differences but there can be some grey area between them depending on where you are. For example, there are some modalities (types of massage) that are sometimes performed in the nude, especially on the West Coast. And some licensed therapists do give erotic massages to make more money, although it's not all that common. Only about half the states license massage therapists, so things can be a bit looser in states that don't have licensing. Do some research on the Internet and you should be able to find what you want.
Personally I prefer legitimate massage, I want a massage by someone who has been trained plus it's a whole lot cheaper than erotic massage. But even within the legitimate category there can be significant differences from one therapist to another - it's all about finding one you like, much like trying to find a stripper you like.
I DO mean one I don't risk arrest.
I, too, consider myself "old school", and visit clubs much less than in the past. My question to you, how does one locate a parlor to visit? And I don't mean one that I risk arrest.
1) In the past I used to go to clubs a lot more. I slowed down because I wasn't enjoying it as much
2) I enjoy my visits much less now than I used to mostly because I can't seem to find a good regular dancer, not through lack of trying.
3) My former and now present ATF was up against many of the regular girls I've seen in my more recent visits, there was no comparrison. Her dancing, looks, personality, and ability to connect with the customers blew the other girls away. She used to be only slightly above average in my estimation, only one of several favorites I had at that time, though in fairness she'd make the top 10 easy...possibly the top 5.
The other mitigating factor is that I raised the topic, she didn't. I know this can be a case of a stripper telling you what you want to hear, but we'd been friendly enough as regulars she wouldn't feel the need to do so. The reason the topic was on my mind was something I saw on a recent visit that I recounted in another thread, which I don't feel like looking for now. The gist was that I saw a veteran dancer who used to be a favorite work for the first time in a long time. She took the time and knew how to entertain a group of guys that all the other girls had given up on as cheap and not tippers, but she managed to get them in a party mood and tipping. Everybody won. She made money, they had fun. None of the other dancers could seem to be bothered to make the effort.
Maybe it's just that the girls that last more than a few years are always going to learn skills and be better looking, but I don't think so. I think the standards are going down as is the talent.
I'd also say the looks have gone down hill, seeing my ATF reminded me how absolutely stunning some of the girls were when I first met her as we rattled off names of dancers we both used to like. There are very few I can think of now who match them in looks and none can move like a few of them did, or at least they don't bother.
The other part of the buisness that she said has changed is the crowds. She was working a Saturday dayshift basically because she can't stand the weekend night crowds anymore. Too rude, loud and cheap according to her, but then I've always thought that to be the case.
That said, I believe that there has been a sharp decline in good looking dancers over the past 5-8 years, as clubs have let anybody who pays her fees get onstage. As the quality has been diluted, a jackpot mentality from both dancers and customers has coarsened the tone and the whole climate of relations. So, I suppose it's possible that dancing has seen a decline a result without my noticing in the whole scheme of things, or caring.
Maybe I am weird in that aspect, but, one of the reasons I don't get a private dance right off is because I want to watch how a dancer works it...
My definition of good stage dancing is a girl who can move gracefully and keep time to the music, which admittedly is tough to do to some of the crap that passes for "music" these days, which may be part of the problem. I don't care much for the choreographed show either, or the stage gymnastics that some girls do. I agree that some of this is viewing the past through rose-colored glasses - I'm probably guilty of that - but I do think the percentage of dancers who can move gracefully has declined.
Interesting discussion nonetheless.