How do yoy Cover up the Stripper Smell?

avatar for LDJunkie
LDJunkie
Enjoying lap dances for 15 years and counting...
After receiving the lap dance, for those of us that are married or have a SO at home, how do you cover up the stripper/strip club smell? I always try to have extra clothe in the car so about 50% of the time i change my clothe at the office prior to my sc visit. But when i dont have the new clothes and still feel the urge to get a lap dance, i go to a convenience store and buy some wipes......but im not sure it gets rid of the smell.

I have even thought about renting a hotel room just to take a shower but it takes an extra hour of my time to do that.

How do you cover up the smell?

40 comments

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avatar for Cashman1234
Cashman1234
7 years ago
I don't have to cover it up. But I used to bring a change of clothes and wipes. The clubs in my area are now non-smoking which helps to limit smelling like an ash tray - but the stripper cologne/body spray smell can be difficult to remove from any garment.
avatar for Doces300
Doces300
7 years ago
I agree with Cashman, I bring a change of clothes and change before returning home. I then mix those clothes with some other laundry and help my wife out by washing a load. It's a win win as I get points for helping around the house.
avatar for BurlingtonHoFactory
BurlingtonHoFactory
7 years ago
The perfume doesn't bother me but the makeup stains are a bitch. These girls put concealer on their asses! I'm single but I still don't want makeup staining everything I own. I carry a container of Purell unscented sanitizing wipes in my car when I go to clubs. They work for getting makeup off your face, arms, and neck, so that you don't get any on your clothes or on the interior of your car.
avatar for MULANEY
MULANEY
7 years ago
Weird. I haven't been mongering for so long (4 years) but have had my fair share of experiences and NOT ONCE have i noticed a smell, makeup etc.

I DO douse myself with TONS of purell after but that's for germs not smell. Once my jimmy stops burning from all the purell i then look for period blood on my clothes but that's just because of that scene in superbad that created that fear.
avatar for houjack
houjack
7 years ago
I have that febreeze air freshener can that you spray. I have it in the car "in case of smells." I smell like that freshener on a regular basis whether I club or not. After club I give myself and inside car a spray.

Also, I ALWAYS have a change of clothes for clubbing. I am an LDK man after all. No way am I gonna make a mess and return home with stains on the clothes I'm wearing. Right now I have two sets of club clothes. I wash once a week so usually no problem. On the rare week when I go twice AND unable to sneak clothes in and do laundry, I'm contemplating a purchase on an emergency third set, hahaha.
avatar for SirLapdancealot
SirLapdancealot
7 years ago
I have at least one pair of clubbing pants, underwear, and shirt that are always in a gym bag in my car. I change into it all before I go, and then as I head home I stop and change back to whatever I was wearing before. I will also wash my hands and face at a bathroom as I change back.

At the moment I am lucky that my ATF DS just wears a light amount of perfume and facial makeup only. I've had strippers that wore glitter, heavy makeup, and a lot of perfume that are hard to wash off. My wife has given me the "stink eye" from smelling perfume on me more than once over the years. Luckily she didn't press the issue.
avatar for Jascoi
Jascoi
7 years ago
man. another reason to be seperated/divorced. :)
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
7 years ago
If you are married and have an SO, and you don't at least have a change of clothes (how hard is it to keep a gym bag with spare regular clothes under some gym clothes?), I think you most likely secretly want to get caught ... since 1. just because you don't smell it on you, doesn't mean you don't stink like floozy, you will be completely noseblind by the time you leave the club, and 2. fragrance sticks to clothes, to the point that it sometimes survives a trip through the washer. So, this is easy: if the stripper was wearing body spray or perfume that you can smell, and she gave you a lapdance, your clothes ABSOLUTELY smell like her whether you can smell it or not, the other question is how close your nose has to be to detect it, and how quickly it will dissipate (super cheap body sprays dissipate faster)

Absolutely minimum standard if you have a relationship at stake:
1. Changes clothes
2. Wipe down with babywipes or soap and water at a local restroom
avatar for MULANEY
MULANEY
7 years ago
@Subraman never thought about it that way. Always figured i had a keen sense of smell and couldnt smell anything so it wasnt there. The solution of keeping a spair change of clothes: What do you do when you get home and your SO asks why you changed clothes from when you left the house? In my mind id rather slink in with same clothes and pray she doesnt smell it than to come in with a completely different set of clothing on and have to answer those questions.
avatar for SirLapdancealot
SirLapdancealot
7 years ago
Also be aware that *some* women have a heightened sense of smell either during her period or just before. My wife already can smell things much better than I can, and during her period it goes to another level.
avatar for Jasdoit
Jasdoit
7 years ago
Might be a good idea to get a membership at a 24 fitness club for the showers.
avatar for Cashman1234
Cashman1234
7 years ago
@mulaney - you keep a change of clothes in your car - and you wear the change of clothes to the club. You change back into the clothes (you left your wife wearing) before you come home. You use the wipes on your face, hands, etc. to remove the strip club smell from your body.
avatar for SirLapdancealot
SirLapdancealot
7 years ago
In a pinch you get gas on the way home and *accidentally* spill a little on yourself. This makes you an extra special kind of PL, though.
avatar for Cashman1234
Cashman1234
7 years ago
^ a special - and flammable - PL!

When I was married - I was coming home with a buddy - and I realized that I had the stripper perfume stink. I tried running a lit match over my clothes to help. It worked in a different way than I expected - as my shirt caught fire. It did mask the stripper smell - lol!
avatar for Call.Me.Ishmael
Call.Me.Ishmael
7 years ago
Was going to make Jasdoit's suggestion.

Alternately, pet a skunk.
avatar for Warrenboy75
Warrenboy75
7 years ago
It's not the smell but the make-up that will get you in the end..........
avatar for Cashman1234
Cashman1234
7 years ago
What used to get me was the glitter. That got on everything - and I could never get it off of my clothes - and out of my car. Now - I'm no longer concerned about smells or glitter!
avatar for Doces300
Doces300
7 years ago
Whore-B-Gone
avatar for Call.Me.Ishmael
Call.Me.Ishmael
7 years ago
"Whore-B-Gone"

AKA running out of money.
avatar for Dominic77
Dominic77
7 years ago
I strip down and soak my clubbing clothes in a wash tub.

Then I shower like a hazmat scrub.

Works for me!
avatar for Huntsman
Huntsman
7 years ago
The spilled gas and lit match solution reminds me of Zoolander. But it would get rid of the club smell.
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
7 years ago
MULANEY-->"@Subraman never thought about it that way. Always figured i had a keen sense of smell and couldnt smell anything so it wasnt there."

I'd be super cautious ... There's a reason most people can't tell whether their houses smell, but you can smell their family smell the moment you walk in. They're practically physically incapable of smelling it -- your brain shuts it off. People who love cologne and perfume go through all sorts of gyrations to wear their fragrance in such a way that they can continue to smell it as the day goes on!

-->"The solution of keeping a spair change of clothes: What do you do when you get home and your SO asks why you changed clothes from when you left the house?"

I have two solutions to that! First, I commonly left the house, went to work, changed out of my work clothes into my clubbing clothes, went to the club, changed back into work clothes on the way home. Leave the house and come home in exactly the same clothes.

If I did go clubbing in the clothes I left the house in, like I said I kept my gym clothes and spare clothes in my gym bag. My standard story was: went to the gym, worked out, showered, didn't want to change back into my nice work clothes so changed into my hanging out shirt and jeans... which are in my gym bag.

I don't think any of this ever raised the tiniest bit of suspicion... certainly not as much as smelling like Victoria Secret Vanilla Fantasy might have
avatar for BurlingtonHoFactory
BurlingtonHoFactory
7 years ago
There's some funny shit in this thread! Thank goodness I'm single. Will remain so until one of these whores traps me with a pregnancy scam LOL.
avatar for san_jose_guy
san_jose_guy
7 years ago
How do you cover up the smell? I guess we could ask all the process servers that handle divorce cases to offer some wipes before they serve you.

SJG
avatar for Jackmd
Jackmd
7 years ago
Smoke cigars. This also throws birddog LE's that want to know if you've been drinking off the trail.
avatar for goosman
goosman
7 years ago
I would suggest "accidentally" spilling coffee on one's self. Less dangerous than gas & also more plausible.
avatar for Clubber
Clubber
7 years ago
Personally, never had to deal with it. In my work I traveled often, locally, to many different businesses. There were usually a lot of lovelies around. That said, I would often smell like their perfume and such. I guess the SO never thought it was anything else.
avatar for Bj99
Bj99
7 years ago
If you have to shower, it would make more sense to get a plant fitness membership for 10/ month. You could come home in your gym clothes that way too. Your office clothes will still smell like stripper, so be sure to toss them in the wash as soon as you get home. You might want to take up doing laundry, so it not weird ;)
avatar for ButterMan
ButterMan
7 years ago
I don't have to hide and i like a good smelling stripper, but if I did i'd probably use frebreze.
avatar for Bj99
Bj99
7 years ago
^ that would be a great frebreze commercial.
avatar for Dominic77
Dominic77
7 years ago
Q: "How do yoy Cover up the Stripper Smell?"
A: You have to dig a hole at least six feet.

just kidding.

Though, why not just come clean and tell the wife you go to titty bars, deal with it woman, and shower at home like man?
avatar for Ch3ll
Ch3ll
7 years ago
I don't have a significant other, but there have been times I wanted to go somewhere else and either smelled or had makeup stains on my khakis crotch, which makes it obvious. So as you mentioned a change of clothes is your best bet and a wash of the face. I've had makeup smear there too.

If your spouse doesn't know your entire wardrobe collection, keep three outfits tucked in the trunk with a catch all pair of shoes. I should take my own advice and maybe then I won't be disappointed when I have makeup on the crotch of my pants.
avatar for Cashman1234
Cashman1234
7 years ago
My current challenge isn't covering up the smell for the wife (since I'm divorced), but to try and keep the smell from lingering in my car. I guess - I should drive home with the windows open.
avatar for flagooner
flagooner
7 years ago
^ a cup with some hazelnut coffee does wonders to help with the smell.

Also those green pine tree deodorizer are very potent.
Plus using one reminds me of the movie Repo Man (one of the best soundtracks of all time).
avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive
7 years ago
I like my cigars so I usually don’t carry stripper scent
avatar for Cashman1234
Cashman1234
7 years ago
^ Thanks. That will work. I'm sure it will get the lingering odor out.
avatar for Uprightcitizen
Uprightcitizen
7 years ago
I have a membership to a 24x7 gym and have stopped there to shower off after when its bad or I just want to quickly clean up after a bit of a mess. I also have back up clothes in a gym bag I keep in the car. I usually dont have to use either option but they are there if I need it.
avatar for Uprightcitizen
Uprightcitizen
7 years ago
...oh and I keep some sanitary wipes in my car. Those are very handy for reducing stripper smell and of course for antibacterial clean up.
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