Please inform of my untimely demise

avatar for Subraman
Subraman
Car key and wallet dating your sister
From SamPepys discussion of ATF's OTC handicapping:
-->"She told me she has even told family how to inform me if something does happen to her."

So, any PLs have such orders in place? I will admit I have, a few times. For the most part, "inform my ATF of my death" (and btw, I have direct instructions in my will that, no matter how I go, tuscl should be on the suspect list) are not necessary because:

1. If she's working at my fave clubs, my buddies will be back there and know to tell Misty of my suspicious death at the hands of the shadowy organization known as tuscl
2. Most of my CFs and ATFs probably don't much care that I'm dead, anyway, except inasmuch as they now have time for a new less-entitled regular

But a few times, I've been in a position where neither 1 nor 2 applied... times when the relationship had turned more like arrangement-lite or even FWB, she wasn't working at the club anymore, no direct connection to any of my social circle (many times these girls know my friends and have partied with them, but don't have phone numbers or emails). In short, a relationship where each of us is expected not to just ghost on the other. As an example, take my 5-year relationship with my (basically long-retired) ATATF, I don't even know how to describe it, maybe "arrangement-lite masquerading as FWB"; I know and am connected with her family and friends, but the reverse is not true, she has no way to interact with my family or friends. So, my best buddy has "here's how to contact her, let her know if juice finally hunts me down and finishes me off via death-by-bunga-bunga".

14 comments

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avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive
7 years ago
I never realized what a depressing fuck you are ;)
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
7 years ago
You're not getting it, man. MY SIDE HOOCH NEEDS TO BE INFORMED OF MY DEATH. MUST!

:) :) of course. Plus, discussing this is an outlet for my fantasy regarding death by bunga bunga
avatar for Dominic77
Dominic77
7 years ago
For any x-ennials or younger in the audience, once upon a time, there existed newspapers and people would read the daily obituaries in it.
avatar for Dominic77
Dominic77
7 years ago
Anyone care to write @subraman's obit? Be be sure to add surviving children, grandchildren, CFs, ATFs, and all ATATFs. Limit 5 lines for $25.
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
7 years ago
If the words "auto-erotic asphyxiation" do not appear in that obituary, I will be disappoint.
avatar for warhawks
warhawks
7 years ago
I already know that the phrase: "Here, hold my beer" will be somewhere in my final words...
avatar for jackslash
jackslash
7 years ago
My stripper friends will know of my death because they will probably cause it.
avatar for l00ber
l00ber
7 years ago
I should probably setup some sort of notification tree in the event of my passing. The ladies in my life should know that they need to get a fucking job now.
avatar for shailynn
shailynn
7 years ago
Ugh I had a coworker once. Ugliest man you have ever seen but one of the best personalities of anyone I'd ever met. He was a totally pussy magnet because of that.

He drops dead and not one but two of his "girlfriends" show up to his viewing. His friends wouldn't let them in and one cause a big scene. I have never felt so bad for someone as I did for his wife that night.

That's not the way to handle it!
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
7 years ago
My ATF follows my Facebook page, so she'll know if something happens to me. I've asked her to contact a couple of other people, e.g. the MILF, in the event of my death.
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
7 years ago
^^^ My facebook and snapchat are basically honeypots, the only ones on my facebook & snapchat are other strippers. So all they can do there is ask each other "have you seen Subraman? Not me, have you seen Subraman? I have not, have you?"
avatar for gawker
gawker
7 years ago
My lawyer had my ATF's phone # and her BF's name. If I were to die, he was to notify her. She and 2 other stripper friends could come to my wake and introduce themselves as former students of mine. If I were to get beaten to death, my lawyer was to give the police the BF's name as a suspect.
If I were to die while fucking my ATF in a hotel, she was to wipe down the room and leave me for the maid. Easy Peasy.
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
7 years ago
This is the kind of end-of-life planning all PLs should be doing. Except, if I die while fucking my ATF in a hotel, I insist she stay in the room with me, so when the police and paramedics come, they're like, "whoa, he was fucking this fine chick? Savage!"
avatar for joc13
joc13
7 years ago
^^^^ so f'ing true!!!! I had wondered about setting up some type of no-ghost notification with a favorite SB of mine when I was going through some health issues. I would not have wanted her to think I just abandoned her.
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