Newbie needs help, thought it was different!
I would like to say in advance thank you for your comments and suggestions, and, will try to keep this short.
First information for context:
Me: 30, in shape, well groomed, looks fine, converses well, enough disposable income to spend
Her: 23, Hot, pretty, converses well, Hot, seems smart, and again Hot, gets attention. and single, no S/O as far as I can tell
Place: dive strip club, not fancy, caters mostly to Hispanics and African Americans but can see all crowds.
By the way I'm Caucasian she's Latina if that matters. Also she does have kids already
Situation: Started around two years ago, and in a 3 or 4 month period during that two years ago, seeing her once every week or once every other week, and would spend anywhere from 650-900 each time (lasted a few months)
It involved good dances with good mileage, everything short of any actual sexual acts, so none of that. We texted a lot and During that time I would ask her to do something (a date) and she always said yeah, but never happened (flaked). That all took place within a few months time span, two years ago.
After that few months time span a couple years ago, she actually stop dancing, and left for a little over a year. With very little contact during that time of a little over a year off.
NOW: After having not been there a over a year she returns Earlier This Year. AND here is where the newbie (me) is confused because I blew it off last time but this time it seemed different, And I will explain.
THIS TIME: So far about a two month time span going on for this time. And this time I thought she was more interested and here is why:
Yeah the money spent has been about 600-700 once a week or every other week, but the things that she is doing is what I don't get.
REASONS I THOUGHT she is interested this time.
1.)Texting a lot but much more detailed texting and personal texting, including her sending me pictures of things she might be doing (not club related).
2.) Phone conversations. Great talking, on the phone again detailed/personal.
3.) Just seems more interested in her mannerisms.....acts A LOT more interested
4.) Gave me her address to go out some time.
5.) Last two times I got a bunch of dances free, like many many dances....each time FREE
I don't get it, the free dances thing, the address thing, the detailed and personal talking on phone and texting, sending pics, the her being way more interested thing......AND YET still flaked on the most recent dates that we had planned!!!!! STILL FLAKING to go out on dates Why???????????
First information for context:
Me: 30, in shape, well groomed, looks fine, converses well, enough disposable income to spend
Her: 23, Hot, pretty, converses well, Hot, seems smart, and again Hot, gets attention. and single, no S/O as far as I can tell
Place: dive strip club, not fancy, caters mostly to Hispanics and African Americans but can see all crowds.
By the way I'm Caucasian she's Latina if that matters. Also she does have kids already
Situation: Started around two years ago, and in a 3 or 4 month period during that two years ago, seeing her once every week or once every other week, and would spend anywhere from 650-900 each time (lasted a few months)
It involved good dances with good mileage, everything short of any actual sexual acts, so none of that. We texted a lot and During that time I would ask her to do something (a date) and she always said yeah, but never happened (flaked). That all took place within a few months time span, two years ago.
After that few months time span a couple years ago, she actually stop dancing, and left for a little over a year. With very little contact during that time of a little over a year off.
NOW: After having not been there a over a year she returns Earlier This Year. AND here is where the newbie (me) is confused because I blew it off last time but this time it seemed different, And I will explain.
THIS TIME: So far about a two month time span going on for this time. And this time I thought she was more interested and here is why:
Yeah the money spent has been about 600-700 once a week or every other week, but the things that she is doing is what I don't get.
REASONS I THOUGHT she is interested this time.
1.)Texting a lot but much more detailed texting and personal texting, including her sending me pictures of things she might be doing (not club related).
2.) Phone conversations. Great talking, on the phone again detailed/personal.
3.) Just seems more interested in her mannerisms.....acts A LOT more interested
4.) Gave me her address to go out some time.
5.) Last two times I got a bunch of dances free, like many many dances....each time FREE
I don't get it, the free dances thing, the address thing, the detailed and personal talking on phone and texting, sending pics, the her being way more interested thing......AND YET still flaked on the most recent dates that we had planned!!!!! STILL FLAKING to go out on dates Why???????????
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34 comments
As part of her service, she is giving you the illusion of a girlfriend experience. You have noticed that and seem to appreciate it.
If you enjoy it and it's worth the money, keep it up. Just don't think you've found true love. Going down that path will end poorly for you.
The money you are spending puts you in mid- to high-end SD territory in most parts of the country. You could get someone who's not flaky for that kind of money.
Heh, it is CRAZY that you can't understand why! I realize that being love-drunk or lust-drunk causes you to lose perspective, but man, from the outside, it is crazy crystal clear. And this is a pretty standard pattern, I know she's making things feel super special in the club, but she's running the exact same hustle a zillion other strippers run on a zillion other customers. The short answer here is: you are exactly the type of customer strippers dream of: regularly spend ridiculous amounts of money in the club, without getting sex, gullible enough to continue to buy her excuses on why she flakes on dates, and all it's costing her to buy your loyalty is some extra texting a few extra dances. She'd be crazy to do anything else but play you the way she's playing you.
RM is exactly right that in most areas of the country, $900 per meeting puts you in ultra-desirable sugardaddy territory with some amazing beautiful women. And there you get actual sex. Or, if you move on to a different strip club, or a different girl in that same strip club, again that type of spending should get you the royal treatment on OTCs (which is what I"d recommend). But you're going to have to find a way to draw a line somewhere. See the same girl 3 (or whatever) times, she still doesn't meet you OTC? Move on, that's that.
With how much your spending each month, only a seriously lovedrunk PL would not be deliriously happy getting awesome sex from a smoking hot and charming stripper or sugar baby.
She sees a sucker (you) and she's going to lick it.
Don't be the sucker, you should be the one doing the licking.
1.) SHE invited me to a concert. (which I couldn't go because was busy)
2.) SHE initiated the going out talk, this time not me.
WHY is she initiating and flaking I understand if I am initiating and she is flaking but why SHE initiating and flaking???? what is that about????
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Unfortunately, in the bizarro world of SC's, you've been far too generous and there is pretty much zero chance it will be anything more than ITC hustle. True, eventually she would have lunch with you if you keep throwing money at her but nothing more ever.
I suspect two things here. She has some type of BF/GF. Could be a married dude or pimp. Plus, you are not being true with your intentions of wanting to fuck her instead playing her as a "friend" when she knows exactly what you want.
Here's what I recommend. Text her a very specific offer for time & hotel for sex. Offer her $1000. Sounds like you can afford it. If she turns you down (which she probably will) never spend another dollar on her. At least you will know it was never going to go anywhere. Good luck.
Sonny Corleone to Michael
If you want to have sex with her, you need to change your behavior. Stop spending time and money on her. Go to the club and spend on other dancers. When she asks you why, tell her you're looking for sex outside the club and you think other dancers will deliver. Don't accept any more excuses from her. If she does agree to go out with you, pay her a reasonable amount (say $300). If she doesn't, you will find some other stripper who will fuck you.
@bj99 haven't spent much on other dancers at all
@trucidos good points, but for some reason it is hard for me to get that shit
@jack yeah it seems like bullshit
@....... NOT being a troll
So far the farthest OTC has been walking her to her car, which again seems that doesn't mean shit
I don't want to pay for OTC I have no problem paying for stuff that is fine but not like paying just to get her out....going out and paying indirectly like taking out any girl on a date that is fine.
Step 1: Draw a big X on the nearest concrete wall
Step 2: Knock your skull against the X
Step 3: Repeat Step 2 until you realize she's just not into you, (but she is into your wallet).
Example, you work somewhere and get paid a very nice salary. The boss cares a lot about his daughter but you know he doesn't want her getting involved with anyone. The boss'es daughter keeps asking you to date her though. Do you go date her and hope nothing goes wrong? In this example you can pick up any hit girl you want. Do you still date the boss'es daughter?
Do you know how many phone #'s of strippers I have? Too many that I just Purge them out if they fizzle out after a couple weeks. Good times!