Newbie needs help, thought it was different!

She's a stripper. You are a customer. This is a business relationship. As part of her service, she is giving you the illusion of a girlfriend experience. You have noticed that and seem to appreciate it. If you enjoy it and it's worth the money, keep it up. Just don't think you've found true love. Going down that path will end poorly for you.

My answer may not help much but I think women are often inherently flaky and do inconsistent and contradictory things. Just shrug off her behavior if you feel like it is good value. Keep scheduling dates if you want... assuming it doesn't bother you to continually need back up plans.

My guess is that she had a boyfriend or husband back then and came back to dancing bc she needs money badly. It could be bc of the break up.

Did I read the post carefully enough? You're spending as much as $900 per meet with no sex involved? That's just crazy expensive. Are you really able to afford that kind of spending at age 30?

The money you are spending puts you in mid- to high-end SD territory in most parts of the country. You could get someone who's not flaky for that kind of money.

Dude, smell the coffee. She's found a sucker that she doesn't have to fuck. Why should she go out with you?

Another point, wanted to add, she is normal and grounded, she is not a mess, no stripper shit, not a mess by any means and no more problems, than a usual average individual.

--."AND YET still flaked on the most recent dates that we had planned!!!!! STILL FLAKING to go out on dates Why???????????"

Heh, it is CRAZY that you can't understand why! I realize that being love-drunk or lust-drunk causes you to lose perspective, but man, from the outside, it is crazy crystal clear. And this is a pretty standard pattern, I know she's making things feel super special in the club, but she's running the exact same hustle a zillion other strippers run on a zillion other customers. The short answer here is: you are exactly the type of customer strippers dream of: regularly spend ridiculous amounts of money in the club, without getting sex, gullible enough to continue to buy her excuses on why she flakes on dates, and all it's costing her to buy your loyalty is some extra texting a few extra dances. She'd be crazy to do anything else but play you the way she's playing you.

RM is exactly right that in most areas of the country, $900 per meeting puts you in ultra-desirable sugardaddy territory with some amazing beautiful women. And there you get actual sex. Or, if you move on to a different strip club, or a different girl in that same strip club, again that type of spending should get you the royal treatment on OTCs (which is what I"d recommend). But you're going to have to find a way to draw a line somewhere. See the same girl 3 (or whatever) times, she still doesn't meet you OTC? Move on, that's that.

With how much your spending each month, only a seriously lovedrunk PL would not be deliriously happy getting awesome sex from a smoking hot and charming stripper or sugar baby.

$900 a week and 30? Cmon you expect us to believe that? Do you live with your mom and have no bills?

She sees a sucker (you) and she's going to lick it.

Don't be the sucker, you should be the one doing the licking.

So, she is normal and grounded. Just like any grade school teacher or nurse. Plus, she gives strangers hand jobs inside a dive club. Except when she disappears for a year without any explanation. Doesn't get any more normal and boring than that.

She does not give extras like that. And that money is per visit not per week, but yeah that is the disposable income

I am not bullshitting on the money part, but it is not every single week so it's not like oh I am shelling it out weekly but it is more than others are spending yeah

What did you spend when she wasn't there? On other girls?

@Subra thanks for the response man, yeah I see your point, but she doesn't need to do all that to get me to spend some. Also forgot to say two things which I don't get: 1.) SHE invited me to a concert. (which I couldn't go because was busy) 2.) SHE initiated the going out talk, this time not me.

WHY is she initiating and flaking I understand if I am initiating and she is flaking but why SHE initiating and flaking???? what is that about????

I guess that would be a big part of what I don't get......HER initiating these things and than ignoring them or flaking on them......

I think I just found Joe__yy on the internet.

images.search.yahoo.com

I meant to put in the main post why is SHE the one initiating dates or going out?? I don't get that part of it.......that isn't much I suppose?

Does she's drink when you are together?

No idea why she does that. But right here on tuscl, I've read several TRs that are similar -- SHE suggests the OTC and then she flakes. I think the important thing to note here is: again, there's nothing special about this, it's something strippers do. In this particular case, I have no fucking idea why. But wonder if BJ99 isn't onto something with her question

I've done it. I get caught up in having fun w my customer, especially when I'm drinking, and I forget that I am a boring paranoid introvert lol.

She's now a more experienced dancer, who has added more finesse to her game. Enjoy her in the club (or not!) and don't show any interest in meeting her outside the club. Be a customer, who is entertained by a dancer (any dancer) without considering any thoughts of outside the club interaction. Good looking women get away with flaking, whether they are dancers or not! The playground they play in is much larger than an ordinary women. Mess with her a little if you want and lower your money and play time with her. Spend on other dancers (if you care to) and if she tries to act "butthurt", simply explain that it's the nice thing about a strip club - it's not monogamous relationship!

I still want to know what you spent there while she was gone?

OP: Read Trucidos posts twice. Wait three days than read them twice again. That is the truth.

Unfortunately, in the bizarro world of SC's, you've been far too generous and there is pretty much zero chance it will be anything more than ITC hustle. True, eventually she would have lunch with you if you keep throwing money at her but nothing more ever.

I suspect two things here. She has some type of BF/GF. Could be a married dude or pimp. Plus, you are not being true with your intentions of wanting to fuck her instead playing her as a "friend" when she knows exactly what you want.

Here's what I recommend. Text her a very specific offer for time & hotel for sex. Offer her $1000. Sounds like you can afford it. If she turns you down (which she probably will) never spend another dollar on her. At least you will know it was never going to go anywhere. Good luck.

Is this a Larry Fisherman troll?

If so you need to cum in for confession. We will have your head bobbing

"This is business and you are taking it very, very personal" Sonny Corleone to Michael

She's playing you like a violin. I'm not putting you down. I've been played lots of times by strippers.

If you want to have sex with her, you need to change your behavior. Stop spending time and money on her. Go to the club and spend on other dancers. When she asks you why, tell her you're looking for sex outside the club and you think other dancers will deliver. Don't accept any more excuses from her. If she does agree to go out with you, pay her a reasonable amount (say $300). If she doesn't, you will find some other stripper who will fuck you.

Jesus, how do you get "one-itis" from a stripper? You go to a strip club to escape "relationships" and all that female-oriented bullshit and to focus on what you, as a red-blooded man, should care about: SEX SEX SEX all the time.

@Subra more good points thanks.

@bj99 haven't spent much on other dancers at all

@trucidos good points, but for some reason it is hard for me to get that shit

@jack yeah it seems like bullshit

@....... NOT being a troll

So far the farthest OTC has been walking her to her car, which again seems that doesn't mean shit

I don't want to pay for OTC I have no problem paying for stuff that is fine but not like paying just to get her out....going out and paying indirectly like taking out any girl on a date that is fine.

Are you being honest ab just wanting to date her? She doesn't have romantic feelings for you, but you are giving her so much money that she'd be a moron to walk away from that, at least itc. She's prolly actually a decent percent and so isn't stringing you along outside, in the real world.

Person

Joe_yy, you are a dumb fuck. That's all I can say right now. Here are your instructions to rid yourself of the stupidity disease.

Step 1: Draw a big X on the nearest concrete wall Step 2: Knock your skull against the X Step 3: Repeat Step 2 until you realize she's just not into you, (but she is into your wallet).

My dear friend she's fuckin playing you. There is no reason or explanation she ran a game on you. Play Action fuckin pass and it's a TD Everytime. Completely cut ties with her Period! The money you're blowing is insane. There's no way I'm spending more than $200 and not fuckin let alone the cash you're blowing. Everyone gets played don't be embarrassed or upset but this shit is absurd my friend. Stop driving yourself crazy

If you are the dancers number one source of monthly income, no way does she want to date you and screw that all up.

Example, you work somewhere and get paid a very nice salary. The boss cares a lot about his daughter but you know he doesn't want her getting involved with anyone. The boss'es daughter keeps asking you to date her though. Do you go date her and hope nothing goes wrong? In this example you can pick up any hit girl you want. Do you still date the boss'es daughter?

I've been with many a stripper who behaves like Bj99 does in her comments. I'm glad to have someone like her confirm what I've experienced. Heck, she may even a he, meaning a PL in disguise as a hot stripper on tuscl. We PLs have fallen for many strippers who make us feel like we have a physical connection and this could lead to something outside the club.

Do you know how many phone #'s of strippers I have? Too many that I just Purge them out if they fizzle out after a couple weeks. Good times!