Is Dad Detachment a Development Factor for Stippers?

26 comments

• warhawks

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  7 years ago

  I can only speak from my experience.
  
  My ATF had daddy issues. So I believe it in her case.
  
  But most strippers I've met have not talked to me about their parents or any ongoing issues with their family.
• RandomMember

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  7 years ago

  I can think of one stripper I knew pretty well where her father was an alcoholic. Another more recent case where she complained that she was constantly fighting with her dad. Study sounds believable.
• Warrenboy75

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  7 years ago

  Two and Half Men made a show and a character that thrived on understanding strippers daddy issues. Hell yes, it is at the heart of their thinking process. It impacts them, even those that deny they have them, even the girls that do not recognize they have them.
• Subraman

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  7 years ago

  Hmmm, I find the bad dad/stripper connection so strong and universal that I'm almost surprised there's any question! Then again, I guess back when I was more of a variety guy, this wasn't a topic I ever discussed or was aware of. But as a CF guy for many years, we get to know each other pretty well, and I usually eventually hear the tragic family stories. I have seen over the years other studies showing the critical importance of good fathers to girls as they grow up.
  
  Anyone, obviously this is just anecdotal, but the stereotype of many strippers having bad dads is, IME, based soundly on reality.
• bubba267

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  7 years ago

  There is a strong link. Then there is the other side of the coin...the preacher's daughter who can be just as wild.
• Bj99

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  7 years ago

  I don't partake in risky sex, but I dont know if simply being a stripper would also bc of the sexuality of the job. I personally have found that part to just be more honest than normal life.
  
  And then, I don't know what's more screwed up mentally, the girls who engage in sexually risky behavior, or the wives who decide they don't like sex, and ruin their relationship w their husband by only screwing him (grudgingly) twice a year. I kinda think we all have some issue, or another, w our parents; it's a girl thing.
• anonlvone

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  7 years ago

  I hope no one received funding for that study, because this isn't exactly ground breaking science. I can attest from personal experience that more than 30 years ago books were being written based on studies which had already been done showing the same thing. Absent fathers, abusive fathers, are strongly correlated to lesbian daughters, risk-taking daughters, etc. I can also attest from personal experience that pretty much every stripper I've ever gotten to know well had a messed up relationship with her father.
• tumblingdice

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  7 years ago

  I dated a stripper for three years and not a once did she engage her father on the phone.As a matter of fact she would send M/F day cards a day after.She tried to substanciate her worth with an online creative writing degree which is funny I came across her resume and it should have been written in crayon.She lacked all common sense.My days are now filled with bankers,businessmen and politcians and there was just no room for her anymore but god she just didn't get the hint.
• wallanon

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  7 years ago

  If observations TUSCLers typically share about our experiences as customers would qualify as research, it'd fall under ethnographic research. Ethnography is considered more to be a sociological approach rather than psychological method. For those who don't have full text access to WSJ, there is another summary of the journal paper at http://neurosciencenews.com/dad-sister-p….
  
  Journal Paper Details
  
  "Impact of Fathers on Parental Monitoring of Daughters and Their Affiliation With Sexually Promiscuous Peers: A Genetically and Environmentally Controlled Sibling Study." DelPriore, Danielle J.; Schlomer, Gabriel L.; Ellis, Bruce J. Developmental Psychology, May 08 , 2017
  
  Paper Abstract
  
  Girls who receive higher quality fathering engage in less risky sexual behavior (RSB) than their peers. Previous research identifies higher levels of parental monitoring/knowledge and reduced affiliation with deviant peers as potential mediators of this observed fathering effect. Although paternal investment theory posits a causal effect of fathers on daughters’ RSB, and on the intervening processes that mediate this effect, these relations could arise from genetic or environmental confounds. To address this limitation, we employed the genetically- and environmentally controlled differential sibling-exposure design (N = 101 sister pairs; ages 18–36), which retrospectively examines the effects of differential sibling exposure to family disruption/father absence and quality of fathering. Consistent with a causal explanation, differences between older and younger sisters in the effects of fathering quality on parental monitoring and peer RSB were greatest in biologically disrupted families when there was a large age gap between the sisters (thus maximizing differential exposure to fathers), with greater exposure within families to higher quality fathering increasing parental monitoring and reducing affiliation with sexually promiscuous peers. No such differences were found between older and younger sisters in families with little or no differential exposure to fathers (e.g., biologically intact families) or in response to differences in mothering quality. Taken together, these findings suggest that higher quality fathering may decrease daughters’ engagement in RSB by increasing the amount of parental monitoring that they receive and decreasing their affiliation with peers who promote RSB.
  
  
  
  
• anonlvone

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  7 years ago

  From my reading this paper doesn't really address the fundamental issue. I'm sure the father preacher referenced above by bubba would be only too happy to engage in "parental monitoring." The situation which is not being addressed by this paper, the situation with which most every TUSCL member seems to be familiar, isn't one where the father is a shielding influence from some harmful factor, but rather where the father himself is the harmful factor. This seems like a huge waste of time and effort, which of course is exactly what I would expect from an academic.
• HungryGiraffe

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  7 years ago

  Thanks wallanonn for adding the abstract.
  
  IME, nearly all strippers I've gotten to know had daddy issues. In all cases, there wasn't a father in the picture interested in investing in them, particularly their college education. They strip because they need money for a range of responsibilities or personal develop goals.
  
  I've also been surprised to meet what seems a surprisingly high number of strippers who never knew their biological dads due to adoption or Mom not knowing who their dad was.
• Subraman

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  7 years ago

  Love and cherish your daughters, treat them with respect, build their self-esteem, show by example how to make good choices. Or risk running into them at The Hotsie House one day.
• johndough20020

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  7 years ago

  I have seen quite a few stripper social media pages and some of them are daddy's girls. In fact I have even gotten a little jealous because it appeared that some of them had better upbringings than me.
  
  I have seen fathers drive theirs daughters to the club. I have also seen fathers accompany their daughters during additions.
  
  As far as numbers/percentages of involved fathers, I have no idea because some stripper social pages indicate a rough childhood.
• Subraman

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  7 years ago

  John, interesting point, but I'd just caution two things:
  
  -->"I have seen quite a few stripper social media pages and some of them are daddy's girls."
  
  Social media in general, and especially strippers' social media, is often used to construct an elaborate fiction of a wonderful life and wonderful relationships. Talking 1-on-1 often reveals a different story, and I believe that one-on-one is always more reflective of reality than the tapestry she weaves on her social media.
  
  -->"I have seen fathers drive theirs daughters to the club. I have also seen fathers accompany their daughters during additions."
  
  I have to admit, my first thought is "those are bad fathers, their relationship has gone astray for that to be happening and proves the point ". Maybe I'm being a bit closed-minded... you feel this is evidence of a good father-daughter relationship?
• Jascoi

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  7 years ago

  i have three daughters. i was gone working about 100 hours a week. as a father i was lacking. none of them ever became strippers. darn.
• Warrenboy75

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  7 years ago

  "Social media in general, and especially strippers' social media, is often used to construct an elaborate fiction of a wonderful life and wonderful relationships. Talking 1-on-1 often reveals a different story, and I believe that one-on-one is always more reflective of reality than the tapestry she weaves on her social media."
  
  Because I know a handful of girls who have turned out to be strippers and dated a couple before they were strippers I know first hand the difference between what they portray on social media and reality. In some cases it isn't even close.
  
  The reason I asked a question on here a week or so ago about how intuitive the board software is had to do with a question/situation that really hit home with me about my one ex. She paints a very perfect picture on her social media, hides from many what she is doing for money, and to the few others on a different social media venue where she interacts with other girls in the industry acts as if she is killing it...she reached out t me about a week ago.........it was painful to hear....... the truth.
• shailynn

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  7 years ago

  It's a fact. How can I be sitting there at a club (a young stud) and the old dude sitting next to me gets all the girls coming around him.
  
  I know, they think since I'm younger I'm broke.
• JohnSmith69

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  7 years ago

  Every stripper that I've known well had serious daddy issues except DS II. It's difficult to deny the obvious correlation.
• larryfisherman

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  7 years ago

  I don't know any stripper well enough to know all about their family.
• Subraman

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  7 years ago

  Of course, if we were on StripperWeb, the girls would point out -- perhaps with good reason, perhaps not -- that every one of us used the same sample of strippers: those who will fuck their customers ITC or OTC. And, they'd claim, those extras girls are the most damaged as it is, so this is a self-fulfilling prophecy... they would claim the truly-no-extras girls are more healthy in general, but that we'd have no way to know that, because those kinds of girls aren't going to let us in.
  
  I'll leave it as an exercise to the reader as to whether that might be true. I have theories, but the fact is, every girl I've gotten close enough to to know their family history, is an extras girl, even if those extras are confined to OTC
• Subraman

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  7 years ago

  Actually, I can add on a little data: I've been SCing in non-extras clubs for nearly 10 years now, and met a zillion non-extras girls. While I don't get close enough with them to talk about daddy, if she's hot and fun, she's always invited to come and drink with me, I'll hang out with her when there's no one else to pursue, etc. The one insight I do have is: as far as poor judgement, impulsiveness, living her life from crisis to crisis, etc., I can detect absolutely no difference between extras and non-extras girls, there's no way to figure out if she'll do extras until I ask. In short, I personally can't detect that extras girls are noticeably healthier mentally or emotionally than non-extras girls; I would suspect similar sorts of family histories and experiences across the board.
• Subraman

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  7 years ago

  ^^^ I meant the reverse in that last sentence: I can't detect that NON-EXTRAS girls are any healthier mentally or emotionally than extras girls. They all display exactly the same behavior, at least to me.
• Warrenboy75

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  7 years ago

  From what I have observed from the small sample size of data is the negative influence is what brings them into dancing.
  
  Where they are brought into dancing ( city, club, etc) is what determines if they move into extras and how long it takes.
  
  For instance in Detroit--at least from what I have read on here--if you are not doing extras chances are you are not going to make money as opposed say DC where unless the girl goes OTC with you there are no extras.
  
  I can say the girls I have all talked to lack impulse control--all of them which is why for the most part they have more month than money when the rent is due and crisis management or Life Coaching could make a field day just taking on strippers as clients.
  
  
• san_jose_guy

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  7 years ago

  People always say that sex workers come from abusive families. But some insightful commentators have challenged that, saying that they come from abusive families in about the same percentage as the rest of the population. Familial sexual abuse effects about 20% of the general population. What is different though about sex workers is that they have decided that they are not going to uphold the lies. So they live outside of the box, and they talk about things most would not.
  
  The best of sex workers, as you might find in say San Francisco, they are self aware and politically aware. Why should they work in Starbucks when guys keep handing them money of sex, especially when they are very happy to fuck lots of guys?
  
  They talk about sexual abuse. I have observed this first hand in our local clubs.
  
  The ones who live in self destructive ways, they lack this awareness. But at least they are not contributing to the lies which prop up the middle class family.
  
  SJG
  
  Eden Ahbez - Nature Boy
  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=339UrDjH…
  
  http://d29ci68ykuu27r.cloudfront.net/pro…
  
  Jon Hassel
  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b2COiOTn…
  
  Celine Dion, the one I like.
  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RSQyzit5…
  
  Church of Satan
  http://www.churchofsatan.com/images/lave…
  
  London's Windmill Theater
  http://www.arthurlloyd.co.uk/Archive/Feb…
  
  http://www.arthurlloyd.co.uk/Archive/Feb…
• JimGassagain

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  7 years ago

  ^^^ What lies contribute to propping up the middle class?
• san_jose_guy

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  7 years ago

  The middle class family only exists because it is allowed to exploit and abuse children. It turned children into private property.
  
  The lie is that this is somehow good and should be sentimentalized.
  
  The people I am locally trying to remove from political office are people who do this, while at the same time trying to further inflate the real estate market. I'll take strippers over them any day.
  
  SJG
  
  Knock Three Times - Tony Orlando and Dawn
  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=emvVDC1-…
  
  London's Windmill Theater
  http://www.arthurlloyd.co.uk/Archive/Feb…
  
  http://www.arthurlloyd.co.uk/Archive/Feb…
  
  Eden Ahbez - Nature Boy
  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=339UrDjH…
  
  http://d29ci68ykuu27r.cloudfront.net/pro…
  
  Jon Hassel
  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b2COiOTn…
  
  Celine Dion, the one I like.
  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RSQyzit5…
  
  Miles Davis, melody played on xylophone. Can't play the sharpened Eb and Db at all.
  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GDS_nqHa…
  
  David Bowie, can't follow it at all
  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_YtyyfU…
  
  Michael Jackson, sounds good, just like Celine Dion
  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gEI5VXyS…
  
  Etta Jones, follows it with her voice, but much less than a semi-tone drop
  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CxKaeMoD…
  
  Sarah Vaughan
  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6q2I5tQ-…
  
  Natalie Cole
  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T4wzpTNq…
  
  Ella Fitzgerald and Joe Pass
  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y-khWMLm…
  
  Frank Sinatra, 1948
  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W4NuFLWf…
  
  Church of Satan
  http://www.churchofsatan.com/images/lave…