ATF Leaving To Another State

Dman12345
Arizona
I am a big of TUSCL and its articles, I really appreciate expert advice from those are frequent SC and been through all the drama and SS, so here is my first and full story of my SC experience:

I am not what you call a seasonal SC visitor. I might visit once couple weeks or maybe sometimes only once every month or couple months. And every time I go, I only go for one reason. And that is just for fun and some physical contacts with hot females. This was all true until 6 months ago. I had some dances with this cute latina that was my type. She give me dances and VIP that was very GFE and something I never experienced. I didn't think much of this at all in the beginning. Until couple months down the line that for some reason every time I showed up at this club she was always there and I ended up getting dances from her. She is very good conservationist and we can talk forever about even the most random things. This is where everything gets interesting. It finally hits me that I realize this girl is very special to me and I have urges to want to see and talk to her more. This is the same time I noted to myself that this girl is my all time favorite. Before this, I have never meet any one even close. And I have been doing SC for 10+ years, nothing serious though. After making up my mind about wanting to see this girl more, I tried to arrange seeing her OTC or simply just trying to figure out her schedule so I can see her more in the club. But this girl is just so unpredictable, I was only able to get her text. Never heard from her over the phone. I was only able to get her out 1 out of many many times and it was just a brief dinner. As for schedules, I was only able to get her to tell me she was coming to the club only one time. And the rest, I pretty much just had to try my luck to see if I can locate her in the club. I spent really good money on her in the beginning because I go to this club seldomly, but I know my current financial status that this is not feasible for frequent visits so I did try to budget down a little so I can see her more. I guess this is around the same time where I ran into trouble. This along with me introducing one of my friend to her (he was drunk on that day and made some inappropriate comments). I think this ticked her off and somehow changed her from being super friendly to being super cold to me in the last few weeks. She also said some mean things that hurt my feelings but I somehow shrugged it off because I thought it was so ridiculous. So fast forward to now, we somehow made up and no longer mad at each other. It got emotional but at least on that day I thought we made peace with each other. And just as god would play trick on me like how I shouldn't meet this girl, she told me she is fed up with her current living and wants to move out to a different state. So here I am, went from nonchalant to excited to angry and now to sad because I will dearly miss this girl. In the last couple days, I have been trying desperately to make some OTC with her (even though I know she is just going to say yes initially but flake out in the end, that's just the way she is). But I want to at least try rather then regret later. So now only couple days before she is leaving, I am stuck in an awkward position that I never had in my life. I have deep feelings for my ATF and she is leaving. And I can't see her even though I tried everything that's within my control. So someone out there, help me out or even call me out, I know I am a big PL but I can't help feeling this way right now. I know time will heal things but for now I just feel like I am helpless.

28 comments

Latest

Papi_Chulo
7 years ago
You're fucking up.

The two most important rules of strip-clubbing are:

1) Don't fall in-love with a stripper

2) Don't forget rule #1
MrDeuce
7 years ago
Dude, many of us feel your pain -- but she's moving away and it's not meant to be!

Also, what Papi said: Don't *ever* fall in love with a stripper!

Take it from someone who knows all too well . . .
Papi_Chulo
7 years ago
Just so we're on the same page - are you wanting to see this girl OTC like a regular date or P4P?
Papi_Chulo
7 years ago
You seem to be the classic RIL (not a good thing)
warhawks
7 years ago
Be glad she is gone. Always. Always, there will be another one to take her place.

Hopefully, she didn't take you for too much money.
shadowcat
7 years ago
Road trip. :)
Dman12345
7 years ago
Papi: I didn't fall in love on purpose just happened when I least expected, otc as in p2p date, p4p just for company

Shadowcat: I don't mind road trip but she not willing to do otc
Dman12345
7 years ago
Warhawks: thx for your encouragement, I kind of have sour taste for the whole SC thing now, maybe in future I will try again
Dman12345
7 years ago
Mrdeuce: just read your article, seems like we fell for someone that we thought was special but then got burned
ppwh
7 years ago
When she pulls back (e.g., not sharing her upcoming schedule or texting you when she's going to the club), that's a sign to pull back, too. It's a bad thing if she feels like easily backing away isn't an option.
GoVikings
7 years ago
yeah, don't beat yourself up too much about it. even though its just a paid relationship, once you start seeing a stripper over and over, as silly as it sounds you can start to gain some feelings for her. you aren't the first and you won't be the last.
Dman12345
7 years ago
Ppwh: thx for the advice, I did actually pull way back after getting the cold shoulders, I did find out the reasons last time I seen her, i think it's just the way she conducts business, very unconventional
Dman12345
7 years ago
Govikings: thx, turning into a PL is not exactly something I am proud of, definitely put this experience in my life lessons for sure
twentyfive
7 years ago
@Dman12345 Turning into a PL is exactly what you need to do, if you want to continue this hobby. This girl saw you coming a mile away and ran a typical stripper scam on you. If you were a PL you would have recognized it right away and nipped it in the bud. Stick around and learn and soon you too, can be a PL with all of the tights and privileges that we have.
shailynn
7 years ago
Dman12345 I understand your infatuation, it happens to most (if not all) of us.

Here's what I have found in my experience. There's a girl I like, and I want to meet OTC, really let's just say what it is - I want to fuck this girl and I can't do it in the club so I have to meet her outside the club. If she's not responsive after a month or so of me trying, I move on, because it's probably not going to happen. The reason it's not going to happen? I'm not spending enough money or offering enough money for OTC, she's creeped out by me for some odd reason, or she's one of those strippers who just doesn't do OTC.

You talk to 10 strippers inside a club at least 1 of them is going to do OTC, then she has the potential to become your ATF!!!
flagooner
7 years ago
Full fledged RIL. Been there.

Consider yourself lucky that she is moving away before you get Dadillaced.

GoVikings
7 years ago
"Dadillaced"

Lol, that was clever
houjack
7 years ago
I was you 5 months ago. Almost identical, fell for stripper, went OTC once and only dinner, always dances from her whenever visit club. Except she quit and cut all contact.

I know it may not seem like it now, but you'll find another eventually, trust me. You also will not fall as hard next time.
s275ironman
7 years ago
It does suck that this happens, but you will grow from this experience. One thing that may help out a lot is to limit your visits to the club, and instead occupy your time with other things that will make you too busy to even think about the situation. Don't go to the club more than once a month. When you have a gap of at least a month in between visits, it will keep your emotions in check and significantly reduce the possibility of becoming a RIL. At least this is what works for me. I honestly never have been a RIL. I have been aware of what the signs are of becoming a RIL, even before I started posting on this forum. After a visit to a club, if I realize I behaved a lot differently towards a particular dancer than I typically do towards the others in the club, I will access the situation and think about what might happen if I let it continue. If I think I could become a RIL, I will spend some extended time away from the club and return when I know I have my emotions in check. By doing this, I don't fall into the trap of being a RIL, and I enjoy future visits to the club, whether it be with the same dancer or a different one. Always let the bigger head do the thinking. Recognize a few warning signs early on and take proper action. If you don't, it will only escalate into becoming a RIL, and that is not good for you or for her.
Dman12345
7 years ago
Dang, you guys gave good advice, i will definitely try to not visit at least more than once a month to see how my emotions checks out, i guess i hate to admitted but i'm RIL, hopefully i learn my lesson this time and not repeat again
Papi_Chulo
7 years ago
LOL "Dadillaced" should be in the TUSCL glossary
Papi_Chulo
7 years ago
A strip-club is not the place to go "looking for love" nor find a love-interest; 99% of the time you will get burned especially if you don't know how the game is.

Most of these girls already have BFs and at the same time try to juggle a couple of PLs/RILs OTC - most of them are unreliable and many of them their lives are upside-down meaning you don't wanna walk into that tornado especially if you don't know that this is often the case (that you are dealing w/ a tornado even if the skies seem clear).

You are doing the equivalent of sky-diving w/o any experience except dealing w/ strippers OTC w/o any experience is more dangerous - don't try to handle a snake if you are not an experienced snake-handler; you're gonna get bitten and perhaps poisoned.
shailynn
7 years ago
Lol Papi says "don't look for love in strip clubs."

But there we are in our PL glory. Drinking (aka) becoming inebriated, hot girls probably hotter than what any of us see in an average day in public, walking around in lingerie and even in some clubs totally nude, saying nice things to us, inflating our egos making us feel important even though we know it's just a ploy to separate us from our money - but we still fall for it... after all that how can we not fall in love once in awhile?
Papi_Chulo
7 years ago
When $$$ is being exchanged, I get the feeling dancers feel "love" much less often than PLs even though *most* of these PLs think/feel their dancer relationship is different
s275ironman
7 years ago
I think where a lot of PL's become RIL's is the fact that the dancers will usually be very friendly and receptive to their company ITC simply based on the fact that money is being exchanged. They will keep this relationship active during future club visits simply in a business sense of the typical dancer/customer situation. This is provided that the customer does not come across as being creepy, needy or emotionally unstable. Just like civilian women, dancers will keep their distance and ignore customers that have issues. Because dancers are women, they are very good at spotting it, sometimes just by looking at a customer's facial expression. Believe it or not, if you come across as being creepy, needy or emotionally unstable, a dancer will usually have no interest in spending time with you even though you do have money to spend on her. Now, if you remove money from the situation completely, the dancer would never even give the customer the time of day. That is how you know that you need to be careful and not become a RIL. I am not saying it is 100% possible to avoid it, but it is a lot easier if you always remember it is only about the money.
twentyfive
7 years ago
I second or third the nomination of Dadilaced to be added to the glossary
Daddillac
7 years ago
I'm ok with the term Daddillaced as long as I get some royalties off that shit.... it cost me a small fortune lol.

Seriously though, if it helps one guy to not blow that much cash then it's worth it.
twentyfive
7 years ago
I should have added that caveat as long as Dadillac is ok with it )
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