My theory on kissing

Have to say, I haven't met too many strippers with morals. So I don't think it's D.

I really don't understand the kissing thing with strippers. They let you do everything else to them, still can't quite grasp the logic of no kissing, but they will suck and fuck you.

Seems they feel kissing is too intimate. Which again, don't understand if they are sucking and fucking you.

Not rare for me. Happened last time I was in: just last Saturday night.

Then again, I am a RICH STUD compared to many TUSCLers who are just dumb fags, so maybe that why I may be experiencing it more than others.

I have found that when I ask them if they are into kissing, most will say "I can do that if that is what you want". Which leads me to think that most won't initiate it out of fear that the customer may not be into it. Which may be true. Who wants to kiss a stripper that you know has just sucked some other guy's cock?

Shit I am no way french kissing any of those hoes. Half of them but sucking dick all day.. I'll pass..

i agree, that for the most part, strippers kissing customers on the month is unusual. it happens, but definitely seems like much more of the exception than the norm

i think its hard to say---but IMO it just comes down to them not wanting to kiss random dudes. it is weird, like warhawks pointed out, that some will suck and fuck you but for whatever reason don't feel comfortable kissing. i think women just find kissing very intimate and therefore MOSTLY reserve it for their BF's/husbands/guys like they really like.

my CF let me kiss her not too long ago, but it was more LKF than DKF

For some reason they think it's more intimate than sucking on your dick. Not sure why.

There have been a zillion articles written, usually by escorts, that explain why someone who sucks dick or gets fucked for a living, might not engage in kissing. if you have trouble understanding this, there are lots and lots of great articles around the psychology. So much so, that I'm actually surprised when seasoned mongers or PLs express confusion.

Anyway, I would say there are usually multiple reasons they don't kiss us. In order of importance:
1. The vast majority of the reason is F: they are unattracted to us and the thought of kissing us makes them throw up in their mouth :) Besides lack of physical attraction, there's often a lack of affection, and kissing is more of an intimacy & affection thing. In short: they mostly don't kiss us because they don't want to, period, end of story.
2. Very club-specific, but in the non-extras clubs around here, "no kissing" is strictly enforced, and whereas the girls won't turn each other in if they catch another stripper letting a guy touch her ass or kitty, they all turn into Bubbles from The Wire when they catch other girls kissing customers
3. Being so tied into intimacy and affection in a way that raw sexual acts are not, kissing is both the thing they save for their SOs and boyfriends, and a psychological line-in-the-sand that lets them save a shred of dignity around the things they do

I do not engage in kissing with girls in extras clubs, but do enjoy it in the non-extras clubs I go to 90% of the time. I find it incredibly rare with girls I just have a dance with, but probably kiss 30-50% of my CFs, eventually

It used to be rare to me earlier on, but I can't seem to find a stripper that doesn't DFK in the VIP the past couple years. I've dfk'ed much more strippers than I have not in that time. I enjoy it and it's a plus in my book when a stripper does it because I know that for many, it's more intimate than wherever else their mouth goes.

I will say that I will only engage in some really heavy DFK during the start of a girl's shift where the likelihood of her mouth being "familiar" with another man that day is substantially reduced.

Most women (and some guys) see kissing as being more emotionally intimate as opposed to physically intimate. Things like FS and BJs are all about the release for *most* customers who look for extras. Kissing implies a closeness that most strippers never have, and don't want, with the vast majority of their customers. Though, I imagine that changes for some long-term regulars with deep pockets. Kissing is often associated with getting a GFE, and there's a price premium on that.

If you remove all capacity for emotional intimacy, then the no-kissing rule makes little sense. But, the reality is that strippers are emotional (sometimes highly emotional...). So, it's up to the dancer.

Strippers kiss me all the time. I must be very lovable

To be fair I've had sex with civilians, and a couple of them didn't want to kiss during sex.

I like that Shadow, I think I'll start asking them that instead of just going in for the kiss. I've had a few strippers turn away when I've gone in for the kiss.

Just to be clear when I say it's rare for them to kiss us, I'm talking about them initating the kiss. I think it's a lot more common in the extras VIP room.

Having previously been mainly a criminal law attorney and having represented a lot of sex workers I know the answer to this one: it is too intimate. I don't get it, but thats what 99% claim.

Fishsticks: "To be fair I've had sex with civilians, and a couple of them didn't want to kiss during sex."

You know you're a PL when even civilians that you just took to a Clippers game and expensive dinner won't even kiss you!!!

Fish - I never initiate kissing, I always let that come from the dancer, front of the house or VIP. Anyways, if you're not talking VIP kissing, cheek and lip pecks have been commonplace with all of them in my experience, but only my ATF would initiate front of house DFKing often.

Her schtick was GFE though, so I think kissing was a part of the business routine for her rather than a legit intimacy thing like some girls who let down their guard and start kissing in the VIP in the heat of the moment.

What about strippers kissing on the cheek,neck and ears? That seems pretty common. If you wouldn't kiss a stripper on the mouth would you kiss her other places?

My "theory" on kissing:

(1) If you're an AARP aged guy and you pay teenage girls for sex, then I guarantee that they don't want to make out with you. WTF is wrong with you, anyway?

(2) If you pursue age-appropriate girls, you're clean and a half-way decent physical specimen, then they just might enjoy making out with you.

It's evolutionary biology at work. Quite an advanced theory I know -- and I didn't even spend 10 years studying to be a Ph.D. psychotherapist.

I agree a21985. Light pecks on the neck, etc is pretty common in my experience.

What is not common, is GFE type dances. At least in my area.

@LDK- I'm talking about lip and tongue
@yahtzee-yeah I would say strippers kissing you on the cheek, ears and neck is a lot more common.
@random- I'm around the same age as a lot of these girls, so I would hope your theory would be right lol.

I've had kissers, I've had fuckers. I like to kiss while fucking them.

I think Larry would have a better time if he gave up on SCs and gave the kissing booth at the local fair a shot.

I think the reasons for not kissing are a mix of them considering it "too intimate", and some dancers being smart enough to know their is probably more disease risk from DFK, than other sex activities, for both STD and non-STD bugs. I've had dancers that kissed during LDs, and it's always a nice surprise. Sometimes this is their move right at the end of a song to get you to extend for another.

One of the girls I enjoy loves to French kiss deeply. she also gives an awesome BJ. her hygiene is impeccable and freshens up between each customer.

Larry, that you are even in the dance booth with her without treating her like a civilian and letting a front room makeout session ensue, is the reason she is not opening up to you.

SJG

RandomMember - For a guy with NO reviews you sure seem to think that you are a know it all. I am not an AARP member but I qualify at 75 years of age. I got news for you. I've had some make out sessions with young strippers (for money) that were as passionate as any I had back in high school. If you get a female turned on enough, they don't care what you look like.

SJG are you saying you make out with strippers in the front room where every one can see? I'm pretty sure the bouncers wouldn't allow that.

Larry that's what I've been saying since I first joined.

No, not every club will allow that, and it won't be with every girl. But in most of your wilder or anything goes clubs, it is quite possible. The clubs which prevent this I consider to be the modern versions of "clip joints", they sell more fantasy than reality, because whatever ensues, the girl is not opening up to you.

Letting a girl kiss you in the dance booth is nothing compared to getting her loosened up and letting you kiss her as you like in the front room. You want to get your girl off script ASAP, you don't want her to be on her dance delivery script.

Save booths and backrooms until it is time for your own pants to come down. And then after, take your girl home with you to continue.

I first learned this long ago, pre-DeJa Vu San Francisco, at New Century. An extremely cute black girl finished her set doing open tongue kissing with another girl.

They always have that in porno movies, and I FF past it. But in real life it is a powerful turn on. So next she was on my lap, and I couldn't help but comment on it. So she told me how much she was enjoying it too. Well that makes for an explosive situation.

I had actually followed her in from the sidewalk. I thought she was an officer worker and I was going to try and invite her to lunch. I got much more than I ever could have imagined. I was completely blown away by how open she was able to be with a complete stranger. Never felt comfortable in my own Grey Flannel life again.

Now at our local clubs, no touching, so that is prohibited. But it still can happen when a girl is trying to get an OTC date. And those girls give firey kissing.

And then in out underground circuit, kissing is also supposed to be prohibited, but again, if a girl wants OTC, it happens. I always start them with open tongue kissing first. It shows the girl that I like her, and it opens her up too.

Most guys miss out on what is possible because they take what is offered at face value, dances. And they treat the girls like prostitutes, instead of just like a girl they met at a party.

You have to do it in the front room, because that way you can lead it. And the girl will see that if she declines, it won't go much further.

And we know that from blackstripclubs.net and from TUSCL members accounts, that at the most extreme dives, the girls give you very little choice but to engage in front room makeout sessions, just like it is in Tijuana. If the girl doesn't make it go that way, she is likely to loose out on the session to another.

DeJa Vu has now unbranded all of their SF Clubs except Centerfolds, so they might be back to wild and wooley again. You always want to look for places where the doings are just between you and the girl, no rules except hers.

And where I first learned to approach it this way was in AMPs. You just have to learn how to use words and preliminaries to get a girl softened up. If it starts with DFKing, then it will be mind blowing for both parties. Whereas most idiots start by offering the girls money while lying on their backs, total idiots.

SJG

KING CRIMSON - EPITAPH (GREG LAKE VOCALS), very hard for anyone to equal this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bfgD3LJ6…

99% of the time it's a combo of d and f. Without the k.

Since I started clubbing again 3 years ago, half of my favorites were into kissing.
A couple of them would DFK.
The random strippers, will kiss on the cheek, sometimes, but not on the lips.

I think a big part of it is if you are a regular, and how you treat them.(and tip them!)

RandomMember - For a guy with NO reviews you sure seem to think that you are a know it all. I am not an AARP member but I qualify at 75 years of age. I got news for you. I've had some make out sessions with young strippers (for money) that were as passionate as any I had back in high school.
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@Shadow, old buddy, for the nth time I do write some reviews under an alias. I'm married, cheat on my wife, and don't travel all that much. Hence the alias. I doubt very much that my clubbing experience is below average here, and I can pay for sex with the best of you.

If you take a look at my post, I said that teenage girls don't enjoy making out with the AARP crowd. I'll bet that's almost universally true. And if your make-out sessions are that passionate, I have to wonder why you are paying; maybe they should be paying you.

i wish there was a 'like' button option. rm definitely a 'like'.

About 40% of the dancers that I do dances with do the full gfe: deep kissing with tongue; lick my neck and chest, just like real sex. Why pay for less than you get for free?

I am probably somewhere around skibums %...maybe 30-40%

...and yea its crossing the intimacy line as it conveys emotional bonding for most girls which they try to shield. Kissing also can come from being a long term regular and developing a friendly bond. One of my favorite 10 girls never used to kiss but we became pretty close after a year and yea it has made our experience super sexy

Haha I like that londonguy.

With escorts I'd also make the distinction between girls who work for an agency and girls who are considered independents. From a fair amount of experience the independents are more GFE and are willing to kiss any way you want.

Also it is somewhat market driven. Places like DC ( local to me) and NYC, Dallas, are well known for having a competitive market with good looking women who are willing to go the extra mile.

My experience level this time around is too limited to comment......but I'll throw something out that might be new info--( or not) what brought me back around in part to the nightclubs is that I started to find a considerable amount of women on dating sites to be dancers looking for a second stream of income along with some ex dancers or women who work in clubs as bartenders, barmaids, etc. Regardless of what some of us are experiencing economically the 20 something women coming out of college for the past decade are not finding good jobs. They are at the least under-employed. Even for us old farts if you can dress decently, have money and can lick your eyebrows with your tongue, you have a good shot.....kissing included. So why go to clubs you might ask.......well I can meet the same girl in a coffee shop and see her dressed in every day clothing, or I can get a good look at her on stage and if I catch her eye see what her flirt/sexual comfort level is early on.........

Many women consider kissing very intimate. Their money maker is a tool but kissing is for personal life.

And that is why I ALWAYS approach women as civilians. I want them to open up to me and fuck me as they would fuck someone they really like. I try to get the girl thinking outside the box from the first words I say to her.

SJG

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